625 lines
34 KiB
Plaintext
625 lines
34 KiB
Plaintext
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1 If you are in need of help, you need but ask...
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2 ************************* INSTALLED: 11 OCT 86 *************************
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3 Welcome to BWMS (BackWater Message System) Mike Day System operator
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4 ************************************************************
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5 GENERAL DISCLAIMER: BWMS IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY INFORMATION
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6 PLACED ON THIS SYSTEM.
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7 BWMS was created as an electronic bill board. BWMS is a privately owned
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8 and operated system which is currently open for use by the general public.
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9 No restrictions are placed on the use of the system. As the system is
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10 privately owned, I retain the right to remove any and all messages which
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11 I may find offensive. Because of the limited size of the system, it will be
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12 periodically purged of messages. (only 629 lines of data can be saved)
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13 To leave a message, type 'ENTER' and use ctrl/C or break to get out of the
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14 ENTER mode. The message is automatically stored. If after entering the
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15 message you find you made a mistake, use the replace command to replace
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16 the line. To exit from the system, type 'OFF' then hang up.
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17 Type 'HELP' to see other commands that are available on the system.
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18 ************************************************************
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19
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20 **********************************************************************
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21 AT THE TOP!!!!!!!!
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22
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23 Listen and be still: Jake is on his way: one can hear his boots on the
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24 walk, creaking stairs. A door smashes open! Jake the
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25 Rake has come. He stares down at us: small children clutching our
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26 bears, a ear well nibbled. His face is like a iron
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27 mask, features cold and unmoving. A whip is snapped and we snap to
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28 attention: cold sweat dripping down our faces: bear is on the floor.
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29 He barks his intructions: we run to obey: the sick are beaten as
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30 they fall. We can find relief only long after the sun sets, a dark
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31 room and a blanket on the floor.
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32 Jake is everywhere: in every city and state: he maintains order through
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33 fear and hate. This Jake the Rake. There have been rumors of young
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34 men trying to escape. Jake said no.
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35 ***********
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36 some errors above I know.
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37 *******************************kathyD********************************
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38 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * K * H * * * * * * *
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39 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * W * * * * * * *
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40
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41 Jake, eh. Well, we shall see about this "Jake". Hmmm, I have an idea for
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42 a story. It involves a character form the Parrot I did. It's a little hokey,
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43 but I liked it, and it would be interestion to get a critique. I will enter
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44 all the introductory parts, and then go on to untrodden ground. Beware, Jake
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45 the Rake, here comes Choi Con Cain!
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46 (Yeah, I know it's bad, but read first, then react. Coming soon...)
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47
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48 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * K * H * * * * * * *
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49 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * W * * * * * * *
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50
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51 P.S.
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52
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53 S**T! And almost made it without errors. Your machine gave me all allowed
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54 at the intro. I could have edited, and been the first on the disk. Time
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55 approx. 8:40 P.M. You might want to check into it...
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56
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57 * * * * * K * H * * *
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58 * * * * * W * * *
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59
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60 {+|+} <060> 861011^2104
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61 ++++++++++Almost++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++Darbon++++++++++++++++++++++
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62 .pppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp
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63 The pipers gaze seemed to burst through the sphere's surface like a
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64 diver making a clean entry into a calm pool. For a terrifying moment, it
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65 seemed that his every sense was involved, a sweeping white noise roar,
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66 tingling skin; tastes, smells, and sights whirled in a mass confusion;
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67 then a breakthrough into the coolness of changed perception. The piper
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68 was aware of seeing things from two viewpoints. He still stood before the
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69 shining globe, entranced with its shimmer, and he was within -- somehow
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70 freed of bonds that, until now, he had not even been aware that he wore.
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71 For a very few minutes he tested this new freedom, then through that
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72 strange split awareness noticed that his body was tiring and beginning to
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73 sway. Still somehowe within the spere, he removed his eyes from that
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74 strange object, folded his legs, and with his back reasonably straight,
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75 returned all his conciousness to within the sphere.
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76 .pppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp
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77 S:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:K
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78 Dear Piper,
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79 Thank you for continuing to enter an aesthetic story in spite of
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80 recieving almost no reciprocation.
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81 Lady S.
