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Article 74841 of rec.arts.startrek:
Path: ariel.unm.edu!cs.umn.edu!spool.mu.edu!uwm.edu!lll-winken!sun-barr!newstop!exodus!twitterpater.Eng.Sun.COM!koreth
From: koreth@twitterpater.Eng.Sun.COM (Steven Grimm)
Newsgroups: rec.arts.startrek
Subject: "Reins of Power" part 1 of 3
Message-ID: <12037@exodus.Eng.Sun.COM>
Date: 23 Apr 91 01:31:29 GMT
Article-I.D.: exodus.12037
Sender: news@exodus.Eng.Sun.COM
Reply-To: koreth@twitterpater.Eng.Sun.COM (Steven Grimm)
Organization: Sun Microsystems, Inc. Mt. View, Ca.
Lines: 1302
This is a script I submitted to Paramount last year. For reasons which'll
be obvious soon, they couldn't use it or even adapt the basic story. People
have been asking what scripts look like; I thought I'd post this as an
example. I followed the same format as a couple of TNG scripts I bought at
a convention.
One caveat: There is too much stage direction in the script. That means I
describe how the characters move around the room as they talk, etc. That
sort of thing should really be left up to the director.
I've included the cast list, set list, and such at the beginning so people
can see what those look like as well. I'll post part 2 shortly, along with
some more comments about some things that are wrong with the script as it
stands now.
My thanks to the people who read and commented on this while I was writing
it, by the way. You were absolutely indispensible.
If you don't see "STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION" at the top of the title
page, your newsreader doesn't understand underlining, and you'll need to
remove all instances of "_^H" (that's underline backspace) from the file
to view it.
---
Steven Grimm koreth@ebay.sun.com Moderator, comp.{sources,binaries}.atari.st
"We must be brave, and not let them know how frightened we really are."
-- OPEN LOOK Graphical User Interface Functional Specification
--- Cut here if you want to print it out. ---
_S_T_A_R _T_R_E_K: _T_H_E _N_E_X_T _G_E_N_E_R_A_T_I_O_N
"Reins Of Power"
Written by
Steven Grimm
Story by
Steven Grimm
and
Michael Wolf
Copyright 1990, Steven Grimm
STAR TREK: "Reins Of Power" - 6/12/90 - CAST
_S_T_A_R _T_R_E_K: _T_H_E _N_E_X_T _G_E_N_E_R_A_T_I_O_N
"Reins Of Power"
_C_A_S_T
PICARD _A_m_a_i_a_n_s
RIKER FLIGHT CONTROLLER
DATA SONRI
TROI
BEVERLY _D_u_l_i_a_n_s
GEORDI TARGOFF
WORF TRODIN
WESLEY
O'BRIEN _T_r_a_h_n_s
ALLEA
COMPUTER VOICE URA
HELMSMAN YANNA
_N_O_N-_S_P_E_A_K_I_N_G
SECURITY GUARDS
DULIAN BODYGUARDS
TRAHN SOLDIERS
VARIOUS AMAIANS
VARIOUS ENTERPRISE CREW
VARIOUS DULIANS
VARIOUS TRAHN CIVILIANS
STAR TREK: "Reins Of Power" - 6/12/90 - SETS
_S_T_A_R _T_R_E_K: _T_H_E _N_E_X_T _G_E_N_E_R_A_T_I_O_N
"Reins Of Power"
_S_E_T_S
_I_N_T_E_R_I_O_R_S _E_X_T_E_R_I_O_R_S
USS ENTERPRISE USS ENTERPRISE
BRIDGE
POKER ROOM SHUTTLECRAFT
SICKBAY
BEVERLY'S OFFICE STARSEEKER
CORRIDOR
MAIN SHUTTLE BAY
DEBRIEFING ROOM
CRUSHER QUARTERS
AMAI TWO
SPACE CONTROL
DORMITORY LOBBY
DORMITORY HALLWAY
DORMITORY BEDROOM
SONRI'S ROOM
SHUTTLECRAFT
STARSEEKER
LANDING BAY
CORRIDOR
PRISON CELL
HIDEOUT
LARGE CORRIDOR (WITH BULKHEAD)
CONTROL ROOM
STAR TREK: "Reins Of Power" - 6/12/90 - PRONUNCIATION
_S_T_A_R _T_R_E_K: _T_H_E _N_E_X_T _G_E_N_E_R_A_T_I_O_N
"Reins Of Power"
_P_R_O_N_U_N_C_I_A_T_I_O_N _G_U_I_D_E
uh-MY
uh-MY-in
SAWN-tok
sawn-REE
BUSS-erd
DOO-ly-in
TRAWN
TROE-din
ale-LEE-uh
OOH-ruh
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - TEASER 1.
_S_T_A_R _T_R_E_K: _T_H_E _N_E_X_T _G_E_N_E_R_A_T_I_O_N
"Reins Of Power"
_T_E_A_S_E_R
FADE IN:
INT. POKER ROOM
DATA, GEORDI, TROI, RIKER, WORF, and O'BRIEN are playing poker.
Data has his usual visor on. Riker, O'Brien and Worf hardly have
any chips left.
Data lays down a full house.
DATA
(doing an impression)
Read 'em and weep, suckers.
The others groan. Data rakes in the chips.
O'BRIEN
(grumbling, but in jest)
Are you people sure you're not
cheating?
The others look at him like he's nuts.
O'BRIEN
(jokingly)
Well, half the people at this table
could do it if they wanted to. I
mean, Data's eyes are fast enough to
keep track of all the cards...
Data isn't offended by this -- he's more confused than anything
else. Riker decides to join in.
RIKER
(grinning)
And Counselor -- no poker face is
straight enough for you.
Troi makes a face at Riker -- she knows he's kidding.
WORF
(maybe joking; who can
tell?)
Geordi can see through the cards.
GEORDI
You're just jealous 'cause lady luck's
visiting our side of the table for
(MORE)
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - TEASER 2.
GEORDI (Cont'd)
once.
RIKER
(to O'Brien)
Visiting?
O'BRIEN
I think she's moved in.
Data is taking all this seriously.
DATA
Chief O'Brien, it would not be
sporting of me to use any abilities
beyond those of the other players.
Why would I wish to do such a thing?
O'BRIEN
It was only a joke...
Wesley bursts into the room, excited.
WESLEY
Geordi, I got 'em! I didn't think I'd
be able to, but I did! It's going to
be so great...
The others are amused by Wesley's enthusiasm.
GEORDI
Whoa. Slow down, Wes. What'd you
get?
WESLEY
(it's like a meeting with
God)
Third-row seats at a lecture on warp
field dynamics by Doctor Sontok!
GEORDI
THE Doctor Sontok? He hasn't given a
talk in years.
WESLEY
And hardly anyone knows about this
one. A friend of mine at Amai Central
University got US a pair of reserved
spots. That is, if you want to go.
GEORDI
Want to go? Of course I do! When?
Where?
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - TEASER 3.
WESLEY
It's in two days, on Amai Two.
RIKER
Two days? Wes, we can't spare the
time. We have to get to Darga Four as
quickly as possible, and that means no
diversions. We're thirty-six hours
away as it is.
DATA
We will pass within shuttle range of
the Amai system in eight point six
hours.
WESLEY
Well? It'd be worth a shuttle trip.
(off Riker's look)
Uh, with the Captain's permission, of
course.
INT. BEVERLY'S OFFICE
BEVERLY is seated, talking to Wesley, who's leaning against the
doorway.
WESLEY
OKAY, Mom. I will.
BEVERLY
And be sure to get enough sleep. I
know how you get when there's
something interesting to do.
WESLEY
Jeez, Mom, it's only a four-day
visit...
BEVERLY
I know. I'm sorry, Wes. I remember
my mother doing this, too. I told
myself I never would, but...
WESLEY
It's okay. But I REALLY have to go
now, or I think Geordi'll leave
without me!
BEVERLY
Okay. Goodbye.
Wesley turns to leave.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - TEASER 4.
WESLEY
Bye, Mom.
INT. CORRIDOR OUTSIDE SICKBAY
Geordi is waiting for Wesley. The two start walking down the
corridor.
WESLEY
Mothers. Is it just me, or are they
all like that?
GEORDI
You've got it mild, Wes. You don't
wanna KNOW how my mother used to hover
over me.
INT. MAIN SHUTTLE BAY
Wesley and Geordi enter and head toward a large shuttlecraft, the
"Cochrane," which is waiting.
GEORDI
...She smiles, looks him straight in
the eye, and says, "Just try THAT in
hyperspace!"
Wesley bursts out laughing. The two reach the shuttle and climb
in.
WESLEY
Where'd you hear THAT?
GEORDI
(as the shuttle door closes)
From a couple of Vulcan
philosophers...
The shuttlebay door opens, revealing the aft part of the
Enterprise and stars receding at warp speed.
