233 lines
9.1 KiB
Plaintext
233 lines
9.1 KiB
Plaintext
---------------------------(w0ol #5: no comprende?)----------------------------
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hola, buenos dias, ese w0ol esta numero cinco. ese w0ol esta en espanol.
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no comprende? bece me culo, cabaza de mierde.
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ok, w0ol #5, hmm.. nothing is as graceful as a dot...........................
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.................................. <click> *BANG* *BANG* ok. dots are
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bad.. anyway on to something you do not know
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-----------------------(late night show wars)-------------------------------
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you sat back
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you thought they were over
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you were wrong. (well ovbiously)
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thats right
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the w0ol show.
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ok, i lied, the w0ol show isnt a late night show, but it IS a daytime
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talk show, and a very good one i might add.. ok, here is how it works..
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you all know how boring and stupid daytime talk shows are, basically a
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bunch of people gather in a room with a few freaks on a stage and the
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freaks are in some sort of argument, the nice, caring, supprotive (jock
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strap?) audience, being such good humans, support the freaks and they
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resolve their problems with eachother, then the audience shuns them all
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because well, theyre freaks. ok, so here is how the w0ol show works..
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flowchart time
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tickets are sold: 200 seats, 208 tickets
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people arrive
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early people the late-eight
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audience seats boxes (*)--------\
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watch people be tortured put in box with gun \
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clap, support, jockstrap like behaviour are tortured \
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leave kill themselves in anguish |
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special 2 person box
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* = hot girls who want any op on #w0ol or #y0lk
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as you can see this show would make for GREAT entertainment, and also
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provide education on whips/chains/knives/guns/hot embers/papercuts &
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vinegar/ect, which would help our young and still naieve society.. ok,
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simply put, it would rule as a show, it would get good ratings, and
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everyone involved excluding the torture victims would have fun and earn
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tons of money... on to another theory
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------(w0ol theorum #1: cherry coke contains anti-depressant drugs)---------
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ok, first off id like to say im sorry for saying "theorum" but its the
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only word for that type of think... ok, here, there are steps for this,
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so prepare to get up, print this, and bring it around a bit... ok, here
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you go: walk somewhere that sells/you can steal cherry coke, buy/steal
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one, walk home(optional), ok, look at the bottle, pretty fucked up ehh?
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cherry's mixed with coke? gotta be drugged, ok, go somewhere and get
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depressed, ie: if you suck at football go play a football game with the
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jocks and then realize that football is the most important thing in life
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and that you really suck in it, this should depress you, ok, open the
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bottle, drink it all, you go from waaah to YEAH!@!#!# in like 30 seconds,
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druggery again, ok, so we have now 2 forms of proof that cherry coke has
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drugs in it, now, for our last one flip it over and look on the back
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under ingredients
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INGREDIENTS: Lucrosesodamathyle, Orange-falvor, Terrorist
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Semen, Octenathane Foglyceride, Dantanothl, Raid-bug-spray,
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Un-saturator-filling, Gas, Stuff
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now take the first letter from each of these ingredients... LOTS OF
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DRUGS, its a sEcReT message, dont tell anyone, cherry coke has lots of
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drugs in it, now that youve read that go buy some, i always do when im
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depressed
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--------------------------(barney)------------------------------------------
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Barney's log: fartdate 230.35.54.666
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Voice Capture:
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hell, o, this is barney, eye am stationed outside the famed "kid mall"
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where many kids are playing, my mission today is to bring the kids under
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the so-called barney-trance and lure them to toy stores, please not i am
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satan
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Barney's log: fartdate 230.35.54.668
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Voice Capture:
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hello, we have infultrated the base and made many of the kids assume
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strange sexual posi..... i mean we have induced a large case of
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barney-trance, and have lured many kids to toy stores where
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approximately 8240 purchase have been made.. we have also started a new
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line of <clang> <door opening>
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Baby Bop: oh my barney! i didnt know you had two tails!
