316 lines
13 KiB
Plaintext
316 lines
13 KiB
Plaintext
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS AND THE NEO-PAGAN
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by: "the Bard"
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GODDESS: Grant me the SERENITY to accept the things I cannot change,
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the COURAGE to change the things I can,
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and the WISDOM to know the difference.....!
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-the Serenity Prayer
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*
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Aw, f**k it!
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-Serenity Prayer (short form)
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*
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(DISCLAIMER: the opinions in this article are my own, and should not, and
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must not, be taken as necessarily the opinions of AA as a whole. AA does
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NOT endorse ANY specific religious belief. To quote the standard definition:
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"AA is not allied with any sect, denomination, politics, organization or
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institution; does not wish to engage in any controversy, neither endorses or
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opposes any causes. Our primary purpose is to stay sober and help other
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alcoholics to achieve sobriety." GOT THAT?)
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*
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JUSTIFICATION 101
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Taoists say, "Shit happens."
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Buddhists say, "If shit happens, it's not really shit."
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Zen says, "What is the sound of shit happening?"
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Hindus say, "This shit happened before."
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Muslims say, "If shit happens, Allah wills it."
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Protestants say, "If shit happens, let it happen to someone else."
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Catholics say, "If shit happens, you deserve it."
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Fundies say, "If shit happens, the Devil did it!"
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Jews say, "Why does shit always happen to us?"
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Baha'is say, "If shit happens, it's a Spiritual Experience!"
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Wiccans say, "There's gotta be a pony in here someplace!"
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*
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Alcoholics don't take lovers...they take hostages.
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*
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"Hi! My name's "the Bard," and I'm a grateful alcoholic and Recovering
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Anglican."
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(Hi, Bard!)
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Now, for those lucky ones of you that are reading this who are -not-
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drunks.....maybe none of this applies to you, tho you could perhaps learn
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something from it. Just bear in mind that if you haven't "been there," then
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you don't truly understand what it's like. Try to bear with us; we're not
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finished yet...
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*
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Probably the best way to start is to talk about the Twelve Steps of
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AA....and comment on them from a Pagan point of view. Being Pagan doesn't
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make us any better that anyone else, but it does affect our view of the
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Universe. Being alcoholics, however, we will tend to do what every other
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alky does, and start logic-chopping and complicating even the simplest things
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into utterly unrecognizable impossibilties...and when we do -that- we can
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say to ourselves, "It's too hard for me. I can't do that."
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Keep it SIMPLE, stupid!
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A question to think about: To properly work magick, you must be in
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full possession of your faculties. You think you can work magick -drunk-?
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HAH! That's kinda like giving an armed nuke to a three-year old child.....
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Maybe it'll work out OK, and then again.......odds are pretty good that you'll
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get a BIG hole in the ground REAL soon!
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Another question to think about: do you wonder, sometimes, if you
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maybe -are- an alcoholic? Well, ole hoss, if you gotta wonder about it, then
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you probably are.......alcoholism is a DISEASE. It is -not- an immoral defect
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in you. It is NOT a "failing." It is simply a disease, and there is NO cure.
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There is, however, a way to recover from it. Read on!
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*
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STEP ONE: We admitted that we were powerless over alcohol - that our lives
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had become unmanageable.
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This one is pretty obvious, and doesn't need a lot of comment. It
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applies the same to the Fundie as it does to the Pagan. If you
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just can't handle alcohol, you just can't handle it. Period.
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STEP TWO: Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore
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us to sanity.
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What is the Goddess/God -but- a "power" greater than ourselves?
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There IS a "Higher Power." Call it what you will. Call it God,
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call it Goddess, call it Ralph, if you wanna, but it IS there,
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and surrendering your EGO to it is necessary for it to work.
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Brad Hicks said that "Nothing so chokes Magick as EGO," and he
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was right!
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STEP THREE: Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care
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of God, as we understood Him.
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Now, PAY ATTENTION! It says "as we understood.." Yeah, it says
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"God" and "Him." So what? This was written to reach out to people.
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Ya want it to say "Goddess" and "Her?" FINE! Say it that way to
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yourself. I know a guy that said "Ralph" and "It." Worked fine!
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-Don't- get hung up in semantics. You got an agenda, take it
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somewhere else. You bring it into AA, and you'll stay drunk.
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I notice that fella in the third row right is having problems with
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the semantics here...he's associating "God" (or "Higher Power")
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with that Big Fella with the Long White Beard that sits up in the
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Great White Throne of Judgement and writes down everything bad you
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do so He can punish you for it. I thought we had thrown out that
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concept of the Punishing God! We ain't talking Fundie here, boy!
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By "ego" I do not mean your free will. This you have. This you will
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always have. I mean surrendering that part of you that sits in the
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corner and screams defiance at an uncaring world. The "child-self,"
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if you will. "Child" is selfish, uncaring, and manipulative. These
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are things we need to recover -from-. "Child" will manipulate by many
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techniques, one of which being "people pleasing." (We need to recover
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from -that-, too.)
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Besides, if you are a practicing alky, your "will" consists mainly of
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finding a way to get drunk. Pbflth! That ain't "will." That's an
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addiction.
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STEP FOUR: Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
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OOPS! Here's a hard one! That icky buzzword "moral!" I hear a
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LOT from Wiccans about the differences between "morals" and
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"ethics." Frankly, if the actions/attitudes are harmful, then they
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can be called immoral/unethical. "An ye harm NONE, do what ye will."
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If your actions hurt someone, YOU need to realize it, and admit it.
