textfiles/magazines/FUCK/fuck0506.txt

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=   F.U.C.K. - Fucked Up College Kids - Born Jan. 24th, 1993 - F.U.C.K.   =
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                         his plan, part ii
                         -----------------

                              one  

sometimes the state of brilliance can easily be mistaken for the state of
madness. then again, you could just be a lonely. i find myself border
lining in the boat most of the time.  sometimes i just want to sit in the
dark and let good ol' donizetti play the most comprehensible music to the
mood. sometimes i just want to drink. either way both events lead to the
same conclusion. they are just something to do to pass time, cuz hey, being
an alcoholic can pass the time pretty fast, specially when you have nothing
better to do with it.

getting up from the couch i could hear the tears in the music. i pour
myself another glass of wine, stand in front of the glass sliding door, and
look up at the stars. i hold the glass up to the moon to make a toast.
"well loui, it could be worse, i could be depressed." taking a big gulp i
set my drink down and decide now would be a good time for a long walk.
what else is a good walk for but to change your life. a person's life can
change in one second. how can you judge someone when there are more than 86
thousand seconds in a day. who knows what is going to happen next. well,
maybe the world isn't that chaotic, but my life sure is, or maybe it was
just the fresh air. 

usually i tend to avoid major streets when i take a walk, you never know
what kind of crazy person is going to enter your life. however, it was
that kind of randomness that i was looking for. it was that same
randomness that i found, or maybe it found me. while taking my thoughts
down broadway i heard a noise down a dark alley. suddenly a man walked out
from the shadow. i had never seen a human in such horrible conditions
before. you could smell him standing ten feet away. he walked right up to
me, and stared into my eyes. his eyes glowed a cold blue that i had never
seen before. he had a gold tattoo on his right temple. at first i was
scared, then he motioned to talk. 

"so gabriel, it is true, you are still working for him." he sort of
laughed under his breath and turned to walk back into the alley.

my fear turned to confusion, but before i could stop him to ask how he
knew my name, or what he meant, i heard a car honk. i turned around to see
that a really nice red bmw convertible had pulled up next to me.  i don't
know much about cars so 'really nice' is about the best that i can explain
it, i expected james bond to get out. the passenger side window rolled
down and i heard a sweet voice yell out to me, "hey! do you know how to
get to the brown palace hotel?"  well of course i did, its that brown
triangle building downtown that charges anywhere from $200 to $800 a
night. i guess that would explain the beamer.

"just take this all the way to 18th ave. turn left and take 18th until you
get to this funky intersection. you'll want to take the treemont route so
keep to the left side of the street, you don't want to turn too far to the
left or you will end up back on broadway again. anyway, right after the
funky turn you will want to be in the left most lane because the brown
palace is right there, just pull up and let the valet take care of you." i
don't know if she was confused or looking for a date because she looked
really lost in what i just said. 

"uumm.." was all she had to say about that. of course, if you're looking
for a date you usually don't pick up some weirdo walking down broadway in
your bmw. it was probably the suite, drives chicks wild. i offered myself
to her in the most innocent way i could muster up. 

"look, i'm not on my way anywhere, i am just out here passing time. i could
ride with you if you want? so you don't get lost." i felt like some reject
from pretty women. 

"how would you get home?" she asked, as if almost concerned. 

"well, i am out for a walk."  not trying to be a bit witty, but it made her
laugh anyway. 

"ok, hop in."  she sounded like a school girl. i didn't expect much of a
sophisticated conversation on the way there, that's ok, because i'm not a
sophisticated guy anyway. 

"so what takes you to the brown palace hotel? business or pleasure?" i
tried to make small talk, even though i hate it. 

"does it have to be one or the other?" 

"no, it could be both." 

i waited a few minutes for a reply when i noticed i had an enormous
headache, you've got to love wine. looking around the car i ask if she had
any aspirin i could take. 