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Barney: good god!@ TURN AROUND
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Baby Bop: why are you petting that one? does it hurt
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<barney kicks him out and locks the door>
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where was i? ah yes, we have a new line of barney toys en route to this
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station and we soon hope to have them all under our control
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this is sata.. i mean barney signing off
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Barney's log: fartdate 230.35.54.666
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Voice Capture:
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we have seized control of the base and everyone is under our control,
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time to move on to earth.. muah ah ah ahahha!
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goodbye, from satan.. i mean barney of course, that was a simple error
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------------------------(scare-a-delic)-----------------------------------
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yeah i know, he must be stopped, and here is how, the super eleet plans
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to the barney bomb:
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.--. .-----------------------.
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. ' ` <| `'--'` | / pin to set it off
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. . ' <<| BOMB STUFF--CIRCUT----
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' . <| .,--,. |
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`--' `-----------------------'
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/ firey stuff to propel it
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this will land on barney, if you aim it correctly, it should kill him,
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mabey even baby bop, go build one and ship it to me.
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------------(empty folder)-----------------------------------------------
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shame on you macintosh
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naming you new folders "empty folder"
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sure they're empty for a while, but soon they fill up, well FUCK YOU!@
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thatl teach you to label things and expect everything to be the way it
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always was, well the world changes, people change, and right now, i have
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to change my underwear
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----------------------(gruesom)----------------------------------------
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hey dont look
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------------------(you going yet?)-------------------------------------
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yeah i think my creativity is used for the week
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hmm
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---------------------(shhh nobody tell him about the ascii)------------
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oh well i guess thats a rap
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but i feel kind of like im missing something, could it be? OOhhhhhhhhh
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yeah, ascii time
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-------------(UGH, well, draw something reasonable)--------------------
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today i will draw for you.. ugh.. ive drawn everything on my desk
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already.. hmmm.. ill draw.. a nifty-q dollar bill..
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.-----------------------------------------------------.
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| . .-. . . .-. . |
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| ` `- | ' _._ ` `- | ' |
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| `, `. ,' .|'` `'|. `, `. ,' |
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| || oOo. || |
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| .| []-[]o. |. |
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| .-. || | | | || .-. |
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| `- | .| \---/ |. `- | |
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| `. || || `. |
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`-----------------------------------------------------'
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that took me hours.. ok, print that out, snipit to size, and buy food
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counterfitting is cool
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hmmm, ok, hmm what else, whats good...yeah..mmm...batteries?
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.-.
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|~' + `~|
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| d |
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| u |
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| a |
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| hell- |
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|_______|
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the positive end of that battery looks a lot like a breast, im proud
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speaking of which
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.-.
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/o-/-\__-~' `~~-__-~'`------------'|
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<_____---.______-_.--___.-----------_-'
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hey everyone, theres a girl with huge breasts and NO ARMS!#!^% quick!@
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get her!@!
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ok, anyway, hmm. lastly, id like to draw you something i see all the time
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.-----------------------.
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/ /~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~\ \
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/ / . . . . . . . . . . . . \ \
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/ / . . . . . . . . . . . . . . \ \
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\ \ . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . / /
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\ \___________________________/ /
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`-----------------------------'
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its a port of a sort
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w0ol
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ok i end now
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oh yeah
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if you see these people kill them:
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hansolo
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firewalker
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w0ol to that
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-----------------------------(the end)------------------------------------
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finally.
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---------------------------+ eDiToR CoMmEnT +----------------------------------
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no.
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---------------------------------+ InDeX +------------------------------------
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this is so you can find them:
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#1: w0ol comes from sheep! (nettle)
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#2: the electric santa (nettle)
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#3: gourmet food, gourmet boredom (nettle)
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#4: toast some pixie stix in the hour that doesnt exist (nettle)
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#5: no comprende? (nettle)
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wow
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-------------------------------+ people of w0ol +------------------------------
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nettle
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(thats all right now.. so write sumfin!#)
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_ email addresses _~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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nettle:
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nettle@novasys.com
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nettle@nevermind.lag.novasys.com
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nettle@nexxus.novasys.com
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thats it..
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