INT. SHUTTLECRAFT
Geordi and Wesley are both seated at the controls.
DATA (VO)
(filtered)
Shuttlecraft is cleared for departure.
GEORDI
(working the controls)
Acknowledged.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - TEASER 5.
The interior of the shuttlecraft vibrates slightly as its engines
come online and it lifts off the floor.
GEORDI
Amai Two, here we come...
EXT. SPACE -- THE ENTERPRISE
A close-up of the shuttle bay from outside. The shuttle flies
out.
FADE OUT.
END OF TEASER.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT ONE 6.
_A_C_T _O_N_E
FADE IN:
EXT. SPACE -- AMAI TWO
The shuttlecraft flies toward the planet, entering the
atmosphere.
INT. AMAI TWO -- SPACE CONTROL
This is a room a lot like an airport control tower, from which
incoming and outgoing space flights are directed. There are lots
of small screens, in front of which various AMAIANS are seated.
Other than the screens, the room is white.
Amaians are fragile, tall people with extremely fair skin. They
all wear the same type of white robe, simple yet elegant.
One of the flight controllers is looking at a display showing
data about the approaching Enterprise shuttlecraft, as well as a
schematic of its flight path. She hits a button on her screen.
FLIGHT CONTROLLER
Enterprise shuttle, this is Amai Two
space control. You may land at pad
thirteen by two. Please alter your
course to zero one three mark five for
descent.
WESLEY (VO)
(filtered)
Understood, Amai Two. Adjusting
course.
INT. SHUTTLECRAFT
Geordi is asleep in the passenger compartment; his visor is on
his chest. Wesley is at the controls; he hits some buttons.
WESLEY
Geordi, we're almost there. Wake up.
Geordi awakens, barely. He's still half-asleep. He rubs his
eyes and yawns, then puts on his visor and goes up to the
copilot's chair.
GEORDI
So Wes, you still haven't told me
about your friend. How'd you two
meet?
Wesley obviously likes Sonri more than he realizes.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT ONE 7.
WESLEY
Sonri? We met on the physics net.
She's studying warp propulsion. Right
now, she's just at Amai Central
University, but she wants to go to the
Daystrom Institute later on, if
they'll accept her.
GEORDI
That's quite a leap. Amai Central
isn't exactly known for its physics
program. I didn't even know it HAD
one.
WESLEY
Not really. I mean, Amai Two isn't
exactly the most advanced place in the
Federation. They're only a member
'cause the Klingons attacked them...
GEORDI
That's not a very nice thing to say
about your friend's home planet.
WESLEY
She sure doesn't want to be there.
But she can't leave until she's
twenty-two.
GEORDI
Why not? The Daystrom Institute would
send a ship...
WESLEY
Nobody's allowed to leave until
they're married and have kids, and the
marriage age is twenty-one. It's a
pretty dumb law.
GEORDI
I don't know -- you've gotta look at
their culture to know if it makes any
sense for them.
WESLEY
If you say so.
EXT. SPACE -- THE SHUTTLECRAFT
Descending toward the planet.
INT. DORMITORY LOBBY
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT ONE 8.
This is the lobby of a University dormitory, with white walls,
floor, and furniture. There are a couple of Amaians working
here. One is painting a picture, a spectacular sunset over a
desert. The other is playing beautiful, melodic music on a
strange-looking stringed instrument; we hear the music in the
background. A third Amaian, SONRI, a plain-faced girl about
Wesley's age with long red hair and lots of freckles, is sitting
down, waiting for Geordi and Wesley. She stands when they
arrive, suitcases in hand.
SONRI
Wesley. It's good to finally see you
in person.
Sonri holds out her left hand, fingers straight and palm
vertical. Wesley holds out his left hand the same way and
presses his palm against Sonri's. He is a bit tongue-tied.
WESLEY
Hi. Uh, Sonri, this is Geordi
LaForge.
SONRI
Wesley's told me a lot about you,
Commander. It's an honor to meet such
a great mind.
Wesley is embarrassed by that, but tries to hide it. Sonri holds
out her left hand to Geordi, who returns the unfamiliar hand
greeting.
GEORDI
Well, I don't know about THAT. But
it's good to meet you, too. Call me
Geordi.
SONRI
(smiles)
Come on. I'll take you to your rooms.
Sonri turns and heads for the stairs across the room from the
entrance.
INT. DORMITORY HALLWAY
A white hallway with a white tile floor, and doors (with white
doorknobs) at even intervals. There are light grey room
"numbers" -- actually polygons representing the numbers -- on the
doors. The three are walking down the hallway.
SONRI
You're lucky you're with Starfleet.
The University usually doesn't let
visitors stay in the dorms.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT ONE 9.
GEORDI
What made Doctor Sontok decide to give
his talk HERE?
SONRI
(sheepishly)
I did, actually. I heard he collected
transitionist artwork. I know a girl
who's one of the best transitionists
in the Federation. So, I offered to
help her study for a science test.
(stops next to a door)
Here's your room, Commander. Wesley
is next door, and my room is six doors
down.
GEORDI
Okay. I'll join you two in a few
minutes.
WESLEY
Um, Sonri and I have a lot of things
to talk about. I don't mean you're
not...
GEORDI
It's okay, Wes. I understand. Sonri,
can I look around the University after
I unpack?
SONRI
Of course. Just ask anyone if you get
lost. This dormitory is Imagination
House.
Geordi nods. He turns the doorknob -- none of the doors have
locks -- and enters the room. It's all white, of course. Wesley
and Sonri continue down the hallway as Geordi shuts the door
behind him. They reach Wesley's room.
SONRI
And here's your room.
WESLEY
Great. Come on in...
Wesley opens the door, revealing a room identical to Geordi's.
INT. DORMITORY BEDROOM
Wesley and Sonri enter. Wes sets his suitcase down on the bed,
then sits next to it. Sonri sits across from him, next to a
desk. She pushes the door closed.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT ONE 10.
WESLEY
Sonri, why is this place so... so...
WHITE?
SONRI
White is the simplicity over which
individuals express their souls.
WESLEY
Huh?
SONRI
(laughs)
Sorry. Must be the artistic
philosophy classes. What I mean is,
you're free to color your personal
space any way you like. I have a
bunch of space pictures on my walls.
WESLEY
(shaking his head)
Hmm. I can see why you want to leave.
This place is great for an artist, but
I can't imagine trying to be an
engineer here.
SONRI
(nods, then, somber:)
It seems like nobody here understands
me. And I sure don't understand them.
I'm practically tone deaf, I can't
draw at all, and I think most
philosophy is pretty silly.
(frustrated)
I want to get out of here!
WESLEY
I'd offer to bring you back with me,
but the Captain would just take you
home again and lecture me.
(mimicing Picard)
"Ensign Crusher, Starfleet regulations
strictly prohibit the transfer of
unauthorized personnel."
SONRI
(giggles)
From what you've said, though, he
sounds like a wise man.
WESLEY
Yeah, he's a great captain. I sure
couldn't do his job half as well as he
does. But he can be a bit of a pain
sometimes.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT ONE 11.
SONRI
Perfection is rare, Wesley.
WESLEY
Yeah... So, what about the surprise
you said you had for me?
Sonri stands and motions with her finger -- come here...
INT. DORMITORY CORRIDOR, OUTSIDE SONRI'S ROOM
We see Geordi knocking on Wesley's door. Nobody answers, so he
starts walking down the hall toward Sonri's room. As he walks,
we hear what's going on behind the door.
SONRI (VO)
(muffled)
No. Put your hand THERE.
WESLEY (VO)
(muffled)
Oh! That's great! You're pretty good
at this.
SONRI (VO)
(muffled)
I get a lot of practice around here.
WESLEY (VO)
(muffled)
I try to do it on the holodeck at
least once a day, but there's only so
much a computer can do for you.
Geordi arrives at the door, unaware of what's going on. He
knocks. The door opens immediately, revealing Wesley and
Sonri... at a computer terminal on Sonri's desk, manipulating a
warp field diagram.
INT. SONRI'S ROOM
The walls here are covered with beautiful spacescapes. It's like
standing on the observation deck on the Enterprise.
WESLEY
Hi, Geordi... Hey, take a look at
what Sonri and I did. It's an
inverted...
GEORDI
There's no time, Wes. I just got a
call from Amai Space Control. We're
needed there.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT ONE 12.
WESLEY
(glances at Sonri)
What about the lecture?
GEORDI
We may have to miss some of it.
WESLEY
(to Sonri)
Can you record it? I have to go...
SONRI
(unhappy)
Sure, I guess I can. Try not to take
too long...
WESLEY
I will. Hopefully we'll be back soon.
(gets up)
Well, bye...
SONRI
Goodbye.
Wesley and Geordi leave the room.
INT. DORMITORY CORRIDOR
Wes and Geordi are walking away.
WESLEY
What's this about?
