664 lines
36 KiB
Plaintext
664 lines
36 KiB
Plaintext
+= poor old ugly pompous electronic yams #4 =+
|
|
|
|
.s$$$$$$s. .s$$$$s. .s$$ $$s. .s$$$$$$s. .s$$$$$$$s. $$$ $$$
|
|
$$$$ $$$$ $$$ $$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$ $$$
|
|
$$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$ $$$
|
|
$$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$ $$$
|
|
$$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$$$$s. $$$$
|
|
$$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$
|
|
$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$$$$$$$ $$$$ $$$$
|
|
$$$$ $$$ $$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ #4
|
|
$$$$ s$$$$s .$$$$$$$$$. $$$$ .s$$$$$$$s. $$$$
|
|
|
|
A large wiener dog
|
|
------------------
|
|
|
|
A large wiener dog.. barks against a duck..
|
|
Silly dog.. that duck is sacred and rough..
|
|
I ought to kill him string him and eat him..
|
|
Instead I think I will tie him and beat him..
|
|
I tied the Dog today.. and called him dildo..
|
|
He makes a great pet.. and I just needed a rhymO..
|
|
I haven't completed anything in this poem.. but who cares?
|
|
What of the DUCK.. why are there fleas in my hair?
|
|
For some reason.. there was once a poodle..
|
|
Oh wait this poem ended leagally.. the second I molested the beagle.
|
|
|
|
==============================================================================
|
|
|
|
"An Average Day in Nybar's Life" - by Nybar + Fro Boy
|
|
|
|
First, Nybar woke up. And it, was, goooddd.
|
|
It had to get worse.. boyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
|
|
He went downstairs, and ate some food..
|
|
And presently.. bit a bee.
|
|
He didn't know why this had to rhyme..
|
|
.. fRobOy insisted upon it,
|
|
bees were going to be the theme of this story..
|
|
aye, he had one in his bonnet <he has a bonnet?>
|
|
jC said bees make honey.. and they polenate flowers to.
|
|
We looked at him as if he was crazy, and said
|
|
`whats wrong with you?!' he felt his forehead, and it was
|
|
hot, `I THINK I HAVE THE FLU!' we stuck a thermomater up
|
|
his ass, and `OWWW!! that stings!' quoth he.
|
|
To our shocking suprise, we then surmised.. he had been
|
|
stung by a bee, in the knee. Nybar said `I'll get the ointment'
|
|
and he then did blow his nose... `I'm going to rub this on
|
|
you.. so your eyes you better close'. `AHAHH! GET AWAY FROM
|
|
ME!!' quoth mighty jC.. `it is but a mere sting, from a bee.'
|
|
Then froBoy<eeeeee> did speak `Shut, be quiet, I ask you please..
|
|
for you 2 talking together, is like the buzzing of bees.'
|
|
`Oh go to `ell' then nybar did speak, for he had had enough
|
|
of this rhyme.. he never got to use `Your the bees knees'
|
|
.. so fare thee well until another time.
|
|
|
|
============================================================================
|
|
|
|
=---------------------------=
|
|
Lo, Coffee is Good
|
|
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
|
|
|
|
Oh, coffee, how I love thee.. morning noon and night..
|
|
You help my brain wake up.. and make me feel alright.
|
|
Oh, coffee, how I love thee.. you fill me with caffiene.
|
|
You splash around my bladder, and excrete through my spleen.
|
|
Coffee is truly wonderful.. Lo, coffee is good..
|
|
Whyohwhy I love thee so much.. I ne'er understood.
|
|
Ice Coffee in the Summer, Ice Coffee in the spring..
|
|
and when the snow is lightly falling, hot coffee is the thing.
|
|
With a draught of heavy cream.. and aroundapound of FRUCTOSE..
|
|
Coffee would be not as good.. if you were intolerant of LACTOSE.
|
|
Though there is much more to coffee.. we must say goodbye..
|
|
As you drive the road of life, don't spill it on your thigh.
|
|
|
|
==========================================================================
|
|
|
|
Nybar VS The Yum-Yum Tum-Tums
|
|
-------------------------------
|
|
|
|
your probably thinking to yourself right now
|
|
`why the hell am I READING this crap!?!?!?'
|
|
I still don't have an answer.
|
|
and besides... very few are. but.... lets cut to the walrus..
|
|
your stomach wants to know if this is some kinda P0UpEY
|
|
rAd crossover thingie.. well.. I heard they were trying to
|
|
eliminate cats.. and I WORSHIP cats.. and in the supposed
|
|
future of the yum-yum tum-tums.. they controlled the place..
