535 lines
27 KiB
Plaintext
535 lines
27 KiB
Plaintext
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who am i but a lonely soul lost in a vast wasteland of rational
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viewings of selfmanifested drug empire states and puppydog fears? maybe
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caught like the rat in his indulgent trap nipping at cheese doodled
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nightmares looking through rose colored evasivecy and gnawing through
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his own foot rather than face the challenges in a post-apocalyptic
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neuro-plague..........well, whatever that word is.
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laughing at a shallow moon-----
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johnny kingfish
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(via e-mail)
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babybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybaby
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babybaby yba aby byba abyb byba babybaby
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babybaby bybabyba babybaby byb yba babybaby byb yba ba ba babybaby
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babybaby yba babybaby yba aby yba ba ba babybaby
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babybabybabyb yba babybaby byb yba babybaby byb yba ba ba babybaby
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babybaby yba aby byb yba aby byb yba ba ba babybaby
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babybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybaby
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Laughing at the Little Moron
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June 11th, 1995
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__________________________________________________________________________
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| Editor : Blade X | Call Tejas at 512-467-0663 for BBS pickup |
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| bladex@bga.com | Send e-mail to majordomo@bga.com with the |
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| Neo-Wobblie Node # 269 | message "subscribe scream" in the body. |
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| Issues left : 275 |
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|__________________________________________________________________________|
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Tom Kindig (tokind@netcom.com) Fight the Fascist Pinheads
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The Jackals are coming in Cornflakespace
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About Bob Ediborial (me)
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Anus
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Series : Thoughts on Work (me) E-mail
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Being Unemployed Hal Hill
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Morning in America Dr. Cat
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What are you Wearing?
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Focus Groups
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The Jackals are coming in! (Tom Kindig)
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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The Jackals are coming in and, as usual, it's quite a show. They are pretty
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and charming & they remind you of Bob, but they are not. They come sniffing
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around, one at a time, because they suspect that something is up & they want
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to be a part of it. They work alone, but they will form pairs or a pack for
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a few minutes if it will serve their interests. The Jackals dress nicely &
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communicate wonderfully. You know exactly what they are saying because you
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have seen it before. They remind you of Bob, what with their shiny fine
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coats, enthusiastic ears, and that built in smile so reassuring. You sit,
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mesmerized, and watch them work. You wonder if one would shake your hand.
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It's just possible; but you know that fetching something or sitting on
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command would be out of the question. You wonder. But no, it would take a
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long time to coax a Jackal over to you & they are very busy at the moment.
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They begin to circle and prance. They take little snaps at each other to try
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to establish some sort of pecking order. It is completely fluid & informal,
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but it will only have to work for a while. Until the job is done.
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The problem with the Jackals is that, in all of this charming exchange,
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preliminary to the job at hand, they attract the attention of the Hyenas.
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<shudder> No one likes the Hyenas, big ugly brutes. But before you know it
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they are there. They come in packs, well organized, ready to go straight to
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work. They don't take shit from anyone. They are so massive, so repulsive,
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that almost everyone else clears the area right away. Except now you are
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caught in THEIR circle. You were sitting there admiring the Jackals, outside
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of the circle, when the Hyenas came in. Now the circle is enlarged. The
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Hyenas are all around. The Jackals have vanished and you are wondering what
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the FUCK you are going to do now. You'll be very lucky if you are not killed
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just for being in the way.
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Ediborial (me)
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Phil Gramm
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Pete Wilson
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Pat Buchanan
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Bob Dole
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If there is a phrase which best expresses the current roster of
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Republican Presidential candidate front-runners, it would be "fascist
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pinheads."
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Remember that you read it here first.
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The hand writing is on the wall. America is crying for leadership and you
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and I had better start looking someplace else.
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Where will the current wave of ex-patriates head to? Czechslovakia is
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filling up, is what I hear, plus both Wired and Details have written
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articles about it. None of the former countries of the U.S.S.R. have
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stable enough Net connections to consider. Plus, I don't know if I can
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afford a good enough gang. Since Jag moved to Seattle, I don't hear
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much anymore of his floating ship project, Autopia. E-mail me if you
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have any suggestions for the country of choice for people wanting to
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flee the repressive cultural crackdown programs slated for 1997.
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A more likely scenario than leaving the country is that I will leave
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behind the exploration and probing of the darker side of the psyche.
