217 lines
8.5 KiB
Plaintext
217 lines
8.5 KiB
Plaintext
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### ###
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### #### ### ### ### ####
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### ### ##### ### ###
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### ### ### ### ###
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### ### ##### ### ###
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########## ### ### ##########
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### ###
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### ###
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Underground eXperts United
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Presents...
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####### ## ## ####### # # #### ####### #######
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## ## ## ## ##### ## ## ##
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#### ## ## #### # # ## ## #######
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## ## ## ## ##### ## ## ## ##
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## ## ####### ####### # # ###### ## #######
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[ Operation Moon Sucker ] [ By The GNN ]
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____________________________________________________________________
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____________________________________________________________________
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"OPERATION MOON SUCKER"
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by THE GNN/DualCrew-Shining/uXu
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"fuck you mister fuck your sister fuck your mother fuck your brother
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fuck your pop hey I am a cop! yes I can hey I am the Man!"
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(Thomas Pynchon, "Vineland")
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SECTION A. WHAT THE FxxK IS ACTUALLY GOING ON?
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------------------------------------------------
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Guilty: Dane Carson.
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Possible alias: 'Phraudmaster' (computer), 'Sweetheart' (mother),
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'Lazy-son-of-a-bitch' (father) and 'Jerk!' (brother).
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Crime: No idea. That is why we must raid his house to find out.
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In charge: Detective Kickass.
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Name of operation: Operation Moon Sucker! (Yeah!)
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SECTION B. CRIME-RELATED ITEMS FOUND AT THE HOME OF PHRAUDMASTER.
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-------------------------------------------------------------------
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ITEM 1: A T-shirt with the text "My parents went to Stockholm and all I
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got was this lousy T-Shirt".
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After a close look we found the t-shirt to be made out of 95% cotton and
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5% polyester. As we all know, cotton can be nitrated and Phraudmaster will
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be charged for illegal possession of explosives. Phraudmaster claims that
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polyester was invented many years ago, but we will send it to the lab to
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find out what it REALLY is.
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LAB REPORT ITEM 1: We have discovered that polyester (A2D4D2D5A4) can
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be manipulated. If the substance F5G4h<34>h"23"k3 is
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mixed with Y3 and U7 and U( together with YOHO222
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polyester will (probably) turn into LSD.
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Phraudmaster must therefor be charged for illegal
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possession of drugs.
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ITEM 2: Three magazines called "Adventures with your Commodore Amiga".
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Some articles in the magazine was about using a modulator/demodulator.
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It is common sense to know that everybody who got a modulator/demodulator
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are hackers. Therefor, Phraudmaster will be charged for hacking. To find
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out more about these magazines we will send them to the lab.
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LAB REPORT ITEM 2: If you take the first letter from the first word,
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the first word from the third word and the third
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letter from the last word you will get 'ACI'.
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Take the 'A' and place it after the 'I' and you
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will get 'CIA'.
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Phraudmaster must be charged for espionage.
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ITEM 3: A telephone.
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Phraudmaster claims that he used the phone to call his friends. Ha ha.
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Of course, Phraudmaster uses the phone for fraud, what else should he use
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it for? It will be send down to the lab immediately.
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LAB REPORT ITEM 3: There was a note on the back of the phone:
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'5255463251223'.
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We believe this to be the serial number. We have
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checked this number with all stores over the world,
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but no one can answer if they have really sold this
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phone. Therefor, the phone must be stolen.
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Charge Phraudmaster for theft.
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ITEM 4: Twenty issues of HUSTLER.
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There must be something strange with these magazines. We will place them
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in the sleeping room down at the police station and let all officers of the
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law have a chance to find out what it can be.
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LAB REPORT ITEM 4: Yes, there is absolutely something weird here. We
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feel forced to keep half of the magazines for another
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week to find out what it can be.
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LAB REPORT ITEM 4: (extra comment): We have used a common ruler to
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measure the height of the girls in the magazine.
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We found out that (even if the girls looked like
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adults) they were only 10-35 centimeters high. This
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means that the girls must be children.
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Charge Phraudmaster for child abuse.
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ITEM 5: Russian-American, American-Russian dictionary.
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Well, well... Phraudmaster claims that he studies a lot of languages at
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school for his education. That is not OUR opinion. Phraudmaster must be a
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former member of KGB.
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LAB REPORT ITEM 5: We have examined all of the words in the dictionary.
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Yes, the words 'espionage', 'hacking', 'fraud',
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'murder', 'killing', 'poison', 'explosives',
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'blasphemy' and 'sex' are available for translation.
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This is outrageous.
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ITEM 6: Dust (found under the bed).
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While Detective Kickass was crawling under the bed, he got a lot of dust
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in his nose. He immediately begun to sneeze. When he got up he felt very
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dizzy. We suspect the dust to be mixed with cocaine.
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LAB REPORT ITEM 6: Yes, it is cocaine. Down here at the lab, we have
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been addicted to cocaine for seven years now which
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means that we are so used to it that we do not get
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any more kicks out of it. When we had injected this
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'dust' into our blood veins we felt nothing.
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Therefor, it MUST be cocaine.
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ITEM 7: A note saying 'Dane, Bill wanted you to call him'.
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The note was written by Phraudmaster's mother. She has now been
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arrested. After a while, she told us that 'Bill' was a friend
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Phraudmaster. We immediately arrested him.
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LAB REPORT ITEM 7: Both Bill and Dane's mothers are drug abusers. They
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smoke 10-20 'Marlboro Red' every day.
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Give 'em thirty years boys!
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ITEM 8: A War-Dialer.
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We found something that we believe to be a War-Dialer. A War-Dialer is a
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little device that makes it possible to check a lot of telephone numbers.
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It is a common device in the hacking-business.
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LAB REPORT ITEM 8: Yes, this is a analog war-dialer. When using it,
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Phraudmaster just had to flip the pages to the
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name he wanted to call. The dialer is labeled
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'Southern N.Y Telephone Directory Book'.
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SECTION C. THE COOL RESULT!
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-----------------------------
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FROM: Detective Kickass NYPD (we are not playing computer cops)
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TO: Steff Crownbranch (I am the BOSS so FUCK YOU)
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SUBJECT: Operation Moon Sucker.
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Another true success! We have charged Dane Carson for hacking,
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espionage, illegal possession of explosives and drugs, child abuse and
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theft. Since this Phraudmaster guy is over fifteen years of age, we have
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already sent him to the magic electric chair, a sentence that we all
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happily agreed to down at the police station last saturday during the
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annual Wine'n Booze Police-Party.
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Yours, Kickass.
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(everyone is guilty)
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///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
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Who is this John Galt guy?
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Give me the answer: THE STASH +46-13-ohyesyouhavetoreadtheindex
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In the desert I can play.
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---------------------------------------------------------------------------
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uXu #176 Underground eXperts United 1994 uXu #176
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Call CLU 'PUTERNET -> +1-515-232-7631
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---------------------------------------------------------------------------
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