79 lines
4.7 KiB
Plaintext
79 lines
4.7 KiB
Plaintext
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= F.U.C.K. - Fucked Up College Kids - Born Jan. 24th, 1993 - F.U.C.K. =
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Lost and Found
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I sit here alone on the balcony of a not unfamiliar apartment but
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one I have been accustomed to for less then the length of time it has taken
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me to smoke an entire pack of cigarettes (yes I was trying to quit at the
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time but you get my point). As I listen to the cars passing by and the
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omnipresent breeze carrying its song, and its winged passengers to wherever
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it is that birds go at this time of the year I am reminded, reminded of my
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constant displacement no matter the environment (quite the contrary to my
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apparent complacency to be any given place at any given time). This has been
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an ongoing battle in my head since I was about sixteen years of age, forced
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to face the world alone as a young man, a boy. Given the total lack of
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stability I had at the beginning of this long tiring journey of mine my
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total lack of stability at present doesn't bother me as one would expect, or
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does it?
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I've moved from the balcony into the computer room to continue
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this rant not because I don't like the outdoors, but because I find
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that I can type much faster and more legible than I can write these days.
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Another casualty of technology I guess.
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This trek I have unknowingly embarked upon has taken me to over
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twelve states in this country and several brief visits to a corrupted
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land far south of where I am now. In all these places I have heard the
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passing cars I hear now, and the same breeze blows whether it be from the
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north, south, east, or west. I guess what I'm really trying to say is
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that no matter where you go you never really leave where you were. The
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same instability is there, the same people are there with only faces that
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change. Sure no two people are alike but no two people are really that
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different either, there are good people, there are bad people, there are
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people you really wouldn't bother pissing on if they were on fire. Most
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importantly of all you are there, the same person you have always been.
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Maybe you have changed some things about yourself but you cannot escape
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from your true self. I don't know if this is what I was trying to do but I
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know now its of no use.
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In looking at my present surroundings I think I have found a
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location I would like to stay at for a while. The opportunity is here,
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there are people I like to be around here, even the view in certain
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places is quite majestic. Granted it does get rather cold at times but
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hey, you cant have everything. I know it will take some time for me to
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settle into a place of my own but I think its time for me to stop moving.
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I have heard my constant movement about the country referred to as "running"
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and "hiding", but I think of it more as living, and learning. I have
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learned a great many things from a great many people, much of which would
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be considered trivial to most people because they take the world in which
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they live in for granted. I have laid my head on concrete and I have laid
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my head on the pillows of thousand dollar a night hotels. Its still my
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head.
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zens
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= Questions, Comments, Bitches, Ideas, Rants, Death Threats, Submissions =
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= Mail: jericho@dimensional.com (Mail is welcomed) =
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= "subscribe fuck". If you do not have FTP access and would like back =
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= issues, send a list of any missing issues and they will be mailed. =
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= Files through AnonFTP FTP.DIMENSIONAL.COM/users/jericho/FUCK =
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= FTP.PRISM.NET/pub/users/mercuri/zines/fuck =
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= FTP.WINTERNET.COM/users/craigb/fuck =
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= FTP.GIGA.OR.AT/pub/hackers/zines/FUCK =
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= Files through WWW: http://www.dimensional.com/~jericho =
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= http://www.prism.net/zineworld/fuck/ =
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= (c) Copyright. All files copyright by the original author. =
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