GEORDI
They've picked up an unidentified
ship...
INT. SPACE CONTROL
Wesley and Geordi are leaning over a console with the flight
controller.
FLIGHT CONTROLLER
We have really old sensors. We just
saw it three hours ago. It's headed
straight for Amai Two.
WESLEY
That's a really odd reading.
GEORDI
If I didn't know any better...
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT ONE 13.
FLIGHT CONTROLLER
Yes?
GEORDI
Well, that looks an awful lot like an
old Bussard ramjet design, with a
magnetic scoop.
WESLEY
A ramjet? But at those speeds, it'd
have to be...
GEORDI
...several hundred years old. Wes, we
HAVE to take a closer look.
EXT. SPACE -- THE SHUTTLECRAFT
Flying through space.
INT. SHUTTLECRAFT
Wesley and Geordi are both in the control cabin.
WESLEY
A ramjet. I know they're possible in
theory, but I don't think I've ever
heard of someone actually building
one.
GEORDI
(looking out the window)
I've only heard about one of them, but
it looks like this one's a LOT bigger.
(puzzled)
Hey, that's weird.
WESLEY
What?
GEORDI
Well, it looks like there's a low-
frequency FM signal coming from their
engines. They're using them as a
transmitter.
WESLEY
(checking his console)
It looks like an automatic signal. It
keeps repeating.
(hits some buttons, then
looks at Geordi)
Docking instructions...
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT ONE 14.
GEORDI
Looks like we're going to get a REALLY
close look at this beauty.
EXT. SPACE -- THE STARSEEKER
A large ramjet -- a cylinder, with a slightly wider section at
the fore end. The center is hollow. It moves by generating a
magnetic field and pulling hydrogen through its center, crushing
it until a fusion reaction is obtained, and expelling the
resulting energized helium like a rocket out the aft end. This
is barely visible as a dimly glowing green jet shooting from the
thin end of the Starseeker. The surface of the Starseeker should
be pitted and dented, as it's been in space for a long time with
very minimal (by Federation standards) navigational shielding.
A landing bay door opens toward the fore end, to admit the
shuttlecraft. The landing bay's ceiling is fore; its floor is
aft, since the ramjet's "gravity" is really its forward
acceleration. The bay door closes when the shuttle is inside.
INT. STARSEEKER -- LANDING BAY
This is a dirty, grungy place, very much in contrast to the
Enterprise's antiseptic interior. There are several clunky-
looking shuttlecraft present. It's apparent that nobody has been
here for a long time.
Our shuttle has just landed; its warp engines are powering down.
We hear the bay filling with air.
INT. SHUTTLECRAFT
GEORDI
I hardly see any noise from the
engine. That must be some great
shielding.
WESLEY
(looking at his controls)
Well, there's air now. It's
breathable, but a little thin. Do we
go out and look around?
Geordi is putting a small PHASER on his belt. He hands another
to Wesley.
GEORDI
Just in case. Let's go.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT ONE 15.
INT. STARSEEKER -- LANDING BAY
A door has opened to admit TARGOFF, a tall Dulian (humanoid, a
tall, very handsome race) and two Dulian BODYGUARDS. Targoff's
manner suggests that he is missing a few screws upstairs -- he's
wild-eyed and intense.
The shuttle door opens, and Geordi and Wesley emerge and stand by
the shuttle. They look at each other in surprise -- so there ARE
people here. Targoff approaches.
TARGOFF
I am Targoff, commander of the
Starseeker.
GEORDI
I'm Lieutenant Commander Geordi
LaForge, and this is Ensign Wesley
Crusher. We're from the starship
Enterprise, of the United Federation
of Planets.
TARGOFF
(pointing at the shuttle)
This is the Enterprise?
WESLEY
No. This is just a shuttle. The
Enterprise is about a third as big as
this ramjet.
TARGOFF
I see.
(indicates the doorway)
Come. I will show you the Starseeker.
GEORDI
(smiling to Wesley)
It'd be an honor. I've never been on
a ship like this before.
Targoff and his guards lead Geordi and Wesley through the door
from which they emerged. As they leave, Targoff speaks.
TARGOFF
The Starseeker has been out here for
fourteen generations. We've tried to
colonize three other planets, but they
weren't quite right for us.
INT. STARSEEKER -- CORRIDOR
We follow Geordi and Wesley through the doorway from the landing
bay. As soon as they are through the door, two more BODYGUARDS,
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT ONE 16.
their guns leveled at Geordi and Wesley, step into view.
Geordi instinctively reaches for his phaser, but the guard
nearest him bradishes his gun.
TARGOFF
Don't even think it.
Geordi and Wesley toss their phasers away. Close-up on their
reactions...
FADE OUT.
END OF ACT ONE.
Article 74846 of rec.arts.startrek:
Path: ariel.unm.edu!cs.umn.edu!spool.mu.edu!uwm.edu!lll-winken!sun-barr!newstop!exodus!twitterpater.Eng.Sun.COM!koreth
From: koreth@twitterpater.Eng.Sun.COM (Steven Grimm)
Newsgroups: rec.arts.startrek
Subject: "Reins Of Power" part 2 (of 3)
Message-ID: <12041@exodus.Eng.Sun.COM>
Date: 23 Apr 91 02:07:33 GMT
Article-I.D.: exodus.12041
Sender: news@exodus.Eng.Sun.COM
Reply-To: koreth@twitterpater.Eng.Sun.COM (Steven Grimm)
Organization: Sun Microsystems, Inc. Mt. View, Ca.
Lines: 1366
If you're reading this, I'll assume you've finished reading part 1, which
contained the teaser and act 1. Aside from the fact that my dialogue isn't
that great in places, something that can be fixed without a whole lot of
trouble, the script has some big problems.
First of all is the expense. The TNG people don't like to build more than two
sets per episode (which doesn't mean it never happens, but it's really rare.)
Set construction is very expensive, and the more you can confine your story to
a few rooms, the better off you'll be. As a rule of thumb, every Enterprise
set you've seen more than once is a standing set, and can be used if desired.
(Sets can also be redressed fairly extensively once they're built, so you may
be in good shape if you have several locations that look similar.)
Several rooms can easily be cut out of the Amai Two sequence in act one, and
some of the Starseeker sets below can be redresses of Amai Two and of existing
Enterprise sets.
The teaser is another problem. It doesn't really grab the reader. If at all
possible, each act (and the teaser) should end with a startling revelation or
with some imminent danger. Think of TNG as a series of five really short
movie serials. The hero has to be dangling over the alligator pit at the end
of each segment. (In truth, of course, we want the viewer to be glued to the
set during the commercials to avoid missing the resolution to the problem.)
The first act isn't a whole lot better. There's no action, no plot movement.
There is some character interaction, which is always good, but the plot needs
to move along while that's happening. Until the end of act one, we don't even
have a clue what the plot's going to be ABOUT.
Anyway, I'll shut up now and let the story continue. I'll post part 3 shortly,
with a couple of comments about coming up with stories. (The page numbers
start over at 1 here, just because I'm too lazy to make nroff start at the
appropriate number.)
---
Steven Grimm koreth@ebay.sun.com Moderator, comp.{sources,binaries}.atari.st
"We must be brave, and not let them know how frightened we really are."
-- OPEN LOOK Graphical User Interface Functional Specification
--- cut here ---
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT TWO 1.
_S_T_A_R _T_R_E_K: _T_H_E _N_E_X_T _G_E_N_E_R_A_T_I_O_N
"Reins Of Power"
_A_C_T _T_W_O
FADE IN:
INT. STARSEEKER -- PRISON CELL
This is a dark, poorly-kept cell. The jailers are obviously not
too concerned about prisoner sanitation. There's a small window
in the metal door, blocked by a grid of bars. There are no
benches or beds in the cell. Geordi is sitting on the floor
against the wall opposite the door. His visor has been taken
away. Wesley is by the door, looking out the window. He turns.
Then he tries tapping his communicator; it buzzes.
GEORDI
Their shielding's too good, Wes. Just
sit down. They'll be back.
WESLEY
They've just left us sitting here for
hours. They can't want us too much.
GEORDI
That all depends on what they want us
FOR. They may just be trying to break
our spirits. When you go to the
Academy, you'll be trained for things
like this.
WESLEY
(sitting)
Unfortunately, I'm here NOW.
(sighs)
So, what'd you think of Sonri?
GEORDI
She seemed nice enough. The important
thing is, what do YOU think of her?
WESLEY
What do you mean?
GEORDI
It's pretty obvious. You have a
crush.
WESLEY
What? No. I mean, I... No.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT TWO 2.
GEORDI
There's nothing wrong with it, Wes.
It's natural...
WESLEY
Look... I like her a lot. But I
certainly don't have a CRUSH on her.
Okay?
GEORDI
(amused)
All right, Wes, if you say so.
WESLEY
Anyway, I don't want to talk about her
any more. How about a game of chess?