"been drinking too much?" she asked. 

"there is no such thing as drinking too much." i replied, not caring what
she thought about it. she pointed to the glove box. i opened it up, pushed
the gun aside and grabbed what looked to be the aspirin. i popped a couple
in my mouth and looked around for something to drink. i should have thought
about that before i took the aspirin. 

"i can't dry swallow pills, do you have something i can wash these down
with." i asked. 

"the only thing to drink in this car is right behind your seat." she said
almost laughing. i saw the irony as i glazed at the half empty bottle of
one hundred proof absolute vodka. 

"oh well." i thought as i downed the pills with a gulp of one of my most
favorite drinks, vodka straight. i was either going to get more drunk and
not notice the headache, or the pills were strong enough to work.  i
laughed at that thought. i would have been fine except all of the sudden
the car started spinning around and i could hear a man laughing in my mind.
i was starting to loose reality again, right in front of this woman. 

"whoa, those are some pills." i said, trying to see if she would tell me
they were not aspirin but some sort of drug that would explain my current
state. 

"don't worry, you can deal with that where we're going. just keep
conscience, because you know where we are going." she said with a serious
tone in her voice. although i had no idea what she was talking about. 

"oh shit, you wanted to turn two blocks back." now realizing where we were.
"it's ok, just turn left here." after another, and then a right we were at
the hotel. i had seen the brown palace before, and just about everyone in
denver has heard about it. anyone who is anyone stays at the brown palace
hotel. the president has his own suite in it.  i stumbled out of the car
and managed to keep my ground. the fresh air did me good. i finally got my
first look at this woman who i have been talking to for the last twenty
minutes. my god was she beautiful. she had on this long dark overcoat, big
and clothy.  something you would see gillian anderson wear in the x-files.
she had this long dark hair and these pulsating blue eyes. they scared me
at first glance. it looked as though she could see into my soul. maybe that
is why she stopped for me. she had a small body and a face that could make
any person fall in love with her. 

"so what's your name anyway?" i asked, expecting aphrodite as an answer. 

"lilith." she replied, giving me a smile. 

"well, lilith, i must begin my walk home now. thank you for bringing some
excitement into my otherwise dull life." i said, hoping she would invite me
to where ever she was going. 

"you can't leave me yet gabriel, we have business to attend to." and her
plan unfolded. 

"we have business? how do you know my name?" as i almost fell to the ground. 

"you told me in the car. look, this will all be clear to you soon." she
began walking into the building. funny, i don't remember mentioning my name
in the car. then again i was kind of fucked up. then again i am always
fucked up. as i walked into the hotel for the first time i couldn't
actually see anyone.  i am sure there were people around me, but i couldn't
see anyone but her. she walked up to a counter, which i assumed was for
checking in, and started a conversation with thin air. everything seemed
blurry and i could feel myself losing balance. 

"my god." i could hardly talk. she looked at me, smiled, and then began
walking off towards an elevator. i caught up to her as she darted inside
one. i looked at her and stared hard upon her form. 

"i can barely stand, what were in those pills?" i questioned, beginning to
loose conscience. 

"only what you needed in them." she replied, "now stop thinking and just
let life and death take over." the elevator stopped, and so did my thought
process. i began mumbling something about trust. i don't know what the hell
i was talking about. she knocked on a room, i couldn't even read the
number. some indian opened the door and we walked into a cloud of smoke.
there were five native americans sitting in a circle on the floor. they had
lit a fire in the middle of the room, i couldn't figure out what in the
hell was going on. i felt something cold grab my shoulder and i spun around. 

"the tooth brush is in the back of my car, where the rest of my world
belongs." said an old man with no teeth. "what is this, dali's playground?"
i thought to myself, as one of the indians sitting on the floor got up,
opened his head and removed a saw. 

"it's time to cut the bullshit don't you think?" he said as everyone began
to laugh. i couldn't find lilith anyway in the room. just then i squeezed
my eyelids shut and started chanting. 