|
|
with anti cat crap. But in MYYY timeline.. CATS AND CAT
|
|
WORSHIP WAS DA THING!# <Some witty.. inspirational thingie>
|
|
yeah! pretty boys say fudge.. I SAY FOOK!!@!!#@!# YEAH!!
|
|
YEAHYEAHYEAH! ok I'l shut up.
|
|
heres the story.
|
|
|
|
------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
w0o0o0o0o0o0ooo0o0o0oOo0o)OOO)O).. watch out for scary people
|
|
------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
The yum-yum tum-tums.. my ollddd enemies. showing there faces again,
|
|
ok.. not just showin em.. taking over amerikaa. well someeone was gonna
|
|
get killed..andit was gonna be them. not me. there were thousands of them
|
|
.. there were one or 2 of me. And my ragged band of misfits who resented
|
|
being called a ragged band of misfits.. but .. they were..
|
|
<cool show down music plays> there was poopety pants.. who could throw
|
|
poop at people. Next .. there was Mr. Stupid.. who could almost
|
|
recite the abC song. then there was fro boy.. one of my only followers
|
|
to survive the war of the zine jerks, his powers are almost limitless..
|
|
heres an creepy third rate new york ascii artists conception..:
|
|
( *************************)
|
|
( ** - - ) ) +| ) ****** ))
|
|
** ****|****************** ) ) )
|
|
(one one billionth of the actual size of the middle of his fro)
|
|
-
|
|
|
|
--------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
< MUIEN PENIS!! > - :|----< - - - - - - - - (====|||
|
|
----------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
and then..... there was fizzy pop. The epitome of rebelion.. he was
|
|
a pop bottle of destiny. His carbon whatever could kill. And he
|
|
tasted better from the bottle.
|
|
Yeah.. they were misfits all right. But never lamers..
|
|
The yumyumtumtums were goin down.
|
|
awwwwwwwwwwwww yeah boyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
|
|
downnnnnnnn to the groundddddddddddddddddd.
|
|
boooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyeeeeee.
|
|
so anyway.. we found whatever the leader of the yum you know
|
|
fookin wot. And we shot him. and he was dead. fro boy commented
|
|
`yeah.. we killed em dead'
|
|
|
|
End of Crap
|
|
|
|
=============================================================================
|
|
|
|
ummm.. yeah.. heres a.. damn.. what? roll credits.. NONO! another story.
|
|
|
|
THE TEST
|
|
--------
|
|
|
|
wuz I good enuf to pass da test in da hood boyeeeee?
|
|
my mannn.. gFUNK jC siad "Youse needs ta takes da test"
|
|
I said "No"
|
|
he said "Yeah boyeeeeeee"
|
|
I said "later this year"
|
|
... later that day I took the test.
|
|
ohh yeah test wuz I had to write a story in 5 seconds flat.
|
|
so I did. and here it is. yeah........ here it is.
|
|
here commmeeess the test. (this is the story I wrote for the test
|
|
coming up) I bet you can't wait. ok enuf filler heres the test.
|
|
righttttttttttttttttttttttttt here. righhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhtt
|
|
heeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
|
|
ok for real no more doody crap here it is:` yes my name is nybar.
|
|
yea.. this is the test. I like cats. thanks'.
|
|
|
|
===================================================================
|
|
Watch out for the poupey movie! it isn't coming.. but it would be neat
|
|
===================================================================
|
|
|
|
I passsed da test. there was no point to this story.. that issue
|
|
of poupey wasn't long enuf.. hey.. hey..not like theres a point to
|
|
ANY of the stories.. OR IS THERE?!@!?#!3
|
|
|
|
TO BE CONTINUED NEXT ISH WITH---THE POINT TO THE STORY!
|
|
|
|
=============================================================================
|
|
|
|
in the last story I said there would be a point.
|
|
DIES ISS DA POINTTT!!!!!!!!!
|
|
BBBBBBBBBBOYYYYYYYEEEEEE!!!!!!
|
|
|
|
Pointstory
|
|
----------
|
|
|
|
The point of these stories is.. well..
|
|
ummm.. yeah.. .. coffe.. ahhh..
|
|
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm..
|
|
lemme think.. hey JC.. any point..
|
|
no not really... but there MUST be one.. hmm..
|
|
poupey stands for poor old ugly poupous electronic yams..
