95 lines
5.6 KiB
Plaintext
95 lines
5.6 KiB
Plaintext
Û Û [MiLK] Û Û
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Û Û Û Û
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Û Û Mighty Issue #14 Û Û
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Û²²²²²²²²²Û illicit "Wank Bunny" Û²²²²²²²²²Û
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Û²²²²²²²²²Û Liquid By James Hetfield Û²²²²²²²²²Û
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Û²²²²²²²²²Û Kollections Û²²²²²²²²²Û
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Û²²²²²²²²²Û Û²²²²²²²²²Û
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ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ
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The Drooling Jaws of the Mammoth Wolf grip upon my neck. I am finished.
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There is no escaping now. The end has come, there is no way out. Is there
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any way I could have avoided this? Any way I could have changed fate? Any
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way I could have been saved?
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Let me explain How I got myself into this mess. I am your typical Poofy
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White Bunny Rabbit; I hop around all day, wiggling my little poofy tail all
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along the way. And I tend not to cause any problems with people. In fact,
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people seem to like me, for the most part. Humans call me cute, and the
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little humans try to catch me and shit, but then I bite them and they run
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away. I'm sick of those stupid little humans trying to pick me up and crap,
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what the hell is in their head? Oh well, anyways, everyone tends to like me,
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except those damn Wolves and Foxes. Wolves and foxes don't like me. At all.
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Or maybe it is they like me TOO much. You see, they want to eat me. Now I
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don't get this eating other animal bullshit, it's all greek to me, but hey,
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it's their perogitive. But they want to eat ME, you see, and that kinda erks
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me a tad. So I tend to stay away from them. Not because I don't like them,
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not at all... I just, well, don't understand them, and they don't understand
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me. They always try to eat me! Argh... Ok, to go on, the other Rabbits like
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to call me "Wank Bunny"... Don't ask me why, they just think "Wank" is this
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really cool word. So I'm Wank Bunny. I'm Wank Bunny, the white bunny rabbit
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that everyone (except the fuckin' foxes and wolves) get along with.
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Well, as you might guess, I LOVE carrots. But I also LOVE oranges.
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Don't ask me why, it's just a fetish. None of the other bunnies like them,
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but I do. I love 'em. They all call me weird and wanker and shit, but I
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don't mind. They're real good tasten. The only problem with Oranges is
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they're a pain to peel. Oh yeah, and the only way to get them up here in
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Chicago (where I live) is to sneak into the big human food places and roll
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them out with me. And humans laugh at me when they see me roll away with an
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orange, but I don't care. The orange is worth it. Okay, as I was saying, I
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love carrots too. And this day was a special day or something because the
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doors on the humans food place were locked and no one was going in or out, so
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I had to get some carrots from a humans food growing place by where I live.
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No big deal, I do it all the time. This day, however, one of those little
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humans caught me. And I didn't get away, because I had pigged out on Oranges
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the previous day, which slowed me down it seems. So this stupid little female
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human was trying to talk to me and shit, she had her face in mine making all
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these idiotic faces at me, like I'm gonna find HER cute or something... yuck.
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Humans are disgusting bloated sacks of protoplasm, that's what they are. So
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she has her face up in mine, so I bite her nose, hoping she'd drop me and
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stuff. But she didn't. It just made her mad, and she brought me into her big
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human place and threw me into a closed room. That kinda pissed me off,
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because it was a small place with furry ground and very little room to roam
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around. I hated it, as you can tell. so then big humans came into the room,
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grabbed me, and threw me into this CAGE! I was their captive; their prisoner!
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I had to get out; I had to escape! so when they brought me back outside in
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the cage a few hours later, i bashed my body against the cage and broke the
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lock. Then I ran for my dear life. Hopped, moreoever. I'm not a good
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runner, not many bunnys are, but I'm a great hopper. So I hopped for dear
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life. I hopped until I couldn't hop no more. Then I hopped some more. By
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the time I was all hopped out I was in the forest, where a lot of my friends
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lived. I decided to go find a few of them and hang out with them for the day.
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That's where this wolf guy comes in. I was so tired out, when he jumped
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out at me, I had no where to go. I was too winded to run away. So here I am,
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about to be eaten, and I can't do a flying fuck about it. You know, life
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really sucks sometimes.
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--- Will Wank Bunny Survive the Wolf? ---
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--- Will The Evil Humans Recapture him? ---
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--- Will You Have Herpes from that One Night stand last Oct.? ---
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All these, and more questions, will be answered in the Next
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exciting "Wank Bunny" text file!
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-MiLK- '94
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ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ[MiLK] InformationÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ
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[MiLK] Sights - Barney's Pleasure Palace! (708)965-3098
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The Lunatic Phringe (708)232-0565
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[MiLK] Member Listing - James Hetfield
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Nyarlathotep
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Epic
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Plaid Wilderbeast
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Mendeleev
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[MiLK] Issue Number - 14
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[MiLK] Issue Size - 5750 Bytes
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[MiLK] Date of Production: 2/24/93
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ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄSnoopy Is A Demi-God; Just Ask Him!ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ
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