87 lines
4.7 KiB
Plaintext
87 lines
4.7 KiB
Plaintext
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'##::::'##:::'#####:::'########: VIVA LA REVOLUCION! CERDO DEL CAPITALISTA!!
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##:::: ##::'##.. ##:: ##.....:: ===========================================
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##:::: ##:'##:::: ##: ##::::::: THE HELOTS OF ECSTASY PRESS RELEASE #449 !!
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#########: ##:::: ##: ######::: ZIEGO VUANTAR SHALL BE MUCH VICTORIOUS! !!
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##.... ##: ##:::: ##: ##...:::: ===========================================
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##:::: ##:. ##:: ##:: ##::::::: "My Brother's Friends" !!
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##:::: ##::. #####::: ########: by -> AnonGirl !!
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..:::::..::::.....::::........:: 1/18/99 !!
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!!========================================================================!!
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Having a twin brother can sometimes mean sharing friends in the
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same age group. It's happened a lot in my case, which isn't so bad
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because they just see me as Audrey, and not as my brother's lame
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older/younger sister. However, in the past two years, my brother has
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brought home a very interesting array of people he calls his friends.
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I felt the need to write about them, so shut up and read.
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The names in this article have been changed to cover my ass.
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First, there's Martin. He started hanging around my house over
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two years now and has basically become another member of my family
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since he's here more than he is home. In fact, I think he lives here.
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He hasn't left my house in a good month or two, and was even here on
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Christmas. My mom and grandmother bought him gifts, and he got us some
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gifts. Although I don't know where he got the money considering he's
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been here, unemployed, this whole time. He's a pretty cool guy. He
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brought his computer here so now I have a kick-ass computer and a
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decent 15" monitor instead of my piece of shit 486/33. So he's a good
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guy. However, he's asked me out five times in the past two years and
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it's getting REALLY GOD DAMN ANNOYING. I really hope he doesn't read
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this.
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Then there's Shane. Shane is a good-looking mack-daddy who also
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started hanging with my bro two years ago. He has a girlfriend, but that
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doesn't stop him from messing around with other girls behind her back,
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including his friends' sisters. Hrm. He's a smooth-talkin',
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jive-walkin' mack-daddy. He smokes me for free something, so it's cool.
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Not that you can buy my love with drugs.
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Booze, maybe.
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Harry is the poor kid of the group. My mom takes sympathy on him
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and buys food that he likes. I think I'd be embarassed if someone's
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mother did that with me. I wouldn't want to be pointed out from my
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friends as the pity case who has a terrible life. I dunno, that's just
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me.
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Paul is stranger than the others. He's younger than everyone,
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doesn't go to school but manages to score weed by the pound. Whenever
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he's here and walking by me or something where I'm in the vicinity, he
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stares at me. I don't know why, and he doesn't stare for long. Little
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meaningful glances here and there. I don't know why he stares, maybe
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it's because he doesn't know me as well. Maybe he can hear me wonder
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about how he gets $9600 for pot and isn't even in school. He doesn't
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work, or deal anything, I know that much. I know it's none of my
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business, but if someone who is more of a bum than ME scores pounds of
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weed... I'd like to know the secret, too!
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Sam is the destined criminal of the group. Already being fined
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with grand theft auto, though dismissed, his fate definetely holds some
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jailtime for him. Sam once tried to prove his alcoholic testosterone to
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me by chugging a mickey of Jack Daniels, but it didn't work and he spat
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up all over my basement instead.
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I first met Keith in my driveway at 3am one Saturday night in
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the summer. I was stumbling out of a cab, drunk, and he was smoking a
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joint with my brother. He's got really nice hair and eyelashes (it
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really REALLY pisses me off when a guy has nice hair and/or eyelashes.
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Why the FUCK should they get that without styling it or V05ing it or
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wearing mascara?!) I've only met Keith twice, so I can't really say
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much about how he is just yet.
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Last but not least, there's Richard. Richard is the freak
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12-year-old mentality guy who gets kicks out of farting directly on
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someone's nose and jacking off at any given moment, in public or
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private. Luckily I've never been around for one of his episodes, I
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don't think I could deal with that. Fortunately my brother and his
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other friends think he's rather strange, so he's not around that much
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anymore.
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I don't know how some guys live with themselves.
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!!========================================================================!!
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!! (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! HOE #449, WRITTEN BY ANONGIRL - 1/18/99 !!
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