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textfiles/magazines/IBFT/ibft042.txt
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_____________________________________________________________________________
---------------------------- I Bleed for This? ------------------------------
------04.07.96-----------------------------------------------------#042------
Halloween IRC 1994
by IBFT
The log file you're about to read was recorded on the Internet Relay Chat,
Halloween night in 1994. Cruel attempts to piss off drones who should
probably be doing something more productive anyway. Harmless stress-relief
at the expense of robots who don't have enough excitement in their lives.
Putting pathetic, pretentious freaks in their place is illegal? Well don't
tell me about it. I reserve the right to say these things whenever I want
to, nothing you say or do can stop me or even hope to shut me up for as much
as a single second. We harass without regard to any claims of innocence the
"victims" might try to make, we lewdly harass women and children, lesbians,
Asians, bored people; people talking about love as soon as people talking
about drugs. Fuck them all, with any luck they'll end up under a stinking
heap of rotting human remains sooner rather than later. But aside from
that fantasy, reality is more cruel than anything I could come up with.
They will all get what they deserve: a dull, vaguely paranoid existence
punctuated by moments of intense ignorance, terror and self-doubt. Every
day until they die.
Those of you with social lives probably haven't used IRC. The main thing for
you to understand is that since this is a log of Farnon's session, his name
doesn't appear when he says things. Stuff he says just has a ">" in front of
it.
IRC log started Mon Oct 31 19:40
*** Value of LOG set to ON
*** tuthfairy (~jason@TRAD.PC.CC.CMU.EDU) has joined channel #love
*** Users on #love: tuthfairy Smurf Natureboy FANTASY tsab spot gorgeous
braids pandora alladin hawk Nettie Jay SHITHACK Guardian
<alladin> hi smurf
<Smurf> TRCI or treat
> trick or treat!!!
<spot> fantasy where you from?
*** goo (khan0034@goldx.tc.umn.edu) has joined channel #love
<alladin> hi tuth fairy
> give me candy please.
*** Bagel (GC941216@pacevm.dac.pace.edu) has joined channel #love
***ACTION alladin wants a trick
> i am an adorable tooth fairy.
***ACTION Jay gives smurf candies
<FANTASY> *FANTASY's here time to go on a fantastic voyage!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*** CDMan (~cs1cx@altair.herts.ac.uk) has joined channel #love
<Smurf> hello! I'm here for the candy
<pandora> cool pandora is seeing it for the 3rd time on Feb 19
> candies? why dont i get any candies?
> candies please!
***ACTION sp0t is back.
***ACTION Smurf munches on the goodies. *yum!*
> can i have some too
<Smurf> Thank you Jay!
> please?!
*** tsab has left channel #love
*** spot has left channel #love
***ACTION alladin hands out mars bars
<Smurf> those were good
<FANTASY> spot: i'm fr st john's newfoundland,canada
<pandora> man i am so tired i cant even type write tonight
<braids> Drew,you still there
*** Signoff: Bagel (Bagel)
> mars bars. GIVE ME SOME REAL FUCKING CANDY OR I CUT OF A FINGER ASSHOLE
<alladin> pandora: you should relax
> this is putrid shit i wouldnt give to my worst enemies
***ACTION Jay wants candies too!!!!
> you assholes
> give me candy please!
*** Signoff: Natureboy (Leaving)
> give me candy please!
<Smurf> my smurf intestines are not feeling good...
<FANTASY> forget candies
<Smurf> THAT WAS BAD CXASNDY
***ACTION alladin thinks tuthfairy needs some help
<Smurf> i feel so sick
> before i knock all your fucking teeth out
*** Ann (~---------@146.229.4.234) has joined channel #love
<hawk> I am sick too..
> candy please.
<alladin> hi ann
***ACTION Smurf excretes diarhea all over jay
<hawk> I want ann
<Jay> what's wrong? smurf
<pandora> hey alladin what year are you?
* tuthfairy licks up the diarhea. now thats a treat!
