115 lines
5.1 KiB
Plaintext
115 lines
5.1 KiB
Plaintext
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ooooo ooooo .oooooo. oooooooooooo HOE E'ZINE RELEASE #616
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`888' `888' d8P' `Y8b `888' `8
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888 888 888 888 888 "The Picnic Channel"
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888ooooo888 888 888 888oooo8
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888 888 888 888 888 " by Oregano
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888 888 `88b d88' 888 o 5/9/99
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o888o o888o `Y8bood8P' o888ooooood8
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Late at night, when light from the sun is blocked by the giant known
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as Earth, there blows the solar wind. The atmosphere becomes ionized and
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the satellites circling the dark side of the world become erratic. At such
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times strange channels flicker in and out of the normal cable choices.
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Up at 4 a.m. to take anti-biotics, fighting off strep, I sit in
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front of the TV to make myself drowsy enough to fall back asleep. As my
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eyelids flutter open, flutter closed, the Picnic Channel appears before me.
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Here is what I see.
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Children's Picnic.
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A morning show with furry muppet-like characters on a perpetual
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picnic who get into all sorts of adventures. One show they might climb a
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tree, another find a cave. They sing a lot of songs and play games and
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learn to play fair. Learning the alphabet and counting are important to
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the morning picnicers
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Sunrise Picnic.
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A show which encourages picnics in the early morning, especially
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those early enough to watch the sun glide above the horizon. Watching the
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sun rise gets the day off right, you see the day born, the way God meant it
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to be; you'd not sleep through the first 3 years of your child's life, so
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why would you sleep through the first 3 hours of the newborn day?
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The Fancy Pattern
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A show about picnic blankets and other important picnic cloths.
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Morning Picnic
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This is like a Regis and Kathy Lee show but set out in a lovely,
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green picnic land. Each morning celebrity guests join Mike and Johana at
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the picnic, (though admittedly rather minor celebrities). Plus lots of
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chefs and outdoor specialists and craft experts. Time management gurus
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show ways to add picnicing hours to even the busiest life.
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Every Friday the Gadget Guy shows up with new tools and gadgets to
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make your picnicing simpler and more enjoyable.
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Relax! Life's a picnic!
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Basket of Bounty.
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A cooking show tailored to the needs of the picnicer. How to keep
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food fresh, plus new food ideas, and other exciting looks at picnic fare.
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Season of Love.
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A show somewhat remniscent of the Love Boat. A crew of professional
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picnicers welcome each week a new love stuck couple and through the magic
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of picnics bring the two hearts together.
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This week's show:
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They were a couple in college who separated after graduation and
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made divergent lives for themselves. He is a rising young exec in a
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securities firm who has never taken more than 20 minutes for lunch on his
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long climb up the corporate world. She is a dog trainer who is in complete
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touch with herself.
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One magic day they run into each other by accident when he is
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assigned to take to the shelter a stray dog that got loose in his corporate
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headquarters and she is in the same shelter to pick up a dog of hers that
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ran away. There is a magic between them after all the time elapsed and they
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agree to get together for lunch. She says that it is important that they
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have a special picnic lunch with so many years to catch up on. He balks,
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but a few days later after thinking it over he agrees to the picnic.
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Our regular cast comes to the picture and sets up a picnic so
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romantic and zany that it can never be forgotten.
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The picnic changes the man's life and he quits his job the next day
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and opens up his own bait shop. The couple lives happily ever after.
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Movie of the Week.
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"The Perfect Picnic"
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A mother and daughter plan on having the perfect picnic but the
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mother dies of horrible cancer before they can make their plans come alive.
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The daughter weeps for a half hour of TV time and finally decides that she
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has to go on the picnic by herself to honor her mother and complete her
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grief.
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The perfect picnic involves a trip to Yellowston National Park in
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the heart of spring and a picnic in the famous daffodil fields. This movie
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features some of the most stunning aerial picnic sweeps yet captured for a
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TV audience.
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PicnicCenter
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An end of the day look at picnic news which wraps up any picnic
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stories that viewers have followed all day.
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The ions lose their energy and the erratic satellites come under the
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full glare of a new day's sun and resume their transmissions of the Golf
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Channel and Emeril Live. I wake up to light slicing through my venetian
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blinds. I get up and go to my dark bedroom to finish a last few hours of
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sleep before the alarm blares.
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[--------------------------------------------------------------------------]
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[ (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! HOE #616 - WRITTEN BY: OREGANO - 5/9/99 ]
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