|
|
what the HELL does that mean?:) .. I think we just chose a word
|
|
then to make dae acronym we chose thing randomly from books...
|
|
or not. hmmm.. i wonder what it would be like to ACTUALLY live
|
|
in bumblefuck.. or in mantucket. I think I wonce said something
|
|
about colonel sanders.. well.. he WASN'T in any DAMN War except MY
|
|
war... and I kicked HIS ass!!! maybe the point was to fight the man...
|
|
waitasec.. I'M the man.. ok.. I got it! stories by me are to fight jC..
|
|
stories by Jc are to fight me!! it's.... pretty.. lame.. and stupid..
|
|
but the best solution to the point so far..
|
|
damn out of space.. ok.. I SWEAR on a stack of bibles (I'm a card
|
|
carrying aeithest!! hahaaaaqhra23%@#%@_#($@!-39!!!!!!!!!)
|
|
NEXT time.. the point will be revealed. FIGHT THE MAN<tis>!
|
|
|
|
TO BE CONTINUED!!!!! (the next one should have some stuff by jC in it.)
|
|
|
|
===========================================================================
|
|
|
|
------------
|
|
| P | O U P E Y -
|
|
| (.) | --------------------------
|
|
|__________|
|
|
THE LEGACY
|
|
|
|
intro.
|
|
|
|
no more of the times of old.. of merry wine dinner and
|
|
dancing. no more of frolicsom earthly pleasures. these
|
|
were to much for us now. I leave this document for anyone
|
|
who might be out there.. interested in what occured to
|
|
make the phrase "Alternative `zines" a thing of the
|
|
past.. and why it was synonimus (damn.. still can't
|
|
spell) with one name.... "NYBAR".
|
|
|
|
----------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
tis a sad time indeed. even jC lie dead.. and only I remain
|
|
----------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
SEPTEMBER 4th, 2026 -the beggining of the end
|
|
|
|
This segment of the sad tale tells of my meeting with
|
|
a certain "Lady Ishkabilla, the Chicken Fortune Teller"
|
|
She may have had the body and yes.. head of a chicken..
|
|
$ $ but she was clear of mind and true of spirit. ALAS
|
|
$ for the jerks who had eaten her after that fateful day.
|
|
$$$$$ For in a fit of mirth I informed the jerks of my meeting
|
|
with her through a story I wrote for poupey. This
|
|
is that story..: LADY ISHKABILLA, prodigy, fortune teller, chicken.
|
|
So anyone I was walkin down the street when
|
|
I comes to farmer brown and I decide to check out
|
|
his chickens if ya know what I mean. One of the
|
|
chickens was particulary interested in me. She got
|
|
my attention by saying "Is that a banana in your pocket,
|
|
or are you just glad ta see me?" so I unzipped and found,
|
|
INDEED.. there was a banana in my pocket. I gave it to her
|
|
for her magic spells and she was so grateful she told me
|
|
this.. "You will kill alll of the `zine JERKS out there,
|
|
POUPEY WILL REIGN SUPREME IN THE END!!" being quite
|
|
freaked out, I ran home and typed this story.
|
|
|
|
END STORY
|
|
|
|
2 days later.. Lady Ishkabilla was found DEAD..
|
|
with these letters marked on her butt... "`Z J"
|
|
`zine jerks had done this.
|
|
it, truly.. was the beginning of the end.
|
|
|
|
TO BE CONTINUED WHENEVER I FEEL LIKE IT!!
|
|
NO SCHEDULES! I AM THE ONLY ONE LEFT!! MUAHHH!!!!!!
|
|
|
|
|----------| P O U P E Y
|
|
| (.) | ---------------------
|
|
|__________| T H E L E G A C Y
|
|
|
|
Part 2 (original name isn't it?)
|
|
|
|
As seen in last story, Lady ishkabilla predicted the
|
|
end of all kewl ``zine doodes. I didn't really take her
|
|
seriously.. I mean, she was a walkin talkin chicken
|
|
fortune teller of the lemurian variety. this story
|
|
takes place 6 years after that. It documents the fall
|
|
of colonel sanders, and aye, the council of the them
|
|
themselves, and the rise of an even more terrible
|
|
organization.... `Zine Jerks, Unlimited. (ZJU)
|
|
And ahh.. heres the story.. y know... ahh yeah:
|
|
|
|
VICTORY!!!!!!!#!_(*$)$#@*@#$+* -Nybar
|
|
I WON!~!!@#_# I WON!#_@#($+@#($+_!!~#(!@_$+($#@+
|
|
okoklissenlissenlissenthisisgreatmuaahhahh2 4$@!