*** binge (robtp@CSOS.ORST.EDU) has joined channel #love
<alladin> pandora: first you
<Ann> hi
*** Ann has left channel #love
> you fed him shit you asshole
***ACTION Smurf barfs burritos, almonds and sand all over jay
*** FANTASY has left channel #love
<Smurf> I will sue you black ass
<binge> ooooh
*** braids has left channel #love
<pandora> i am a freshman in college
* tuthfairy finds razor in his mars bar
<Smurf> YOU cannnot fuck over a smurf like that!
> you fucking asshole, you trying to kill me.
<alladin> pandora: cool what's your major
<Smurf> don't you know there are laws?
*** gorgeous has left channel #love
> im going to rape your cat. THATS MY TRICK YOU ASSHOLE
> give me *real* candy please
<hawk> guys dont' respond.. it won't solve anything
***ACTION Smurf rapes your cat with a brick
*** binge has left channel #love
> CANDY PLAEsE
> please
*** Sailor (Msinclair@sl02-075.sunbelt.net) has joined channel #love
<Smurf> TRICXK!!! hahaa funny trick
> no one will give me candy?
> you are not nice
> ANOTHER TRICK
<pandora> i donlt know yet possibly education- you didn;t answer me
* tuthfairy smashes a bottle of gin of hawk's head
> FUNNY TRICK. NO
***ACTION Smurf pulls a treat from the gooey depths of jay's asshole
> WHAT A YUMMY TREAT
> HOW COME I DONT GET A TREAT LIKE THAT
<Jay> what wrong with u smurf
* tuthfairy yanks out jay's colon
***ACTION Smurf puts a coat hanger through pandora's cheek
> NOW THERE IS A TREAT
> WHAT A TRICK
***ACTION Smurf chews on pandora's eye
* tuthfairy puts pandora's blood in a jar.
> yum. AIDS juice! what a treat.
> these are real treats. THANK YOU SO MUCH
*** Sailor has left channel #love
<Smurf> YOU ARE very kind people to give us such treats.
> thank you
<pandora> dont eat me dammit
> we must go onto the next house
*** Ergoscene (jmdp@ix-dc4-27.ix.netcom.com) has joined channel #love
***ACTION Smurf vomits the treats through his nose
<hawk> tuthfairy and smurf are gay lovers.. just having some fun
> shut u. your twat smells like a fish market bitch
<Smurf> until next year.
> HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!!!
*** pit (~pph3dxd@cabell.vcu.edu) has joined channel #love
*** Smurf has left channel #love
*** tuthfairy has left channel #love
*** tuthfairy (~jason@TRAD.PC.CC.CMU.EDU) has joined channel #halloween
*** Topic for #halloween: The light grows dim... time for the scare of
your lives!!! >;)
*** Users on #Halloween: tuthfairy Butt-head bastdave Rookie NIN succubus
Aeneas Freddy_K Zod Psalm69 rbDAVE tr3murs @vampiress
*** Snoopy (sna@xxxxxx) has joined channel #halloween
<Freddy_K> hi rookie, don't go to sleep tonight
> TRICK OR TREAT!!!
> TRICK OR TREAT!!!
*** Freddy_K is now known as DrmMaster
> SMELL MY FEET
<Snoopy> TRICK OR TREAT!!!!!!!!!!!
<Butt-head> I laff at flasherz
> GIVE ME SOMETHING GOOD TO EAT!!!
<Aeneas> all new episodes tonight]
<Snoopy> Some candy please.
***ACTION NIN calls upon the powers of darkness to give this damn channel
an attitude adjustment. <grin>
<Rookie> why not freddyk
> candy please please.
<DrmMaster> toothfairy sucks
<Snoopy> ANYone gonna give me any candy?