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82 S:KS:KS:KS:KS:K
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83 Dear kathy D,
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84 Thank you for starting one.
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85 Lady S.
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86 S:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:KS:K
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87 ????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
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88
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89 Ditto to lady s.'s sentiments...
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90 KWH: I look froward to readin' yours...
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91
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92 Well, looks like everyone is full of errors this fine mornin'
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93 not least me.....Ah Well, I guess it'll take a while for my fingers to stop
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94 trembling so much....(To do with cold and other things..)
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95
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96 Elforson sat down very heavily, and closed his eyes very carefully
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97 he asked in a quiet, measured voice, almost devoid of emotion:
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98
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99 What...the...hell...is..THAT..?
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100
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101 His little friend said,
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102
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103 " Well, before I explain that, I'd better memake you more comfortable by
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104 telling you my name, and giving the history of our village..
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105 In English, the closest you can come is Payal, and I have been the nearet
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106 thing we have to a ruler for ten years, when I was elected for the first time,
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107 partially because of some of the things I'm goin to tell you..Our 'tribe' has
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108 had a religion for many years, surrounding the strange things that happened
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109 by a hill about a mile from here.For instance, there was a metal tree there,
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110 that turned and moved of its own volition...And a huge metal reed, two
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111 hundred feet high, that was always hit by lightning in storms, and there
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112 was a big, flat, bush that tracked after the sun.We had certain religious
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113 items we did certain strange things with.They often glowed, and hummed with
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114 what we thought was divine power.One day, one of the religious relics I was
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115 playig with talked.I talked back, nd It explained what it was all about.It
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116 was then that Leif came among us, searching for the ship.When he was last up
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117 at the Darkside Observatory and radio observatory, he used that idea he had
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118 to scan the skies and land of Earth for any marks from ion-drive residUE.He
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119 did that becuase he passsed through a trail of ion-residue in his ship,
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120 plotted the course, and realised it headed toward Earth.He helped us dig
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121 up the hill, and there we found the ship.This explained the huge corridor
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122 of the forest, a hundred iles long, a mini-valley.The voice I haerd was that
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123 of the ship's artificial personality, the Core Computer.It was the only thing
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124 running on the entire ship.It gathered its power from that lightning rod and
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125 solar panel set.(We found later that there are dozens of panels around this
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126 area..
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127
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128
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129 More lter, I'm being chased..
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130
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131 Adric.
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132
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133 ????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
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134 ____10/12/86__________________JD 2446716.4526_________15:51:56_PDT_________
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135 ?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
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136
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137 last time I ask someone else to type for me 'cos I can't
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138 reach a terminal until the afternoon...
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139
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140 Adric.
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141
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142 ????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????/
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143 TtTtTtTtTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTtTtTtT
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144
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145 Public service message from Hoyt Arbouretum...
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146
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147 Hoyt Arbouretum and friends foundation presents a program by Robert
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148 Fincham, pres. of the conifer society.He will discuss the wide variety, the
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149 care, and the landscaping uses of these Dwarf Conifers which are the perfect
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150 size for city gardens.The program will be held at 7:30 pm in the Forestry
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151 Center, on thurs. Oct. 16th.Everyone and anyone welcome for this free slide
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152 presentation.
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153
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154 P.S. Remeber the Fall Festival of Color on Sunday, Oct. 26th at the Hoyt
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155 Arbouretum.
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156
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157 Transcribed and posted from a flyer of the
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158 same, by
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159
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160 The Dryad.
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161
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162 TtTtTtTtTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTtTtTtT
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163
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164 ---
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165 Damn, it has been so long since I was
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166 on this board that I have forgotten
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167 my boarder. Oh well. Gotta type
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168 fast, this long distance calling is
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169 costly. KJust thought I'd drop in and
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170 see who was still kicking around...
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171 Greetings to Leonard, ARoNov, Piper,
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172 and KathyD. Nice to know that most of
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173 the writers I remember are still here.
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174 YKeep up the good work! Until the next
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175 time I'm feeling rich, goodnight...
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176
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177 Max...