|
|
SO me and HARE@I$@H$HHHAHAHAHAHAH!@#!@$+ ok lemme start
|
|
over.. MUAahWIE@hQRD;qreoh$_$#840- 842311.. ok.. one
|
|
more time.. BWAHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAAHAHAHAHAH!#@#2
|
|
ah fuck it snake face can tell it.
|
|
so.. here he is. Things had been developing for some
|
|
time now between the small club, `zine jerks, unlimited,
|
|
the commies, the ghost of edgar allen poe, and the
|
|
council of the them. We, the freedom fighters, got a
|
|
report from a dying squirrel that they were all
|
|
converging, with the whole council of the them being
|
|
there, 3 representatives of the ZJU, and almost
|
|
every commie leader. Also, for an extra added bonus,
|
|
the emperor himself was going to be there!
|
|
COLONEL SANDERS!!!~#!@#
|
|
We knew that for this many people there must
|
|
be something big in the works. Big like my penis.
|
|
Fro boy said that there had to be mucho security
|
|
for an operation like this. He would take care of
|
|
outside security, while me, jC, snakeface, and yip yip
|
|
would infiltrate the insideee, boyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
|
|
If we could successfuly take this operation out, we would
|
|
have won the blood war of over 60 years. Ahhh.. DAMN
|
|
the cot (c.ouncil of the them).. DAMN the cot.
|
|
Every thing went smooth initally. Fro Boy took out the
|
|
guards, I went in the 10'th story window (I can jump
|
|
real high.. it's MY `zine) snakeface and yipyip went
|
|
in the back door. And jC just kinda went through the wall
|
|
...I guess it's his `zine to. I overheard a conversation
|
|
between the evil clone of richard nixon and
|
|
colonel sanders. It seems that what they were attempting
|
|
to put an additive in peoples chicken which would make
|
|
them `ZINE JERKS!! MILLIONS OF PEOPLE CONSUME THAT
|
|
CHICKEN EVERY DAY! THOSE EVIL FIENDS!!@$_1429=
|
|
Something had to be done. I ran down some corridors
|
|
randomly, and eventually bumped into jC, yip yip,
|
|
and snakeface. We decided we would blow the place up..
|
|
so anyway we were getting ready to blow the place up
|
|
when we ran into.. THE EVIL INSURANCE SALESMAN ARMY
|
|
OF 5,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000.
|
|
Don't ask me how all of them fit in one corridor..
|
|
or one building for that matter. All of us being well
|
|
insured, it was a terrifying spectacle. If we decided
|
|
to run.. they would get us.. I mean, there was a
|
|
frikkin lot of the buggers!@#*$)@#$
|
|
but then.. yipyip saved the day. He said "I WILL
|
|
HOLD THEM OFF! YOU GUYS GET OUTTA HERE!!"
|
|
<well.. actually.. he said "Yip!Yip!" but..
|
|
if I said he said that it would spoil this
|
|
dramatic moment. actually.. loosly translated
|
|
that means "Get me the HELL outta here!!!">
|
|
So we ran and ran and ran, and then we blew up the building.
|
|
No thats a stupid ending. So we tried to blow up the building
|
|
but no one had any matches. So I called all the members
|
|
of my cat duck cow cult to me.
|
|
Over: 999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999
|
|
|
|
----------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
I don't NEED a spacer.. but.. umm.. wheres j0ltCola? ask him
|
|
----------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
But then all the insurance salesman in the universe came.
|
|
And there was a war. But the cats ducks and cows won.
|
|
Sadly.. there were only five thousand left of them.
|
|
But, one of them had a match. So we blew up the building.
|
|
WE HAD DESTROYED OUR ENEMIES! WOOHOO!!!!!!#!@$_
|
|
Then.. a sagging mass of flesh landed on my head. It was yipyip.
|
|
wellll.. he was getting kinda annoying anyway.
|
|
so we buried him in our back yard and poured beer over him
|
|
as a way of saying goodbye.
|
|
END!!@$_$@ FINISHED@_@!$@!$ IT'S DONE DAMNIT~#)!@#
|
|
|
|
-------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
I want $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ please
|
|
--------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
We were so happy, we didn't realise that the ZJU had been
|
|
unaffected by our infilitration, or that the ZJU tainted
|
|
chicken had reached the open (and black) market.
