109 lines
5.6 KiB
Plaintext
109 lines
5.6 KiB
Plaintext
POUPEY PRODUCTIONS
|
|
- a n d -
|
|
HOE REVOLUTION text files
|
|
in conjunction with
|
|
the estate of the president presses
|
|
and the illegal brotherhood
|
|
P R E S E N T
|
|
_____________________________________________________________
|
|
//~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~\\
|
|
|| PURE ANARCHY!!!!!! /| SATAN |\ BOMBZ HARDCORE!! ||
|
|
|| ___ ___ | | IS LORD | | _______________ ||
|
|
|| |$$$| HOE 1016 |$$$| \`\ !!!!! /'/' |$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$| ||
|
|
|| |$$$| 01/30/00 |$$$| \ `---------' / |$$$|~~~~~~~~~~~ ||
|
|
|| |$$$|__________|$$$| / /\ /\ \ |$$$| LOTSA BOOM ||
|
|
|| |$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$| | '' `` | |$$$|___ 2 FUCK ||
|
|
|| |$$$$/~~~~~~~~\$$$$| \ ` ' / |$$$$$$$| YA SHT ||
|
|
|| |$$$| TRUE |$$$| `\ <o> /' |$$$|~~~ UP!!!! ||
|
|
|| |$$$| TERORISM |$$$| 666 `\ /' 666 |$$$|___________ ||
|
|
|| |$$$| INSIDE!! |$$$| ___/'`---'`\___ |$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$| ||
|
|
\\ ~~~ ~~~ HOGZA DA ENTROPY! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ //
|
|
\\ YEAH BOYEE@#! H/P/A/V/C IN DA MOTHAFUCKIN HAUSZ#@!@$ //
|
|
\\--------------------------------------------------//
|
|
\\ "How To Get Back At Your Rivals" //
|
|
\\ by Nybarius, Lethal Ninja //
|
|
\\______________________________________//
|
|
|
|
okay okay listen to this. as all of you know, there are a lot of
|
|
pretentious assholes inhabiting #ezines. as a matter of fact, only three
|
|
of us aren't. and, the dickens of it is, -we- are perceived as the
|
|
pretentious assholes from those on the outside. so, we must strike back.
|
|
how do we do this? firstly, we must make sure to never yield any ground
|
|
to the enemy. if they are encamped in our ditch, we ignore them! here is
|
|
how i put it, recently...
|
|
|
|
<nybar> so, i'm not talking to any of you.
|
|
<nybar> except those that have PhDs in the humanities
|
|
<nybar> these people include (but are not limited to): basehead,
|
|
soybean jamesy, tasha, caitlin, seaya, murmur, notgreg,
|
|
swisspope, rottenZ, phairgirl, art, miasma, et al.
|
|
<nybar> thank you for your time.
|
|
<tasha> i ate thai food yesterday
|
|
|
|
you would be surprised at how incredibly effective this technique
|
|
is! rather than having to sit through a boring lecture on the virtues of
|
|
midget skin-popping from an AIDS (that's right, it's __AN__ AIDS--don't
|
|
let acronyms simplify your syntax, people! but that's for another issue),
|
|
we have elucidating and frank discussions with basehead about how he's a
|
|
dorky white guy, but he's really an old motown blues guy under his
|
|
fragile shell.
|
|
|
|
oh, how fragile the shell is.
|
|
|
|
besides this, however, there are many ways to get under the skin
|
|
of our rivals...and not just skin popping! admittedly, we at POUPEY
|
|
PRODUCTIONS are rebel headbangers. yes, it's true. we take no prisoners.
|
|
so, when we really want to cause some fucking trouble...
|
|
|
|
WE BEAT OUR ENEMIES UPON THE HEAD AND NECK AREA UNTIL THEY DIE!
|
|
WITH A FUCKING LEAD PIPE!!! (right, justin??) HERE IS THAT ENACTED:
|
|
|
|
<nybar's real life simulacrum/avatar:> HEY, FUCK YOU ALTROCKS. I
|
|
NEVER LIKED YOU, FUCKER. PREPARE FOR THE PIE-EATING CONTEST IN HADES.
|
|
|
|
<altrocks' simulacrum> ouch! why are you hitting me with that lead
|
|
pipe, asshole? I feel like I am dying! ooooh!
|
|
|
|
*** altrocks graps his heart, swoons and dies
|
|
|
|
--There are existent, of course, more subtle, less direct methods
|
|
than the ol' trusty and effective "bludgeon em until they die." Yes
|
|
indeed. believe it or not, one of these involves poisoning old ladies on
|
|
the subway. First off, you buy some arsenic or, better yet, cyanide.
|
|
Then, on the streets of New York City (NEW YORK FOR LIFE. DON'T BE A
|
|
SQUARE IN DELAWARE OR BE A FISH AGAIN IN MICHIGAN!!!), buy some peanuts
|
|
for just one dollar. That's right, exactly $1.00--no fucking with change!
|
|
It's the express lane as you are marching to DEATH'S DRUMMER (who is,
|
|
perhaps, one of those nice Kiss guys who sponsors anti-drug ads.)
|
|
|
|
Now, here comes the complex, "King Graham has mastered the
|
|
inventory" part of the plan. Mix the poison and the nuts! Here is an
|
|
ascii diagram to help those slow of comprehension out!
|
|
|
|
STEP ONE--NUTS::: _________________
|
|
| ethiopian |
|
|
| pee-nutz! |
|
|
| [TM] |
|
|
`-----------------'
|
|
|
|
STEP TWO--POISON::: .----.
|
|
| |
|
|
| |
|
|
( XXX )
|
|
( )
|
|
/ \
|
|
`--------'
|
|
|
|
STEP THREE--(ALL OF THE ABOVE!!!)
|
|
|
|
haha, once you have your deadly concoction ready, simply hand some
|
|
to a friendly old black
|
|
HAHA! ONCE you have your deadly concoction ready, feed them to a
|
|
friendly old black lady. eat some out of your pockets to reassure her
|
|
that you're not up to any funny business. [NOTE: EATING DEADLY NUTS NOT
|
|
RECOMMENDED. THIS MEANS YOU, COSBY.] once you feed them to her, she will
|
|
die. and viola! all your problems are solved! thanks!
|
|
|
|
[--------------------------------------------------------------------------]
|
|
[ (c) HOE EZINE! WWW.HOE.NU! A-BEWM-BEWM! #1016 -> BY NYBARIUS - 1/30/00 ]
|