GEORDI
Um, Wesley, we don't have a board, and
I couldn't see it if we did.
WESLEY
Who said anything about a board?
GEORDI
Right... Okay, I think I can manage
that.
WESLEY
Pick a number between one and ten.
GEORDI
Three.
WESLEY
Okay, you're white. Ready?
GEORDI
Give me a second.
(beat)
Okay, got it. Um, pawn to queen four.
WESLEY
Knight to...
The game is interrupted by the entrance of Targoff, and a pair of
TRAHN GUARDS. The Trahns are shorter than the Dulians, and are
not very good-looking. There is a Trahn guard standing outside
the cell door. Geordi stands.
GEORDI
(quietly, to Wesley)
I'll do the talking.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT TWO 3.
TARGOFF
We have examined your shuttlecraft.
You have some VERY interesting
technology. It could mean an end to
our journey, after fourteen
generations in space.
GEORDI
(turning to face Targoff's
voice)
Be careful which buttons you push, or
you might find yourself with a big
hole where your landing bay door used
to be.
TARGOFF
(as if berating a
subordinate)
Be quiet. Now. Obviously, there
isn't enough room for all of us on
your shuttle. So tell me of your
Enterprise.
GEORDI
Oh, no. You aren't going to get
anything out of us while you keep us
prisoner.
TARGOFF
Wrong. You will tell me what I want
to know, and you'll tell it to me
here.
GEORDI
Or what?
TARGOFF
This is one of the pleasant areas of
the Starseeker. Others are much
closer to the magnetic coils. The
shielding is not as... effective
there. We lost a great many Trahns
before closing those sections off.
GEORDI
And what do you hope to gain from a
knowledge of the Enterprise?
TARGOFF
All knowledge is useful. Now. Tell
me of the Enterprise. How many men
can it carry? What are its armaments?
Anything like your hand weapon?
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT TWO 4.
GEORDI
You'll find out if you keep us here...
EXT. SPACE -- THE ENTERPRISE
Coming toward the camera, then going into orbit around Amai Two.
PICARD (VO)
Captain's log, stardate 44505.9. The
Darga Four situation is under control.
We're stopping off at Amai Two for
some brief shore leave.
INT. BRIDGE
PICARD, RIKER, DATA, and WORF are at their stations. The Amai
Two flight controller is on the viewscreen.
PICARD
(in disbelief)
A WHAT?
FLIGHT CONTROLLER
That IS what he said. A ramjet.
PICARD
Data, sensor reading?
DATA
We are picking up an electromagnetic
disturbance. Its signatures are
similar to those of traditional ramjet
designs.
PICARD
(to the controller)
And they left how long ago?
FLIGHT CONTROLLER
A day and a half.
RIKER
Sounds like they missed their
lecture...
PICARD
Thank you, Amai Two. Enterprise out.
The controller's face goes away.
PICARD
Well. This is an unexpected treat.
Helm, set course for the disturbance,
(MORE)
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT TWO 5.
PICARD (Cont'd)
warp factor three.
HELMSMAN
Course plotted and laid in.
PICARD
Engage.
EXT. SPACE -- THE ENTERPRISE
Going to warp speed (stock footage.)
INT. BRIDGE
RIKER
So much for stopping off at Amai Two
for a couple of days.
PICARD
Mm. But this is much more absorbing,
Number One. Besides, I don't think
Amai Two would be quite to your
liking.
RIKER
I was thinking of you, sir. A whole
planet full of artists and
philosophers:
(smirking)
you'd be on the first shore party.
PICARD
Indeed, Number One. Perhaps later.
Time to arrival, Mister Data?
DATA
Forty-six minutes, twenty-one seconds,
sir.
PICARD
Increase to warp five.
HELMSMAN
Aye, sir.
WORF
I have a more detailed scan now,
Captain.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT TWO 6.
PICARD
On screen.
A computer representation of the Starseeker appears on the
screen. It shows the electromagnetic field, the cone of incoming
hydrogen, and the accelerated fused results leaving the other
end, all in animated schematics. Picard is like a kid in a candy
store -- this is why he's out in space.
PICARD
Remarkable. Absolutely astounding.
WORF
Length is approximately one kilometer.
DATA
Intense magnetic fields are drawing
hydrogen in one end and compressing
it, resulting in a fusion reaction
which...
PICARD
(interrupting)
Yes, Data, we know how a ramjet works.
(to Worf)
Any sign of the shuttle?
WORF
Not yet.
DATA
The ramjet's electromagnetic fields
will prevent reliable sensor and
transporter operation.
INT. PRISON CELL
Geordi and Wesley are sitting alone again, but not for long:
Targoff barges in, accompanied by two Trahns. The same guard is
outside the cell door; he watches. One of Targoff's Trahns is
carrying Geordi's visor. Targoff points at Geordi, then at the
door. The Trahn with Geordi's visor picks him up by the arm and
starts to lead him off.
WESLEY
(standing)
Hey! Where are you taking him?
TARGOFF
He is going to aid us in capturing
your Enterprise. It has arrived here.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT TWO 7.
GEORDI
(facing Targoff's voice)
What? You've got another think
coming, Targoff.
TARGOFF
I don't think so. Trahn.
Targoff pushes the other Trahn toward Wesley. The Trahn grabs
Wesley by the arm. Wes tries to squirm free, but the guard is
far too strong. The guard pulls out a sharp knife.
TARGOFF
(to Geordi)
If you refuse, we will kill your
companion.
GEORDI
And if I agree, you'll kill even more
people trying to take over the
Enterprise. No deal.
TARGOFF
Ah. But their deaths will be quick,
painless. Your companion's will not.
GEORDI
I'm sorry, Wes. You know I can't do
it.
Targoff stares into Geordi's eyes. He can't read them at all,
and finally turns away with a slight shiver -- those white eyes
give him the creeps.
TARGOFF
Very well. Trahn?
The Trahn cuts Wesley's hand with the blade of the knife. Wesley
does his best to keep quiet, but doesn't quite succeed. Geordi
hears this and flinches, but holds fast.
TARGOFF
Now the left eye.
The Trahn moves to comply...
GEORDI
All right, all right! You're a bunch
of barbarians, you know that?
TARGOFF
(smugly)
Yes.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT TWO 8.
GEORDI
And my help won't amount to much.
There's still no way you're going to
get enough people aboard to make the
Enterprise's security teams sweat.
TARGOFF
Our soldiers are very good at what
they do. Your shuttlecraft will hold
enough of them. All you need do is
bring them aboard.
GEORDI
You trust me to do that?
TARGOFF
Of course. If you betray us, your
companion will see his heart before he
dies. Trahn, take him. Give him his
eyepiece.
Geordi, putting on his visor, is escorted out of the room by one
of the Trahns. Targoff stares at Wesley for a moment, then
signals the other Trahn to let go of Wes. Wes collapses to the
floor, clutching his hand.
TARGOFF
With me, Trahn.
The two aliens leave.
INT. BRIDGE
The Starseeker is on the main viewer.
PICARD
Still no response to our hails?
WORF
None, sir. They could...
(notices a flashing light)
Captain, a section of the ramjet is
opening. Something is emerging...
Sir, it's the shuttle!
PICARD
(stands up)
On viewer.
The view switches to a close-up of the Starseeker landing bay,
which is closing again. The shuttle is flying away.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT TWO 9.
WORF
Interference from the ramjet is too
great for a detailed scan, or for
visual communication.
(beat)
Sir, the shuttle is hailing us... on
an EMERGENCY channel...
PICARD
(looks at Riker in surprise)
On audio.
GEORDI (VO)
(filtered)
LaForge here, Captain.
PICARD
Report.
GEORDI (VO)
(filtered)
The ramjet is called the Starseeker.
Its engine control systems are dead.
Wes is there now, working on them, but
we need some spare parts, and fast.
PICARD
Understood.
(motions to Worf)
Shuttle bay two is ready.
GEORDI (VO)
(filtered)
Thank you, sir. LaForge out.
WORF
Security team to shuttle bay two.
Worf walks quickly from the bridge, leaving via the main
turbolift.
INT. SHUTTLECRAFT
We are approaching the Enterprise. The shuttlecraft is packed
with TRAHN SOLDIERS, all armed with nasty-looking guns (plasma
pistols.) Their leader, TRODIN, a Dulian, is pointing Geordi's
phaser at his head. Geordi hits some buttons, and shuttle bay
two's door starts to open.
TRODIN
(looking at the Enterprise)
That one is shuttle bay two?
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT TWO 10.
GEORDI
Yes.
TRODIN
Land in the large one,
(pointing to the main
shuttle bay)
THERE.
GEORDI
But the door's closed...
TRODIN
(brings the phaser closer)
Then open it, like you did the other.
I won't walk into your trap.
(brings the phaser REALLY
close)
Now!
