149 lines
4.8 KiB
Plaintext
149 lines
4.8 KiB
Plaintext
And now, its time for (*drum roll*)....
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M I K E ' S M A D N E S S # 4
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HOW MUCH DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THE MODERN WORLD
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1) $3,000,000,000,000 is . . .
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a) The amount of the national debt
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b) The cost to deploy SDI
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c) The first figure Robin Given's mother said.
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2) Many teenage blacks take great pride in . . .
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a) Martin Luther King Jr.
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b) Jessie Jackson
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c) Having a car-stereo that can be heard over an Ozzy concert
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3) With computers, you can . . .
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a) Work at home
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b) Balance whole financial empires
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Get fucked by the Government twice as fast as before
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4) Roosevelt is tied to the war years like Reagan is tied to . . .
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a) The first strong 8-year Presidency
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b) The age when America got her respect back
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c) Every fucking problem in the last eight years
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5) The main outcome of World War II was . . .
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a) The establishment of the mean for global government
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b) The beginning of Soviet expansion over Europe
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c) The Japanese own Hawaii, the Germans own the East Coast and the British
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are giving us the finger.
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6) Nuclear weapons . . .
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a) Can provide the ultimate deterence for war
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b) Will be a big part of US/Soviet relations into the 21'st century
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c) Can fuck your day when used incorrectly
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7) Modern growth in sign language is best presonified by . . .
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a) The large number of colleges that offer degrees in dactology
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b) The fact many sign language symbols, like love, have been adopted by culture
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c) The number of people you flipped off going down the freeway today
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8) The 60's are best explained by the saying:
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a) "Make love, not war"
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b) "Tune in, turn on, drop out"
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c) "Got any dope?"
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9) The biggest threat to society today is . . .
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a) The omnipresent threat of nuclear war
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b) The growth of urban gangs
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c) Elvis impersonators
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10) The insult heard most around the world is . . .
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a) "May Allah curse your wife!"
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b) "Your mother!"
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c) "American!"
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Here's a test to determine how much you know about Political Science
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1) The PLO claims parts of Isreal as its own. This is an example of:
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a) An irredentist claim
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b) A seperatist claim
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c) Why flying to Europe ain't such a hot idea anymore
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2) The 1'st US fleet is sitting off the Libyan coast. This means:
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a) Libya is making claims on international waters
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b) The US is making its presence known
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c) The US finally figured out who downed that plane over Scotland
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3) The Hind is to Warsaw Pact troops as the Apache is to:
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a) NATO troops
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b) The US Marines
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c) Fraud
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4) If a piece of military hardware fails in testing . . .
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a) It is reworked and tested again
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b) Examined by Congress before further monies are spent
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c) It will be in world-wide usage before the year is over
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5) Boeing is known for
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a) Huge airplane sales that aid the US economy vastly
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b) State-of-the-art military technology
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c) Screwing the taxpayers
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6) The NRA is an example of
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a) A P.A.C.
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b) A nonpartisan, yet very strong, coalition
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c) A group of people who are a hazard to themselves and others
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7) The JDL is an example of
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a) an Ethic PAC
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b) A group trying to protect the rights of a minority
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c) Totalitarianism with a new name
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8) Most people greet their congressman . . .
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a) With a smile and firm handshake
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b) With congratulations on the newest bill the congressman is trying to pass
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c) By yelling "CROOK!"
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9) Fraud, lying and theft are examples of
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a) Behavior not tolerated by democratic personalities
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b) Hallmark behavior of authoritarian personalities
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c) Politics at their best
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10) Culture is . . .
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a) the answers that a group of people come up with to meet the challenges of
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survival
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b) The basis of all political interaction
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c) Wholly lacking in Sacramento, CA
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11) Hitler is an example of
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a) A dictator
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b) A minor political figure who rose in the ranks to a world power
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c) The perfect NRA member
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12) Most Republicans are
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a) Wealthy, from the upper middle class
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b) Politically active within their community
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c) Sadly misguided
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13) Gun control is
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a) A popular topic of political conversation
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b) A decision for the Judicial branch
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c) Being able to hit your target
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14) The struggle of Class vs. Class is a ________ struggle?
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a) Political
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b) Marxist/Leninist
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c) Typical Valley Highschool
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15) If you have 1 dollar, you . . .
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a) Are a participant in the world economy
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b) Have about 800 Pesos
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c) Will probably get killed in Oak Park
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16) The biggest probability of a nuclear exchange could result from
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a) A Soviet invasion of Iran
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b) US involvement in a Persian Gulf conflict
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c) Dan Quaile becoming President
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(C) 1989 Yucks for You, Inc.
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