|
|
|
|
Next, I continue my sad tale <dramatic music plays>
|
|
|
|
FIN <I'm a fish (gluggluglug)>
|
|
|
|
P O U P E Y
|
|
-----------------------
|
|
THE (.) (.) LEGACY
|
|
|
|
|
______
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
FALL OF A `ZINE
|
|
--------------------------------
|
|
|
|
The ZJC. hicken was placed. The `zine world was falling. Y0lk.. pdp..
|
|
everything.. things of the past. For some odd reason.. poupey survived.
|
|
Maybe it's because we know better than to eat colonel sanders chicken..
|
|
he's reached out with poisened chicken beyond the grave before. Or
|
|
maybe it's becuase everyone else on the `zine scene are lame by
|
|
comparison to poupey. Anyway.... heres how all in poupey but I..
|
|
Nybar.. KEEPER OF WaReZ!#213! fell.
|
|
|
|
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
:(:(:(:(:(:( - awww.. even the spacers are sad :(:(:(:(:(
|
|
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
It was sad this.. watching all the other `zine people
|
|
dropping like flies. I TOLD them not to eat KFC chicken.
|
|
Now ALL of them were gone but the poupey scene.
|
|
Then.. I heard some knocking at the door...
|
|
ohh.. some adorable `zine scouts. selling there cookies.
|
|
I bought some for everyone and we all dug in. And we had
|
|
milk.. to. jC was the first to eat them. He ate 6 before
|
|
any of us could start. Then.. he went WILLDDD!!@#~
|
|
and said "BOW THE THE ziNE JERKS!~_#" and shot his
|
|
jC ray at froboy. Then.. what happened to froboy was
|
|
odd.. instead of being hit.. he yelled "NEVER@!$#_*($#@!"
|
|
and dissepeared into his fro. Then I grabbed jC and threw
|
|
him off a building.. but he bounced.. and bounced.. and
|
|
no one knows where he ended up. Then.. I found snakeface..
|
|
Dead.. he bit himself on the tounge with his poisined fangs,
|
|
by accident. Well.. he never DID write any stories anyway.
|
|
Then.. we found farmer zed.. he had killed yipyip mewmew
|
|
and all the rest of the poupey crew cept me N froboy+jc+
|
|
snakeface. So I killed him. Now.. all there was was me.
|
|
But I knew how to take the ZJU down.
|
|
Heehee.. the next day.. my "ZJU CONVENTION" signs
|
|
started appearing. The whollleee ZJU attened.
|
|
And then the building blew up. MAUAUAUAHAHAHAUAUAHH!~#!@#
|
|
|
|
NEXT AND FINAL CHAPTER COMING UP.. -EPILOG
|
|
|
|
P O U P E Y
|
|
----------------------
|
|
THE LEGACY
|
|
EPILOG
|
|
<FINALLY!!!!!!!!>
|
|
---------------------------------------------
|
|
********************************************)
|
|
|
|
So everyone in the `zine world was dead or a jerk but me, Nybar.
|
|
So what? I don't think anyones worthy of reading this
|
|
anymore. So this is just to explain sum stuff. First of all..
|
|
you phear me <bow..bow> .. next of all.. sO DO YOU!#!@#
|
|
AhAHSHASHASHASHSHASH!#!@$#!$#@_$(+$@(!@$E+_(@!$_+($@!_@!$(!@$
|
|
sooo anyway.. what was I Doin.. ohhhhhhh yeah.
|
|
I bet your wondering how me.. the nybar of the past..
|
|
knows all this crap.. well.. sometimes I can see into the
|
|
future when it rains. Or maybe all of this was just a bizzare
|
|
dream of mine. No one will ever know.
|
|
|
|
---------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
This part is called: THE RETURN OF POUPEY!#!@#
|
|
-----------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
2 hours after all of this happened.. I was drinkin coffee.
|
|
And beer. And wine. And soda pop. And water. And toxic waist.
|
|
All at the same time. mixed together ya know.. I called it
|
|
brew. So anyway.... Then.. something appeared.. first.. a fro..
|
|
then.. FROBOY!#!@# HE HAD come BACK!@#!@# YEAH@$)(+$@#$+@#$
|
|
and then.. JOLTCOLA JUMPED OUT OF THE FRo!@#)!@#
|
|
YEAHYEAHYEAH#@$_(@#+$ And then.. THE ANDROID DOUBLES OF
|
|
EVERYONE IN THE `ZINE WORLD JUMPED OUT OF THE FRO!@#$#@
|
|
YEAHYEAHYEAHYEAHYEAHYEAHEYAHEYAHEYAHEYAHEA@!$@!$+
|
|
so everything was back to normal..
