75 lines
3.9 KiB
Plaintext
75 lines
3.9 KiB
Plaintext
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'##::::'##:::'#####:::'########: VIVA LA REVOLUCION! CERDO DEL CAPITALISTA!!
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##:::: ##::'##.. ##:: ##.....:: ===========================================
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##:::: ##:'##:::: ##: ##::::::: THE HELOTS OF ECSTACY PRESS RELEASE #280 !!
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#########: ##:::: ##: ######::: ZIEGO VUANTAR SHALL BE MUCH VICTORIOUS! !!
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##.... ##: ##:::: ##: ##...:::: ===========================================
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##:::: ##:. ##:: ##:: ##::::::: "Should You Date The Devil?" !!
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##:::: ##::. #####::: ########: by -> Anjee !!
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..:::::..::::.....::::........:: 11/9/98 !!
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!!========================================================================!!
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since i have been fortunate (or unfortunate) enough to be able to
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date the devil himself [however, he prefers to be known as "satan in
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pants"], i thought i should inform all of you girls (or guys) the pro's
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and con's in engaging into a relationship with the devil, and also how
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you can detect them before getting into the whole mess.
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i will begin with the little tips and tricks on how to spot the
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devil or his accomplices before devoting a vast amount of your life to
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evil. first off, these devils-in-disguise normally sport a shaved head
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and wear sunglasses throughout the year (the reason they do this is
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because the sun and the reflection of its brightness on snow is hard on
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their eyes -- being used to dark places and fires). although, if you do
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choose to get to know this potential evil being, make sure you know
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their birthdate. if it's october 31st or december 25th -- because dec.
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25th people hog all the presents :/, beware. that and any 666 on that
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person's body are sure signs. don't let their "kindness" fool you, as
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they will quickly change into bomb-crazy maniacs.
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the pro's of dating the devil are slim, yet manage to lure
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innocent girls into such evil doings. one would surely be getting
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spoiled! of course getting spoiled is fun and makes you feel somewhat
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special, money and anything considered to be "materialistic" is the root
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of all evil (i sure repeat "evil" a lot, don't i? ah well). their kind
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and sensitive acts are just what i said: acts. i should also note
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having an irc/irl relationship with satan has its good sides. such as
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being able to get anyone's connection dropped and modem burnt (seeing
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that evil on-line dudes are normally leet).
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but as we all know, there's a negative side to everything. if
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you were stupid enough to fall into this person's trap and later realize
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that your better-half (not litterally) is in fact the devil, you get to
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be subject of rumours weeks after you break up in a huff. in addition,
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for several months, you will have the excitement of being threatened
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with bombs, and possibly even attacks to your computer (now who would
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want that?!?!). these threats are usually said as follows:
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Ex-Boyfriend: i have a new years resolution...
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one word: revenge.
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*or*
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Ex-Boyfriend: i bought a gift for you, it detenates in 10
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seconds, have a nice day.
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with all this information on why you should or shouldn't date the
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devil, i hope that you will be able to save yourself before your life
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and emotions are so rudely flushed down the toilet.
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P.S. --> mogel's input:
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<mogel> um, the devil is pure evil so he can make his penis into
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a german shepard and have it eat up a woman's insides
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<mogel> and then she'll be in a lot of pain
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<mogel> and she might die
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*NOTE: this is considered a PRO in mogel's twisted and evil mind.*
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Lord have mercy on your souls.
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AMEN. (or something.)
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!!========================================================================!!
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!! (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! #280 - WRITTEN BY: ANJEE - 11/9/98 !!
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