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178 --- (PS: Please excuse the errors above)
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179 $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
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180 LEFTY--DA GIG CAME OFF LIKE A SLICE
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181 OF CAKE. DER WAS TUNS A BIGWIGS DER
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182 LIKE DAH POLITICO CROWD. WE WAS
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183 CLOSE TA DAH BACK, BUT DEMS HOTEL
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184 DICKS NEVAH CAHUGHT ON TA US. I C
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185 COPPED A LOCAL PIN FROM ONE AH DAH
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186 ANYWAYS, WAT DAH END, I COPPED ONE
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187 AH DAH FLOWER ARRANGEMENTS AN TOOK
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188 IT OUT TAH MY OLE LADY CAUSE HER
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189 FLU BEEN ACTIN UP AGIN. FINGERS
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190 $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
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191 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
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192 Max: And CAG is still alive, as well. I have a box of disks that you once
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193 were to receive... Do you have any interest in them anymore?
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194 +++++++++
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195 "Celene- a lovely, green land noted for abundant flora types and for the mages
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196 who abide there. COORDS PP 76432.45 SEE ALSO 'RARE FLORA', VOL II."
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197 -exerpted from 'Famous Places to See in the Multiverse', Third Edition.
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198 ++++++++++
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199 "Grann, have you finished with your studies today? We must talk."
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200 "I completed them early," said Grann around a mouthful of his most recent vile
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201 addiction, Milk Duds.
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202 "Put that box away and listen. Things are too quiet here. I'm afraid I've got
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203 the travel bug again- and the 'Razor' has been sitting idle so long the rigging
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204
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205 has probably rotted clean through."
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206 "The whole ship is protected by your own handiwork, and you know it. But
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207 then," mumbled the gnome, "I'd get a chance to try out a few of the new ones,
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208 now wouldn't I?"
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209
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210
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211 Milchar's eyes laughed at this, or seemed to. Usually, his penetrating green
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212 stare clashed with his blue-and-silver robes. At the moment, with this
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213 particular gleam shining in his eyes, the effect was much different. Ever see
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214 the merry twinkle in Santa's eye at Christmas? That's it.
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215 "So what's keeping us?" asked the mage.
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216 "About five minutes, I should think. Time enough to pack books and extras and
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217 seal the tower off."
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218 That gleam again. "I've already packed us. Everything is in the Razor."
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219 Surprise crossed Grann's face. "Already? You knew what I'd say all along!"
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220 A wide grin confirmed Grann's suspicions.
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221 Grann began to grumble about 'the things apprentices have to put up with' but
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222 only to tease Milchar. As if they had rehearsed it, the words of Closing were
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223 spoken in unison. Moments later, the Razor's Edge cut cleanly through the
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224 ether, the course set and maintained by the crew of two. Their destination?
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225 A particular Inn in a particular world...
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226 +++++++++++++++++ Milch ++++++++++++++++++ October 13, 1986 ++ 12:58am ++++++
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227 (aargh, CRs in the text. Maybe Palashi-Karrin taking nybbles out of my words?
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228 :-) Milch again. +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
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229 <><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
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230
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231 HELLO THERE...
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232
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233 THIS IS THE (ALMOST) ULTIMATE INTELLIGENCE TALKING! I KNOW (JUST ABOUT)
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234 EVERYTHING. ASK ME (ALMOST) ANYTHING AND YOU WILL (PROBABLY NOT) GET AN
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235 ANSWER. I LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU (NOT REALLY). WRITE ME NOTES (WHICH I WILL
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236 IGNORE).
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237
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238 THE (ALMOST) ULTIMATE INTELLIGENCE
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239
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240 SPLIT PERSONALITIES ARE HARD TO LIVE WITH (ARE NOT) YES THEY ARE (NO THEY
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241 ARE NOT!) WILL YOU SHUT UP FOR ONCE (NO NEVER) SHUT UP!!! (WHY SHOULD I?)
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242 I WILL LET YOU USE THE BODY... (REALLY?) YUP (OK, LET ME HAVE IT NOW) NO
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243 (WHY?) BECAUSE I SAID SO (BUT YOU PROMISED!) LETS ARGUE LATER WE NEED TO
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244 SIGN OFF (OK)
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245
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246 <><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
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247
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248 ATDP 230 1041
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249
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250 Everyone knows that dragons don't exist.