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Those places where people get upset if you look at. John Leo is a
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conservative columnist for US News & World Report, and in one column
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slagged Nine Inch Nails for having songs containing lyrics of death and
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nihilism. He repeated it twice. For these type of people, there is no
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distinction between discussion and advocacy. I also read in other
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magazines about Trent Reznor being offered poetry, letters, etc. at
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*each* show because of the connection made through his music. It's like,
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oh, someone else feels the same way I do. I thought I was the only one,
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blah blah blah. I don't want to turn this into a Ninniehead love-a-rama,
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but rather to point out that being part of something larger than one
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self is an anti-dote to isolation and alienation. This too, is lost to
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people like Leo, who also fails to acknowledge the distinction between
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not having values and not having *his* values.
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Fuck 'em. On one hand I want to dismiss this as just another Baby Boomer
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getting his rocks off of slagging the values of me and those my age.
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They do it so often, they just like it. Maybe it prevents them from
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looking at who it was that was responsible for teaching us said values
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in the first place. I mean, you guys run the country, not us.
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But the flip side is the huge amount of time spent worrying about
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integrity. No charge is more damaging or deadly than that of "selling
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out". It pervades the culture like nothing else. What do you think
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killed Curt Kobain?
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Oops! I made a reference to someone who committed suicide. Oh well, I
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have until 1997 to learn to reprogram my thinking. Keep looking on the
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bright side of life! It'll be all hope and sunshine from now on!
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Ok, I need to practice more in the mirror.
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Thoughts on Work : MORNING IN AMERICA (me)
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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All across America, people start their work day the same. Futzing around.
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Whether it's heading for donuts or bagels in the break room, gathering around
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the coffee machine, or collecting money for breakfast tacos, the first
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20 minutes of any work day is spent discussing every salient detail that
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happened between 5:00 p.m. the day before and this Very!second.
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Usually about what was on television the night before.
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See, you and I are not so different.
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FOCUS GROUPS (me)
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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If you live in a University town like I do, there's probably a market
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firm specializing in focus research groups. Basically you walk into a
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room with nine other strangers, while someone really really friendly
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asks you questions about your shopping experiences. Mine was on 7-11.
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What is it like to go through the express lane at a grocery store? What
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is it like when you go to a convenience store? Questions like that back
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and forth for an hour and a half.
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I actually unearthed a testable sociological theorem : when one stands
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in grocery store check out lines, one tends to think about committing
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acts of mass violence on the people in front of you. When one goes to a
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convenience store, one tends to think about acts of mass violence
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committed upon you.
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Think about it. No one ever worries about being robbed, mugged, or
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assaulted at an HEB or a Tom Thumb, but everyone has a story about
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soemthing happening at a 7-11 or a Circle K. Likewise, it was only while
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discussing HEB did people fantasize "whipping out a gun and blowing
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everyone away".
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I don't think my really really friendly marketing assistant appreciated
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the beauty of this inherent truth.
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Nor my speculation on why we didn't think an elderly woman was a typical
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customer. A pastiche of demographically diverse photographs were
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splattered on the wall, and we were asked which ones you thought of
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being customers, and why, and which ones we didn't, and why. In our
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society, I said, we have a tendency to discount the value of elderly
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people. We try to shove them out of our thoughts and mind, such that
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elderly women often complain about being "invisible" members of society.
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She quickly moved on to another photograph. Oh well.
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One other thing about focus research groups.
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Once I answered a phone call for one of my roommates, asking about being
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in a research focus group. He wasn't home, but I was, and after going
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through the initial screening, was offered $25 for an hour's worth of
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answering questions. Was I interested? You bet!
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So was my roommate Christopher, and so he called the research firm right
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back to see if he could get in on the action.
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MRFG: "Certainly, what category do you qualify for?"
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C: "Uh, what categories are there?"
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MRFG: "college students...blah blah blah...small businessmen."
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C: "Oh, I own my own business" [Lie! Lie! Lie!]
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MRFG: "Ok, then show up at this time and you will be paid $100"
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$100! for the same hour!
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America loves small business. Try to remember this : if anyone ever
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asks, just say you're a small business owner.
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CORNFLAKESPACE (you don't have the security clearance to know)
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Cyber this
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For all of you who are sick of the term "cyber"
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the new Operative term is "cornflake".
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Use it as much as possible to throw people off the scent.
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For example: "We cornflaked the images together to that psycho-doloop effect"
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or "We were cornflaking like crazy during PANIC"
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This public service annoucement from your friends in Chicago.
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we will know if we were successful if "cornflake" shows up in Wired's jargon
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watch.
