128 lines
6.1 KiB
Plaintext
128 lines
6.1 KiB
Plaintext
[--------------------------------------------------------------------------]
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ooooo ooooo .oooooo. oooooooooooo HOE E'ZINE RELEASE #632
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`888' `888' d8P' `Y8b `888' `8
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888 888 888 888 888 "Just a Prediction.."
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888ooooo888 888 888 888oooo8
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888 888 888 888 888 " by Anjee
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888 888 `88b d88' 888 o 5/11/99
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o888o o888o `Y8bood8P' o888ooooood8
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[--------------------------------------------------------------------------]
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-=[ The Scene: Mogel and Styx are standing in the hotel lobby
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patiently awaiting the arrival of their fellow HOE members. Mogel is
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holding up a sign on which "ALL HOES HERE!" is written in big black
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letters, while Styx is dressed in a sexy red velvet dress and playing his
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guitar. A small group of lazer-tag fanatics are hanging not too far
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away. ]=-
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Styx: Oh no, lazer-tag bitches. LAZER TAG SUCKS!! THEY MUST BE DESTROYED
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BEFORE THEY BREED.
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Mogel: You should ask them to write for HOE.
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-=[ Within an hour, all HOEs have arrived and begin heading to
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their respective rooms. Elevator doors open to seaya just standing there
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and smiling. ]=-
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Seaya: To exit the elevator, you must say the secret password!
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TanAdept: luv luv luv, luv luv.
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<Leah moves and lets g0ff (and Anna) out. The others close the
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elevator doors and get off on the next floor, taking the stairs back down
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a level.>
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Tasha: <running around the hall singing>. WAITING FOR THE CHILDREN OF THE
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COLD WAR TO DIIIEEEE
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-=[ Everybody is separated in two different rooms. Smoking and non-
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-smoking. Darwin is alone in the non smoking room writing a text on hotel
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stationary entitled "100 reasons why Anjee sucks". In the other room,
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Meenk is laying on the bed showing Caitlin her various piercings and
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subtlely seducing her, meanwhile all the others sit on the floor and
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talk. ]=-
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Neko: I read this really boring page on the internet before I left, I
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will now completely recite it for all of you.
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TanAdept: 251!
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seaya: 5049! hehehe, luv!!@#!
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-=[ TanAdept and Seaya move to the other side of the room and begin
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playing "Guess what number I am thinking of, luv" for a few hours, TanAdept
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guesses 251 and 5049. As for Seaya, she guesses "1 l1k3 g1rl5!@#!"
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AnonGirl starts convulsing due to this unknown and disliked feeling of
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sobriety that has come upon her. SwissPope is sitting behind her, mumbling
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about the Czech Republic. ]=-
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SwissPope: ....the Czech Republic has always .. <words soon fade into slow
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blah blah, anyone listening is hypnotized.>
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AnonGirl: <stares blankly at Swisspope> Hey kreid, let's go drink some
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vodka and smoke weed all night, I haven't smoked in 14 hours!
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Kreid: OKAY, LETS GO! I LOVE DRUGS
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Mogel: Get the drugs to write for hoe! And while you do that, I will try
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to convince a hot chick to give me a blowjob.
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-=[ AnonGirl and Kreid gather their drugs and booze, heading over to
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Darwin's room. ]=-
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Tasha: As the young one's begin their wandering through crack houses,
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leverage buyouts, tv news, legal claims and taxes la la la
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Styx: Dan Bern rules, tasha!!!
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Caitlin: <screaming from the other room> Yeah! What he said!
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Anjee: <giggles and flips her hair>
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isaac: Tashaaaaaa... oh Taaaaaaaaaaaaaasssshhhhhhaaaaaaaaaa.. tasha!
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hi! hello tasha! tasha! hi!)#&$(%
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AltRocks: Shut up Isaac. You're making my life worse than it already is.
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Because of you I may end up getting a 4th psychiatrist and be
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put on much more pills. Then I'll have to write a HOE file
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about my terrible, shitty, pathetic life and dedicate it to you!
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<Altrocks hides in the bathtub and cries.>
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AIDS: That would be a terrible, shitty, pathetic thing to do,
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AltRocks! Resist the temptation and spare us the agony. And
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you, Isaac, don't provoke him.
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Jamesy: Shut up, AIDS!
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AIDS: HAHAHA!
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Jamesy: Just shut up, AIDS!
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phairgirl: I'm so glad I don't have to work at Wendy's for a few days!
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And it brings me great joy to know I am out of Dubuque.
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PezMonkey: At least you aren't stuck with an extremely annoying roomate
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like the one I have right now.
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Hardkore: Do you think she would sleep with me? <draws a squiggly winking
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smiley face -> ;} on a piece of paper and holds it up for all
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to see.>
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Mogel: Back off, man, I want to get laid first. I'm cute and I'm
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silly, that is what girls go for! OH! And I also happen to
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have an ENORMOUS COCK!
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Anilos: That behavior annoys me, Mogel. I think I will add that to
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"Things That Annoy Me, Episode 3".txt when I get back home!
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Daisy: You're in the middle of writing a t-file too, Anilos? I'm
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writing about how no one cares about me except my boyfriend--
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because he's the greatest boy in the universe that is!
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RottenZ: I'm writing "My ninth HOE file by RottenZ".
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Mogel: You all are the best for writing for hoe. Get your friends to
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write for HOE!
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Gweeds: I wrote down a whole bunch of URLs on a piece of paper and
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XeroXed it for each and every one of you!
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TanAdept: How many are there? 251???
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-=[ Caitlin and Meenk exit the room, both with satisfied looks on
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their faces. ]=-
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Gweeds: hmm..
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Soybean: HELLO. I AM HERE. ACKNOWLEDGE ME.
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Styx: You just sounded like some chick from some horrible movie I saw
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a while back, Soybean. I hate movies.
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Caitlin: So do I.
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Styx: I _love_ Dan Bern, though!
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Caitlin: So do I.
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tasha: <breaks out in a Dan Bern song>
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isaac: OH TASHA!! You're there!! hi tasha!@)$*!
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Reflecks: doo wah ditty poo poo yum. woodah nee oh ray ray!
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Anjee: You are awesome, reflecks! Have you heard the story about when I
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poo'd a smartie? <giggles and flips hair>
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I refuse to continue this.
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[--------------------------------------------------------------------------]
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[ (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! HOE #632 - WRITTEN BY: ANJEE - 5/11/99 ]
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