207 lines
11 KiB
Plaintext
207 lines
11 KiB
Plaintext
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'##::::'##:::'#####:::'########: VIVA LA REVOLUCION! CERDO DEL CAPITALISTA!!
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##:::: ##::'##.. ##:: ##.....:: ===========================================
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##:::: ##:'##:::: ##: ##::::::: THE HELOTS OF ECSTASY PRESS RELEASE #459 !!
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#########: ##:::: ##: ######::: ZIEGO VUANTAR SHALL BE MUCH VICTORIOUS! !!
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##.... ##: ##:::: ##: ##...:::: ===========================================
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##:::: ##:. ##:: ##:: ##::::::: "Why Do I Date Closed-minded Pricks?" !!
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##:::: ##::. #####::: ########: by -> Caitlin !!
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..:::::..::::.....::::........:: 1/21/99 !!
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!!========================================================================!!
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Okay... and intro... la la la... this was a convo I had with an
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asshole on AOL. An asshole I stumbled apon once apon a time. It's
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pretty stupid, or at least he is. I can be so pathetic, jeez...
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assholes stick to me like a load in the eyeball.
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!!========================================================================!!
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AddictZero: Hello
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Synikalle: hi hi
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AddictZero: Question:
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Synikalle: yeeees?
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AddictZero: Why would anyone have to contemplate them being real? I
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believe that that would make someone disillusioned and just
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fucking crazy.
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Synikalle: I don't think people do contemplate it
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Synikalle: i just think that it's a subconcious thing that's there.
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There's no reason to say we're not real, so..
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AddictZero: then why would anyone need something to realize that they
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are real when they know that already. No one is fake in the
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sense that they dont exist in reality
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Synikalle: what is real anyway. Yanno.. just a stupid fucking
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definition created by someone else.
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Synikalle: what is reality though
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Synikalle: everyone has a different reality
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AddictZero: Everyone is in agreement that everything around them (for
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the most part) exists in some reality, whether its mine or
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Mr. Smiths, it is still thre. That is one of the stupidest
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things I have ever heard anyone say.
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Synikalle: then why do you still talk to me.
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AddictZero: because I dont not like you. I just thought that that whole
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"clinging to something to assure that hey are real" thing is
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riduculous
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AddictZero: they rather
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Synikalle: Well, that's how alot of people are. Christians find comfort
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in Christianity and knowing that there is a heaven, and
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salvation... et cetera
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Synikalle: Lesbians find comfort in their secure sexuality
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Synikalle: as do Heterosexuals
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Synikalle: I'm different in that aspect. I don't find comfort in
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anything.
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AddictZero: but that doesnt ever make them think that they are fake, or
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even "not-real" whatever. Its a comfort device, but never a
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realization of being real because everyone knows that they
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are real
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Synikalle: when I was a few years younger, relationships were the only
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secure thing for me. but... now.. I like falling. Not having
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anything except blank sheets ahead of me is normal and
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intriguing and ..
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Synikalle: I'm using myself as an example. I have no faith except
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what's there in my subconcious. No words to describe it, no
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god, no thought. Pure Love. I have nothing to hide behind,
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nothing to believe in, nothing to argue over, because there
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is nothing there.
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Synikalle: I accept what I am given at each second of each day. I don't
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question what is there.. because there is nothing to question
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Synikalle: most people can't deal with that.
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Synikalle: in fact, almost everyone.
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Synikalle: including you, obviously.
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AddictZero: But why would anything make you real when you already are
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real? I question everything to further myself. everything
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is a learning process.
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Synikalle: nothing makes you real. It's the idea of security. if
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there's nothing to cling to, you float off into the abyss.
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AddictZero: no you dont. I cling to nothing and I am stronger because
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of it.
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Synikalle: actually, you're a philosopher, you cling to simple
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definitions of life...
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Synikalle: definitions = meanings.
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Synikalle: like your whole quest for picking apart everything
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AddictZero: no, becase I dont care what life means because I already
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know. So there is no clinging
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Synikalle: then why were you so upset for the past week or whatever,
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why did you have to decipher every little thing that life
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has been shown as
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AddictZero: I didnt. I didnt decifer anything. I had to decide some
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personal things. See...I told you that you'd see and by
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showing you I find that you dont get me one bit. You dont
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know me
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Synikalle: See, the thing is Jaime..
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Synikalle: I'm not saying you're completely wrong...
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Synikalle: what i'm trying to point out is your concrete beliefs
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AddictZero: I'm not wrong at all.
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Synikalle: everything that you know is how everything is definately.
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everyone else is wrong.
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Synikalle: I don't know if what i feel is right, but i don't know if
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it's wrong
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AddictZero: And I have no concrete beliefs because I decide what I
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believe when it is shown to me. Then I can discount that
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also. I dontbelieve in anything for clingingness or
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security.