"these drugs are quick, these drugs are quick, these drugs are quick, these
drugs are quick, this isn't happening!!" i then snapped my eyes open as
lilith stood in front of me. 

"are you ok?" she asked, as if everything i just saw was in my mind. we
walked over to a couch and sat down. 

"yes, i suppose i am." i replied. 

"yes, as long as the man with the saw doesn't get you." she said with a
grin. suddenly i had complete control of my senses back. i could see and
perceive everything as is. however my reasoning was shot. i would have done
anything right then, all someone had to do was ask me. 

"i brought you here because i need you to help me do something." she said,
trying to sound reasonable. as if trying to sell me something, i laughed on
the inside, knowing i would do anything for her. 

"i need to talk to someone, i need to ask them to do something very
important, and i need your help to do it." she kept trying to explain. 

"yeah sure, whatever... i mean, anything." i caught myself trying to not be
rude. which, considering the situation i was in, was silly as i should have
been stark raving mad. 

"i need you to kill me. then in twenty minutes i need you to bring me back
to life." she made this request sound as though she wanted me to call her a
cab. 

"ok, what do you need me to do?" i was a little confused as to how she was
planning on doing this. 

"i need you to inject this drug into me, in thirty seconds it will kill
me." she pulled a syringe out of a little leather pouch i was unaware of
until this moment. "then, in exactly twenty minutes i need you to inject me
with this drug." she held up a different syringe. 

"ok." was the only word i could seem to conjugate. 

"i knew you would be cooperative." she smiled and laid back. i took the
syringe and injected the fluid just below her inner elbow. "thank you." she
said "see you in twenty minutes." she winked at me, closed her eyes and
slipped into the darkness. i knew nothing of where she was going. 

looking over the leather pouch i watched the digital clock spin down.
nineteen minutes to go. i picked up a syringe that looked identical to the
one i just injected in her. the fluid was a light shade of red. the stuff
used to bring her back was a dark orange. it is funny sometimes, when you
look at your life. one minute you are drinking wine alone in your house,
the next thing you know you are sitting over some woman who you just
killed. life is odd when you want it to be. 

i looked over the length of the needle as i wondered who in the hell
created the stuff. this was supernatural and science fiction rolled up into
one bizarre walk in the night. 

being completely out of my mind i did something anyone completely out of
their mind would have done. i looked at the timer which now read zero
minutes remaining, and freaked out. i wasn't paying attention and had no
idea how long it had been on zero. wasting no time i took the other needle
and stuck it into her, right next to where the other one has gone in. i
waited for five minutes for her to recover. i kept smacking her on the face
hoping she would come back. however it was no use, she was dead, and as far
as anyone knew, i was the one who killed her.  how could i ever explain
this to anyone? would anyone believe me?  maybe i could just leave her here
and never be suspected. maybe no one saw me come in with her. i went over
many scenarios in my head on how i could get out of this situation. then it
accord to me. at the time it seemed quite reasonable, however any sane
person would have struck me down just for the thought. 

i picked up the other red syringe. i glanced at it, and with a witty side
remark said "bottoms up." as i stuck the needle deep into my left arm. i
drained all of the fluid into my body and began to feel a relaxation that i
had never before felt. i think i even pissed my pants before all the lights
went out. 

