98 lines
3.9 KiB
Plaintext
98 lines
3.9 KiB
Plaintext
s$
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$$ .d""b. .d""b. HOE E'ZINE #1103
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[-- $$""b. $$ $$ $$ $$ -- ------------------------------------------- --]
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$$ $$ $$ $$ $$ss$$ "What Kids Do"
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$$ $$ $$ $$ $$ by pl0nk
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$$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ 06/28/00
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[-- $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ -- ------------------------------------------- --]
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$$ $$ "TssT" "TssT"
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*STOMP* *STOMP* *STOMP* *YELLING*
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We know you guys are down there!
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Come out and play with us!
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*ECHOING*
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Where are these so called Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?
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Why do they never answer us?
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We're the product of the mislead 60-70's generation.
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Dear Miss Mary Poppins,
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I feel nothing but hate for you and your movie. Not only has
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my child drugged himself on cough syrup, he has also taken my
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umbrella, and he has jumped off of our roof and broken his neck. I hope
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you are happy. You've manipulated my son into thinking he can fly.
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I hope you die on your own cough medicine and when you're flying on your
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umbrella a gust of Dorothy's tornado comes and blows you to wonderland.
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Yours Truly,
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Mrs. Mackenzie
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Those shrooms, ohh, those small little bite sized shrooms, Alice took
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them and where did she end up? A closet freak for the rest of her days,
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time taken out of her life to look in the mirror.
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What are you looking at? Are you talking to me?
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Of course not, because all I see is myself.
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My eyes diluted and views distorted.
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What's todays special?
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Today we have an assortment of fine foods, I'll start by reading you
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the specials and we'll see where we get from there.
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Would you be interested in:
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A mouse named muffy, or perhaps a security guard named Sam.
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EAT THE HAT, kill the dummy. no more dancing and no more singing!
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Sorry, pardon me, I happen to have torretts syndrome.
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Polka dot door and that big stupid pokearu guy. DIE DIE DIE
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Those are the main dishes. Perhaps I could interest you in some
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appetizers before you decide on the main corse. We have these amazing
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Killer Tomatoes, not to be confused with the movie. They've been around
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for a couple seasons, but is slowly disappearing because of James Bond Jr.
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Maybe you'd like some Spidermen? Or how about the Thunder Cats...
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if Asians can eat cat, why can't we?
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Ohhh, you think you will be eating somewhere else? Here, let me see you
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to the exit. The clock says its time to close now, I guess I better
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close now.
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I dare you to climb that cause I bet any money you can't climb that...
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How much you wanna bet?
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A million dollars I swear I have it
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ok........ I'm at the top now, where's my money?
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what money?
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your not going to pay me!!! fuck you!! how am i supposed to get down?
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it's a willow tree, use the vines to swing down like tarzan
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ohhh ok .... thump..... owwww cry cry cry wine wine wine my back is broken
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no its not, your fine
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i can't breath, im dieing, my backs broken
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get up your fine, you only fell about 10 feet...
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if your wondering, all these stories are true.
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dood, ever wonder why they call it seven eleven?
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no, man.
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ya, me neither.
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grandfather why don't you smoke regular cigarettes instead of those
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non-filtered kind? because its like sucking a tit through a sweater son. ohh
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ok thanks grandpa. dad why do you suck tits through sweaters?
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*ring**ring* picking up * hello you've reached the answering machine of
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the Dicinhers please leave a message at the beep... *BEEP*
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hello my children-ah, its revern Cole speaking-ah, i have noticed that in
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row five-ah, your pueith-ah has been empty for quiet some time-ah.
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why would you deny the lord your faith-ah, PICK UP THE FUCKING PHONE
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YOU FUCKING JEWS-ah before I come down there and throw the mighty book
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of god upon you!.......... long pause............
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[-------------------------------------------------------------------------]
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[ (c) HOE E'ZINE -- http://www.hoe.nu HOE #1103, BY PL0NK - 6/28/00 ]
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