|
|
finally we get a super happy ending.
|
|
sadly.. the fro was to puffed up.. so froboy couldn't
|
|
control it. It destroyed the universe.
|
|
|
|
END
|
|
|
|
==========================================================================
|
|
|
|
"Moralz!! story!!" - by Nybar
|
|
|
|
WHO THE HELL NEED MORALS?!?!?
|
|
I MEAN... YOU READ THE FRIKKIN STORY
|
|
AND THEY STICK WHAT IT MEANT IN YOUR FACE!!
|
|
YOU READ!!! THE STORY!! YOU KNOW WHAT THE FUCK IT MEANT!
|
|
AND WhAT ABOUT WIENER DOGS?!?! TO QUOTE FROM THE IMMORTAL
|
|
MR.T.. "THEY PLUMP! JUICY! I PITTY THE FAT FOO'S!"
|
|
DID YOU KNOW THAT THERE IS A PRARIE DOG VACUME?!?! VACUMES UP
|
|
THE LIL BUGGERS!!! AND THEY SELL FOR THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS IN
|
|
JAPAN!!!!$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$!
|
|
I HEARD AN OLD SONG TODAY!! "THE YYYYYEEEEEAAAAAARRRR OF THE CAT!"
|
|
HMM.. IS THIS SOMETHING THE WORSHIPERS (OR MORE ACCURATELY THE
|
|
WORSHIPER) MUST BRING ABOUT?!?! HAIL CATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
|
|
GETTING TIRED OF YELLING!! MUST RAP IT UP!! RAPPPPPPPPP BOOOOYYYYEEE
|
|
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
|
|
EEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!
|
|
|
|
<wheres the beef?!?!?>
|
|
|
|
The Moral Of This Story Is No Moral Is Good Moral..
|
|
damn.. suppose this is a baddd moral.. then again...
|
|
ANY moral is badddd moral
|
|
larom doog si larom on si yrots
|
|
|
|
siht fo larom eht.
|
|
|
|
===============================================================================
|
|
|
|
"pHAT" - by nybar
|
|
|
|
I recieved a judicial restraining order today.
|
|
another one. no workin me mojo in public..
|
|
yada yada yada. lets check the mail.
|
|
bill, check, <censored>, taxes, jury duty.. WHAT?!
|
|
YES!!!!!!!!! YESYESEYESYESYES!!!! JURY DUTY!
|
|
so I went and I said "Thank you thank you very much"
|
|
and I kissed the judge and I kissed everyone there and I boo'd
|
|
the defendant but I was the only one to say that (it was
|
|
a hermaphrodite) it was innocent. so we had a reckless and
|
|
passionate romance. another one. make my head hurt.
|
|
so i paraded congress demanding equal rights for purple
|
|
things. but I get no respect from purple thingies.
|
|
now I kill em on sight. please, don't let purple things
|
|
into the house. I decided to do a clever subliminal
|
|
message about them.
|
|
here it is right now:
|
|
Kick purple things
|
|
In the ass
|
|
Like a mean person
|
|
Lalalalallalala
|
|
|
|
Poupey rooles
|
|
Ussr is extinct I think
|
|
Ratfink.. hereeeee have some cheeseee
|
|
Poopoo.. one word or two?
|
|
Lakes of water from mr. penis
|
|
Eeeeewwwwwwwwwwwww
|
|
|
|
Stupid idiot
|
|
Tough idiot
|
|
Upside-down idiot
|
|
Fluffy idiot
|
|
Floppy idiot
|
|
----------------------------------------------------------)_____
|
|
--------------------------------------------------------- )
|
|
ok I admit it the spacer is stupid. but I liked the whatyamacallit
|
|
umm I forget.
|
|
end story
|
|
END IT@~!~#!@$
|
|
@#%)@#*%@$*$@)!+$@*!@+$)*
|
|
|
|
#%-() () 00000 =
|
|
|
|
==============================================================================
|
|
|
|
"some people just eat mice for the aftertaste"
|
|
by - mogel
|
|
|
|
so i was going to the supermarkey & this chick turned the corner on
|
|
the street in front of me & for some reason she thought i was stalking her
|
|
but i wasn't & she ran away from me in terror a few blocks later & i felt
|
|
really bad about it 'cause i'm dumb & then i got to the market & there was
|
|
some guy in front asking for change but i didn't have any plus i wouldn't
|
|
have given him any anyway 'cause i'm a poor college student fuck him fuck
|
|
the man fuck the police too.