                               two

i woke up in a strange place. that is the best that anyone could describe
it. everything seemed dark, i could barely see ten feet in front of me. 
however anytime i got close to something, a wall, or a person, they would
be perfectly visible to me. as if i had a light all around me. i could see
its effects, but could not the source. it was cold as well. not so cold
that i thought i might freeze to death, and i couldn't see my own breath,
but it was bitter cold, just enough to get to you.

i walked up to the first person i could find and asked him where i was.
his only reply was the most horrific laugh i have ever heard. after a few
minutes of waiting for him to stop laughing i began to walk away. i was
about five feet away from him and i could barely hear his laugh anymore,
even though i could see him still laughing like mad, my perception of him
dimmed down.  the same thing that would happen the farther you get from
someone in any situation. however here, wherever i was, my senses we at an
all time low, or crippled somehow. 

i walked around for about five minutes before i found any structure at all,
it happened to be a wall. i followed its course as it led me to a gate. it
was made entirely of metal, and was cold to the touch. it stretched up past
my vision. i could not tell if it was locked, rusted, or just jammed but it
would not open. i pounded fiercely on it as i screamed to get someone's
attention. 

"where am i?" i screamed at the top of my lungs. 

"in the land of infinity." said a man with an evil grin across his face. 

"the land of infinity? where is that?" i said calming down. 

"do you remember the last thing that you did?" he said, almost chuckling in
his words. 

"yes, i talked to this strange person who laughed at me." 

"no, no. the last thing you did before you got here? can you remember that." 

"no, i can't. well, i remember going out for a walk, then i seem to have
woken up here." 

"did you in fact wake up here?" he just stood there with the biggest grin
i had ever seen.

"yes." 

"then how do you suppose you got here, eh?" 

"i don't know!" i started yelling at the man, "i don't even know where the
hell i am, is this a dream?" 

"are you asleep?" 

"i don't know!" i began to get really annoyed, "why won't you just tell me
where i am?" i continued to yell. 

"think larger gabriel," another voice surrounded the dark. "think of the
moment which transpired exactly before you were here." i could here him,
but i couldn't see anyone else. 

"who are you, where are we, how do you know who i am?" i yelled, not easing
the anger in my voice. 

"calm down, one question at a time, all will become clear to you. after
all, we have eternity to talk about it." he found humor in his words as he
giggled upon them. he stood in front of me wearing all black. i couldn't
differentiate his outfit with the surrounding darkness. he looked like a
floating head and hands. 

"who are you?" i began, in a calm manner. 

"actually, i will answer your last question first. after all it is not
everyday we get regular celebrities down here." he said, as though i should
already know the answer to his question. 

"celebrities? what do you mean?" 

"don't try and be coy with me gabriel, you can't play mind games like i can." 

"what are you talking about? why won't anyone just give me a straight
answer around here?" i started to get annoyed again. 

"do you really not know? what could have happened to you that would have
you end up here? what could have happened to you to make you forget
everything that has happened over the last eon?" he asked with a confused
look upon his face. 

"where am i? just answer me that." 

"why, this is aussou, the third level of hell, the bottomless pit. here we
are bound by chains of darkness. placed here by god himself. or,"  he let
out a quick laugh, "as jude said, we are bound beneath the darkness in
everlasting chains." he then let out a sigh, "do you not recognize?" 

"hell? did i die? this doesn't look like hell, where is all the fire,
where are the demons with pitchforks and eternal burning souls?" he began
to laugh as i said this.

"through that gate if you really want to know. however that gate won't open
until the fifth trumpet sounds. don't you read the bible anymore?" 

"no, i have always had a phobia to religion.  i could never explain it,
but i never really thought much about it though, i always just kept to
myself."

"wow, i wonder what you did to get this whacked up." 

"what do you mean?" 

"do you still not know who you are? can you not remember the conversations
we've had? all the so called great things you have done for him and his
plan?" 

"i know who i am, but i don't know what you are talking about." 

"you are gabriel, the archangel. only surpassed in rank by micheal." 

"archangel? if that is true then how come i can't remember all these things
you say?" 

"that is one question i cannot answer. none of the rest of us experienced
any sort of memory loss when being sent here. i guess you will just have to
wait until we get out of here." 

"when will that be?" 

