152 lines
8.2 KiB
Plaintext
152 lines
8.2 KiB
Plaintext
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Underground eXperts United
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Presents...
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[ A Man And His Cat ] [ By Hedge ]
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____________________________________________________________________
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____________________________________________________________________
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A man and his cat
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by Hedge (c) 1998
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The other evening I was on my way home from work, using as always public
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transportation. In this case I had ended up in an old, beaten up bus way
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passed its best days. Roaring along the streets, sitting at the backmost
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seat, i suddenly realized I wasn't alone there in the back. Barely visible
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in the dim light of the setting sun, I saw a man sitting at very last seat,
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to left of me. He wasn't alone either. Right beside of him, apparently very
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relaxed, lay a cat. The cat was white, without so much as a single straw of
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any other color, and posessed two very inquisitive bright yellow eyes, which
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he showed of very sparingly to any of us two.
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Well, I thought, goes to show that not all cats are alike. Had that been
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my cat, I would have spent my journey chasing him up and down the bus, and
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he would have been hysterical from the motion and noise of the bus. I found
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it amazing how he had managed to find such a convinient cat to take care of,
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living in a big city and all. I ended my thoughts about the strange couple,
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and focused my interest on my newspaper instead.
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While reading the paper, out of the corner of my eye, I realized that the
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cat had started to move. It seemed like it wasn't very happy with the fact
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that it had to hold on with its claws every time the bus turned. Moreover,
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it seemed like it had set its mind on sleeping in the mans' lap.
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"Woah!" the man hollered. "Go sleep somwhere else, cat! This is my lap,
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and it is warm enough without you making it even warmer."
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The cat apparently realized the logic in that,and settled once again on
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the seat next to the man.
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"Cats!" the man said. "Ever had one?" he asked me. Suprised by his sudden
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question, I had to fumble with words for a short while before I finally
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managed a "yes, yes, when I was a kid".
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"Love this one", he said. "He is really clever. Even makes food for me."
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Yeah, right, I thought. Another psycho cat-lover. Seen one, you've seen
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'em all.
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Nonetheless, there was something very odd about the man, and his cat.
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Glancing to the left I started to make a small evaluation of the two. The
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cat lay still now, and seem to be dreaming of somtething, paws moving and
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everything. The man was another story. He smelled of beer consumed in large
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quantities, he had a frayed jeans-jacket, out of which an unopened beer
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bottle peered from one of the pockets. The jeans that accompanied his jacket
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badly needed a wash, and his dirty sneekers had an aroma that vaugley
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resembled the smell of an overcrowded dressingroom for icehockey players. He
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had a distant look on his face now, seemingly thinking about nothing, and
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from time to time he took a small sip from his opened beer bottle. I decided
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to strike up a conversation.
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"Is he always that calm?" I asked the man.
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"Oh yeah", the man replied. "Going by bus doesn't bother him none."
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"What if there is a dog on the bus, doesn't that stirr him up?" I
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continued in my curiosity.
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"Well, normally the dogs are interested, but after he tells them a little
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about greek philosophy, they normally get too confused to even bother."
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Now, this was getting really interesting.
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"Greek philosophy?"
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"Yeah, you know like 'everything floats', the words of Plato and stuff
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like that", the man replied in a casual, dreamy voice.
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"So," I asked, "is that in english, or?"
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"Nah, he kind of speaks in a tounge of his own, but if you really listen,
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you can understand him."
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Apparently, the man was either delirious, or one of the many cranks that
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had been denied treatment by the government in the past years. Not wanting
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to let him off the hook so easily, I carried on my interrogation.
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"How about you", I asked. "Are you familiar in Greek philosophy?"
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The man just stared at med with unblinking eyes, slowly moving his lips.
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A small drip of beer made its way down his beardstubbled cheek. At that
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time, I became aware of the cat opening his eyes. He had focused on me, and
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gave me a really uncomfortable stare.
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As I watched the cat watching me, I suddenly heard a small, very delicate
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voice in my head.
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"You shouldn't bother him with questions like that. You know very well he
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can't answer them", it said. "Why don't you go after someone your own mental
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size instead?"
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A cold chill suddenly raced down my arms, as I began to realize the fact
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of being in the midst of a supernatural event. Was it the cat, or was there
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something else speaking to me?
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The voice interrupted me.
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"It's me, the white cat-like figure in frot of you."
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After a short while, convincing myself of my own sanity, I asked aloud:
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"How come you are familiar with Greek philosophy?"
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The cat replied: "I know all sorts of philosohy. As a matter of fact you
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stumbled into us just after we had been to the university. Fascinating
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lecture by the professor by the way. He brought up the discussions about
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consequentialism. Really worthwile actually."
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"They let you inside the lecture hall?"
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"Well, you see," the cat responded, "sometimes its very handy to be a
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cat. My keeper simply brings me along, and then I act up the whole registry
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of nice cat-manners towards the prettiest ladies there, and that's it."
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"Who does the talking? You or him?"
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The cat made a small frown, and narrowed his eyes a bit.
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"Him!? He doesn't even know how to take care of himself. I aquired him
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just after he had been thrown out of the mental hospital. I must say he is a
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real asset. Doesn't ask any questions, doesn't know what goes on at all half
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the time. I run his life according to my needs, and he seems to be content
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with that."
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"Are there more cats like you?"
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He looked at me with really friendly eyes.
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"All of us. Not all are lucky enough to get such a good keeper as I have
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though. If you ever wondered why feeble minded, old or indecisive people
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have cats, you should understand it by now, shouldn't you?"
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"I guess so", I replied. "But how come..."
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"That question will have to wait", the cat interrupted me. "This is where
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we get off."
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All of a sudden, the cat poked the man with one of his claws. The man
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looked up, and started to rise. The cat climbed up, and lay down on the
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mans' left shoulder. As they made their way towards a large apartment block,
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I could clearly see how the cat was pointing the way for the man.
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Just before the bus closed its doors, I could see how the cat let himself
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be petted by a girl. He then turned his face to me and the voice came back.
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"See," he said, "it's as simple as that!"
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The sun went down as the bus approached my stop. When looking at my own
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reflection in the window, I realized that what I'd learned wasn't really a
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surprise to me.
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Somehow, I had always known.
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"Funny how it all falls away..."
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(Pulp)
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---------------------------------------------------------------------------
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uXu #472 Underground eXperts United 1998 uXu #472
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Call tHE MiCROLiNKS WHQ -> +32-16-356019
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