53 lines
3.0 KiB
Plaintext
53 lines
3.0 KiB
Plaintext
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'##::::'##:::'#####:::'########: VIVA LA REVOLUCION! CERDO DEL CAPITALISTA!!
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##:::: ##::'##.. ##:: ##.....:: ===========================================
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##:::: ##:'##:::: ##: ##::::::: THE HELOTS OF ECSTASY PRESS RELEASE #481 !!
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#########: ##:::: ##: ######::: ZIEGO VUANTAR SHALL BE MUCH VICTORIOUS! !!
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##.... ##: ##:::: ##: ##...:::: ===========================================
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##:::: ##:. ##:: ##:: ##::::::: "The Girl Who Never Cried Wolf" !!
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##:::: ##::. #####::: ########: by -> Girl From Mars !!
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..:::::..::::.....::::........:: 2/10/99 !!
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!!========================================================================!!
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I don't lie unless it's completely necessary. Most of the time,
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lying is unnecessary. Being a shrewd, efficient person, I do not allow
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myself the time to waste on lying. Why is it then, may I ask you, that
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people just do not take me seriously? Why is it that whenever I have a
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problem that could be pressing in nature, do people shrug their shoulders
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at me and mumble some unintelligible nicety and back slowly away? This
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has recently come to my attention, as I have done something seemingly
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dreadful to my ankle, and the health-clinic doctor brushed me off upon
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my inquiring as to what was wrong. Boy, did that make me mad! I had to
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spend the whole weekend on my arse, because walking was too painful! I
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made a vow this weekend, between episodes of AbFab, (there was a whole
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marathon!) that I would show them a thing or two.
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My plan was a cunning one. I called up the clinic early in the
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morning and scheduled an appointment. At the agreed time, I showed up
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at the clinic and met with the doctor. The conversation went a little
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like this:
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Doctor: What seems to be the trouble?
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Me: Why, nothing, nothing at all. I am a picture of health. I feel
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so good today, you would be amazed."
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Doctor: Um, alright, then what are you doing at the clinic today?
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Me: Well, I just wanted to let you know how well I'm feeling today.
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Doctor: Are you SURE there's nothing wrong?
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Me: Of course I'm sure... wait, is this the health clinic?
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Doctor: Yes...
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Me: I thought so... well, I came here with some health for you, and
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you're trying to egg me on to admit that I'm not in good health!
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If I wanted to tell someone I was sick, I'd go to the hospital!
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Jeez!
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Doctor: You seem a bit confused as to the purpose of the health clinic.
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Let me give you a quick checkup just to make sure you're alright.
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Well, the doctor found my ankle problem, gave me some painkillers
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and some crutches and I was on my way. I sure learned my lesson, too.
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The only way to get where I want to go in life is to lie. Remember that,
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kids, and if anyone asks, tell them that the Girl From Mars told you so.
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Thus is the story of my life.
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!!========================================================================!!
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!! (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! #481, WRITTEN BY GIRL FROM MARS, 2/10/99 !!
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