INT. MAIN SHUTTLE BAY
The door opens, and the shuttle flies in...
FADE OUT.
END OF ACT TWO.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT THREE 11.
_A_C_T _T_H_R_E_E
FADE IN:
INT. SHUTTLE BAY
The shuttlecraft enters the bay. As soon as it clears the force
field, its door opens and soldiers jump to the floor. One of
them shoots a SECURITY GUARD, who was on duty next to the main
doorway and had just managed to draw his phaser. The guard
falls, his weapon lying a few feet away. The shuttle, meanwhile,
has landed; Trodin shoves Geordi out at phaserpoint. The
soldiers make for the door.
INT. BRIDGE
DATA
Sir, the shuttle has landed in the
main shuttle bay, not bay two.
Notifying Lieutenant Worf.
Data hits some buttons. The red alert siren sounds.
DATA
Weapons have been fired in the main
shuttle bay. Intruders have left the
bay.
PICARD
Activate force fields.
DATA
Activating.
INT. CORRIDOR
The Trahn soldiers (one of whom is holding the security guard's
phaser,) Geordi, and Trodin are stuck in a section of corridor.
One of the soldiers tests the force field with a hand.
TRODIN
Get rid of those walls.
Geordi touches a wall panel, which activates.
GEORDI
Computer, deactivate force fields.
COMPUTER (VO)
Chief Engineer does not have authority
to countermand Chief of Security.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT THREE 12.
GEORDI
I can't...
TRODIN
Then remove the power source, Chief
Engineer.
GEORDI
I can't do that.
TRODIN
(pointing his gun at Geordi)
You will try, or I will kill you.
GEORDI
Then I guess you'll have to kill me.
All I promised was to get you onboard,
and you're here.
Trodin points the phaser at Geordi's head for a moment.
TRODIN
No. You may still be useful.
Trodin turns and fires the phaser at the wall next to the force
field. The phaser-toting soldier does the same. Sparks start to
fly across the corridor.
GEORDI
Wait! If you overload those circuits,
the whole corridor could blow!
TRODIN
(still firing)
Then help us.
GEORDI
Computer, decouple power nodes
thirteen by F-three and twelve by D-
eight. Propogate.
The force fields vanish; Trodin and the soldier stop firing the
phasers. We see that the walls are scorched from the phaser
hits.
At Trodin's motioned command, the troops run around a corner --
and right into Worf and a group of SECURITY GUARDS, who were
coming the other way. There's no time to draw weapons; hand-to-
hand combat ensues. Worf throws one Trahn against a computer
panel, which lights up then deactivates several seconds later
(though this shouldn't be emphasized) when there's no command.
We notice Trodin escaping, though none of the Enterprise people
do. The battle is over shortly, thanks largely to Worf.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT THREE 13.
GEORDI
Wait a minute. There's one missing...
INT. CORRIDOR
Trodin is running down the corridor when the force fields come
back on. He slams into one, painfully, but immediately gets up
and fires at the emitter, as before.
FX: TRANSPORTER. Trodin starts to beam out.
He looks at his body and yelps in surprise.
TRODIN
What the...?
EXT. SPACE -- ENTERPRISE AND STARSEEKER
Time has passed.
INT. SICKBAY
The security guard from the shuttle bay is on a bed, unconscious.
One of the Trahn soldiers is on another bed nearby, also
unconscious. There are two security guards present. Beverly is
scanning the soldier. Picard enters and goes to the guard's bed.
PICARD
How's he doing, Doctor?
BEVERLY
He'll be ready for duty again in a
couple of days.
PICARD
(walking to the soldier's
bed)
And your other patient?
BEVERLY
He has minor head injuries and some
internal bleeding. That must have
been some fight.
PICARD
Worf was involved.
Beverly looks at the captain. That explains it...
PICARD
Anything else, Doctor?
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT THREE 14.
BEVERLY
His brain chemistry is very odd. I
can't be sure right now, but my guess
is that he's received large doses of
drugs recently.
PICARD
Drugs? For what purpose?
BEVERLY
I won't know until I've had a chance
to run more tests.
She stops working for a moment.
BEVERLY
Jean-Luc, I'm really...
PICARD
I know, Beverly. We'll get him back.
Beverly isn't convinced. But she goes back to work.
INT. DEBRIEFING ROOM
Troi, Riker, and Worf are grilling Trodin. There are two
security guards standing behind Trodin, ready to stun him if he
tries anything. Trodin is very calm, though. Worf is playing
the "bad cop."
RIKER
We know you're the leader of this
little gang.
TRODIN
Obviously...
TROI
What do you mean by that?
TRODIN
They are Trahns. I am a Dulian.
WORF
That means nothing to us.
TRODIN
That... is your problem.
WORF
(leaning in close)
I warn you. Do not mock us.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT THREE 15.
RIKER
Worf...
(to Trodin)
Now. Tell us about your ship.
TRODIN
You mean you can't see inside with
your powerful scanners?
RIKER
We want to hear it from you.
TRODIN
(peering at Riker)
You CAN'T scan us, can you? You're
not as powerful as you look.
WORF
We are strong enough. Now answer our
questions!
TRODIN
No. I'm your prisoner, so you're
going to kill me whether I tell you
anything or not.
Troi looks at Riker -- what does this imply about the culture
over there?
RIKER
We never kill unless we're forced to.
TRODIN
(lying, and not hiding it)
Neither do we.
TROI
WE mean it. Right now, one of your
soldiers is receiving medical
attention.
Trodin looks at Troi.
TRODIN
But they're all Trahns. Why?
TROI
They are people.
TRODIN
Not the same way we are.
(beat)
They're barbaric, uncivilized fools.
If it weren't for us, they'd've killed
themselves off by now.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT THREE 16.
TROI
Your people are subjugating the
Trahns...
TRODIN
Ruling them.
RIKER
It sounds more like slavery to me...
TRODIN
(laughs)
Subjugation! Slavery! The Trahns are
glad to be ruled. We've given up as
much as they have. We share the
Starseeker with them. We give them
the benefits of our technology, our
expertise...
WORF
But not your medicine?
TRODIN
They already outnumber us ten to one.
We don't want to make it even worse.
RIKER
It sounds like it already IS worse.
INT. BEVERLY'S OFFICE
Beverly is seated, working at the viewscreen on her desk. We see
a complex molecular model -- the drug from the Trahn's brain.
BEVERLY
Crusher to Captain Picard.
PICARD (VO)
(filtered)
Picard here.
BEVERLY
I've isolated our mystery drug.
(looks at the model)
This is a VERY well-designed chemical.
It appears to selectively inhibit
neural impulses in the brain of the
subject.
PICARD (VO)
(filtered)
A mind-control drug?
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT THREE 17.
BEVERLY
I think so.
PICARD (VO)
(filtered)
What does it control?
BEVERLY
I don't know for sure, but my guess is
it's to keep them submissive. It's
physically addictive. If the drug
were removed, the shock would probably
kill the patient.
(disgusted)
They'd have no choice but to keep
taking it.
INT. BRIDGE
Picard and Data are at their stations. The others are manned by
various crewmembers.
PICARD
Can it affect humans?
BEVERLY (VO)
(filtered)
It's very specific to this species'
brain chemistry.
PICARD
(nodding)
Understood.
(sighs, then, to himself:)
Barbaric.
DATA
Sir? Human history contains several
instances of drug usage by military
agencies, to ensure loyalty.
PICARD
That doesn't make it right, Data.
DATA
(considers this)
I see, sir. But the Prime Directive
would seem to apply here.
PICARD
The moment Commander LaForge and
Mister Crusher were captured, we
became intimately involved in all
this. And we will remain involved
(MORE)
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT THREE 18.
PICARD (Cont'd)
until Wesley is returned.
RIKER (VO)
(filtered)
Captain? We're finished with our
questioning.
PICARD
(standing)
Report to the conference room. Mister
Data, you have the conn.
Picard heads for the conference room.
EXT. SPACE -- THE ENTERPRISE
Time has passed.
INT. CONFERENCE ROOM
Geordi, Picard, Riker, Troi, Beverly, and Worf are present.
Beverly is close to tears.
BEVERLY
These people sound hideous. We can't
just sit out here and wait, Jean-Luc.
WORF
Recommend we demonstrate our ability
to find Ensign Crusher by force.
RIKER
I'm with Worf on this one. It's time
we showed them we can bite back.
GEORDI
I'm not sure it would make any
difference. Their leader seemed like
he wasn't quite all there.
PICARD
We will use force, if necessary. But
if they're willing to kill Wesley,
they've already done it by now.
Otherwise, he's safe for a while
longer.
BEVERLY
You don't KNOW that!
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT THREE 19.
PICARD
Doctor, please.
(gently)
I know he's your son. But we must
treat this as we would any other
hostage situation.
Beverly bites back a strong response, then nods weakly. Troi
puts a hand on her forearm, reassuring her.
