102 lines
5.8 KiB
Plaintext
102 lines
5.8 KiB
Plaintext
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$$$$$$$$$$$
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$$$$$$$$$$$ hogz of entropy #196
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$$$$$P $$$$ $$$$ moo, oink, up your butt.
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$$$$P $$$$ x$$$$
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$$$P $$$$ xP$$$$ d$$$$$$$$$$$.
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$$$. $$$$xP $$$$ $$$$$$' >$$$$
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$$$$$$$$$. $$$$P $$$$ 4$$$$$. .$$$$'
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$$$$'`4$$$b. $$$$ $$$$ 4$$$$$$$$$P'
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$$$$b 4$$$$b. $$$$$$$$$$$ 4$$$< %%
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$$$$$b 4$$$$$x $$$$$$$$$$$ 4$$$$$$$$$ %%
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>> "Marching Over Me" <<
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by -> Leprekon
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I was sitting on the train today and I looked up from my page and
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suddenly I was falling.. I was torn from the world that I where life was a
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thing of true beauty and joy, and when my feet landed, I coughed and winced
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the pain.
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The life I was leading so enwraped in my book was heavenly.. a
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mixture of futuristic hustle & bustle & love of life and others.. How
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wonderful.. When the book was put down, I tried to pull back my tears, to no
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avail.. the world that surrounded me was one that didn't care, didn't feel
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and just plain didn't understand. Face after face looked up, and then
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down.. the eyes cold and surrounded by cloaks of social facade. And then I
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saw her.. wondering suddenly if she was real or if I was simply
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hallucinating from want and need.. burning in my head.. she smiled and then
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she saw me.. the smile was gone and she was staring intently.. curious.. her
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head cocked.. and the eyes were warm, understanding .. finally I felt it..
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the love, and the pain was insignificant.. I didn't feel a thing.
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I was in a trance..the world that surrounded me in this speeding
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capsule ment nothing as I was sure already that it was meaningless before
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hand.. but now.. it simply wasn't there..
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five minutes and the train came sliding to a halt at my station and
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she got off. I lept to my feet, feeling no urgency to get to my
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destination.. not even caring that this was my stop, but mearly trying to
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follow her.. stay with her.. forever..
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She disapeared and re-appeared in and out of the struggling crowds of
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people marching endlessly toward their day-to-day, working slowly to
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complete their life as the cloak displayed it. She would re-appear and our
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eyes would meet then gone, and again.
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We entered a large tunnel.. nearly 600 metres in total.. a stretch
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from the station to the main street of the city.. no corners.. no exits, but
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for two.. the station.. and the street.
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I smiled inside and out.. I knew that this would give me the time I
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need for the battle, the fight to keep up, and find her all over again. As I
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walked through the tunnel I saw her again and again and for a time I really
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appeared to be getting closer to her.. I could almost smell her scent,
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comforting me as I paced and darted through streams of zombies that may as
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well have been maniquins in my eyes. When, without warning, my surroundings
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changed.. all the people once strolling through the tunnel looked up and
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straight.. No longer looking down at their feet in some confused daze, or
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possibly even the trust in the farmiliarity of it all, they looked now to be
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focused on one central goal. I was so happy with the very concept that I
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almost lost track of my goal, the girl, the eyes so warm now in my heart..
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but fading.. why?
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I remembered the train and my heart warmed once more and I searched
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the tunnel for those farmilliar eyes.. the look of her, and her smell.. The
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footsteps on the cold hard tiles of the tunnel were once very random and
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chaotic as people went about their own target. their own goal, but now they
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all seemed to fall in line.. uniform motion.. step.. step.. each one
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drumming through my mind and echoing into the recesses of my conciousness,
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hammering me down further down the spiral that I was in, losing her..
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forever.
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In the final steps toward the street I searched harder than I have
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searched for anything in my life.. with more dedication and pasion .. but
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she was gone.. and now there would be no way to get her back. The moment my
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mind registered the loss she was gone completely.. I couldn't even remember
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her face or those eyes, nor the scent that warmed me in the winter cold of
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the tunnel. She was truely gone from my life all together.
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In an instant I blinked when the sound of the last marching step
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echoed through my head. When I reopened my eyes, the army was gone, its task
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completed, my deviance from the social path was averted, and I would once
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more conform. I looked around and all I could see were the same chaotic mass
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of people that were with me at the station. No army, no steps, no marching,
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no eyes, no warmth .. and I fell to the ground in a crouch with my back
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against the wall.. silently sobbing, I nodded.. "OK" I sobbed into nothing
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at all.. "OK" .. and with that I stood up, wiping the tears from my eyes,
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and steped on to the escalator that would take me to the street, and right
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outside my college. Another day, all the same, temptation, loss.
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Society's army has no co-ordinating force, no government, no written
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laws, but many rules. It would seem now that happiness is against the rules,
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and when one tries to deviate from the path, the army steps in.. stepping
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together and working together, without communication, to force you back onto
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the path. This morning I learned the hard way, and tonight, upon my pillow..
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I will cry myself to sleep again.
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----------------------------------------------------------------------------
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* (c) HoE publications. HoE #196 -- written by Leprekon -- 1/26/98 *
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