53 lines
3.5 KiB
Plaintext
53 lines
3.5 KiB
Plaintext
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w _____ ____ 1 222 1 "Mein Jewlatto" w
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D // | \ 11 2 11 by Ciacco the Hog and D
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* || ____ | || | 1 222 1 Bob the Master of the World *
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G || || \ / | || | 1 2 1 issue #121 of "GwD: The American Dream G
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w \\___// \/\/ |____/ 111 222 111 with a Twist -- of Lime" * rel 05/17/02 w
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--- -- - -- --- -- - -- --- -- - -- --- -- - -- ---
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"Dreidel, dreidel, dreidel, I made you out of fried chicken."
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No, this isn't a Negroni masquerading as a Hebe. It is the song of the
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Jewlatto, the spotlight mixed race of the week. For those of you not in the
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know, the Jewlatto is the result of a union of the Negrous and Jewish races.
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While each race separately has endured derision and racism, the resulting
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Jewlatto enjoys only the most advantageous of the traits of the "afro-
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mentioned" races. While each race has been considered a regression of
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humanity, the Jewlatto is humanity's future. The face of the future sports a
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protuberant nose, DSLs (dick-sucking lips), and a "phat afro." Other physical
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traits of the Jewlatto include a mighty, athletic build and a fatty-lumpkin
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cock. Other than the nose, the Jewlatto possesses predominantly Negrous
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bodily characteristics, but this is offset by the mental inheritance from the
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Hebrewan parent. The Jewlatto will possess abundant natural intelligence as
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well as a "frugal" fiscal policy. Though the Jewlatto keeps a tight grip on
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his purse-strings, he will occasionally blow a lot of money souping up his
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ride and engaging the services of the "bitches and hoes." The Jewlatto's garb
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consists of a FUBU yarmulke and a girthy, diamond-studded Star of David (with
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a dollar-sign in the middle of it) on a gold chain. Sometimes amidst the
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curls can be found long Orthy locks. The Yid-kid (or "Levite") will be fluent
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in both Ebonics and Yiddish. He will listen to Two Live Jews and The Jew and
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His Motley Crew. Diet will consist of fried gefilte fish and watermelon,
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washed down with some kosher malt liquor. The Jewlatto is in rare form during
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the festive time of "Kwanzanakah." The Jewlatto's role models include George
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Washington Carverstein, creator of the fried peanut, and Shaniquah Streisand,
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the singing sensation. Based on our asinine but rigorous scientific research,
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we have found that the Jewlatto is more easily adaptable to the climate of the
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21st century than other passe racial mixtures such as the Hispanislopes,
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Pollwops, and "A-rabs."
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For more fun facts and to sign up to contribute to the Jewlatto Creation Fund,
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please visit www.jewlatto.org.
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--- -- - -- --- -- - -- --- -- - -- --- -- - -- ---
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Issue#121 of "GwD: The American Dream with a Twist -- of Lime" ISSN 1523-1585
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copyright (c) MMII Ciacco & Bob/GwD Publications /---------------\
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copyright (c) MMII GwD, Inc. All rights reserved :SEND MORE MONEY:
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a production of The GREENY world DOMINATION Task Force, Inc. : GwD :
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Postal: GwD, Inc. - P.O. Box 16038 - Lubbock, Texas 79490 \---------------/
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FYM -+- http://www.GREENY.org/ - editor@GREENY.org - submit@GREENY.org -+- FYM
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