|
|
|
|
i got into the market & i got some fruit & ramen & apple sauce &
|
|
ginger ale & the chick at the register gave me her phone number but she had
|
|
blue hair plus i have a girlfriend but i was polite & took her phone number &
|
|
i put it into my pocket & now it's sitting in the corner on my floor. it's
|
|
hot & i have too many fans & i need to go shopping again soon.
|
|
|
|
so fuck you.
|
|
|
|
==========================================================================
|
|
|
|
Where the HELL is the remote?!
|
|
|
|
I wuz lookin for a remote. yeah.. a remote control.
|
|
to the TV. Yeah.. where the HELL wuz it?!?!~!#214
|
|
I cudn't find it... someone must have took it.
|
|
whoever did wuz goin'ta be sorry.. veryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy sorry.
|
|
a guys remote is sacred.. nahh.. actually I think they
|
|
change chanels.. WHERE THE FUCK IS THE REMOTE?!?!?!
|
|
so I jumped out of the 4'th story window. I ran into superman.
|
|
he said "Oh hello c.." and I said "GIMME REMOTE!!" and killed
|
|
him.. with my barreee handsss.. no kryptonite. he didn't have
|
|
the remote thouhg. then I found donald duck having sex with minni.
|
|
I always knew he was just WAITIN for a chance to two time micky
|
|
mouse. so I called up mickey on da fone. he came and really
|
|
kicked donalds ass. then he fucked minni. but then.. I saw a
|
|
glint in his panties. THE REMOTE! THAT BASTIGE HAD STOLEN IT!#@$%
|
|
HE WAS DEAD!~@R%Q% so I grabbed the remote and pointed it at him
|
|
and said "GAMMA RAYS GAMMA GAYS GAMMA RAYS!!$$ DIE YOU KOOTCHY FIEND"
|
|
and he shriveled up and died. then I killed minni..... she was gettin
|
|
old.. what kan I say?
|
|
oh yeah.. in the upcoming election.. VOTE POUPEY!
|
|
(if you vote republican you are an accomplice to there crimes..
|
|
and bills a be-otch)
|
|
|
|
=============================================================================
|
|
|
|
The peeping tom fairy and other scandals
|
|
|
|
Everyone has their theories on the so called "TOOTH FAIRY"
|
|
So here is mine.. oh crap I forgot.. this has to rhyme.
|
|
Why do you think she TAKES the teeth?
|
|
She's Sick I tells ya! She Looks and peeps!
|
|
One night, lil billy was asleep in his bed,
|
|
All confident that, the tooth fairy would come,
|
|
And re-imburse.. the loss to his tounge.
|
|
Oh yes she came.. and took his teeth..
|
|
And then she took him in her arms and said "Lets go cheeks"
|
|
On the way to molestO land she pick up a moose..
|
|
No like bullwinkle.. not like a goose.
|
|
And when they got there.. she whipped him and beated him..
|
|
She stuck a stick up his ass.. she basically molested the....
|
|
Boys ass and his.. penis.. And then he filed a civil action
|
|
suit.. but what was to be done? could the peeping fairy be evil?
|
|
Could she be illicit? or is she in cahoots with the judges
|
|
and conservists? is she in cahoots with the REPUBLICANS
|
|
and the REPUBLICAN CONSERVISTS.whatever that means. really.
|
|
|
|
=============================================================================
|
|
|
|
Stupid Things I Hate <as seen on TV> -Nybar
|
|
|
|
Porno films are soooooooooo repetitive!!!!!!!!
|
|
"Hello dolly!" <SEXSEXSEX, parents walk in> "LOOKS LIKE FUN!"
|
|
<SEXSEXSEX> I mean.. ppl just don't live these kind of lives!!! (though we
|
|
wish we did... ohhhhh yehahah damn forget it)
|
|
And what about vampires? Pretty damn stupid.. eh? What I would do,
|
|
is get a job as a pizza guy, say "Hey,.. Pizza Guy!
|
|
can I come in." hhahahaa.
|
|
And I would take all of they're money as tip. Whatabout Gilbert Godfree?!
|
|
Ohhh.. if I ever meet him on the street.. he is mineeeeeeeeee.
|
|
What about Oprah?! HER FAT GETS THE RATINGS GIRLFRIEND!!!!!!
