133 lines
5.6 KiB
Plaintext
133 lines
5.6 KiB
Plaintext
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The SubGeniusFoundation
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heals ruined members of
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a crumbling society!
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Here's What Just A Few Have To Say...
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"I haven't been so frightened since 1961. You're telling the
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truth, praise the Lord! Truly our only hope is REPENTANCE. I
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know there was something wrong with the Sun and Venus and
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now I have proof. Bless your work."
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"Suddenly it's GlRLS GlRLS GIRLS! Boy,your book Things to see
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and do is GREAT!"
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"My dad used to hide the pamphlets from me but now he
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makes me read them."
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"And I thought there was no such thing as a real aphrodisiac!"
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"I am in prison, I know I am the son of a preacher and all my boys
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can quote Scriptures. But why can't they let us have church in
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here? The real thing. I'm like Dobbs, I know, why won't they tell
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the people ahout the Pink Boys and the Illuminati? I was there in
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Burma in '38. I saw what they did with those electric machines.
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Some men here are sick in their hearts, I can't help them, the
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insects you talked about get inside me and well you know. Read
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Genesis 18:9,7, you get it. I'm sorry for what I did with those boys
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but when will AFFA let up?' GOD "BLESS" you MEN for
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fighting WITH LIGHT BEAMS. I'm all with you right here."
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"It was so reassuring to learn that my phobias and paranoias
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were so well founded. I thought I was going crazy."
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"I can see how it all fits together in one interlocking web now.
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The neighbors call me a right wing crank, but we know about the
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Conspiracy, don't we? Now I have something to fight against."
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"Thanks, "Bob." for straightening out my boy. I wish every
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father was so lucky."
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"My parents caught me with your book but I'll get another one
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and they'll be sorry."
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"I found my place in the world through DOBBS. I will obey
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DOBBS. DOBBS is all-one-faith-AMEN! From ten billion year
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old amoeba to giant-forebrain OverMan of White Stone Power
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Mind, all SLACK all DOBBS all ONE! OK! OK! Drink the
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eucharist with no-doz, wash off your tears, power blackouts
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signal UFOs in space, ALL-DOBBS-TRlUMPH in heaven hell
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and Safeway. BRING ALL THE CHILDREN a million and six
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negative ion generators, tump thc gravcn images, I SEE! I SEE!
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The work of forty five slave Pink Boys equals ONE SUBGENlUS
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equals SCARLET LOVE 666! SLACK SLACK OK"
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"The SubGenius... sees the divine hand in the incompre-
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hensible... events of this world... he she does not cower, but
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laughs... retrieving ritual objects from among the kitch and...
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effluvia of televisioid society... "Bob" knows... there would have
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to be a "Bob," else no God for his/her perceptions... receiving...
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the indwelling glory inside a stinking downtown Woolworth's,
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whilst the Conspiracy ads proclaim all is o.k... everything is what
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it appears to be... and above all, don't leave the theatre... The
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SubGenius will be found... behind the refreshment counter with
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"Bob"... alchemizing in... the snu age..."
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"My minister told me you were doing the Devil's work, and
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for a while I was afraid to join up. But our church burned down
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and God doesn't care, so why not? That's what I say. Here's my
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$10 and COUNT ME IN!"
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"I am in high school, and I guess you'd call me a 'brain.' A lot of
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the lumpen proletariat (kickers, jocks, freaks) give 'worms' like
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myself a difficult time. The fact that I'm overweight and have skin
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problems doesn't help, as you can imagine. But your philosophy
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"Fuck them if they can't take a joke"is just what I've needed.I use
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the secret SubGenius Subliminal "Jest" commands in my daily
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conversation, too, and I've lately noticed that many of the
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physical toughs who harass me are showing new respect even
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though they can't seem to flgure out why! I think you've helped
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me to instill some superstitious fear of higher intelligence into
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their dense crania!"
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"Your book really slapped me in the face with my own faults
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and bad habits. You're right, people like me are creeps. But yet,
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only your organization has had the courage to tell me that this is
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OK. It's what I needed to hear. Everything is fine now."
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"Since my wife died I have thought I was going crazy, or senile.
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Your material helps me deal with this and exploit my intermittent
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loss of mind. I'm 89 and I agree, let's have more SLACK! (The
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profanity I could do without but I understand, you have to reach
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the young people too.)"
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"I used to be all messed up on the Lord, but now I'm messed up
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on G'BroagFran. and it's just a better excuse altogether."
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"All of my hormones are now collected in one 17-inch
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LENGTH of my body."
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"I only spent one night with "Bob" but I'll never forget it as long
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as I live. No other man has ever done what he did."
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"I am "Bob's" Instrument of Death. "Bob" kills through me.
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My artwork is my own."
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"I want to hate you so much I will smash your plastic face your
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fucking teeth go squirting out your brains for breakfast I will get 1
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big sharp stick and hit you seven times til you bleed and poke your
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eyes out with a big crooked nail! I will stomp your holy pipe to
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shit and kick your god damned head off like a football rolling
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down the gutter splitting open like a rotten pumpkin and spilling
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seeds all over the world ! Will smear your stinking sacred name all
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over the street and vomit you to hell in a car crash you go burning
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upside down in jail your suspenders snap and your pants fall
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down! East raw gun poisen slimey pink ass shithead devil! Blam.
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BLAM BLAM BLAM! FUCK YOU! AHAHAHAHAH..."
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"You make it seem like a joke, but it really isn't is it? I feel I can
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read your mind while I'm reading it, it makes more sense between
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the lines than most books do right on the lines that are serious.
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Whew."
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JOIN THE CHURCH OF THE SUBGENIUS
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Cynisacreligion and a Society for Strange People.
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Details $1
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The SubGenius Foundation
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Box 140306, Dallas, TX 75214
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