267 lines
12 KiB
Plaintext
267 lines
12 KiB
Plaintext
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= F.U.C.K. - Fucked Up College Kids - Born Jan. 24th, 1993 - F.U.C.K. =
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Computer Sniglets
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-----------------
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Variety is the spice of life. So we add humor to the F.U.C.K.
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files. A new member, Overdriver wrote these the other night and most
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will be quite familiar with any computer geek out there. Enjoy them
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and laugh a little. -Dam
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By: Overdriver
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--------------
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Compucuss - the "colorful metaphors" said at your 'puter keyboard
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after you realize you just did something you
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didn't want to do.
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Entersec - the fraction of a second just before you hit <Enter>
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when you make sure in your mind this is what you
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REALLY want to do.
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Ttyyppeelexia - when you go to type one character and somehow two get
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pressed.
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Gamenonconformant - the ONE game that you can't exit by hitting <Esc>,
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<Alt X>, <Ctrl Q>, etc. like 99% of all the other games.
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Demowait - the period of time that you must wait for the credits
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to scroll by at the end of a demo.
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Grungeball - the film and dirt that accumulate on your mouse ball
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(this effect is applified in Lubbock).
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'Puter 'Putz - that annoying person who has a 486/66 and whose major
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is Home Economics or Political Science.
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Boardbuzz - the strange feeling you get when you're on a board and
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you suddenly wonder if the SysOp is watching everything
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you're doing.
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Floppyfly - that floppy that gets tossed across the room because
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chkdsk said it had a few bytes in bad sectors.
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GUI boundary - when your mouse falls off the edge of your mouse pad.
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Buffannoyed - when you hit a direction key meaning to move only a few
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spaces, but you go 20 more than you wanted to because of
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that damn buffer.
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Keyboard Blues - wishing that keyboard buffer was just a little larger.
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Printerfade - when you're printing out your final 20 page paper and your
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ribbon decides to run out of ink on the last page.
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Bytebite - when you have 1 byte less on a disk than you need.
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Switchflash - one of your power center switches that can't decide if
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it want's to be on or off.
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PonderWarez - wondering if that file is really worth downloading.
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Keyboard Condom - the cheap plastic covering that keeps dust off of the
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keyboard.
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Three and a half
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laugh - when you tease your friend because he still doesn't have
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a 3<>" drive.
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Micro-inch - the amount of extra length you need on your keyboard cord
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to comfortable sit somewhere else besides right in front
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of the monitor.
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Chessy-gif - those gifs whose resolution is a mere 320x200.
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Blasterclass - the various levels of status one receives determined
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by what Sound Blaster he owns (i.e. No Blaster, SB, SB
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Pro, or SB 16).
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Lock-a-sys - that annoying lock-up that cannot be bypassed by pressing
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<Ctrl>,<Alt>, and <Del> simultaneously.
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Gendernojive - when the cable you have is the opposite gender of the
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one you need.
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Blasterpop - the sound your SB makes EVERY time you enter or exit a
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game.
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Viriibye - when a virus makes interesting things disappear.
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Fedflam - guys who waste entirely too much time chasing pirates.
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Bustes
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Uncontrollables - the intense feeling you have when you seriously think you
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might actually get caught this time.
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Vouchbusted - when a person trying to get access to a board uses
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someones name and then that person in return denounces
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having any affiliation with the person trying to receive
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access.
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BBS hog - that person who has tied up the line to your favorite BBS
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who you find out (after having logged on 2 hours later)
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has not uploaded a single file or posted a single message
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and who you therefor deduce is a leech and must be shot
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immediately.
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Hard-drive scan - tediously going through every directory and sub-directory
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to find those little files you don't need to make room
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for something you really do.
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Hard-drive scan
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regret - wishing you hadn't Hard-drive scanned.
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Periphenvy - admiring someone else's CD ROM, Tape Back-up, etc.
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FTP - File Taking Periodically
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or File Taking Person
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Clickercount - the number of clicks that your mouse is supposed to be
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guaranteed to.
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Cablemosh - the jumble of wires behind your 'puter that appears to be
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a fire hazard of some sort.