<vampiress> sheesh thats loud
<Zod> succ: why don't you believe me, must I prove to you that I'm
telePATHETIC!!??!! :)
> give me candy now assholes before i bash your teeth in
*** xyzzy (~skip@d252.claris.com) has joined channel #halloween
<tr3murs> feet r yummy: tuthfairy:)
<Snoopy> SNOOPY DOES NOT ASK TWICE FOR CANDY
***ACTION NIN give snoopy a candy bar.
<Butt-head> uh... I got something good for you to eat... huh huh huh huh
*** succubus has left channel #halloween
<DrmMaster> you're hyper
<rbDAVE> NIN: hmmm, i once was all alone and felt a presence in the family
room. i turned off the tv and a very evil image appeared when i
turned it off
***ACTION Aeneas gives regurgitated candy corn
> SNOOPY I THINK EE WILL HAVE TO KICK ASS
<tr3murs> hi B_H
> you bitch i \dont want your candy corn diarhea
*** Anonymity (stickney@carins.cariboo.bc.ca) has joined channel #halloween
***ACTION Snoopy shits in a paper bag and lights it on fire
> give us real fucking candy
<Snoopy> STOMP IT OUT NIG
> STOP IT YOU STINGY FUCKS
***ACTION NIN gives tuthfairy something to suck on.
> STOMP ON IT YOU STINGY FUCKS
*** DrmMaster is now known as Freddy_K
<Snoopy> i want lots of candy and right now
<Snoopy> please
<Snoopy> a lot of it
> give me candy
<Freddy_K> i will step on it
*** griffin (~gryphon@netcom15.netcom.com) has joined channel #halloween
<Snoopy> NO ROCKS I KILL YU)
> we are nice little boys
> give us candy please please please
> we have been good
<Aeneas> now there's a spoiled child
<Freddy_K> no candy for you guys, you're little pricks
<Anonymity> wow, two daves from cariboo on here :)
<NIN> That is just toooooo fascinating rbdave.
<rbDAVE> did anyone read my scary story :(
<Freddy_K> wow.
> FUCK YOU ASSHOLE ILL RIP YOUR MOMS TEETH OUT
*** Mode change "+o tr3murs" on channel #Halloween by vampiress
> retreat
<Snoopy> I WILL BURN YOUR HOUSE DOWN
***ACTION Anonymity sprays everyone with the garden hose.
-> *Snoopy* retreat
<Aeneas> she wears dentures
*** Snoopy has left channel #halloween
*** tuthfairy has left channel #halloween
*** tuthfairy (~jason@TRAD.PC.CC.CMU.EDU) has joined channel #gayteen
*** Users on #gayteen: tuthfairy @gadg Per_G Prism @answer
@Valis @Vasha ClearlyJa
> TRICK OR TREAT!!!!!
*** Snoopy (sna@xxxxxx) has joined channel #gayteen
> give me candy please. TRICK OR TREAT!!
*** rink (u9352473@rabble.uow.edu.au) has joined channel #gayteen
<Snoopy> TRICK OR TREAT
> give us candy please.
*** rink has left channel #gayteen
#gayteen Snoopy H sna@xxxxxx (LKJHDLK)
#gayteen tuthfairy H ~jason@TRAD.PC.CC.CMU.EDU (Jason Farnon)
#gayteen gadg H@ ~gadg@umrolla2-slip16.cc.umr.edu (Using the
Grapevine Amiga IRC client (AmiTCP)!)
#gayteen Per_G H cooke@HERCULES.CS.UREGINA.CA (Roxette.rules!=)
#gayteen Prism H ~eclipse@shell1.msn.fullfeed.com (Reality? What's
that???)
#gayteen answer H@ answer@question.tiac.net (Alone, always and
forever...)
#gayteen Valis H@ valis@oak.liii.com (the divine invasion!)
#gayteen Vasha H@ vasha@hydra.cs.unc.edu (#gayteen is cool)
#gayteen ClearlyJa G ~root@ocd.loni.ucla.edu (Jay Carlyle)
*Freddy_K* come back on #halloween
<Snoopy> Hello, gay teens. am i cute enough to get your candy?
<Snoopy> shave off a piece of your candy ass and put it in this here
pillowcase
<Snoopy> NOW
<Snoopy> CANDY
*** Zug (~zheyman@orion.it.luc.edu) has joined channel #gayteen
> NO I THINK THEY ONLY GIVE CANDY TO FAGGOTS WITH BLOOD DRIPPING OUT OF
THEIR BUTTS
<Snoopy> do not make me play a trick
> WE WANT CANDY NOW BUTRAPERS
> TRICK OR FUCKING TREAT!!