"you really should have read the bible. unfortunately we don't have a copy
down here, not like anyone would read it anyway. like i said, when the
fifth trumpet sounds a dot of light will descend from heaven and unlock the
gate to the bottomless pit. we will charge out from the pit in the shape of
the locusts who are like horses prepared for battle. abaddon will come out
of the pit and strike down three of the seven horns of the beast. he will
then stand larger than any other horn and raise up three new horns to take
there place, and so on and so forth. any of this sounding familiar to you?" 

"none of it. however that still does not answer my question. when is the
fifth trumpet going to sound, or whatever it is that needs to happen?" 

"right after the sounding of the forth trumpet." he laughed. 

"well when the hell is that?" 

"i don't know!" he yelled. "do you think any of us actually understand his
plan? do you think any of us know what is going to happen and when? the
bible isn't a list of detailed instructions for what is going to happen. it
is a guide, it is supposed to give us a general idea of what has happened
and what is going to happen. he gave those humans just enough evidence to
let them believe in him, without giving anything away. we aren't meant to
understand these things, we are meant to carry them out. do you understand?" 

"no, but i don't think that matters does it?" 

"not really." 

"well, who are you then, and what exactly is this place? i have never heard
of the third level of hell, i didn't know hell had levels." 

"i am ezeqeel, he who teaches the knowledge of the clouds. i'm am also the
only angel here who will talk to you." 

"you're an angel? what are you doing in hell if you're an angel?" 

"this is abussou. this is where god sent the fallen angels when we betrayed
him by taking humans as our wives. we sinned against him, we sinned against
heaven. that was the first time we realized that nothing escapes him, that
was the first time we got a real glimpse at his plan." 

"you mean god?" 

"now you're catching on." 

"let me get this straight. so you're telling me, that i have died and gone
to the third level of hell, which is a bottomless pit where fallen angles
are bound by chains of darkness, and i cannot leave until the fifth trumpet
sounds?" 

"yes." 

"on top of all that, i am some sort of archangel?" 

"yes." 

"as well, you have no idea why i don't know any of this." 

"that pretty much sums it up." 

"ok, then i only have one thing to say. who the fuck are you, you sick ass
fucking weirdo crazy. where hell am i, why have you brought me here, take
me home right the fuck now." i was screaming at the top of my lungs. 

he just looked down and sighed. looking up i could see a tear roll down his
face "i wish i could give you what you want, you'll get used to it here, we
all did." with that he quickly vanished. 

i hollered out for someone to talk to me. i began to bang on the metal
gate, trying desperately to get it to open. nothing happened, nothing at
all. i sat down and leaned against the gate and began to cry. i put my
hands over my eyes and sobbed. 

                               three

i woke up in a garden. the most beautiful thing i have ever seen.
everything was too green, the air was too fresh. there was no one anywhere
i could see. the only thing man made i could find was a cement path going
off as far as my eye could see. here my perceptions where at an all time
high. i could see father than ever before, i could smell flowers 20 feet
away, i could hear birds chirping a mile away. it was the most exhilarating
experience i have ever felt. i shouted out, "is anyone here?" 

"i'm here." sounded that sweet voice i heard not too long ago.  i turned
around and saw lilith standing behind a tree. 

"lilith, i am glad to see you." 

"what happened to you?" she said with a smile. 

"i was looking at those syringes, examining them, pondering their existence
and creation. i looked down and noticed the counter had hit zero. i
panicked and tried to bring you back to life but you never came back. i
don't know how long the timer had been on zero, so i panicked some more and
decided the most reasonable course of action would be to kill myself."  i
found it weird that i knew all this. since a few moments ago when i was at
that other place i couldn't remember any of it. 

"that wasn't reasoning, you were told to kill yourself." she looked around,
concerned, as if we were being watched. "look, you did the right thing,
don't worry about it. that orange stuff was just kool aid, i never said it
would bring me back to life, i just said you needed to inject it into me."
she grinned as though i would find humor in her words. 

"you mean, i killed myself for your game? how do i go back?" 