PICARD
Now. Mister Worf, what have you
learned from the rest of the boarding
party?
WORF
(slightly chagrined)
Nothing, sir. They refused to
speak...
BEVERLY
(nods)
That'd be an effect of the drug,
Captain. We're not going to get
anything from them.
DATA (VO)
(filtered)
Captain, the Starseeker is hailing us.
Picard looks at his staff. Here it comes...
PICARD
On my way, Commander.
Everyone leaves for the bridge.
INT. BRIDGE
Everyone comes in from the conference room and goes to the
appropriate station.
PICARD
Let's hear it.
TARGOFF (VO)
(filtered)
I am Commander Targoff of the
Starseeker. Enterprise, respond at
once!
PICARD
This is Captain Jean-Luc Picard of the
Federation starship Enterprise. You
(MORE)
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT THREE 20.
PICARD (Cont'd)
have captured and held a member of my
crew.
TARGOFF (VO)
(filtered)
Yes, we have. At the moment, he is
unharmed.
Beverly is relieved at this, but Targoff's next words have the
opposite effect:
TARGOFF (VO)
(filtered)
(continuing)
He will die, unless you give me
control of your ship NOW.
PICARD
No. We will not be coerced.
TARGOFF (VO)
(filtered)
Very well. Then you will hear your
Wesley Crusher's screams as his limbs
are ripped from his body.
Beverly is NOT amused by this.
BEVERLY
No! Harm him in the slightest, and
I'll see you shrieking with...
PICARD
(whispering)
Doctor!
TARGOFF (VO)
(filtered)
I see my threat is effective. Trahn!
Bring our prisoner here.
INT. STARSEEKER -- PRISON CELL
Wesley is asleep on the floor in a corner. He has ripped a strip
of cloth from his shirt; it's wrapped around his injured hand.
He wakes up as four Trahn guards, all armed, enter. One of them
points a gun at Wesley, and motions for him to go through the
door.
Wesley gets up.
FADE OUT.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT THREE 21.
END OF ACT THREE.
Article 74847 of rec.arts.startrek:
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From: koreth@twitterpater.Eng.Sun.COM (Steven Grimm)
Newsgroups: rec.arts.startrek
Subject: "Reins Of Power" part 3 (of 3)
Message-ID: <12047@exodus.Eng.Sun.COM>
Date: 23 Apr 91 02:50:04 GMT
Sender: news@exodus.Eng.Sun.COM
Reply-To: koreth@twitterpater.Eng.Sun.COM (Steven Grimm)
Organization: Sun Microsystems, Inc. Mt. View, Ca.
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I hope you're all enjoying the story so far. I think you'll agree that acts
two and three are a big improvement over the teaser and act one; the last
two acts, IMHO, are the best.
First, some words about where good stories come from. In general, the most
successful TNG episodes are based on character interaction, and the science
fiction stories that surround the character stuff is essentially spraypainted
on. "The Nth Degree," for instance, is about Barclay, not about subspace
field distortions or neural interfaces. (I think that's an example everyone
can agree on, if you ignore the last five minutes.)
There are exceptions -- "Yesterday's Enterprise" was more plot-driven than
character-driven. But I think they're pretty rare. A story that starts out
from solid characterization, in which the technical stuff is secondary, will
by and large be more successful than a story based on gadgets, in which our
people just happen to be the ones using them.
Of course, the spraypaint is important, too; this is Star Trek, after all.
In general, if a story is action-packed and has lots of suspense, it's more
likely to be accepted. By no means, though, try to shoehorn suspense and
danger into a story. That usually comes out pretty poorly (the "tacked on
jeopardy" technique.) It's almost always possible to get some tension out
of a good story without forcing things. It's also important to make sure the
plot is intimately related to the character story -- we can have Riker and
Beverly fall in love, but if it has nothing to do with the mission at hand,
it's going to look hackneyed. (Multiple unrelated stories may be more
realistic, but this is drama, not a documentary.)
And with that, I'll present the final part of "Reins Of Power." I hope you
can read it with a critical eye, to see where I've violated these guidelines.
If I had this story to do over today (assuming I could still use Wesley!)
it'd come out fairly differently.
---
Steven Grimm koreth@ebay.sun.com Moderator, comp.{sources,binaries}.atari.st
"We must be brave, and not let them know how frightened we really are."
-- OPEN LOOK Graphical User Interface Functional Specification
--- cut here ---
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT FOUR 1.
_S_T_A_R _T_R_E_K: _T_H_E _N_E_X_T _G_E_N_E_R_A_T_I_O_N
"Reins Of Power"
_A_C_T _F_O_U_R
FADE IN:
EXT. SPACE -- THE ENTERPRISE AND THE STARSEEKER
PICARD (VO)
Captain's log, supplemental. It has
been twenty minutes since Targoff
threatened to kill Wesley Crusher. We
have heard nothing since then.
EXT. SPACE -- THE STARSEEKER
Establish the location...
INT. HIDEOUT
This room, in a neglected part of the Starseeker, is the lair of
the secret Trahn leader. There are tattered pieces of cloth
blocking the entrance. ALLEA, a particularly ugly Trahn woman of
about sixty, is talking to a few other Trahns when Wesley is
brought in, struggling, by the four Trahn guards.
WESLEY
Where are you taking me? Let me go!
Allea motions to the guards, who release Wesley. She is very
confident in her speech.
ALLEA
You are from the Enterprise.
WESLEY
That's right. Where's Targoff? I
want to talk to him NOW.
ALLEA
It would be a sad day indeed if
Targoff were HERE, Enterprise crewman.
Do you have a name? I am Allea.
WESLEY
Ensign Wesley Crusher. What's going
on here?
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT FOUR 2.
ALLEA
Please, sit.
Allea motions to a worn chair. It doesn't look comfortable, but
after the floor, Wesley gladly accepts. He looks at Allea, then
looks around the room.
WESLEY
Targoff doesn't know about this place,
does he? Or about you.
ALLEA
He knows about me. He just doesn't
know where I am. The Starseeker is a
big place. He can only watch some of
it, especially when some of his
eyes...
(indicates the guards)
are really mine.
WESLEY
What's going on here? Does Targoff
know you have me?
ALLEA
If he doesn't, he'll discover it soon.
You should be grateful. He was about
to have you tortured, to pressure your
Enterprise.
WESLEY
(snorts)
It wouldn't have worked.
ALLEA
I believe that. But Targoff's grasp
of the real world is not very tight.
In any case, I decided that you would
be more useful alive, and in my hands.
WESLEY
(nervous)
Useful? How?
ALLEA
(off his look)
No, nothing like that. We usually
leave the torture to the Dulians.
WESLEY
Then what do you want with me?
ALLEA
The same thing Targoff did, really.
He's not completely stupid. When he
(MORE)
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT FOUR 3.
ALLEA (Cont'd)
can't deliver you, he'll know the
Enterprise won't be too pleased about
it. He'll want you back, and quickly.
I intend to use that.
WESLEY
By holding a hostage hostage?
ALLEA
We have some demands which must be
heard, and this is the only way we'll
get Targoff and his council to listen
to us.
WESLEY
Demands. What are they?
ALLEA
We want access to the Starseeker's
hospitals. We want a seat on the
ruling council. We want the curfews
lifted and the checkpoints removed.
WESLEY
You shouldn't need to take a hostage
to get THOSE. None of that sounds
unreasonable.
ALLEA
But the Dulians are unreasonable.
Completely.
WESLEY
Why? What do they do?
ALLEA
We work for them, and they give us
just enough freedom to keep us from
rioting.
WESLEY
You're slaves...
ALLEA
(sarcastic)
They saved us. If it weren't for
THEM, we'd all be dead.
WESLEY
What do you mean?
ALLEA
We couldn't stay on our planet.
Almost all the plants and animals were
(MORE)
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT FOUR 4.
ALLEA (Cont'd)
dead from the pollution. So the
Dulians built the Starseeker. They'd
find another world, and try to make up
for what they did to ours. They told
us that included an end to the labor
camps. They just wanted some of us
here, too.
WESLEY
So you and the Dulians are from the
same planet.
ALLEA
Yes. When they found us, we were
living among the trees. We were at
peace with the world.
WESLEY
And they took you back with them,
right? This is really familiar. It's
happened on hundreds of planets.
ALLEA
They took our great-grandparents back
to their cities. It was all so new to
us then. They seemed like gods to us.
We didn't know any better than to do
what they asked, at first.
WESLEY
And then?
ALLEA
And then we saw them for what they
were. People, who had more knowledge
than we did and were using it to force
us into submission.
WESLEY
Didn't you fight back?
ALLEA
There were revolts, but the Dulians
were too powerful. They even used
drugs to keep us obedient after the
first couple of times. We never did
anything but make them angry, and make
our own lives worse.
Wesley mulls this over.
WESLEY
Isn't kidnapping me going to do the
same thing?