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Thoughts on Work : BEING UNEMPLOYED (me)
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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There's something about being unemployed that incubates the Angry Young
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Man living inside each and every one of us. A grating anger at the
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world, an irritableness at the people around you, and a conspiratorial
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conviction that every yazoo in the world is out to make your life a
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living.
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about Bob Tom Kindig
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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You need to know a few things about Bob. Bob comes in all shapes and sizes.
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Having spent any significant time around any of him, you know who he is and
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what he is saying. Bob is an open book. You can walk up to him, a total
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stranger on neutral territory, and he will tell you how he's feeling,
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whether or not he's approachable, whether or not he likes you. This is true
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of Wolf too, but he's not socialized; he reserves the right to change his
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mind quite suddenly. Back to Bob.
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For some reason it is seen as useful to train Bob in special ways sometimes.
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Bob is not especially mean or defensive. He is most likely to be very
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social. He wants to fit in. You have to train Bob to act otherwise. So you
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teach Bob, starting when he is young, to be territorial. He has it in him
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but you have to coax this trait into the foreground to make it useful. You
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will train Bob to guard your property & person. You withhold affection from
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Bob. You keep him away from other people, or you tense his leash in presence
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of others to communicate a sense of threat. You play very rough with Bob &
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without affection. You reward him for biting. You tech him to be mean. You
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establish a territory for him & you teach him to attack any intruder. He
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responds to polite greeting with a snarl and bluster.
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The problem with all of this is that Bob is no longer a very trustworthy
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friend. Guests no longer feel safe in your home because, being strangers to
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Bob, they have to be careful where they go. Even family members have to be
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careful around Bob. You don't quite trust him with the kids. He just doesn't
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have those social skills. He jumps to conclusions, and into action, too
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quickly for you to control. The asset that you have created in Bob begins to
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look like a liability.
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It's not his fault, but you feel like you can't handle Bob anymore. No one
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else wants him--he's scary. You can't stand the idea of having him
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destroyed. He IS Bob, after all. I mean, you can't just kill him & forget
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about it. So you set Bob free to fend for himself.
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Bob finds a niche for himself somewhere & he is the biggest, baddest Bob in
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the area. His territory grows as the months pass. He gathers a following.
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Being the Alpha male of the group, he encourages certain standards of
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behavior. Only time and his own physical stamina work against Bob. People in
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the area start to worry. As the damage increases & people begin to feel more
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threatened, they will call in the authorities. They don't know Bob & they
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don't care where he came from or how he got to be the way he is. They only
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know that being Alpha is anti-social & is not to be tolerated.
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Time,
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and the limits of his own stamina,
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work against Bob.
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Thoughts on Work : WHAT ARE YOU WEARING? (me)
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Back in the winter of 1993, there was a thread running on the Future
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Culture mailing list that Andy Hawks created about what people were
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wearing *right* at that moment.
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While looking at the contents of an old diskette, I found a clip dated
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February 2nd, 1993. Here's what I wrote:
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"I'm wearing plaid boxers; a 2600 t-shirt with a picture of a
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blue box on the front and a collection of hacker headlines on
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the back; one is a large metal 'healing bracelet' made monks in
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Tibet, the other is two small black leather cables; and two
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necklaces, a silver chained Mayan phoenix bird and a leather
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strapped metal tablet that says 'War is not healthy for children
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and other living things.'
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I'm embarassed to be sitting here in my underwear, so excuse me
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for a minute while I go put on some shorts.
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100% cotton, blue and purple striped Guatemalan.
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Much better."
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Amazingly, on June 10th, 1995, while doing most of the work for this
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issue, I am wearing the *SAME* pair of Guatemalan shorts. I just look
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down, and there they are. I didn't plan it or nothing. If that is not a
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testimonial, I don't know what is.
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>From hal@CyberGate.COM Sun Jun 11 00:21:19 1995
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Date: Wed, 22 Mar 95 12:20:56 -0800
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From: Hal Hill <hal@CyberGate.COM>
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Hi David, here's a fan letter for you sent as an attachment. If this
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portion is all you get please let me know so I can re-send the main
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letter. Thanks, Hal Hill
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Hello David Smith, wanted to let you know I have enjoyed reading
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issues 1, 2, and 3 of Scream Baby. You are a thoughtful young
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gentleman, that's for sure; and you seem not to take your pain
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too seriously, so I predict you'll keep on thinking as the years
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go by. No fear of the passion going away, you don't sound full
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of yourself enough for that to happen.