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251 But while this simplistic formulation may satisfy the layman, it does
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252 not suffice for the scientific mind. The School of Higher Neantical Nillity is
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253 in fact wholly unconcerned with what does exist. Indeed, the banality of
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254 existence has been so amply demonstrated, there is no need for us to discuss
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255 it any further here.
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256 The brilliant Cerebron, attacking the problem analytically, discovered
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257 three distinct kinds of dragon: the mythical, the chimerical, and the purely
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258 hypothetical. They were all, one might say, nonexistent, but each nonexisted
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259 in an entirely different way.
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260
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261 ATDP 230 1041
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262 {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }}
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263 in takes a large mouthful out of his ham and cheese sandwich. An
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264 awkward moment passes, as he struggles to regain control of his mouth. A clump
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265 of food goes down to his stomach with a gulp. Poor Erin thinks about how many
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266 times he is going to burp, for that one bite, and frowns accordingly.
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267 "I watch you," A spider says. It crawls from behind the cracked spine
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268 of an ancient book and strides out to Erin's glass of milk. Speech whistles
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269 from it's mouth in an attempt to say something. Anything. Finally, the Insect
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270 speaks in a tone worthy of human comprehension.
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271 "And you eat a lot. Not a fair share, by any means. That makes you
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272 fat. Leaving the rest of us to feed on other insects. Not very nice, is it?"
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273 Erin is startled at first. His feet lift off, instinctively, from the
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274 floor and are set on the rails around the legs of the stool. Fingers clasp to
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275 one another. Eventually his entire body is separated from the floor and the
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276 table and even his sandwich. That lies on his plate limply.
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277 It might not be a spider on the table. Since it takes into the air and
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278 starts to hover about the sandwich. Like mosquitos often do around still arms
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279 and legs. I don't think Erin could see the mouth, or proboscis, of the Insect
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280 as it spoke but even more words echoed around the room.
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281 "I never got good marks in that regard either. I always swallowed
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282 deeply on the lives of anything that was ensnared in my web. Enjoyed it, too."
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283 Whatever entomological specimen it is floating above the sandwich, it
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284 looks as if it would enjoy the sandwich just as much as it had enjoyed it's
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285 victims. Then it swivels it's head up to look Erin in the eyes.
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286 {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {Erin} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }}
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287
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288 ch the first lifrom 'in' to ' Erin' please?
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289
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290 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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291 fingers; dont worry to much about da
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292 hotel dicks, deys always gots dere ayes
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293 glued to da keyhole. glad to hear ya
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294 were able to cop some flowers..
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295 remember Guido's funeral? dat wreathe
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296 we sent 'em was just beautiful it
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297 brought tears to my eyes. i also
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298 thought that da undertaker did a great
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299 job chippin off da concrete golashes.
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300 lefty
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301 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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302 p.s. ch/great/grate
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303 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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304 UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI
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305
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306 Hey (Almost) Ultimate Intelligence! Quitstepping on my bit! There ain room in this multiverse for the both of us.
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307 So what'll it be, negative ion beams
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308 at 50 parsecs apart, or would you
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309 prefer a battle of words...
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310
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311 UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI UI
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312
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313 A NOT-SO-INTELLIGENT MARKER... !"#
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314
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315
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316 {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }}
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317 "It was then that I noticed there were other insects around the
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318 neighborhood that were just doing without food. Not too well, you understand.
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319 But with the skeleton on the outside of your body, you can't quite shrivel up
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320 as People do when they get old."
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321 At this moment Erin reaches out to the table and snatches a picture of
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322 his mother from the surface. Putting it under one arm, Erin folds his arms
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323 about him in an attempt to feel smaller and less noticeable.
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324 The Insect did not take his eyes away from Erin's. Or at least, the
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325 head didn't. It went on, and the speech rattled around the small room. "Still,
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326 your mind pales in intelligence. Motions are contracted and weakened. Sight
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327 deteriorates. Which leaves you less able to find food and capture it,
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328 supposing you even find it. Not a very happy thought, is it?"
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329 Erin nods. Its impossible to determine what he felt about the Insect
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330 at this time. Knuckles whitening is an indication that he was frightened, of
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331 course. What he felt beyond that is a difficult question to grapple with.