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See the next step. Logic-chopping at this point will only get you
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into trouble. If you wanna read "ethics" for "morals," go right
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ahead....just be honest with yourself. As a practicing alky, you've
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lied to yourself long enough.
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STEP FIVE: Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the
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exact nature of our wrongs.
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So tell the Goddess (or Ralph) your problems with dealing with
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life, liberty and the pursuit of tapioca pudding. Tell it to
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yourself, too. GET A SPONSOR and talk to them about it. Pretty
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simple, really.
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STEP SIX: Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of
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character.
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Talk to your sponsor about this one. The Goddess (or Ralph) will
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do it, if you can get out from behind your own EGO long enough to
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let it happen....
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STEP SEVEN: Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
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Notice it says..."humbly." Contrary to the belief of -every-
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single alky I've ever known, we are NOT the Center Of The
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Universe.
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As amazing as it may sound, the Goddess runs the Multi-verse quite
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well on Her own. -You- can't even handle alcohol on your own, so
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what makes you think you can run the Multi-verse?
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STEP EIGHT: Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to
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make amends to them all.
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Yeah, I know, Karma has taken care of it. But that's on the level
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of the whole Multi-verse. Make your list. This helps you to admit
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to yourself (see the steps above) just where you were being a jerk.
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Notice also it says "...became willing..." This does not mean "made
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amends." It means you are WILLING, sincerely willing, to make those
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amends. Karma has already stomped on you, if you think about it, but
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for your own growth you MUST cop to this.
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STEP NINE: Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when
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to do so would injure them or others.
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This is pretty obvious, don't you think? You got questions about
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this, ask your sponsor.
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STEP TEN: Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong
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promptly admitted it.
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"I thought I had made a misteak once, but I was wrong."
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(Good epitaph for anyone who died drunk! You die drunk, you stay
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drunk next time around, until you get the message...you wanna do
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that, go right ahead. Call me when you become teachable.)
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It's always pretty hard to admit to making a mistake...Wiccans and
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other neo-Pagans are no different than anyone else about that one.
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STEP ELEVEN: Sought thru prayer and meditation to improve our conscious
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contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for
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knowledge of His Will for us and the power to carry that out.
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No problem here for Pagans, is there? I mean after all, isn't
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this exactly what we're trying to do in the first place? You
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ain't gonna do diddely-squat with magick without the Higher
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Power, anyway.....and this step is a doggone good lesson in
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what real magick -really- is all about. Think about it for a
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while.
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It is your Will that wants you to get sober. It is your EGO that
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keeps you drinking, along with the physical "allergy." Take that
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EGO, that spoiled child-self, and turn it over to the Goddess. Or
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Ralph.
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STEP TWELVE: Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps,
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we tried to carry this message to alcoholics and to practice
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these principles in all our affairs.
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So whattya think I'm -doing- here <grin>?
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*
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Just for funsies, let's look at those steps in -reverse-......
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***************************************************************
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THE 12 STEPS IN REVERSE
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SUCCESSFUL RULES FOR THE SELF-DESTRUCTION OF THE ALCOHOLIC
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1. I stated that I could handle liquor and/or drugs, and I was master
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of my fate.
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2. Firmly believed that I was entirely rational and sane in every
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respect.
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3. Made a decision to run my own life and be successful in all my
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undertakings.
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4. Made a searching and thorough inventory of my fellow man and found
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him wanting.
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5. Admitted to no one, including God and myself, that there was
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anything wrong with me.
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6. Sought through alcohol and/or drugs to overcome my responsibilities
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and escape the realities of life.
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7. Got drunk/stoned to remove these shortcomings.
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8. Made a list of all persons who had harmed me, whether imaginary or
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real, and swore to get even.
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9. Got even whenever possible, except when to do so would injure me.
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10. Continued to find fault with the world and with the people in it,
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and when I was right, promptly admitted it.
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11. Sought through conniving and hypocrisy to improve myself
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materially at the expense of my fellow man as I misunderstood him,
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asking only for the means to get and stay drunk or stoned and escape
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from reality.
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12. After having a complete moral, physical and financial breakdown, I
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tried to drag those who were dear to me down to my level, and to
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practice these reasonings in all my affairs.
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*******************************************************************
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Well?
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It may be that you are still a practicing alcoholic. You are still
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drinking and drugging and making everyone around you miserable. I won't
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preach to you. If that's what you want to do, then that's fine with me.
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That's -your- problem, not mine. I am dealing with -me-, today, not with
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you.
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When you hit bottom, whatever that may be to you, whether it is
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winding up in the drunk tank, or squatting in a corner with DT's, or
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being thrown thru the roof of a car at 65 MPH (and surviving it), or having
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blackouts, or losing everything you have, or, Goddess forbid, killing some
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one else with your car.....and the Goddess FINALLY gets your attention,
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then remember that AA is out there, and CAN help you.
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Call your local Central Office, and get the location, date and
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time of a meeting near you. If you need a ride to it, they'll be glad to
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help out. Get a copy of the Big Book, and read it.
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Go to meetings. Read the Big Book. You don't even have to -say-
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anything in meetings. Just sit there and listen for a while, if that's
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what you feel you need to do.....but GO TO THE DAMN MEETINGS!
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This is being published, initially, over BBSes. Your local BBS,
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if it is FIDONET, may carry the RECOVERY echo. It is available on the
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backbone, and can be brought in by your local SysOp. Ask for it. Read it.
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It's for -you-.
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*
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Blessed Be!
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Sober, one day at a time:
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-the Bard
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Yule, 1990 CE
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(end)
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