"you don't get it yet gabriel. you aren't going back, you are the person i
needed to talk to, however i couldn't talk to you on earth because you
would have thought i was crazy if i explain what i needed you to help me
with. besides, you couldn't help me on earth anyway." for some reason, i
wanted to be mad at her, it felt like a natural thing to do, but i
couldn't. something was holding back my anger. 

"could you please explain to me what is going on here? after all i did die
for you." i couldn't seem to think one wrong thought. everything was good,
everything was right. it wasn't that the grass was greener, it was that i
was greener. 

"come, walk with me gabriel. i will tell you as much as i can." we began
walking down the cement path towards what looked to be a giant city. i
could not see the city before we had stepped on to the path, and the
garden that was there, was now gone. nothing but rolling green fields on
either side of me. behind me the path went on forever.

"you see," she continued "i am on sort of a covert operation." she said, as
she waited for a response. 

"ok." was my response. 

"well." she was reluctant to go on. "do you even know who you are?" she had
stopped and looked right at me, as though there was no way for her to
explain what was going on. 

"i am gabriel. this angel in hell told me i am, or was, an archangel.
although i don't know anything about it." 

"you must have talked to ezeqeel."

"you know him?" 

"everyone knows ezeqeel. he used to one of his best angels. that was until
him and the other earthly angels fell." 

"yah, he mentioned that they took humans as wives or something." 

"pour ezeqeel, stuck in abussou and he doesn't even know the scope of what
had happened to them." 

"what do you mean?" 

"for the most part he was right, the angels fell because they took humans
for their wives and copulated with them. however you need to understand why
they were persuaded to do it in the first place. you have to understand
what it is to fall from his glory. being in god's light is the most
wonderful thing in existence. each one of them knew that if they betrayed
him they would never see that light again. of course they thought god would
just abandon them, they had no idea they would feel his wrath. do you know
what it is like when someone crosses you? the anger you can feel, the rage
that possesses you? imagine next that you have the power of god. what would
you do to the ones who cross you? ban them for eons in the third level of
hell maybe? no one even knew what the third level of hell was until that
happened." she paused for a moment. 

"this is all very entertaining, but you were about to explain why he didn't
realize the scope of what had happened." 

"yes, well, it wasn't their fault you see. they were tricked and lead into
their situation. loui and i ha--" i started laughing. "what is it?" 

"nothing really, it's just that when i was a child i had an imaginary
friend named loui. when i was 12 he said that he would always be looking
down at me from the moon, and then i never saw him again." 

"you speak of the same person i just mentioned. loui is just what his close
friends call him, everyone else calls him lucifer." 

"you mean my imaginary friend for six years of my life was actually the
devil?" i said with some surprise. 

"yes, let me explain. loui and i had tricked the fallen angels into doing
what they did. they had no idea where it would take them." 

"but why?" 

"like i said, we didn't know what was in the third level of hell, all we
knew is that is where he would send them. so we had to play our part in his
plan to find this out." 

"when i was down there they said that there was no way to get out, how did
i end up here?" 

"who has access to all of hell? loui got you out of hell and i got you into
heaven." 

"so this is heaven, but why?" 

"i told you already, we need your help." 

"what makes you think i will help you?" 

"gabriel, ezeqeel was right, you are an archangel, but you don't remember
any of that. do you have any idea why you ended up in abussou after you
killed yourself?" 

"no, not really." 

"try and put it together, that is where the fallen angels are sent." 

"you are telling me that i am a fallen angel?" 

"yes." 

"do you know what happened to me?" 

"no, as far as we can tell micheal and god himself are the only ones that
know the full extent of what happened. all i can tell you is what we have
found out." 

"well, what have you found out?" 

"something happened to you, so god turned you into a human. at the end of
your life you were to be sent to the bottomless pit with the rest of the
fallen ones. we have no idea why you were made human first, but we think
this is why you can't remember anything. humans cannot remember anything
about this existence once they are born. this is all i know." the city was
approaching quickly. 