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Synikalle: well, how i feel, doesn't discount anyone. anybodys beliefs
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could be right, or wrong
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Synikalle: because nobody knows for sure
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Synikalle: and you're right, I don't know you at all. You keep yourself
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well hidden, and don't give other people a chance to see
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inside.
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AddictZero: Thats beacause I dont have to show anyone who I am and
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rarely I do. Theres things that no one needs to know and
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things that arent known to anyone because it would make them
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realize many things about themselves and destruct certain
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thoughts that they had. i save them from that
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AddictZero: I'm not into discosure. I gain trust in other ways
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Synikalle: you're pretty confident in that. but not everyone is weak
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like you think.
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Synikalle: there is.. getting to know people.. i'm not saying just be
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an open person..
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AddictZero: Yes they are. Mostly everyone is weak and feeble minded
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and cant take certain things. I can tell this of people
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Synikalle: I'm saying, not everybody is. I already pointed out the fact
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that most people are insecure, but what I am saying... not
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everybody is.
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AddictZero: 99.9% are. You are. I was. dont say your not, because
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there is much evidence to support this
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Synikalle: no need to get arrogant.
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Synikalle: "you don't have to like me for who i am.. but we'll see what
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you're made of by what you make of me."
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AddictZero: I'm not being arrogant. I am a bringer of truth. I can
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tell who someone is the second they open thier mouths. And
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I am made of what people made me. "You aren't who you think
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you are, you're what everyone else thinks you are" -Fishism
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Synikalle: that's stupid
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Synikalle: no offense
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Synikalle: :)
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AddictZero: Don't take all of this as a "I hate you" thing, or any other
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negetive way. And thats not stupid. It's the fucking truth.
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What is truth you may ask...Well, we all know what truth is
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Synikalle: classic western thinking.
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Synikalle: as for the last quote, that might be the motto of marketing
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employes, but if you're seriously using that quote, that's
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what we in the biz call "superifcial as hell"
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AddictZero: What isn't true about that? You can think you are
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something, but ultimatly for what? To project that upon
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someone else. If someone thinks I am an asshole then thats
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what I am. I can think whatever I want but it's all up to
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everyone else. Like you...You think the world of yourself
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although someone may think that you are a bitch and any other
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negetive thing. They dont see you as being gorgeous and
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whatever...they see you as a bitch. That makes you a bitch
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then. And its not superficial. Its true...
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AddictZero: you just want to be above it. No one is
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Synikalle: yeah, so what if you leave a little piece of yourself with
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everyone else, that doesn't make you what everyone else
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thinks you are. everyone gets different impressions of
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people, even when they get to know them.
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Synikalle: they're two different extremes
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Synikalle: one can not rely only on what they think of themselves,
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NOR what others think of them--they must use both
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Synikalle: however, ultimately what you think of yourself will guide
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you farther in life
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Synikalle: for someone can be a truly wonderful person, yet still
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mocked and hurt. does that make them less valuable? of
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course not.
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AddictZero: Yes it does because thats what they are made into
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Synikalle: there are too many people in this world to worry about what
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each individuals percieves you as
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AddictZero: right. I am not saying you should wrry about it. But to you
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you are the best. To me I am the best. No who else
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believes that I or you is the best? No one. Its good to
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have esteem and not give a fuck what people say but still,
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we are what they say we are
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Synikalle: you cant be made into anything by what others think of
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you...its you who start anything and that spawns whatever
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thoughts others might have....its just different ways of
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perceiving the same thing, if you want to get philosophical
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Synikalle: you are not soley made who you are by what others think of
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you. there are several factors. you can choose to be
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affected or not be affected
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Synikalle: to say our entire identity is made by what others say about
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is is pretty silly, i think
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Synikalle: or just naive
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Synikalle: if a person is relatively weak...their identity can be
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changed by what others say....but only to a certain extent
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AddictZero: Check it...You just arent looking at this the right way.
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You are who you are to no one but yourself. Now, given you
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may come off as close as you can to what you think you are,
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someone still will take away from that by making an opinion
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on you making you someone else. still Caitlin, but Joe's
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Caitlin, not Caitlin's Caitlin
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Synikalle: so, what the hell is your point, anyways?
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AddictZero: I already established that
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AddictZero: I could sit here all day arguing my point versus yours and
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we will get nowhere. I am leaving now
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Synikalle: well
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AddictZero: well what?
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Synikalle: i still miss seeing you
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Synikalle: *giggle*
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AddictZero: We'll see about fixing that. With school and pre made plans
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for this weekend, it may be difficult. We'll do something
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soon though
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Synikalle: heh, neat.
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AddictZero: Now I leave you
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Synikalle: peace.
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!!========================================================================!!
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!! (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! HOE #459, LOGGED BY: CAITLIN - 1/21/99 !!
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