186 lines
8.7 KiB
Plaintext
186 lines
8.7 KiB
Plaintext
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Underground eXperts United
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Presents...
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## ## ## ## ##### ## ## ## ## ## ##
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[ Utopia ] [ By The GNN ]
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____________________________________________________________________
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____________________________________________________________________
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UTOPIA
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by THE GNN/DualCrew/uXu
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"Unauthorized access prohibited. Offenders will be MUTILATED."
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(Sedes D.)
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
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A cynic.
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PREFACE
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Dream: "Oops! I failed again!"
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Truth: "SHIT FUCKING SHIT HELL DAMN FUCK THIS DAMN SHIT!"
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"What happened?", you will ask yourself.
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INTRODUCTION TO THE UTOPIA
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The world is boring and telling truths about yourself to yourself is only
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depressing. But is it not incredible irritating to go out and have some
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fun when you must be presented to Jerks all the time. Bah! People show up
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at the local pubs or bars with strange cousins, brothers,
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friends-from-god-know-where and they just HAVE to introduce them to you.
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Yes, it is okay to say hello and then continue drinking that expensive beer
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or keep talking to that nice-looking girl. BUT THAT IS NOT THE END OF IT!
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These Jerks just have to keep talking shit to you. Even when you begin to
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act slightly unfriendly they keep staying. How do you explain to a Jerk
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that he is a Jerk? So the nice night turns into yet another depressing
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moment in life when the Jerk need an explanation why you asked him to piss
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off and get his ass to several places around the globe.
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So you get another reason to argue and it will eventually turn into a
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fight which will end rather quick when some pseudo-saint fellow separates
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you from the Jerk. After screaming various nasty words to each other you
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go home to forget it all. Next weekend it is all the same. Why do people
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keep asking about reasons to suicide?
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ABOUT ALCOHOL
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You work all day long and when you have a free moment you want orgasms.
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But of course, other people who want to feel that they are so incredible
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intelligent will stop you. They demand an end to the drinking and smoking.
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If possible, they would probably stop sex too. Do they really believe that
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life is so damn fun when constructing ovens eight hours a day that you can
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forget all about it without alcohol?
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DEMOCRACY
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The word "democracy" has been compared with god itself. Everything that
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is good is "democracy". Everything bad are places that does not have
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"democracy". WHAT FUCKING DEMOCRACY? The only thing you can do is to
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choose (haha) between different bad things. All of them consists of mad
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idiots who see themselves as Jesus Christ (with the exception that THEY can
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crucify whoever or whatever they want). But if you discover that the
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smiling fag you voted for last time turns out to be yet another child who
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want to show his pals in other countries that he has got the biggest toys,
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then what can you do? NOTHING. He will sit there until the time is ready
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for yet another election. A bunch of lies are presented to you again and
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oops, he is there again.
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THEN WHAT?
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Ok, so you get a rather good life with many moments of joy and happiness.
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Then what? Do you honestly believe that it will end calm and peaceful? No
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way! You will probably die in a very ridiculous way like swallowing a
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tooth-pick at a cocktail party or fart by an open fire and explode.
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CHECK OF THE PRESENT SITUATION
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Let us say that you manage to write interesting files and finally join
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some known text file group. It does not matter how good files you write,
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sooner or later another guy will join and produce one or two files. After
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that he will tell You how to write Your files or why not how to run the
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entire group!
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EXAMPLE
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Let me tell you a story from my own life (some people just love to write
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files about themselves - but I try to avoid it (but in this case, it can be
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quite interesting)). I was awaiting a rather large sending of guns to my
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paintball company from a salesman. It was supposed to come to Sweden from
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England on thursday and arrive to my office the next day. I was not
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surprised at all when the phone rang and I was informed that the sending
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had not arrived. Nobody did not really know why, but the company in
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England claimed that they had sent everything in time. Days passed and one
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week later the sending finally arrived. The delay had been caused due to
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some idiot who imported marmalade. Marmalade? Yes, he had not bothered to
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get permission to trade anything and the custom stopped everything in the
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truck who carried a lot of things - including my stuff. So, now finally my
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stuff came over the border and it would be in my hands the next day. I was
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not at all surprised when the phone rang and I was informed that everything
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had been stolen during the night. Someone probably knew that the sending
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had arrived and struck the company. "Don't worry", the salesman told me.
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"We will immediately call and ask for an emergency transport of new guns.
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It will be here in two days. It will be on your desk by the end of this
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week!". I sure hoped so, because now it began to really burn under my
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feet. We had the entire weekend fully booked and we must get the guns!
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Friday came, and I was not at all surprised when I found no parcels in my
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box. I called the salesman and asked him whatthehell had happened. He
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swore on his mothers grave that he had sent the stuff by express and that
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it must be at some mail terminal. After dozens of calls I gave up. I
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could not trace it to any main terminal and the staff working there could
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not find it. Then the phone rang again. It was the salesman again.
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"Eh, well, uh, I checked again and it seems like it have been small
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misunderstanding here...".
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"What?" I must admit that my voice sounded rather annoyed.
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"It has been sent by economy mail. By mistake..."
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Economy mail takes three days. I am still waiting for it.
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DEATH
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People see Death as the ultimate crime. War is horrible and murder is so
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incredible bad, bad, bad. So what? We are all going to die sooner or
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later. We are only a piece of dust in the eternal cosmos and planet Earth
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will not stay forever. It will die and disappear and no one will notice it
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because it was only here for a brief moment of time, compared to the real
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time found in space.
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THE KING IS DEAD
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Who is the king? I do not know, but he is dead. Long live the king.
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EVERYBODY
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People need to make themselves more important than they are. They enjoy
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to complain and argue with other just to be seen. The best thing you can
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do when meeting such a person is to listen to his stream of crap and then
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give him or her a good kick in the ass. Then you have stated your opinion.
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You do not care to even argue with the individual, you just kick. That
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should do it. You do not waste time to tell the truth.
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SO-CALLED FRIENDS
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There is nothing called "real friends". Note that I did not use the word
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"nowadays", since it has never ever existed any real friends through
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history. It is all about give and take from each other. If you have
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nothing to offer your "friend" he/she will not be especially interested any
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more. Money, sex, laughs, things etc. Give away to those who can offer
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you something in return... and when you are empty, bye bye...
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EPILOGUE
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"What happened", you will ask yourself.
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"Was is really life I just experienced?"
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"No, must have been a practical joke", you say and try to sleep again.
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//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
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Call the ANYONE BBS - WHAT NUMBER?
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But I guess uXu will also be at your service - check the INDEX file.
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You never speak to me now that you have a word processor.
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