"so you think i will help you because i am a fallen angel, if i betrayed
god once, then i will do it again, is that it?" 

"you never miss a thing." 

"i don't know, this feels good. i didn't like hell, i didn't like being
there. here though, everything is wonderful, everything is alive and real." 

"it gets dull after a while." she smirked. 

"is that why you fell?" 

"do you even know who i am?" 

"you're lilith." 

"does that mean anything to you?" 

"no." 

"i am lilith, demon of lust. i was adam's first wife, before eve. i was
created by god from his imagination, just as man was. i was created with
flaws. i guess you could say i was the first nymphomaniac. i was a power
hungry beast of lust and passion. god could not control me so he expelled
me from eden and that is when i met loui for the first time. god decided he
wanted woman to be more like man, so he created eve from adam. this was his
biggest mistake. he had us right the first time, he should have just
accepted our nature. inside each female lies lilith, it is who we are.
being created from man just masked it a little. eve was our first plot
together. it was much more easy to persuade her than i had thought." 

"what was your idea?" 

"to get eve to eat the forbidden fruit from the tree of knowledge. 
certainly you know that much about the bible." 

"yes, i heard about it." 

"of course. you do have to remember that loui is an angel. he may be
ha-satan, the devil, lord of all evil, but he is still an angel. angels
aren't exactly the most creative of beings. they blindly follow god. loui
was the first angel to show some sort of self thought." 

"thanks a lot." 

"in case you forgot you became human, you think like they do. you may still
be an archangel, but you have all the spark of humanity in you." we were at
the city now. "we're here. are you going to help me?" 

i was reluctant to respond. "i just don't know." 

"you have no idea what is going on here gabriel. all i can do is ensure
that it will be worth it for you to help us." she had moved close to me,
and gave me a look of absolute sexual intention. 

"well, in that case, why not." 

                               four

my first look at the city was one of wonder. it was like ancient greeks,
meet krypton. i halfway expected superman and hercules to drop by. the
first thing i noticed was a very sad looking man sitting against a wall. 

"heaven has bums?" i said. 

"that is semjaza. he is a reminder to all angels of what will happen if you
fall." 

"he is a fallen angel?" 

"yes." 

"why isn't he in abussou." 

"in a way, abussou is in him. before the angels sinned against god, semjaza
knew that what they were doing was wrong. regardless of what we told them
he knew that they might get in trouble for sinning against god. he swore to
take all punishment for their actions. as he put it, he would take the
penalty of a great sin." 

"this is his punishment? it doesn't seem as bad as abussou." 

"not at first glance. god possessed his entity with guilt, remorse, and
sorrow. he has to spend eons thinking about, and feeling sorry for what he
did. imagine feeling so bad about doing something that you want to kill
yourself, but can't. this is his punishment, every second of his existence.
would you still prefer it over abussou?" 

"on second thought, no. anyway, what is it you need my help with." 

"we are on our greatest mission ever. loui and i know that abaddon is to be
released from abussou soon. the first trumpet is close to being sounded. it
is written that loui will end up persuading abaddon into his conquests.
abaddon with be sort of like the public relations for the devil. however,
we want an edge. we want to know what is going to happen before it does, we
want to know how to play our cards right so that we end up winning the
apocalypse, not yeshua." 

"how do you plan on doing that?" 

"we plan on stealing his plan." 

"his plan?" 

"everything that has happened, and is going to happen, is all part of god's
plan. nothing happens that he doesn't know about. we want to change this." 

"well, then how do you plan on stealing the plan? one would think it is
harder to get than all the gold from fort knox." 

"he keeps his plan in naon." 

"naon?" 

"the temple of god." 

"i see." 

"you are going to help me get into the temple so that i can look at the
plan. i will obtain it, then we will leave, and you will be rewarded to
stand by our side and help be victorious over god." 

