196 lines
12 KiB
Plaintext
196 lines
12 KiB
Plaintext
ÉÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍËÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ»
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º º º
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º ÛÛ ÛÛ ÜÛÛÛÛÜ ÜÛÛÛÛÛÛÜ º Vaginal and Anal Secretions Newsletter º
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º ÛÛ ÛÛ ÛÛß ßÛÛ ÛÛ ßß º º
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º ÛÛ ÛÛ ÛÛÜÜÜÜÛÛ ßÛÛÛÛÛÛÜ º Issue #110 - 8/16/1995 º
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º ßÛÛÜÜÛÛß ÛÛßßßßÛÛ ÜÜ ÛÛ º º
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º ßÛÛß ÛÛ ÛÛ ßÛÛÛÛÛÛß º -[ Written By: Mogel ]-º
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º º º
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ÇÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÐÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄĶ
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º Suicide in Style º
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ÈÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍͼ
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Okay, so all my life I've been waking up in a cold sweat having
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dreams that one day I could actually write for VaS!! That day has finally
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come that I can unite with the RaDest guys on 'da scene. Now don't doubt me,
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YES I can be as obnoxious and ignorant as them! Really I can!! Fuck the
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homos, fuck the blacks, fuck the jews, fuck anything that is or isn't me!!
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You ALL suck and VaS kicks everyone and everything's ass.
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With that out of the way, I'll begin the file. This file is not
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about the lates way to get ]<0d3z or the gNu |-|4C/<iNG 4 (_)NiX, no this
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file is for those of you with miserable, fucked up lives and you want to kill
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yourself. I have compiled several methods that you should employ in
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commiting suicide. Remember one thing here, don't be boring. Get dangerous.
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Get exciting. How many stupid suicides have you seen or heard about in your
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life?? I'll say it once and I'll say it again(huh?): If you're going to kill
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yourself then why not do something meaningful while you do it???
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Okay, the first thing that must be done is you must thourghly convice
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yourself that you do, in fact, want to die. That part is easy...just look
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at your pathetic life. Reflect on it. Need help still? Fine. Chant these
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words to yourself: "I am a loser. I spend every waking minute on a BBS.
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I have no girlfriend. I'm ugly. I smell bad. My mom is a bitch. No one
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loves me. I have no real friends. I have no real talents. I'm worthless."
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That should just about do it. If not, then just watch the Weather channel
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for about 5 minutes (15 if you can take it) and that should finish the job.
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The next part is the fun part that all suicide people should have...
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of coarse! The suicide note!! What could make a suicide with out the
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suicide note?! Now you can take the Kobain method and write a lame reason
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for killing yourself (such as feeling like shit, having a worthless life),
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but let me suggest a few methods...first the funny method. What better way
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to end your life than with something that will make your loved ones laugh out
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loud? Because I'm so Elite, I have included a few examples:
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___________________________________________
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| |
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| t0 wh0m iT M4y K0nS3rN, |
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| bY tH3 tiM3 Y0u r34d tHiZ n0t3 i Wi11 |
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| h4v3 hUnG mYs31f bY /x\y K4b3l 0f mY |
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| m0d3M. y0u m4Y b3 aZkiNg "\x/|-|y dID |
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| h3 d0 iT?" w311, |
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| i DiD iT iN tH3 n4M3 0v |
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| W4r3ZZzzZZZzzZ!!!!!1!!1! |
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| p.i.s.s. |
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| m4/<3 sUr3 tH4t mY B04R|> |
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| St4Yz a 0-3 d4y ZiT3!!!11!!1 |
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|___________________________________________|
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_______________________________________________
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| Dear Mom, |
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| I'm a little tea pot short |
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| and stout. Here is my penis, here is my |
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| spout. There once was a lady named Venus |
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| whose body was shaped like a Venus flytrap |
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| Remember the alamo? Where's my liver? |
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| I'm melting...I'm melting. I wish, I wish, |
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| I wish I was a fish. Mom I think I love |
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| you won't you tell me your name. Haha, |
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| tricked you that's a line from a song. |
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| I like to call Mogel's board at 2157323413. |
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| Well, at least now you know where Dad's |
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| shotgun went to. I really don't have too |
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| much to say now that I'm dead. Oh yeah, I |
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| wanted to mention that I always hated our |
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| family outings to the forest. Uncle Jack |
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| with nachos and big farts and always hearing |
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| you and dad scream as you were having sex in |
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| tent next door. Please engrave "I'm Coming" |
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| on my grave stone and best wishes to you. |
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| I did it for Drano. Please excuse the Mogel |
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| Plug, Goodbye.... |
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|_______________________________________________|
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Another more affective note technique is to be an asshole. You need
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to gather up all that anger and let it loose in a flame note. Observe:
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___________________________________________________
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| YOU MONEY GRUBBING SACK OF SHIT! I AM SO |
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| FUCKING SICK AND TIRED OF YOU AND THIS LIFE |
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| AND THIS WORLD AND YOUR PLACE IN IT. HERE |
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| LIES MY MOTHERFUCKING BODY, ASSHOLE. YOU |
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| WANNA KNOW WHY I'M HERE?! I'M HERE BECAUSE |
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| YOU FUCKING PUT ME HERE! THAT'S RIGHT! IT'S |
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| YOUR FAULT!! I COMMITED SUICIDE BECAUSE OF |
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| YOU!! NO MATTER WHAT YOUR FRIENDS WILL TRY TO |
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| TELL YOU, I SLIT MY WRIST BECAUSE BLEEDING TO |
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| DEATH WAS MORE FUN THAN LIVING WITH YOU. YOU |
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| BITCH! YOU KILLED ME. |
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|___________________________________________________|
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This letter is the best kind. It's great fun to die knowing you
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have put a kind of guilt on a person that they will never forget. Hey, you
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might even get them to commit suicide too. But no way will their letter be
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better than yours(unless they were reading this great text file).. their's
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will say something like "..i just couldn't live with myself..." That wollows
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in lamity compared to yours, huh?