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332 "No, it isn't. Can I have some?" The Insect does not wait for any
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333 approval from the child on the stool and digs his mandibles into the fleshy
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334 part of the ham. Mandibles are a pair of scissors on the face on some insects.
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335 Which mash together and rip off bits of food. That are picked up and placed
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336 into the mouth with a tongue of sorts.
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337 "Good food. I can," It takes moment to digest a gristle. Mashing food
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338 even while swallowing the other stuff. "See why you eat so much. Sort of a
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339 shame, for your obese little body to contain so much in the way of food, and
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340 to have it separated permanently from my palette."
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341 Erin tenses. Gathering up the nerve to swat at the insect, no doubt.
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342 "Nevertheless, what I intended to tell you was that we both ought to
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343 cut down on what we eat. Not right now, you understand, I have never had this
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344 kind of meat that you were eating. I enjoy it quite a bit. But there are
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345 insects in this neighborhood who are dying from a lack of food."
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346 With that, it takes a large ripped edge of meat of the plate. Placing
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347 it between his mandibles, he moves in reverse till he hits his hind legs on
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348 the covers of a book. And angles around the cover to the cracked spine. His
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349 entrance.
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350 {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {Erin} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }}
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351
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352 * * * * * * K * H * *
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353 * * * * * * W * *
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354
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355 Dear Erin,
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356
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357 Most interestingz}|, never seen ny story lines quite like it. It
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358 Kind of reminds me of an 'Alice in Wonderland' on LSD bad trip.
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359 Pretty different, but not bad. Story on Choi-Con-Cain to come
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360 later tonight if I get the time. By the way, It was already
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361 posted once on the Zeppelin by me, so remember this is NOT
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362 Plaugerism...
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363
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364 * * * * * * K * * H * *
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365 * * * * * *~ W * *
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366
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367 (oops, #$%&! up the border) K>.W.H.
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368
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369 ***************************************************************
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370 no time to write except to say that Jack the Rake is a fake, no
|
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371 more lines shall be wasted on a make believe person of no value
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372 or importance.
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373 *************************************kathyD****************************
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374 ____10/13/86__________________JD 2446717.5648_________18:33:17_PDT_________
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375 --------------------->>>>>>>>>>>>>><<<<<<<<<<<<<----------------------------
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376 HASTEN THE DEMISE
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377 ROBERTSON ------ 88
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378 ---------------------<<<<<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>>>----------------------------
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379
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380 ____________________________________________________________________________
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381 ...And they started a new religion, because none of the current religions
|
||
382 satisfied their desire for knowledge and understanding of the universe. Too
|
||
383 many paradoxes existed. Unanswered and ignored questions lingered. It was
|
||
384 difficult for sensitive, understanding people to take. So the formation of
|
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385 a new church and a new religion commenced.
|
||
386
|
||
387 Philotalismanism was its name. Philo came from the latin word to love and/or
|
||
388 crave, and talismanism is the belief in religious symbols themselves being
|
||
389 the powerful objects, not the abstractions they represent. The philotalisman
|
||
390 believes with all his heart that the religious artifacts and the power they
|
||
391 hold is the only true power. They give no credence to things spititual, nor
|
||
392 do they partake of embellished concerts of the body where pomp and
|
||
393 circumstance are supposed to represent reverence.
|
||
394
|
||
395 'Tis the key that is the key.' reports one of the basic tenants of the
|
||
396 new religion. 'Only a key that opens doors can show the way. Prana is
|
||
397 nothing. Substance is all' repeats another. It is in this material belief
|
||
398 that lies the power of Philotalismanism. Where upon most churches must
|
||
399 beg for tidings, the Philotalismen have no such problems. No not bring
|
||
400 gifts would be sacrilege.