"i am a fallen angel turned human, and you are a well known demon partner
of satan. how do exactly expect us to pull this off?" 

"i am not as well know as you think, and you have an advantage you didn't
catch earlier." 

"what advantage is that?" 

"no one knows you have fallen. we think micheal knows, but no one has seen
or heard from him since you were made a human. god doesn't come around here
much. he is too busy unfolding his plan, taking care of the humans.
everyone else thinks you are on some great mission of god, they don't even
know you became human. we will just waltz in there like nothing is nothing." 

"won't people want to know what has been going on? what do i tell them i
have been doing all this time?" 

"you have been gone longer at times. they have all existed for so long,
that 26 years doesn't seem like very long at all. if anything they are
going to wonder why you were gone for so short a period. besides, no one
here really wants to try and figure out his plan any more. they just
accept it and follow out his orders. a long time ago there was a rumor
that one of the archangels figured it all out, but it doesn't seem to be
true since none of you know."

"we'll try it, but if it doesn't work i'm going to say you made me do it."
i chuckled, jokingly. 

                               five

we entered naon and it was just as lilith said. a few angels looked at me,
but none of them even made an effort to speak to me. i guess after being
existing for so long, you run out of things to talk about. 

as far as naon goes, it was the most spectacular construction i have ever
seen. lilith called it the center of everything known. it was in the center
of the city, which was in the center of heaven, which was centered between
earth and hell, and in the center of naon, was his plan. 

we made our way to it with ease. once we got to the room there was a locked
door preventing us from getting in. 

"this is great, how are we supposed to get past that?" i asked. 

"you can open it. only archangels can open this door. just think about it
being open, and it will open." 

it seemed silly to me at the time, but i did it and sure enough the door
opened right up. 

"after you beautiful." i said with a smile. 

"at last, we finally have the advantage." she said with a giggling school
girl voice. she practically ran into the room. the room itself was
completely dark expect for a light shining on a book in the center of the
room. it was just as i imagined. not waiting any further i stepped into
the room.

suddenly my head felt pounded on, like i was being filled with an eternity
of realization. i almost fell to the ground as it all hit me at once. i
remembered everything that i was, what had happened to me right before i
was turned into a human. i stepped back towards the door as i watched her
pick up the book. 

"this is it." she yelled as she picked up the book and opened it. a look of
confusion crossed her face as she looked through it. she flipped through
the entire book and looked up at me and yelled, "it is empty. this book is
full of blank pages." 

"what were you expecting lilith? you put it best when you said 'nothing
happens that he doesn't know about.'" she looked up at me with even more
confusion.

"what do you mean?" 

"i am the archangel gabriel. do you think that i would fall so easily?  we
do not blindly follow god. we do it because he is right, we do it because
he is perfect, we do it to stay in his light. this entire thing has been
part of his plan." 

"what for?" 

"for you lilith. you are right, abaddon is about to be released. sooner
than you think. the first trumpet is about to sound in just a few moments.
ha-satan will help him behind the scenes as was written. they will end up
at the apocalypse fighting against yeshua, and they will loose. they will
loose because of you. you were created for a reason lilith. god does not
make mistakes, that is what makes him god. you were designed for the soul
purpose of leading the adversary on for all this time. you were created to
influence him, to weed out the weak minded angels, to induce mankind with
free will. you were the catalyst, this is why you were created, with this
and no other purpose. you are no longer needed. lucifer will end this the
way it was meant to be." 

"you can't get rid of me." she screamed at me. 

"remember, only an archangel can open this door." and with that the door
was sealed, and lilith will now be trapped inside the center of naon for
eons. the last thing heard from her was a scream so loud every being in
heaven turned their eyes toward naon, just as the first trumpet sounded.

"so it begins?" i heard a voice behind me. 

i turned around and paused for a moment, startled. "yes, it begins
michael. the final stages of his plan."


                         the end . rage-303 


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