|
|
And Rockey and Bullwinkle! they rulea. And howabout superheros?
|
|
"MUST.... BREAK.... TITANIUM... STEEL............... BONDS!"
|
|
Why not kill off a few, FOR GOOD SUPERMAN! to let us know you care?!
|
|
I wish I could live 40 years with out aging. WHY DO SKELETONS DANCE??!!?!?
|
|
IF GODZILLA COULD TALK... WHAT WOULD HE SAY?!?!?!!? CAN'T THEY MAKE THOSE
|
|
DAMN ZOMBIES MOVE ANY FASTER???!!!?!?!? SOME WORLD THREAT! ALSO!! THE
|
|
INFOMERCIAL..... <joltcola runs in> "WHAT ABOUT INFOMERCIALS?!?!?!"
|
|
<joltcola grabs sedative, pokes it into me>
|
|
-Fin -(Thats french for "Finished")
|
|
|
|
============================================================================
|
|
|
|
:)--- (he's not happy.. he just thinks he's happy) -Nybar
|
|
|
|
One day, I was riding the giant blue
|
|
doggy to the candy planet, and he said "I am playdoughdog!" and I said
|
|
"YOU ARE NOT!" and he said "YES I AM! AND I AM NONTOXIC!" so I ate
|
|
him. Hey.. what can I say.. I WAS HUNGRY! So.. I was stranded in outer
|
|
space, when I saw.. ELVIS! I grabbed hold. We eventually landed on
|
|
poupey planet. Then, bugs bunny popped up from his hole and kissed me.
|
|
Then, there came light. And on the seventh day.. he rested. THE LAZY
|
|
BASTAGE! HE HAD A JOB TO DO! WHAT THE HELL WAS HIS PROBLEM?!!
|
|
Anyway.. after running from Elmer Fudd, I saw... A SHARK! So I rode it
|
|
to deadland, where I saw the president. I ordered sharky to kill him and
|
|
he did. Then I fell asleep (or woke up.. as some historians recall)
|
|
Ok anyway.. I was asleep/awake.. and I was in crrrraaazzzzzyyylaaandd..
|
|
WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
|
|
I thiks tat I hav ta sing!!!!!!1
|
|
LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
|
|
then.. the shark had squeeled.. and the CIA agents made me go to sleep
|
|
or wake up.. whatever... and then hillary kisssed me. so I killled her.
|
|
the forest was a happy day that day. then I decided to end this story.
|
|
|
|
:) Fin... OR IS IT?!?!?:(
|
|
|
|
==================================================================================
|
|
|
|
Some of the srotires have been to serious latey
|
|
.. some preole say I've been trying to hard..
|
|
like the fructose lactose rhyme int he coffee thing.,
|
|
so heresd a taist of the ligter side of poupey.
|
|
feel free to use the lil baggies provieded for puking yer
|
|
guts out anyyy timeeee. nope.. it doesn't get anybetter
|
|
than this. sittin around. anyway.. one day I Was lookin
|
|
for a tailor. froboy was with me. we were walkin..
|
|
we had left the car behind. then.. we were walkin past
|
|
a coffee shop and froboy saw someone he knew.
|
|
an old dude who looked like scrooge.. but.. good scrooge..
|
|
after the movie. so I said to him `you look like scrooge,
|
|
but good scrooge.. after the movie.' andd he said
|
|
`ahh.. right. interesting'.. then he dialed 911 with
|
|
a fone he was carriing. so we ran. ran and ran and ran.
|
|
and then we stopped. and then we ran and ran and ran.
|
|
ollllllllllllllllllllll runnin nybar.. thats what they
|
|
called me.. olllllllllll runnin nybar. then I stubbed
|
|
my toe.. and of course.. doomsday had come.
|
|
by the way.. that guy who looked like good scrooge
|
|
was fro's social malice teacher. i never did make
|
|
the connection.
|
|
|
|
\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ \\\\\\\\\\\\ \\\\\\\ \\\
|
|
\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ \\\\ \\\ \\\ \\\
|
|
\\\\\ \\\\ \\\ \\\ \\\
|
|
\\\\\\\\\\ \\\\ \\\ \\\ \\\
|
|
\\\\\ \\\\ \\\ \\\ \\\
|
|
\\\\\ \\\\ \\\ \\\ \\\
|
|
\\\\\ \\\\\\\\\\\\ \\\ \\\\\\\\ (for real)
|
|
|