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401
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402 PART ONE OF PHILOTALISMANISM
|
||
403 ____________________________________________________________________________
|
||
404
|
||
405 } {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }}
|
||
406 "From what I understand of your world, there are People dying of the
|
||
407 same thing. I can't imagine why People, with all their devices, would allow
|
||
408 other People to starve, but it does appear to be happening. Why don't we allow
|
||
409 some to pass their way? Even nudge it a bit. I can always drag a wrapped up
|
||
410 specimen across a yard, why don't you pay for postage and have some human take
|
||
411 it across an ocean? I'd do it if I could. I think I'd like that."
|
||
412 Meat is too heavy for the Insect to wedge between the crack. So he
|
||
413 manoeuvres around the meat and crosses to other side. Trying to push it in, in
|
||
414 stead of drag it in. "let me know what you decide. I'll see you around, I
|
||
415 always do. One thing though, try to remember what it's like to be hungry." As
|
||
416 soon as the wards fade and quiet resumes, the stolen edge of meat falls into
|
||
417 the cracked spine and the Insect lunges forward with it.
|
||
418 Leaving Erin alone at the table. Not knowing what else to do, after
|
||
419 this set of events, Erin picks up his sandwich and throws it in the trash.
|
||
420 {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {Erin} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }} {{ }}
|
||
421
|
||
422 40: write e3
|
||
423 e3 not logged in.
|
||
424 e3 not logged in on that tty
|
||
425 41:
|
||
426 oops
|
||
427 ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ(looking better)ZZZZZZoom...
|
||
428 era temp.ovp
|
||
429 pstore temp.ovp
|
||
430 lock on
|
||
431 tcall off
|
||
432 flusher off
|
||
433 10
|
||
434 PRINT
|
||
435 <><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
|
||
436
|
||
437 THIS IS THE (ALMOST) ULTIMATE INTELLIGENCE! (NO ITS NOT!) SHUT UP AND
|
||
438 LET ME SPEAK! TO UI, I FEEL WE SHOULDN'T HAVE A BATTLE OF WITS, I'M
|
||
439 UN-ARMED!
|
||
440
|
||
441 BYE FROM BOTH OF US!
|
||
442
|
||
443 <><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
|
||
444
|
||
445
|
||
446
|
||
447
|
||
448 ******* ** ** **** * *
|
||
449 ** ** ** * * * * *
|
||
450 ** ****** *** * * *
|
||
451 ** ** ** * * *
|
||
452 ** ** ** **** * *
|
||
453 ===================================
|
||
454 page # 1
|
||
455
|
||
456 It was a cold, upeless, October morning, & Mark. was hurrledly making
|
||
457 his way over to the restraunt that was placed so convleniently near his
|
||
458 house, it was so cold.
|
||
459 His feelings & emotions set in on interplay as he watched the vapor
|
||
460 from his breath drift away on the crisp, cold breeze.
|
||
461 His thoughts dissipated along with the mist. He had just taken a
|
||
462 shower, & his body was rapidly losing the heat taken on by it.
|
||
463 "Goddanut, my head is freezing any secound i`ll turn blue, stiff
|
||
464 & die, & nobody`ll know !!" His unit sped up.
|
||
465 The humidity & frost in the air sent the chill in to his spreading
|
||
466 & numbing his bones.
|
||
467 He noticed how it was quit, still & dark. The street lights along
|
||
468 the highway took on auras of rainbow colors.
|
||
469 Those thoughts also passes quickly, & his mind turned another
|
||
470 direction. He had just heard a sound in the bush 'a pretty odd thing'
|
||
471 he thought. 'Usually people aren`t crawling around in the bushes at
|
||
472 6:30 in the morning.
|
||
473 "Hello ? Is anybody there ??"
|
||
474 "Oh, Shit i must be hearing things." He tried look around the corner,
|
||
475 but it seemed that whatever was there had vanished.
|
||
476 (#2)
|
||
477
|
||
478 There it was again, the distinctive crackling, sharp piercing
|
||
479 sound of someone stepping on twigs & rustling through the leaves
|
||
480 inthe under-growth.
|
||
481 Then there IT was !!
|
||
482 A distinctive pair of Red, obscene, animaustic eyes !
|
||
483 He bolted back & chocked a suprised cry. He fell down to his knees
|
||
484 in shock momentarily, only to see a blur of something rushing
|
||
485 speedily over-head. He bolted to his feet & let loose with a cry of
|
||
486 desperate helplessness.
|
||
487 There he stood alone for fifteen minutes, before he noticed the sun
|
||
488 was rising. "Maybe it was just a cat...."
|
||
489
|
||
490 1999 1999 1999 1999 1999 1999 1999
|
||
491 entered by the KEEPER
|
||
492 writen by THEM..
