83 lines
4.1 KiB
Plaintext
83 lines
4.1 KiB
Plaintext
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= F.U.C.K. - Fucked Up College Kids - Born Jan. 24th, 1993 - F.U.C.K. =
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elevator dreams
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another day. i went to get lunch. i stood and waited for
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one of my co-workers, and this guy did the typical get
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in my way, i get out of his way, he gets in my way dance
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near the soda machine. a woman who worked there came up
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to me and opened her mouth as wide as possible and cackled,
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revealing a mouth full of missing teeth and and ranch
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dressing on her breath. she said loudly, "Shall we dance,
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madam?" it seemed heinous that the word madam should ever
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escape from her lips, and i pretended not to hear her.
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i got in the elevator, chatting inanely about work troubles
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with my co-worker. i watched an unattractive women with
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a nice body pick lipstick off of her teeth while she
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examined herself in the mirrored elevator walls.
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i got to my desk and stared at a web site unseeingly while
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i chewed on my toneless sandwich. i studied the grey walls
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in my office and imagined cracking the heads of the developers
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i work with while my office mate giggled insanely as he
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tried to fix a problem, his newly bought lunch sitting
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untouched on his desk.
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i read and responded to e-mail methodically, sipping coffee,
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and tried to fix our slow web site. visions of art twisted
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in my mind, and i longed to be home in my bathrobe, photoshop
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in front of me, graphics tablet in my lap.
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xterm -e vmstat 1&
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ps -ef | grep httpd
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netstat -rn
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unix, #include, blah blah. i am so tired of unix, so tired of
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my job, so tired of Colorado. i would rather be in a remote
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house with 5 cats and a freelance web design business and
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someone who would come home and ruffle my hair, pour me
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a glass of wine, ask me how my day was. i am tired of the clubs
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and the booze and the useless conversation. last night i read
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metamagical themas and burned candles and listened to classical
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music. that is me, not this baseball cap wearing tomboy
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who fixes web sites and broken builds and silly e-mail problems.
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no one is going to die if they don't get their princess diana
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update. she is already dead, nothing we can do. fuck 'em if they
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can't take a joke.
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my brother called last night, freshly installed in college,
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his voice vibrant and happy. i spoke to him with a smile on
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my face and a light tone, but i felt grey, lifeless. i would
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give the world to trade places with him, and regret my decision
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to not finish school, give up my life and loved ones in NY to
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be out here, alone. he is learning and debating and making new
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friends. i envy him.
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life is too still, out here.
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demonika
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= Questions, Comments, Bitches, Ideas, Rants, Death Threats, Submissions =
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= Mail: jericho@dimensional.com (Mail is welcomed) =
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= To receive new issues through mail, mail jericho@dimensional.com with =
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= "subscribe fuck". If you do not have FTP access and would like back =
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= issues, send a list of any missing issues and they will be mailed. =
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= AnonFTP FTP.DIMENSIONAL.COM/users/jericho/FUCK =
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= FTP.SEKURITY.ORG/pub/zines/fucked.up.college.kids =
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= FTP.GIGA.OR.AT/pub/hackers/zines/FUCK =
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= FTP.ETEXT.ORG/pub/Zines/FUCK =
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= WWW http://www.dimensional.com/~jericho =
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= http://www.reps.net/~krypt/fuck.html =
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= http://www.interlog.com/~lisa/f.u.c.k. =
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= (c) Copyright. All files copyright by the original author. =
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