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT FOUR 5.
ALLEA
It would. But now THEY have a knife
at their throats. The Enterprise.
They're as defenseless against it as
we are against them. Oh, Targoff
won't see it for a while. He's been
in charge too long, and he can't
imagine being challenged by anyone.
But I've talked to the guards who saw
your shuttle, who tested your weapons.
You're generations ahead of us.
WESLEY
(looking around)
Well, yeah, we are. But if you're
expecting the Enterprise to start
cutting the Starseeker to pieces until
the Dulians give in, you're in for a
surprise.
ALLEA
Meaning?
WESLEY
Meaning that we're peaceful.
ALLEA
Peaceful? So why were you armed?
WESLEY
For SELF-DEFENSE. If the Starseeker
started attacking the Enterprise, it
would shoot back. But otherwise,
they'll wait.
(sighs)
And even if they didn't, you're still
not doing this right. Okay, let's say
Targoff agrees to your demands. Then
what? I leave the ship, and the
Enterprise goes away. What's to stop
Targoff from clamping down on you?
Allea looks angry for a moment, and almost says something. She
thinks better of it.
ALLEA
We have to do SOMETHING. We can't
just let ourselves be crushed.
WESLEY
I agree. You DO have to do something.
But it has to be a lot more than just
asking for a few stupid little tokens.
The only way your people are going to
get out of this is if YOU'RE the ones
(MORE)
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT FOUR 6.
WESLEY (Cont'd)
on top. The Dulians won't let you get
away with anything else.
ALLEA
A rebellion? No. We tried it on our
planet...
WESLEY
This isn't your planet. From what
I've seen, you outnumber them.
There's no reason you can't free
yourselves.
ALLEA
But... the Dulians are in control of
the ship. They can just seal all the
doors and keep us away. We wouldn't
know how to open them.
WESLEY
I can help you with that. I know a
few things about electronics.
ALLEA
I have to think about this...
WESLEY
Don't think about it, Allea. Do it.
The longer you think about stuff like
this, the more reasons you'll make up
to avoid it. And this is the only
time you'll have me here to help you.
This is the only way you're going to
get anything but tokens from the
Dulians.
ALLEA
Why are you offering all this? What
do you get?
WESLEY
Get? I don't GET anything. I just
don't like to see people... oppressed
like this. It's not right, and if I
can help, I will.
ALLEA
Maybe you're right. I just don't
know.
(beat)
Are all the people on the Enterprise
so... strong-willed?
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT FOUR 7.
WESLEY
(calming down)
No. I guess... I guess I take after
my mother. The captain usually leaves
things alone, like the Prime Directive
says.
(pauses)
But I'm already involved here... Now
I'm just hitting back.
EXT. SPACE -- THE ENTERPRISE
INT. BRIDGE
Everyone except Wesley is present.
BEVERLY
How long are you going to sit here and
wait?
PICARD
No longer. Mister Worf, hail the
Starseeker.
WORF
Hailing.
(beat)
No response.
PICARD
(nods)
Mister Data, a ramjet always moves at
high speeds...
DATA
Correct, sir. Hydrogen intake must be
sufficient to propel the vessel, or it
cannot power its engines.
PICARD
Helm, take us to the aft end of the
Starseeker.
EXT. SPACE -- THE ENTERPRISE AND THE STARSEEKER
The Enterprise moves to the aft end of the Starseeker, out of the
way of the emerging stream of helium.
INT. BRIDGE
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT FOUR 8.
PICARD
Ready a tractor beam.
WORF
Tractor beam ready, sir.
PICARD
Decrease their speed gradually,
Lieutenant.
WORF
Engaging tractor beam.
EXT. SPACE -- THE ENTERPRISE AND THE STARSEEKER
The Enterprise hits the Starseeker with a tractor beam.
INT. BRIDGE
DATA
They are slowing, Captain. Their
engine output is not significantly
altered.
RIKER
It's just a tap on the shoulder for
now, Data.
PICARD
But it should prompt Targoff to turn
around and talk to us.
WORF
Nothing yet, sir.
PICARD
There will be.
INT. HIDEOUT
URA, a Trahn man, enters the room.
URA
Allea! The Enterprise is attacking
the Starseeker!
WESLEY
What? They wouldn't...
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT FOUR 9.
ALLEA
Ura, tell me all you know.
URA
They have some kind of ray that's
slowing us down. Allea, if we get
below the minimum...
ALLEA
I know!
(thinks)
Has Targoff talked to them since we
took Wesley?
URA
I don't think so.
WESLEY
Well, then, that's why! They're
trying to get Targoff to talk.
ALLEA
And if he won't, we're all dead.
(decides)
We can't let this happen. All right,
Wesley, show us what to do.
INT. BRIDGE
DATA
Their engine output has decreased by
forty percent.
WORF
Sir, we're being hailed.
RIKER
Finally.
PICARD
Open channel. Disengage tractor beam.
WORF
Tractor beam off. Channel open.
TARGOFF (VO)
(filtered)
What are you doing?
PICARD
Commander Targoff, we will not sit
idly by while you toy with us.
Release my crewman at once.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT FOUR 10.
TARGOFF (VO)
(filtered)
Or you'll destroy us, and him?
PICARD
Oh, no. We'll do far worse than
destroy you, Targoff. We'll strand
you, in the middle of space.
TARGOFF (VO)
(filtered)
I see. Picard, I'm going to be
honest. The reason I haven't called
you is... well, you see, your crewman
has been kidnapped.
PICARD
Of COURSE he has! That's the point of
all this!
TARGOFF (VO)
(filtered)
From us, I mean.
PICARD
He's been abducted? By whom?
TARGOFF (VO)
(filtered)
There are a few radical Trahns who
don't know their places. We've just
ignored them before, but now we're
looking.
Picard signals that the transmission should be cut off.
PICARD
Opinions?
WORF
He is lying.
TROI
No. I think he's telling the truth.
He really DOESN'T have Wesley.
PICARD
Mm. Reopen channel. Commander
Targoff, we will assist you in your
search.
TARGOFF (VO)
(filtered)
No. We'll handle it. You'll get your
man back. You're obviously too
(MORE)
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT FOUR 11.
TARGOFF (VO) (Cont'd)
powerful for us. I'd like to...
apologize for attacking you. May I
come aboard your ship to do it in
person?
PICARD
(in disbelief)
Just how stupid do you think we are?
No, you may NOT come aboard. Return
my crewman with all haste, or face
reprisal. Picard out.
BEVERLY
And now?
PICARD
Now we wait. And hope that the Trahns
are not as barbaric as we've been
told.
FADE OUT.
END OF ACT FOUR.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT FIVE 12.
_A_C_T _F_I_V_E
FADE IN:
EXT. SPACE -- THE STARSEEKER
INT. HIDEOUT
Wesley, Allea, Ura, and several other Trahn leaders are gathered
around a table, looking at a map of the area around the
Starseeker's control room. Wesley is pointing at some corridors.
WESLEY
If we move in here and here, we'll cut
them off.
URA
There'll be so much confusion, they
won't know what's hitting them.
WESLEY
Yep.
ALLEA
Brilliant.
WESLEY
I play strategy games that are a lot
like this.
ALLEA
Just remember that we're dealing with
lives, not markers on a board. Ura,
how soon will we be ready?
URA
Very soon. We're just getting the
last of the guns from the guards.
YANNA, a young Trahn male just barely older than Wesley, bursts
into the room. He's carrying Wesley's hand phaser.
YANNA
Look what I have!
Wesley grabs the phaser from Yanna.
WESLEY
How'd you get that?
YANNA
It was in one of the councilmen's
cabins. I found it while I was
(MORE)
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT FIVE 13.
YANNA (Cont'd)
cleaning.
Allea dismisses Yanna, and he leaves.
URA
The fool! They'll have noticed that.
They probably even know we're about to
strike.
ALLEA
Then we have to do it now.
URA
But we're not fully armed...
ALLEA
We won't get another chance, Ura. Not
if they figure this out. Wesley, do
you agree?
WESLEY
I think so. And I know I'd rather
have this phaser on our side than
theirs.
URA
I still say we should wait.
ALLEA
But I am in command. We strike now.
Allea gets up and walks out the door. Wesley follows her. After
a moment, and not happily, Ura leaves as well.
INT. STARSEEKER -- CORRIDOR
This is a T intersection of two large corridors. We see ARMED
TRAHNS at both corners -- Wesley, Ura, and Allea are next to each
other on the near side. The camera moves to reveal that the side
passage is occupied by Targoff's Dulian BODYGUARDS. They are
standing on the near side of an octagonal doorway, which is open.
They are obviously ready for an attack -- their weapons are
raised. In the background, we hear gunfire -- the revolution is
happening.
ALLEA
(quietly, to Ura)
This is it. Once we're past this
door, we have them. Are we ready?