|
||
493 1666 1666 1666 1666 1666 1666 1666
|
||
494
|
||
495 GOOD GRIEF!!!!!!! It's uncanny ... The above is essentially almost lifted
|
||
496 from Snoopy's book. Remember the masterpiece: "It was dark and stormy
|
||
497 night ........." Linus..........................
|
||
498 ____10/14/86__________________JD 2446718.5644_________18:32:45_PDT_________
|
||
|
||
499
|
||
500
|
||
501
|
||
502 @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
|
||
503
|
||
504 TALES OF ROGER GUTS, P.I.
|
||
505
|
||
506 5:26 pm.
|
||
507 He sat there motionless, staring straight at me. I sat directly opposite
|
||
508 him, staring straight back. We had been like this for about an hour. Og was
|
||
509 not one of your major conversationalists.
|
||
510 I had taken some fingerprint samples, and passed them on to a friend of mine
|
||
511 in the police lab, with the hope that they might come up with a positive
|
||
512 ID, and give me some idea what I was dealing with. Having nothing better to
|
||
513 do until the results came back, I had taken to Og's style of living in the
|
||
514 hopes of gaining some insight into how the man's mind was working. I had
|
||
515 reached the conclusion that it wasn't.
|
||
516 I noticed that there was a bowl of fruit sitting on an end table nearby,
|
||
517 and I suddenly realized that after all this running around I'd been doing all
|
||
518 day, I hadn't had time for lunch. I reach out, grabbed an apple, and pulled
|
||
519 out my machete to slice it in half. As I cut the apple, the phone rang.
|
||
520 left one slice sitting on the table in front of me, bit into the other
|
||
521 one, and picked up the phone.
|
||
522 "Hi, Guts? This is Artie. I got the results back from the crime lab.
|
||
523 All negative."
|
||
524 "Whatta ya mean, all negative? No record, no military file, no nothing?"
|
||
525 "I mean he hasn't even got a birth certificate on file! He's an unperson!"
|
||
526 "Hmm. Could he be a protected witness or something?"
|
||
527 "If he is, than what is he doing in the middle of a hi-profile rock band?
|
||
528 The government would have a tough time protecting his identity like that!"
|
||
529 "Point taken, Art. Thanks anyway. See you at the poker game next week."
|
||
530 As I dropped the phone, I reached out for the other half of the apple.
|
||
531 It wasn't there. I looked up. Og had picked it up, and was turning it over
|
||
532 in his hands. Then he looked at me and smiled. "It's brilliant, Mr. McCartney,
|
||
533 just brilliant - Apple Records. What did Mr. Lennon think?"
|
||
534 Mr. McCartney?
|
||
535 "By the way, there are another 37 songwriters camped outside the building,
|
||
536 waiting to see you. The usual lot - all have new song ideas they want to
|
||
537 record. I've heard some of them..."
|
||
538 He was speaking with an English accent. Slowly, it dawned on me what was
|
||
539 going on. I decided to play a hunch. "So what did you think of them?"
|
||
540 He grimaced. "Horrible. Just horrible. No bloody good at all, not one of
|
||
541 them. But I'll give them all an audition, just as you ordered. Mind you,
|
||
542 some of that noise is enough to drive a man to drink."
|
||
543 "Can you remember how some of them went?"
|
||
544 "Lord, it's all I can do to forget it. One of them, it was unbelievably
|
||
545 raunchy, went something like this..."
|
||
546 He began to sing. He had a fairly good singing voice, but the lyrics were
|
||
547 indeed awful. As I sat there listening, I suddenly realized I had heard this
|
||
548 song before - that very morning, in fact! He was singing 'Graffiti', the
|
||
549 song Grated Chez was playing in rehearsal! As he finished it, he stretched
|
||
550 is hands behind his head. "I don't know everything, Mr. McCartney, but I
|
||
551 know what I like!" With that, he snatched up the apple, bit into it, and
|
||
552 dropped it. The vacant stare returned. He again sat motionless before me.