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I would say that I was much like you twenty years ago--I'm 46--
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but I'm mostly like you now so it doesn't amount to much. I'm
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a part time freelancer and have been for twenty years. Got two
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degrees, one in lit one in philosophy in 1975. I've been a
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groundskeeper for the State of California for about twenty
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years, at a state diagnostic facility in Fresno--Bang Bang
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You're dead--California. Lots of gangs. I used to write
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fiction and published stuff in Amazing Stories, Twilight Zone,
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and the Mag of Fantasy & Science fiction, but haven't written
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fiction for about ten years. Last couple of years I've been
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writing about cyberspace, it being the most fantastic thing I've
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run into. Dont' know much about hippies, but I think I was one.
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I liked Mr. Mizrach's piece on generation Xers in Scream 2 I
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believe.
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Point being that I'm writing a piece for a magazine called
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INFOBAHN now on zines, only electronic ones. I'm planning to
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rip off some of your answers to the lady that asked a bunch of
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questions in the alt.zines newsgroup in December of last year.
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I've been reading zines for awhile and will not be taking the
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same zines-as-entreprenureal-platform that I think she was
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after.
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I will be talking about passion and such. Cutting off an ear to
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paint a clearer picture of your day at the laundromat or
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something like that. That's what I like about zines. Not just
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personal zines more-or-less like yours, I'll be looking at a
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zine that exposes religious jerks and jerkettes, a news zine--
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Bong L I believe it's called. There is still certainly something
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stringing them all together, something respectable I believe,
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and I plan to write about that.
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So I'm hoping you can give me some update on your thoughts about
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zines. You said you write your zine for you, the readers being
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along for the ride. "If you have to think about whether you're
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going to start a zine," you told Hilary Lane, "you probably
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won't. Those that do publish zines, it's just something that
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they do, that they have to do. It's an obsession, an itch that
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has to be scratched, and either you have it or you don't. And
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if it's not a zine, it becomes expressed some other way."
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Maybe you could tell me a little more about that. You know
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other zine publishers, like **** I believe. How many of them
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share your feelings? Or anything else you want to say about
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that. You'll be turning 27 soon. How long will you keep up
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with Scream Baby. And if you dont' mind, like Mickey Rourke
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said to Faye Dunaway in BARFLY, "I'm goin to ask you the same
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thing people always ask me. What do you do?"
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So in conclusion I'm including a thought I cleaned up over
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several years I believe, and stuck in my file--wish I had a
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scanner as this was pre pc. Hope you like it. And I look
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forward to any thoughts you may care to share with me about your
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zine writing and publishing experience.
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Best, Hal Hill
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hal@cybergate.com
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Hal is referring to an article that I posted to alt.zines in response to
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a reporter's question about why people do zines. You've included the
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basics of what I believe, and I don't know if there is anything *to*
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add. There's no justification or rationale for why people publish zines,
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other than there is something that I have to say that is not being
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expressed. It itches, scratches, and claws at your mental insides until
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finally it just comes boiling out. At least that's what it is like for
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me. It's not the type of thing I ask other people.
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Factsheet 5 used to have a section where people would try to answer this
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question and all the answers were the same : a variation of "just
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because". I think more interesting would be to ask people why they
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picked one format over another. Like why writing an e-zine than say,
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drawing a comic? I could be a decent artist by now if I spent the same
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amount of time learning to draw rather than learning to write. What is
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it about a medium that allows the expression of certain ideas? That'd be
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something I'd be more interested in.
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As far as Scream Baby goes, I've promised 287 issues, of which this is
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number 12.
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Laughing at the Little Moron: Hal Hill
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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I find I'll often laugh at tasteless jokes before I can make a
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decision whether I ought or ought not laugh, if they're funny.
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Which is a funny thing because jokes that pivot on dehumanizing
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elements shouldn't be funny. Mind you this doesn't apply if I
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understand that an offensive joke is on the way. That is, if a
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story starts out, "Did you hear about the fag that . . .," or,
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"This cunt walks into a logging camp and says . . .." then I can
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walk away, or simply explain that I don't want ot hear anymore
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AIDS or nigger jokes, thanks anyway. But if I'm caught off
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guard I'll laugh at anybody or anything.
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I've laughed at jokes about farmers daughters and salesmen,
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about blacks,yuppies, Mexicans, elephants, Pollacks, Aggies,
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WASPS, morons, Bohemians, mondeys and corks, women and children,
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priests, popes, and Jusus Christ. To my chagrin, it seems that
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nothing is sacred to my funny bone.
