71 lines
4.5 KiB
Plaintext
71 lines
4.5 KiB
Plaintext
Û Û [MiLK] Û Û
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Û Û Û Û
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Û Û Mighty Issue #18 Û Û
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Û²²²²²²²²²Û illicit "Lemmy" Û²²²²²²²²²Û
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Û²²²²²²²²²Û Liquid By Igor Shimsky Û²²²²²²²²²Û
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Û²²²²²²²²²Û Kollections Û²²²²²²²²²Û
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Û²²²²²²²²²Û Û²²²²²²²²²Û
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ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ
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Hello, my name is Lemmy. And I am a computer virus! Well most people think
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of virii that go around deleting files and infecting memory, but I don't do
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that. See I'm not a mean virus, but I'm a friendly one that really has a
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sense of humor! Well to tell you about my past, I was created by the Virus
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Creation Utility that some human downloaded from a BBS somewhere. He finally
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made me to infect the FAT of a hard disk one day, but I the first cluster that
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I hit was one of Leisure Suit Larry! I was still a young impressionable
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virus that wa still open to new ideas. Well anyway after looking at the files
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I realized, erasing and deletion isn't what I wanted to do! So I display some
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letter on the CON driver that really seemed to piss off the human! He put in
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a program by McAfee to seek and destroy me, but the dumbass human didn't
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realize, was that I was just made, and virtually undetectable! So anyway.
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Now I spend most of my time on a computer of a friendly female human that likes
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the same kind of music I do, and well we just get along real well! Our
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favorite song is the one from Second Reality of the Future Crew, but that's
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off topic. I jump around her C: drive sometimes, I lay around in the data,
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and every once in a while I jump around over her nice new modem to other
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computers! Well the sysops of the BBSs don't know about me, but I don't cause
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too much chaos! Until one day, when I landed on a evil computer that had these
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really bad virii on. First that captured me, and took me to their high virus.
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The ruler virus asked me where I came from, and it turns out, both of us were
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created by the same guy. I was an outlaw, because I was an anarchist virus!
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I did the opposite of what viruses were supposed to do! So anyway, the high
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virus got some of his guard files to torture me! First they compressed me,
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all of a sudden, I was no longer a COM file, but I was a squooshed ARJ file!
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At least they could've had some respect and used ZIP to squish me! So anyway,
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here I am 62% of my original size, they they sent me to LPT1 a couple times,
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then they took the hard copy file maker thing that humans call printers (I
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can't to this day figure out why), but then they did a real cruel thing, they
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connected the printer to COM2!!! Then they sent me one bit at a time to the
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hard copy thing! I was so embarassed! They they uncompressed me, they ran
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me through a compiler! And they started looking at me insides! OUCH!!! I
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was so violated! Then as I couldn't take it anymore, the virus police
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came through and killed all the evil virii! Since I was now a ASM file, the
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virus police didn't get me. So there I sat for weeks un-assmebled! One day,
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the human of the computer came and found me. He didn't remember me, so he
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compiled me, and then when he found out I was a virus, he called in the virus
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police. It was too late, I already jumped on COM1 and was out in the phone
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line somewhere! I didn't know where I was, and I didn't know how I'd get
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home, but thats a different story! I hope you had a load of fun reading about
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my adventure, I think I'll go get some MiLK, and maybe I'll tell you another
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story on another MiLK carton!
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ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ[MiLK] InformationÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ
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[MiLK] Sights - WHQ - Barney's Pleasure Palace! (708)965-3098
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DiSt- The Lunatic Phringe (708)232-0565
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Mech World (708)757-0116
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The Acropolis (708)557-2826
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[MiLK] Member Listing -
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James Hetfield Plaid Wilderbeast Medicine Man
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Nyarlathotep Mendeleev Igor Shimsky
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Epic Black Justice Stash
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[MiLK] Issue Number - 21
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[MiLK] Issue Size - 4619 Bytes
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[MiLK] Date of Production: 3/22/93
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ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ Long Live The Machine ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ
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