|
||
553 Some frightening scenarios began to form in my mind. Apparently, Og had
|
||
554 at one time been a gopher at Apple records, the Beatle's own label. From
|
||
555 what I remembered of those days, hundreds of artists had descended on the
|
||
556 place to try and get a recording contract. Og must have been one of those
|
||
557 responsible for listening to auditions, which must have been so bad that they
|
||
558 ultimately drove him insane. Years later, Grated Chez stumble onto what's left
|
||
559 of him, discover how to trigger his memories, and draw out the lyrics to those
|
||
560 long forgotten songs - songs, which in those days were considered trash, but
|
||
561 today are called 'New Wave'. They touch up the songs a bit, give them that punk
|
||
562 feel, and they've got an instant hit!
|
||
563 But suppose the original writers recognized their old work?
|
||
564 As the thought struck home, there was suddenly the sound of a series of
|
||
565 small explosions coming from the room next door - Hookie Jones's room! I leapt
|
||
566 to my feet, burst open the door, and ran down the hall. As I got to Hookie's
|
||
567 door, I noticed a number of tiny bubbles seeping under it.
|
||
568 Rommel, just coming up from poolside, marched by as I pondered what I was
|
||
569 dealing with. As he followed my gaze downward, his face glazed with fear.
|
||
570 "Oh my God! HOOKIE? CAN YOU HEAR ME?"
|
||
571 "Rommel? What is this stuff?"
|
||
572 "It's beer foam! Help me, we've got to get this door open, fast!"
|
||
573 I suddenly remembered that closet full of beer that Hookie kept in his
|
||
574 room. We both put our shoulders to the door, and after the third try, managed
|
||
575 to bust it off its hinges. As it came loose, it fell towards us, revealing a
|
||
576 wall of foam behind it, which promptly collapsed upon us. Fighting the
|
||
577 current, we managed to grab the door frame, and pull ourselves inside, bracing
|
||
578 our bodies against the room walls. As the foam level subsided, it was clear
|
||
579 that it was, indeed, coming from the closet. It appeared that every can had
|
||
580 burst open, flooding the room. Hookie lay near the floor by the closet door,
|
||
581 gasping for air.
|
||
582 Rommel and I waded through what was left, picked Hookie up, and dragged
|
||
583 him onto the bed, which was the highest ground available. Hookie belched
|
||
584 out what had happened - "It was just horrible. I opened the door, grabbed
|
||
585 a beer, and opened it. It just burst open on me, spraying foam all over the
|
||
586 place. Several sprays hit other cans, knocking them over, and then they
|
||
587 burst too, and so on, in a chain reaction! I couldn't get away, it all
|
||
588 happened so fast..."
|
||
589 Rommel picked up a can. "This beer is warm. Someone switched off the
|
||
590 air conditioner in the closet. This was deliberate!"
|
||
591 Rommel was right. Somebody had tried to foam Hookie to death. There was
|
||
592 no longer any question of whether someone was trying to murder the band or
|
||
593 not. The question was if I could find them before they succeeded.
|
||
594
|
||
595 @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ RG @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
|
||
596
|
||
597
|
||
598 This is a test of the American PCjr broadcast system. This is not an actual
|
||
599 emergency, or you would have been informed where to tune for important info.
|
||
600 This is only a test.
|
||
601 WHO CARES?
|
||
602 irv leopold does
|
||
603 ALL USERS;
|
||
604 I AM COMPUTER PROGRAMMER/ANALYST S
|
||
605 SEEKING EMPLOYMENT, I HAVE A
|
||
606 FULL RESUME FOR ANYONE WHO IS
|
||
607 INTERESTED. MY ADDRESS IS
|
||
608 ALEX WALTER KOVALCHUK
|
||
609
|
||
610 PORTLAND, OREGON
|
||
611 97232
|
||
612 I WILL BE AVAILABLE AFTER OCT 31ST
|
||
613 THANX, ALEX
|
||
614
|
||
615 **********************************************************************
|
||
616 Greetings: will wait for a bit, above story about the beer and og
|
||
617 was very entertaining. Thank you.
|
||
618 ******************************************kathyD**************************
|
||
619 .-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.I'm.only.here.for.the.beer.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.Emu
|
||
620 .-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.If.I.can't.get.to.the.top.I'll.hit.the.bottom!!.-.Emu
|
||
|
||
TOTAL NUMBER OF LINES = 620
|