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The next thing I'm going to discuss is the actual methods you can
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commit suicide. This first part is the list of old, been-done, stupid things
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that only lame suicide people do.
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Suicide For Losers:
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------------------
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1) Hanging yourself
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2) Slitting your wrists
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3) Shooting yourself
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4) Stabbing yourself
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5) Jumping off a building
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6) Going into the bathtub with a toaster
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7) Overdosing on something
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/<oo1 Suicide:
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--------------
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1] METHOD ONE: The Sports Bomb.
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I've always been a strict believer in the philosophy that if you're
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gonna go, you should take as many innocent people with you as possible.
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Enter: The Sports Arena. That's right, either that or a Concert. Any
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place where you can get real close to as many people as possible. Then all
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you do is bring a grenade, a bomb, or some explosive...either stapped across
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your body or hidden away....and here's the kicker: YOU JUST BLOW UP WITH
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THEM. That's right, don't like whip it out and say "This is for Allah" or
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any shit like that...then people will all run away and that would suck. No,
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the best thing to do is just go boom.
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I'm not going into specific on how to make any bombs... you want to
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get technical shit? Read Phrack or something. Besides, you should all be
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313+3 enough to make a bomb dammit.
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2] METHOD TWO: Rape Spree.
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You are about to die. So why the fuck can't you do something that
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you've always wanted to do?? Remember that girl and school with the really
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big tits that ignored you?! I think it's about time you concocked a really
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intricate plan to GET her...after all, isn't she one of the reasons your
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doing this? That's right! Okay, what you need to is have prepared
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handcuffs, ropes, chains, anything that you can tie her down with...Now
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the part that you are on your own with is getting alone with her in some
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deserted place...(No, Your Uncle Moggie wouldn't leave ya' without ANY
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tips! Here's one.. pick some deserted place somewhere and then run up to
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her and tell her that her boyfriend is making our "BIG TIME" with some
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chick (it would be wise to pick some bitch she would be envious of) at that
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location. Then just accompany her there and your are home free. Make
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sure it's a deserted place, and make sure you have your matierals either
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with you or planted at the site. Remember a gag. Also, you could brush up
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on your raping skills in the VaS "How to Rape" files. Anyway, fuck her
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good and plenty. Make sure you cup a really big feel...do it for me...or
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better yet, do it for VaS! Then you kill yourself. Make sure you don't
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get too excited and kill her too.. remember it's important to leave
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permanent psychological scars on the people you leave behind!
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3] Method Three: Public Assholes
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This is the most important one in my opinion. Since you are going to
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just up and murder yourself, why don't you do something useful for humanity
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before you fucking just up and leave?! Don't be a selfish jH00! Do you
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know how many motherfucking asshole politicians there are in this goddam
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Capitalistim motherfucking bullshit government we have?!? Do you know how
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many annoying ignorant obnoxious egocentric relegious leaders we have?! Do
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you know how many money hungry self-centered entertainers are out there?!
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That says it all. KILL ONE OF THEM!! Don't leave without taking out of
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them with you or your a pathetic loser that did nothing with your
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meaningless life. I know if I was gonna go, I would take the Power Rangers
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with me!
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In conclusion, I would just like to say something simple. You are
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going to seise to exist if you kill yourself. You might as well do
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something crazy before you go... be it running away from home or whatever,
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if you plan to do the big "self-fuck", then why not have fun with it?
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ÉÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ»
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º °°°°°°°°°°°°°°°° ]<-RaD Places To Find ALL The VaS Issues °°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°° º
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ÇÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄĶ
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º DaDDy HiLL HoUsE WHQ (810)348-0421 14.4k bps º
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º The Terrorist's Playground (404)394-3080 14.4k bps º
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º Goat Blowers Annonymous (215)750-0392 14.4k bps º
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º Lunatic Labs, Ltd. (213)655-0691 2400 bps º
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ÇÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄĶ
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º WoZZEl FaNcLuB - (313)605-1016 /\ aH GoT JaNe - (313)438-0390 º
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º VaS VMB - (313)605-1060 /\ NaCl VMB - (313)605-7662 º
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ÇÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄĶ
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º If you're interested in being a distribution site, contact KKK BBS. º
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ÈÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍͼ
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[VaS] 95' - "Are you ready, Are you ready to kill whitey!"
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(C)opywrite If YoU RiP ThIs OfF wE WiLL FuCk YoU uP!
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