*** Signoff: Zug (Leaving)
<Prism> I'm not amused.
> TRICK OR TREAT!
*** Snoopy has been kicked off channel #gayteen by gadg (Take it outside.)
> prism can i please have some candy?
***ACTION Snoopy pukes sand and cottage cheese all over prism
*** Snoopy (sna@xxxxxx) has joined channel #gayteen
***ACTION Snoopy pukes sand and cottage cheese all over prism
* tuthfairy farts on prism
<Snoopy> TRICK!!
<Snoopy> fucker
*** Snoopy has been kicked off channel #gayteen by gadg (Take it outside.)
> thats what you get for not giving me candy
*** Snoopy (sna@xxxxxx) has joined channel #gayteen
> ill knock all your fucking teeth out
<Snoopy> I played a trick now please give me something to eat
<Snoopy> and it betyer not be your dick
> we are joking
> this is our trick
<Snoopy> TREAT PLEASE
> we were joking
> NOW TREAT
<Prism> Ho hum.
<Snoopy> you suck.
*** tuthfairy has left channel #gayteen
*** tuthfairy (~jason@TRAD.PC.CC.CMU.EDU) has joined channel #drugs
*** Users on #drugs: tuthfairy Alexis Monk @Pops
Lysergic @KevinTX @Wowbagger @JS @Sharp @FryBot
> TRICK OR TREAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*** Smurf (sna@xxxxxx) has joined channel #drugs
<Alexis> tell me
<Smurf> TRICK OR TREAT
> give me candy pleae.
<Smurf> anyone have candy for me?
<Smurf> Smurfs play nasty tricks
> candy! candy! candy!
<Alexis> we're closed
<Smurf> I WILL CRAWL UP YOUR ASS IF YOU don't give me CANDY!
<Alexis> go away
> GIVE US CANDY PLEASE
<JS> lysergic is the tantric druggie bhodisatva
<Smurf> i could do it too cuz i am a smurf
<Smurf> CANDY NOW
<Smurf> treats
<Smurf> please
> ill rip all your fucking teeth out you nig if you dont give me candy
> GIVE ME CANDY NOW
> TRICK OR TREAT!!!
*** Wowbagger has changed the topic on channel #drugs to
<Smurf> I WILL CRAWL UP YOUR ASS IF YOU don't give me CANDY!
***ACTION Smurf shits on your kitchen table
> candy please
<JS> Is this 'trick or dork'?
*** Alexis has left channel #drugs
> JS i will kill your parents if you dont give me candy
*** Alexis (hrhardy@vax1.acs.jmu.EDU) has joined channel #drugs
<Smurf> CANDY NOW
> TRICK OR TREAT
<Smurf> snickers dammit
> TREATS PLEASE
> i want m&ms
<Smurf> cough it up fucker
<Smurf> !!!!!
> they melt in my crotch
> DO WE HAVE TO DO THIS AT GUNPOINT? I CAN BE NICE ABOUT THIS
<Smurf> lay me a baby ruth you asshole
***ACTION KevinTX is back and beginning to get fucked up!
> now MOTHERFUCKERSD
<Smurf> DO NOT MAKE SMURF PLAY A TRICK
> Kevin give us fucking candy
> i will yank your colon out and choke you with it
<Wowbagger> Go away assmunch.
> THAT IS MY TRICK. YES.
<Smurf> don't make me ream you with oyur wooden leg
> GIVE US CANDY
*** Mode change "+bb *!*@*.CC.CMU.EDU *!*@*.amherst.edu" on channel #drugs
by KevinTX
<Smurf> nig!
> I WILL STICK Y MAGIC WAND IN YOUR TWAT
<Smurf> CANDY now
<Smurf> !
<JS> what a freakfest
<KevinTX> try #twilight_zone, i hear they have good candy.
> NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW
<Lysergic> your going to go...
> GIVE ME FUCKING CANDY NOW
<Smurf> !
