155 lines
6.4 KiB
Plaintext
155 lines
6.4 KiB
Plaintext
-------[ w0ol #4: Toast some pixie stix in the hour that doesnt exits ]-------
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`~-_############b d############_-~'
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`~-_#########b d#########_-~'
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`~-_######b d######_-~'
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`~-_###b db d###_-~'
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`~-_bd##bd_-~' 0ol
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` `' '
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ok, down to buisness, im gonna teach you how to have the perfect relationship
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with a toaster. oh yeah. ok, there are steps..
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---------------------------[ steps, baby ]------------------------------------
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.-----------------Warning--------------------.
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| eye yam not responsible for anyone burning |
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| off their wierner or being damaged, or |
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| losing functionality of their toaster. |
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`--------------------------------------------'
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heres the steps, first, push down on the plunger thingy, like so..
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\/.-----------. .-----------.
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=| | \/| |
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`-=-------=-' `-=-------=-'
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you should hear a click, and the red hot things are gonna light up
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ok, next.. insertion, ok, you know.. blah blah, do whateever feels natural
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for you, or whatever, then like, here are my recommendations:
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withdraw before you ejactulate/get burned, this is probably a good idea to
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avoid a nationwide problem.. toaster pregnancy.. thats right, what are you
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gonna say when the toaster starts getting fat, or when it eats a slice of
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toast, what are you gonna say when your mom asks, "how did the toaster get
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pregnant?!" ok, but dont use condoms, it gets burned up and could stick to
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you painfully.. ok.. one last thing, Toaster Rejection. 704573R R3J3C7!0N,
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however you want to put it, its when your toaster pops you out before you
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are ready, well there are solutions, get another toaster, or set the timer
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for longer
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--------------------------------[ y0u 4r3 s!ck ]------------------------------
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yep. ok, on to PIXIE STIX!@!# they rule!@!@#!# there are three catagories
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thigns that rule can be put in.. sexual, games, or drugs, and im not sure
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where pixie stix go
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drugs: sugary enough to be regulated
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sex: hey, they make you hyper
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games: be creative, im sure you could make a game such as "superinhale" or
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sumfin, ok, anyway, so they rool, if youe never see a pixie stick here is a
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handy diagram...
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rocket fuel sugar
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/ substance
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.---------------------------------------------/--------.
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`------------------------------------------------------'
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\
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\ outer (protective)
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shell..
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ok, w0ol, and now..
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------------------[ now its like an hour later than before ]------------------
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damn right, if you didnt notice, one hour was deleted, ie: if you "sprang
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forward" at 7, then 8:01, 8:02, 8:03, 8:04, 8:05, 8:06, 8:07, 8:08, 8:09,
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8:10, 8:11, 8:12, 8:13, 8:14, 8:15, 8:16, 8:17, 8:18, 8:19, 8:20, 8:21,
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8:22, 8:23, 8:24, 8:25, 8:26, 8:27, 8:28, 8:29, 8:30, 8:31, 8:32, 8:33,
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8:34, 8:35, 8:36, 8:37, 8:38, 8:39, 8:40, 8:41, 8:42, 8:43, 8:44, 8:45,
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8:46, 8:47, 8:48, 8:49, 8:50, 8:51, 8:52, 8:53, 8:54, 8:55, 8:56, 8:57
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8:58, and 8:59 where MISSING!@#!# it sucked, but one less hour at my dads
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ugh, ok, it was nutty, 7:59 then bam, 9:00, it hurt me, ok, hmm.. time for..
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--------------------[ yay!@ bad ASCII art time!$@#!$ ]------------------------
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ok, im drawing something, ill draw, uhhhh ill draw, my telephone!@
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.------------------------------------.
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| .-. .-. |
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| ,| |________________| |, |
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`------'| |----------------| |`------'
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| .-. .-. .-. |
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| |1| |2| |3| |
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| `-' `-' `-' |
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| .-. .-. .-. |
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| |4| |5| |6| |
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| `-' `-' `-' |
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| .-. .-. .-. |
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| |7| |8| |9| |
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| `-' `-' `-' |
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`--------------------'
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i know there are OTHER keys, but do you want the phone to look COMPLETLY
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wacky? i didnt think so...
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.--------------------.
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| .------------. |
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| | w0ol | |
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| `------------' |
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| .-. .-. .-. |
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| |7| |8| |9| |
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| `-' `-' `-' |
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| .-. .-. .-. |
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| |4| |5| |6| |
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| `-' `-' `-' |
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| .-. .-. .-. |
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| |1| |2| |3| |
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| `-' `-' `-' |
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`--------------------'
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yet again more keys, i know...
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see something different about the key arrangments? the numbers?
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fucked up ehh? ok, teaches you a lession, well, anyway, ok, since youve
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probably never seen a disk in your life let me illustrate..
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may be filled
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.\--------------------.
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| \-. .-. |
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| `-'.----------.`-' |
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| | w0ol stf | |
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| `----------' |
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| .-------------. |
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| | .-. | |
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| | | | | |
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\___|_________|_|_|___|
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ok uh, heh, the end..
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---------------------------+ eDiToR CoMmEnT +----------------------------------
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wow, long article
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---------------------------------+ InDeX +------------------------------------
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this is so you can find them:
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#1: w0ol comes from sheep! (nettle)
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#2: the electric santa (nettle)
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#3: gourmet food, gourmet boredom (nettle)
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#4: toast some pixie stix in the hour that doesnt exist (nettle)
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wow
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-------------------------------+ people of w0ol +------------------------------
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nettle
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(thats all right now.. so write sumfin!#)
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_ email addresses _~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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nettle:
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nettle@novasys.com
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nettle@nevermind.lag.novasys.com
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nettle@nexxus.novasys.com
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thats it..
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