109 lines
7.0 KiB
Plaintext
109 lines
7.0 KiB
Plaintext
___ ___ ___
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___|: |___|: \ ___|: \ DizDate: 12/95
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_______\___ \___ \___ ___\_______ WordCount: 1036
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«¬¬¬¬¬¬| |: | |____| ___|¬¬¬¬¬¬«
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«¬¬¬¬¬| | |: | |: |¬¬¬¬¬« Subject/Topic is on:
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«¬¬¬¬| |: | |: | |¬¬¬¬« [My "Modest Proposal" for ]
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----\___|: |\__ |\__ |---- [making learning more fun. ]
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`, e s s a y s ,` [ ]
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Grade Level: [ ]Grade School Type of Work: [x]Essay/Report/Term
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[x]High School [ ]Informational
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[ ]College [ ]Notes
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[ ]Misc
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ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ>ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ>ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ>Chop Here>ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ>ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ>ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ>ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ
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A Modest Proposal
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I am among the 850 people that attend Jesuit Prep. Each day at Jesuit
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Prep, we attend 8 grueling classes with 45 minutes of monotonous teaching
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about many subjects. Within each classroom, all the beady eyes of each
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student stare off into either space or the hanging clock on the opposite
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wall. As the 45 minutes tick away and the teacher rambles about a subject,
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the second and minute hand on the clock seem to slow down, then stop their
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rotational turns. While the clock appears to stop, often our heads droop
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down, at where we are sitting, till they reach a comfortable position upon
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our arms which we have placed across our desks. Once this repetitive
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classroom sequence of events happens, as is often the case within Jesuit
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Prep, we are swept away to our own mental classroom of deep sleep. This
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deep sleep is a common occurrence at Jesuit Prep. Yet, every time the
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teachers bore us to sleep, our future is hurt by our loss of vital
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information to help us continue through High School College. As humbly as
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I may, I propose to solve this problem and help the students of Jesuit Prep
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enjoy these classrooms of boredom. This proposal, deeply thought out to
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solve the common problem of students sleeping and hurting their future
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lives and careers is to place table top dancers in every classroom.
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I have worked out the details entailing the added cost of these daily
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dancing ladies. A well-known friend of mine, who owns a nightclub off of
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Harry Hines, was kind enough to divulge the rates per hour that dancers, he
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could find for Jesuit Prep, would accept. The amount I was told is $5.00
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per hour, ensured that this was a very generous deal by my friend. This
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meager hourly wage, times the 7 hours of school, times the 30 classrooms,
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and times the 180 class days of school equals approximately $200.00 added
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towards each student's tuition. Each student's tuition, currently at
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around $5,600 would be raised barely less than 4% to $5,800 per year. As
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you can see, the statistics have been thoroughly thought out, the next
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question is where to place these table-top dancers. Each classroom
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currently has at least one main desk towards the front of the classroom.
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Each day the desks are barely touched by teachers and people, as most
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teachers use portfolios or briefcases to carry their as nments and papers
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with themselves. The desks, therefore being unused, could serve as ample
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room for the dancers to take their position and dance throughout the
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period. As the administration and teachers understand the positive impact
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this creates in the learning curve, further enhancements may be made to
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include a metal pole, that can serve to aid the dancers, installed at the
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front corner of each room. A famous European friend of mine has
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implemented this method of teaching into his courses, with the metal poles,
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and continually praises this idea as an excellent way to transfer his daily
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information to his students. .
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This proposal, thought out in every respect, will influence more than
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just the students. Each dancer, by working all day, 5 days a week, is
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supplied with a steady job and is kept in the labor force earning a honest
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living. The dancers are also able to pick up spending money as cash is
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slipped to them by students during class, assuming the child has been
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paying attention to the lesson and the teacher allows it. The teachers
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will have their students awake and attentive during the period for lessons
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and information by offering private dances with the dancers if certain
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students behave correctly. As the students learn more information, based
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upon this rewarding classroom atmosphere, parents may become more confident
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in their child's college search process because of their improved grades.
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As the improved grades are returned, no doubt that the school pride and
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appreciation will increase as well. Everyone's self-esteem will rise, and
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support for other programs will grow.
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Although with all of these advantages, there are always people who can
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critique any well thought and laid out proposal. Myself, I can only think
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of 2 questions, which only the extremely judgmental person may come up in
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response to such a grand plan at solving such a problem. Firstly, that the
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cost of these table top dancers may seem rather steep. My only retort to
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that comment is that there is always a price for improving education,
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especially at this level and grand of scale. The children's education
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comes first in my mind though, and for myself, I would pay any price to
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make sure I am well taught and am well prepared for any future endeavors
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which I plan to proceed into. These dancers are of the highest quality,
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for the children deserve only that much. Secondly, a concern I did not
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initially think of due to its pure obscurity and the fact that with a
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proposal such as this, it is not of a major concern to most loving and
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caring parents with their children's' education in the refront of their
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minds. This concern is related to the dancers being used as sexual objects
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in front of their children. I would like to restate that these are dancers
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hand-picked, of the highest quality and have years of experience to back up
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their credentials. The dancers are hired only as a learning stimulus for
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the class, there is no intention of using these highly experienced ladies
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as sexual objects, for that would only insult themselves and their
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profession.
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With the major points addressed, it should be clear to you that my
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proposal has been thoroughly thought out and is unmatched, for nobody else
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has attempted to curb the learning in schools by such a proposal full of
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positive points, none of which are negative. I challenge anyone else to
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think up a more in depth proposal for a solution to boredom in Jesuit
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School. Until that time, I expect to see this proposal looked over
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earnestly by the top-administering school officials and placed into action
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as soon as it is agreed upon that this is a perfect solution to an ongoing
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problem.
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