<Lysergic> get it...
<Smurf> fucking snickers
<Smurf> !
<Smurf> NOW
<Lysergic> get it...
*** Smurf has been kicked off channel #drugs by JS (BlueTurdule)
<Wowbagger> #twilight_zone has awesome candy
<Lysergic> gone..
* tuthfairy farts on wowbagger
*** You have been kicked off channel #drugs by KevinTX (<lAm3>)
*** #drugs :Sorry, cannot join channel. (Banned from channel)
*** tuthfairy (~jason@TRAD.PC.CC.CMU.EDU) has joined channel #lesbian
*** Users on #lesbian: tuthfairy yummy billion showme @Ntropy
renee @chiquita SLVRFOX C1audia
*** Smurf (sna@xxxxxx) has joined channel #lesbian
*** CptMorgan (dmacleod@hopi.gate.net) has joined channel #lesbian
<chiquita> why isn't anyone else talking
<Smurf> trick or treat!
> TRICK OR TREAT!!!!!
<chiquita> trick
<Ntropy> hello chaquita
<Smurf> TRICK OR TREAT
> WHAT IS THE TRICVK
<Smurf> Hello
> Can I have some candy please.
<chiquita> hi partner
<chiquita> lick me first
<Smurf> do you have any candy for us IRC trick or treaters?
<CptMorgan> hello and happy helloween
*Smurf* yes! they are biting
<Smurf> cpt morgan, any candy?
> candy please
<Smurf> i have not gotten very much yet
> i like baby ruth
<yummy> chiquita say something interesting about yourself
> please no razor blades either. mom told me about them
*** yummy has left channel #lesbian
<CptMorgan> smurt: lots of candy !!! :)
<Smurf> please no birth control pills
> can i have candy too?
<chiquita> yummy first turn me on
> please. please please!
<Smurf> cptmorgan: what do you have for us?
*** Ntropy has changed the topic on channel #lesbian to Trick or Treat
> ntropy do you have any candy?
<CptMorgan> smuft: i have a lot of treats]
> what kind of treats do you have?!
<Ntropy> yeah :)
> i am a cute and adorable tooth fairy.
***ACTION CptMorgan is :*)
> what do you have for us good children?
<Smurf> someone give me a butterfingfer
<Smurf> butterfinger
> candy please!!
<CptMorgan> smurf: i have a finger
*** yummy (rdrive01@msuacad.morehead-st.edu) has joined channel #lesbian
*** Fungoo (shadow@iceworld.iceworld.org) has joined channel #lesbian
> a finger?
*** Fungoo has left channel #lesbian
> all i want is some candy.
> please please?
<chiquita> give me two or three fingers
> you fucking dyke give me candy
<CptMorgan> tuthfairy: well you know what i mean :(
<chiquita> Ntrophy is a master guy
<Smurf> you bitches better give me your butterfingers
<chiquita> he's cool
> before i shove the indigop girls so far up your ass theyll
be way fucking up there
<yummy> showme happy halloween
<Smurf> NOW goddamit
* tuthfairy farts on the lesbos
> THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENDS WHEN YOU DONT GIVE US TREATS
***ACTION Smurf shits on your doorstep
> YOU STUPID FUCKINT CUNTS
<Smurf> DO NOT TAUNT SMURFS
<Ntropy> hehe :)
> ill kill your parents, i need money. ill take all their teeth
> GIVE US FUCKING CANDY *NOW*
<Smurf> TREATS NOW or i cut your hair
*** sxe1 (~JIOVINO@rose.ucs.indiana.edu) has joined channel #lesbian
<sxe1> hello
<Smurf> no treats from yoiu?
<Smurf> SUCK
*** tuthfairy has left channel #lesbian
==============================================================================
IBFT: No matter how hard you laugh with or at it, you'll NEVER get it.
http://www.amherst.edu/~mcspinks/ibft/ibfthome.html
email: mcspinks@unix.amherst.edu
ftp://ftp.etext.org/pub/Zines/IBFT The Eleventh Hour (617)696-3146
==============================================================================
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