Ura nods.
Allea motions with her hand, and the Trahns pour into the side
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT FIVE 14.
passage, guns blazing. The Dulians react quickly, leaping to
cover on the other side of the doorway (crouching behind the
corners of the octagon.) One of them is hit by a Trahn as he
tries to take cover. The Dulians fire back, scoring lots of hits
-- the Trahns have no cover. But they keep coming. One of the
Dulians gets up and opens an access box, inside which are door
controls. He's shot down. The Trahns are almost at the door as
his partner hurriedly finishes the job...
The door, a thick metal bulkhead, slams shut. The Trahns stop.
Ura, Wesley, and Allea come around the corner to the head of the
crowd and look at the door.
URA
I told you this would happen. They'll
seal all the entrances now, and we'll
be stuck out here without any food...
WESLEY
Will you be quiet? I'm not done yet.
Wesley goes to the access box on this side of the bulkhead. It's
sealed shut, as he finds when he tries to open it.
URA
You can't unlock it.
(looks at his gun)
And it's too tough to shoot open.
WESLEY
No it isn't. Stand back.
The Trahns nearest the box comply as Wesley takes out the phaser
and blasts a hole in the front cover. Inside, we see that the
controls have been blasted apart as well, revealing wires
underneath.
URA
You melted the controls!
ALLEA
Let him work.
Wesley rips out some of the wiring. He tries putting two of the
wires together. There's a spark, but nothing happens. He tries
another two; they work, and the door opens.
There are several Dulian guards waiting inside. Wesley ducks
behind the corner of the doorway as the firing starts. We hear
gunplay, but we just see Wesley, crouched behind the doorway. He
would much rather be at a computer console than in the middle of
a firefight...
Then, abruptly, all the firing stops. Wesley looks up and sees
that the Trahns have won, though they've taken pretty heavy
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT FIVE 15.
losses.
ALLEA
Inside! Move!
The Trahns rush in. Wesley catches up with Allea.
ALLEA
Those were Targoff's bodyguards. He
wouldn't send them unless there was
nobody else left.
(a hint of glee)
We have them...
INT. STARSEEKER -- CONTROL ROOM
Computer consoles line the walls of this room. There's a large
viewscreen across from the main entrance; the Enterprise fills
the screen. Targoff is standing at one of the consoles, his
finger pressed down on one of the buttons. Some other Dulians
are watching him.
A hole appears in the door, and rapidly grows larger. We see
that Wesley is disintegrating it with his phaser.
Allea, Wesley, Ura, and some other Trahns rush in. They point
their guns at the Dulians, who step away from the controls and
raise their hands into the air.
ALLEA
Targoff, get away from those controls.
You know we've beaten you.
TARGOFF
(smiling)
Except... I've entered an overload
program into the engine control
systems. If I release this button
without entering the cancellation
command, in ten minutes the engines
will explode and take you with them.
Allea isn't happy about this.
TARGOFF
(the smile turns into a
grin)
Now. Put down your weapons, or I'll
kill you.
Allea starts to indicate that her people should comply, but
Wesley stops her.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT FIVE 16.
WESLEY
Ura, you know these controls, right?
URA
Yes, most of them. He's telling the
truth.
WESLEY
I don't care. Where's the
communications station?
Ura points it out. Wes walks over to the station. From behind
his back, we see him pressing some buttons.
WESLEY
Crusher to Riker.
INT. BRIDGE
Picard looks at Riker in surprise. Geordi is at his station.
RIKER
Riker here. What's going on over
there?
WESLEY (VO)
(filtered)
Targoff is threatening to overload the
engines and blow up the Starseeker.
If you don't hear from me in seven
minutes, slow the Starseeker down
until its engines shut off.
Riker and Picard exchange a look -- why is Wesley giving an
ORDER? After a moment, Picard nods.
RIKER
Seven minutes. All right.
WESLEY (VO)
(filtered)
Crusher out.
GEORDI
Captain, even if we shut off the
engines, they'll still have enough
power in their batteries to vaporize
themselves...
RIKER
I'm sure he knows that. Looks like
the poker lessons are paying off.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT FIVE 17.
INT. CONTROL ROOM
Targoff is still hovering over the button. Wesley turns away
from the communication station. He walks to a chair and sits
down. He faces Targoff.
WESLEY
Okay, let's do it. I want to see you
overload an engine that doesn't have
any power.
(smiles)
Targoff's resolve wavers. He stares at the Enterprise on the
viewscreen. Abruptly, he jerks his hand back from the button.
An alarm sounds until he angrily hits a quick sequence of buttons
at another console; then the control room is silent.
TARGOFF
All right. You win.
A couple of Trahns step forward and take Targoff's arms. They
bring him over to Allea.
ALLEA
Targoff. You don't know how often
I've wanted to put a gun to your head.
TARGOFF
We should have brought enough drugs
for all of you. You won't find us
easy to rule, Trahn.
ALLEA
(coldly)
You're right. I won't.
And with that, Allea lifts her gun and shoots Targoff.
ALLEA
That's for the curfews.
WESLEY
(standing)
Allea! Stop! You can't do this...
ALLEA
Take him.
(to the other Dulians)
All you. Over by that wall. NOW!
They comply. A couple of Trahn guards take Wesley's arms. One
of them confiscates his phaser.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT FIVE 18.
ALLEA
Get him off this ship. We're done
with him.
The guards lead Wesley through the blasted doorway. Wesley
shouts back to Allea as he's taken away.
WESLEY
I thought you were better than this.
You're just as bad as they are!
There's no sound for several seconds. Then we hear several guns
being fired inside the control room, and some bodies falling to
the floor.
FADE TO:
INT. CRUSHER QUARTERS
The lights are off. Wesley is sitting by a window, watching the
stars go past. He is obviously in a sour mood. Then the comm
system beeps.
GEORDI (VO)
(filtered)
Wes, there's a comm channel open for
you.
WESLEY
Tell 'em to leave a message with the
computer.
GEORDI (VO)
(filtered)
(beat)
It's Sonri.
Wes takes a deep breath, then gets up.
WESLEY
Okay, I'll take it in here.
He goes over to a desk, on which is a viewscreen, and hits a
button on the viewer control panel. Sonri's face appears. In
the background, we see that she's in her dorm room, at the
computer.
SONRI
(somber)
Hi, Wes. Geordi told me what
happened. Are you all right?
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT FIVE 19.
WESLEY
(shaking his head slowly)
I don't know...
(beat)
Why, Sonri? Why does stuff like this
happen? I was trying to help. I
thought I was setting them free.
SONRI
I can't tell you anything you haven't
heard a hundred times since you got
back.
WESLEY
I know. The Prime Directive. It's
just... Well, I really thought this
was different.
SONRI
So what happens now?
WESLEY
Well, Starfleet's sending a ship to
tow the Starseeker to an empty planet,
so they can colonize it. They're
going to establish diplomatic...
SONRI
I mean to you.
WESLEY
(nods -- he knew that)
They're putting together a board of
inquiry. I have to report to Starbase
Sixteen in three days. Commander
Riker thinks they'll go easy on me,
since this sort of thing has happened
before, but I'm not sure.
SONRI
What do you think they'll do?
WESLEY
I don't think they'll put me away or
anything. Maybe they'll send me to
the Academy for a while, to train me
for stuff like this.
(sighs)
But if this is the sort of thing I'm
going to have to live with, I'm not
sure I want to be in Starfleet.
SONRI
You won't do anything like this again.
It's over.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT FIVE 20.
WESLEY
Well, yeah, but...
SONRI
No. I know you, Wes. You've wanted
to be a Starfleet officer for as long
as I can remember. All the good
things you've told me about it are
still true...
WESLEY
Yeah. I guess so.
SONRI
Anyway, I have some good news for you.
I talked to Doctor Sontok for about
four hours after his lecture.
Wesley perks up.
WESLEY
Really?
SONRI
Wes, he was very impressed with our
field inversion theory. He even
worked on it with me for a little
while. Here, I'll send you what we
did...
She hits some buttons on her console. The word "Receiving"
appears at the bottom of Wesley's screen as Sonri talks, then
goes away.
SONRI
Anyway, take a look at that and tell
me what you think.
WESLEY
Okay! I'll look at it.
(serious again)
Sonri, thanks. I'm glad I have
someone to talk to.
SONRI
Me too, Wes. I'm glad someone out
there trusts me enough to talk about
stuff like this. It's so hard to find
someone I feel comfortable with.
(kidding)
Even if you are an alien...
WESLEY
Hey, I'm with Starfleet. That's never
stopped us before.
Steven Grimm / "Reins Of Power" - Rev. 6/10/90 - ACT FIVE 21.
SONRI
(raises her eyebrows)
I know.
Wesley grins.
EXT. SPACE -- THE ENTERPRISE
Flying away at warp speed.
FADE OUT.
END OF ACT FIVE.
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