122 lines
3.4 KiB
Plaintext
122 lines
3.4 KiB
Plaintext
|
||
-------------------------------------
|
||
|
||
Creative Ways to Answer
|
||
Your Phone
|
||
|
||
Typed By Elric of Imrryr
|
||
Lunatic Labs UnLtd.
|
||
|
||
-------------------------------------
|
||
|
||
Here is a list of strange or interesting ways to answer the phone. Whether to
|
||
be your own, your roomates, and pay phone or what have you.
|
||
|
||
Shhh! Don't talk, just listen! Meet me at the corner of Broad and Main and
|
||
bring the girl.
|
||
|
||
Martin's Mutilated Meat Market. Marvin Martin here.
|
||
|
||
Don't ever call me again!<click>
|
||
|
||
Congratulations! You've just won an all-expensive-paid trip to the Arctic!
|
||
|
||
So! You've found me! Well you won't stop me! Tomorrow I unleash Microbe X!
|
||
<click>
|
||
|
||
You continue to call? Good! Now I can place the Curse of the Rats on
|
||
you!<click>
|
||
|
||
Joe's Morgue. You stab 'em, we slab 'em.
|
||
|
||
Secret headquarters of C the Arctic!
|
||
|
||
Secret headquarters of Clown for Crime. Bozo speaking.
|
||
|
||
You relize, of course, that while you are wasting your time calling peole on
|
||
the phone, millions are starving
|
||
|
||
Admit it! You have no idea who I am!
|
||
|
||
Calling for help won't do any good! We have taken over your town today, and
|
||
tomorrow we'll take over your world!
|
||
|
||
If you don't have a good reason for calling me, I swear I will kill myself!
|
||
|
||
Hi! Wanna have sex?
|
||
|
||
International Transmutal Conglomeration of Associates. May I help you?
|
||
|
||
By calling this number you have triggered a relay that will blow up your phone.
|
||
|
||
It's -37! Okay? -37! Sheesh! Some people! <click>
|
||
|
||
Adolf Hitler speaking.
|
||
|
||
Renfield! I told you never to call me during the daytime! You know how the
|
||
sunlight burns!
|
||
|
||
Sorry can't talk right now! This building is about to blow up!
|
||
|
||
Help! We're being robbed! I -arrrggghhh...<click>
|
||
|
||
This is the year 2054. May we be of assitance?
|
||
|
||
This is Madame Olga. I see all and know all. To whom am I speaking?
|
||
|
||
Dick is out. Jane is out. Spot is out. This is their answering machine. I am
|
||
in. The beep is in. At the sound of the beep leave your name. At the sound of
|
||
the beep leave your message. <Beep!>
|
||
|
||
This is John Potz, worm cultivator
|
||
|
||
You?! Well your mother! That's right! Your mother!!!
|
||
|
||
Harvey Hathaway, hit man. I hit who you hate. Prices range from $10,000 to
|
||
$50,000.
|
||
|
||
This is Fred Farnum speaking to your from the grave.
|
||
|
||
Dis is Louis. Whose is youse?
|
||
|
||
Hello, you're on the air. May I assit you?
|
||
|
||
Hi. If you can tell me how to spell cloaca you will win 2,000!
|
||
|
||
Austin Police Department.
|
||
|
||
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z! <Click>
|
||
|
||
Hi! Are you calling to buy the parent dissolver or the organic lycanthrope
|
||
pills
|
||
|
||
This is Alexander Trumble, and this)yr the Twilight Zone.
|
||
|
||
This is Captain Blood, supervillian for hire.
|
||
|
||
It's no use! Your call won't get through! We now control the telephone company!
|
||
|
||
If you take off your skin it will get very cold outside
|
||
|
||
Death here. Hold on, I'll be right with you!
|
||
|
||
Hello. This is Walter Masters. I am undoubtedly one of most interesting people
|
||
you are going to run across in your meager life. Why are you calling me?
|
||
|
||
wn! Run! The little blue men are coming! Run! Aarrgghh!
|
||
|
||
Hang up! Right now! Just hang up!
|
||
|
||
Eggs taste terrible when they're not salted properly
|
||
|
||
You pervert! Call me again and I'll rip out your small intestines and tie it
|
||
around you scrawny little neck, you geek!
|
||
|
||
A LunaLabs Producation...
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
Downloaded From YYZ Private
|
||
Hit Any Key...
|
||
|
||
|