135 lines
7.5 KiB
Plaintext
135 lines
7.5 KiB
Plaintext
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ooooo ooooo .oooooo. oooooooooooo HOE E'ZINE RELEASE #537
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`888' `888' d8P' `Y8b `888' `8
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888 888 888 888 888 "Things That Annoy Me"
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888ooooo888 888 888 888oooo8
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888 888 888 888 888 " by Anilos
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888 888 `88b d88' 888 o 3/27/99
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o888o o888o `Y8bood8P' o888ooooood8
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1.) Teenage Law Professors who say they're going to sue me.
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It's time for a bitch fest, here are some things that really
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irritate me. Let's start off with the most boring (to most) topic.
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People who claim they'll sue over the most mundane things. (i.e. you say
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something in school and some idiotic person claims that's sexual
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harassment and can take you to court.)
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Here's the two type of people who usually say such things.
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Future Lawyer #1: The people who say it, but in a joking manner and
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really have no intention of following through.
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These people rarely say such a comment but when they
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do it is appropriate and maybe even funny somtimes.
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Future Lawyer #2: The people who say it, mean it, and have no fucking
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idea what they are getting themselves into. They
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may not necessarily follow through with the threat
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but they always talk about how they're going to take
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someone to court on a common basis. This may vary
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with how annoyingly moronic the person is.
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Why is it so stupid to claim your going to sue someone over
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something? There are a number of reasons, it can take months up to years
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to just have a pre-trial hearing. The court systems are so backed up with
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people who may get ahead of you because their crimes are more serious (and
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due process says you are entitled to a fair and speedy trial). Now, truly,
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is it really worth the long wait and legal fees to really litigate someone
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over an otherwise innane comment or action? Allow me to answer for you,
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No, it isn't. If you still want to follow through and try to take someone
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to court my advice is this: bring in an arbitrator, settle out of court,
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or you can always do what I tell people who want to follow through on this
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"Go to the nearest 10+ story building and fling yourself out of window,
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because you are a goddamn idiot."
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That reminds me of something funny. Ever hear of the "Darwin
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Awards"? It's an award given to people who have killed themselves/been
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killed in the stupidest ways that it's a blessing they were removed from
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the gene pool. One of the winners was a lawyer who was demonstrating the
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durability of the building he worked in by leaning against a window. The
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window cracked, broke, and he plummeted to his death (some 20 stories I
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believe. Can't remember off the top of my head.) Isn't that funny? No?
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Well I thought so, go to hell.
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2.) My absent minded demeanor.
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Hopefully some of you noticed that the point above really had no
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closure to it. If you caught it, congratulations, this brings up another
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agitating aspect of everyday life. I have a very absent mind, I'll talk
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about something then begin talking about a different topic entirely without
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ever finish talking about the previous topic. This, however I usually
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catch and remedy. But there's just this one process that keeps repeating
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itself day after damn day. I go to the DECA snack shack (at my high
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school.) and I usually buy the same thing (yes, it's really sad I have a
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routine for eating food.) that being, Cookies, donuts, a soda and skittles.
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(All essential in a well-balanced, nutritious lunch.) Now, I never start
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with the skittles and maybe that's why this happens.. I ALWAYS forget about
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the damn skittles. I put them in my backpack and forget about them
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totally, only to find them a few days later, after which I proceed to eat
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them. One time it got so bad that I essentially had 3 full bags of
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skittles scattered all over my house. And it's only with this candy, what
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the hell is with that?!
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3.) Loud, obnoxious twits.
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I'm a quiet person, I enjoy a quiet environment. Unfortunately when
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I'm at school, my hopes for a quiet environment are more often than not,
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shattered, by these loud assholes who scream to each other on the other
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side of the building. But that's not all, It's not constructive
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conversation, oh no, can't have that in a high school setting apparently,
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they have to yell the most retarded remarks. Comments on how they go so
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drunk that weekend or how fucked up they got on drugs, Now, this brings up
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my opinion on drugs and alcohol. Alcohol I like, Drugs, I don't like or
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do but that does not mean I'm entirely against them. Do what you want,
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it's your body, not mine. The funniest aspect of my opinion on drugs and
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alcohol is when people start throwing statistics my way explaining how
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alcohol is worse than drugs. Let me just spell it out nice and simple here
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for those who were about to do that: I DO NOT FUCKING CARE ABOUT YOUR
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LAMEASS STATISTICS AND OFF BASE OPINIONS. It seems my absent mind has
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kicked in again, let me proceed back to the original point of this whole
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bitch session. Here's a example I Just cooked up that I base on a lot of
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the things I hear in the hallway everyday.
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Person #1 <Screaming to person #2 who is 20 feet away>: Ya I got so
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fucking drunk last night and I had sex with about a dozen guys, it was
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fucking rad, fuck this fuck that, bla bl bla.
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Person #2 <Screams back, apparently is too lazy to walk that far>:
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Really? That's real cool, I got fucked up on acid last night and
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participated in a wild orgy. I hate being on the pill, it makes me sick.
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So forth and so on.
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4.) Cover bands that aren't cover bands.
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Now, maybe your asking "What the hell are you talking about?" Well
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allow me to use my prime example... the band, Godsmack. I'm very sorry to
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all of their fans but NEVER in my life have I seen a band so blatantly rip
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off a band that was around/still is around. Godsmack is a mock ripoff of
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Alice In Chains. Let's look at some little "coincidental" facts:
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- Godsmack, the name itself is an alice in chains song on the cd
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"Dirt".
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- The singer sounds so much like Layne Staley I actually thought it
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was a new Alice in chains song when I heard it. Everyone in the
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car thought AIC had a new song out.
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- The guitars sound like pre "Tripod" with the exclusion of the way
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AIC used acoustics in "Sap" and "Jar Of Flies".
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- Ironically they show up after Alice in Chains had been on hiatus,
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it's my prediction that if AIC ever comes out with a new cd,
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they'll disappear into obscurity.
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I'm sure I can point out more discrepancies, but I don't really want
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to try right now. I realize that a lot of bands out there cannot
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necessarily create their own unique sound without being labeled as a
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copycat of a band that was around previously, but when they sound THIS
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alike it's just far too obvious. I know I was going to write something
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else, but I forgot, so I'll quit while I'm still ahead.
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[ (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! HOE #537 - WRITTEN BY: ANILOS - 3/27/99 ]
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