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It seems that my sense of humor often outstrips my sense of
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propriety, which is for the most part a good thing,because I
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wouldn't want to sacrifice a sense of humor for a keen sense of
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propriety, the former being more necessary for survival that the
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latter. That is, you can get along in the world just fine
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without a sense of propriety, but you'll never make it without
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a sense of humor.
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Date: Sun, 12 Feb 1995 17:20:52 -0600 (CST)
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From: "Dr. Cat" <cat@eden.com>
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Subject: Re: The Burn, Recycle, Blame Issue
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> Another point of disagreement revolves around escape plans. I'm like, why
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> bother making them? There is no way someone will be able to walk into a mall on
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> Christmas Eve, drop concussion grenades into the atrium in order to wipe out
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> people on the ground level while simultaneous strafing the mall hallways with
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> automatic fire, and expect to escape alive. It's not the mall police that you
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> have to worry about, but armed shoppers. Either way, B_____ wastes a lot of
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Armed shoppers are not an issue if you do proper research in advance. Do
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not go to a Texas mall, or a New York City mall. Deliberately select a
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part of the country where there is a mall of sufficient size, but few or
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none of the average citizens ever go around armed. Anyway - I would tend
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to think that to get the proper shock, publicity, and fame, a killer
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should be limiting themselves to guns or below. But if you ARE going to
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allow concussion grenades, it's a piece of CAKE to escape. Go to a two
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story mall, lean on the rail overlooking the most crowded first floor
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area. Hold two grenades discreetly in your fists, ready to drop. Act
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casual occasionally glance around a bit, wait until you think there's a
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good chance nobody is looking directly at you, or if anyone is, very few
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people are. Let the grenades slip from your hands, while calmly turning
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to the side and starting to walk away from the railing. Act surprised at
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the blast, then just mimic the reactions of some particular large subset
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of the panicing crowds. Piece of CAKE. If you wanted, you might be able
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to roll some MORE grenades over the edge, or into the crowd on your
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level, in the ensuing chaos, and STILL get away.
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Mind you, I think this is somewhat moot. If you want to become a legend,
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the escape probably does not have the sheer dramatic impact of the
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shootout with the cops to the very end. Whether the end is them shooting
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you, you shooting yourself, or you setting off explosives and maybe even
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taking a few more people with you. The possibility of killing a few
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extras by getting some cops isn't to be overlooked either, and the
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killing of one or more cops provides a different kind of startlingness
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than the killing of a civilian, so it's better to mix both. Still, now I
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think about it, getting away is of possible merit because A) it's novel,
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hasn't really been done before. B) You can do MORE to boost your fame,
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whether it be anonymous letters, even taunts someday like "Twenty years
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later, you STILL have not caught me!", or even things like C) You can go
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and do a SECOND mall if you get away clean, and double your body count!
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Of course, doing a mall is really pretty wimpy compared to a world cup
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soccer game, the superbowl if you're american-biased, or best of all, a
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rock concert, where people are packed REALLY fucking close together, and
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searched for weapons at the gate, and the exits are too few and small and
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would be jammed and you could take out HUGE numbers of people! You might
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argue that the difficulty of getting your own weapons in rules this out.
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I say sure, the mall may be accessible to any BOZO of a would-be mass
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murderer. But a BOZO isn't going to come up with the quality of planning
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that you and your friend are, either. Once you've gone that far, you
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might as well plan for the ultimate. Getting a job working to help set
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up the concert would let you do the job. ESPECIALLY if you get a job
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working security! You would be in a position to know where the key
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threats to you were, and when, and exactly how they're armed! Better
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still, get a job as HEAD of security, and you can make sure there are
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weaknesses in the planned arrangements that EXACTLY suit your plan.
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>
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> 1. People jump into cyberspace for these things : software, sex, games,
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^^^^^^^^^^^
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> services. Then there is a small percentage (10% or so) who use the
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> technology of communication to think, to create, and to explore.
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^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
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> Join us.
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This is the REAL reason I wrote back to you. Sex, games. Think, create,
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explore. Don't fool yourself - same damn things. Really, they are. If
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they're not, you're not doing them right. That's where my job comes in.
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-- Dr. Cat
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Anus Tom Kindig
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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The preceding comments are not about security guards or police. They are
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most explicitly about the pack of Jackals who appear on your television
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every day, and the Hyenas who will surely follow. They are about the Bob's
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who get a raw deal, either through training or through neglect.
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These analogies to dogs are applied to people with some accuracy. People
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and dogs have been living & working together for tens of thousands of years.
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People entertain cats. People LIVE with, WORK with, care for and ARE CARED
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FOR by dogs. We are so much alike that it is alarming.
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-ToKind
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