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Combodip - the virtually endless number of DIP combinations, of
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which one trys every single combination because he lost
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the owners manual.
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VAX Virus - the disease people have who you ALWAYS see when you do
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a "show user" on the VAX.
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Bootingnum - a num key L.E.D. that just must come on at boot-up.
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Drivnesia - forgetting what type your HD is when your CMOS crashes.
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Cardincrementalism- when one originally decides to spend $100 on a card of
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some sort and then decides for only $40 more he can get
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one that's a little better, but ends up paying $180
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because if he's going to spend $100 he might as well pay
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$180 and get a good one, right?
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486scheming - sitting around all day thinking about how you could
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get a 486, not caring if it's ethical or not.
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P5prick - that asshole who is going to get a P5 the day it comes
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out.
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Warezwoes - state of being depressed because you didn't get any new
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SW today.
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Illstudylater - when you have a final the next day and instead of
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studying you are doing something completely
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unconstructive on your computer.
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OK - the two letters used most in a two-way chat.
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Protonogo - when that external protocol just doesn't want to work.
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Macattack - when, for some strange reason, a person has an urge to
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use a Macintosh.
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Joyride - the swirl (or center, push button; move to upper left,
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push button; move to lower right, push button) which must
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be done to calibrate your joystick.
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Papcrunch - the one piece of paper that just won't feed through the
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printer right.
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Cabanacongregation- the group of BBSers that can undoubtebly be found at Taco
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Cabana on Thursday nights, at 10, drinking.
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Covlexia - when, after installing something, the cover on your
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'puter just won't go back on as easily as it came off.
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Multi-Covlexia - when Covlexia occurs multiple times because the something
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you just installed didn't work the first few times.
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x86 fever - a condition when people feel they actually know a lot
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about 'puters because they know the difference between
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a 286 and a 386 (I've met some).
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Powswap - the act of switching power supplies with the hope nothing
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will fry.
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IcoulddoitifI
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wannaettes - people who try to convince you they could program in any
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language (if they really wanted to).
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Insertaphobia - the fear when installing a new card (i.e. I might break
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it, oops static).
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Generiname - those clones with names like "Missing Byte".
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Hardtofind - the ongoing and continuous search for more disk space.
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Keycravas - the space between keys on your keyboard where there is
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enough space for everything to fall down into, but not
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enough space for you to get anything out of.
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Nocrashit - the hope that, after you lock-up a BBS, hanging up will
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not crash it.
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dahhquestion - when you enter a command and the program prompts: "Are
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you sure you want to do this?"
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Setall - wondering if, without looking, the install program is
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named "Setup" or "Install".
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Subinstall - when, after obtaining a new game, you must use Subst to
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install it.
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Dirdork - the person, who every time he comes into your room, must
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do a directory on you computer to make sure you didn't
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get anything new and not tell him.
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Nointrophobe - a person who refuses to watch the intro on any game.
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Screwbye-bye - when, after disassebling your computer, you can't find
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one screw when you want to put it back together.
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Keybang - taking out your aggressions on your keyboard.
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Optidualtests - the various different speed testers you use on you 'puter
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in the optimism that you will find one which says it's
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faster.
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Digitrash - the accumulation of out-of-date computer parts and
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accessories others classify as junk, but which to you
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is treasure.
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Shockapart - acquiring a certain item simply for its shock value.
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Rompotporri - the CD which comes with all CD-Rom drives containing
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a lot of worthless SW.
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Processjam - the musical CD you listen to 4 out of 5 times you're
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doing something on your system.
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Formforgot - formatting a floppy before you did a directory.
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Extendaslow - when a program will slow down if EMM386 is loaded.
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Wastetyper - somebody who has nothing else better to do on a weekday
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than type up a stupid text file such as this one.
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-OD
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=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
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= Questions, comments, bitches, ideas, etc : z3mar@ttacs.ttu.edu : FUCK =
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=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
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= Official F.U.C.K. Distribution sites and information =
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= Board Number Other =
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= ----- ------ ----- =
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= Immortal Hate 806.745.8879 World HQ =
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= Ionic Destruction 215.722.0570 Eastern HQ =
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= PcI 806.794.1438 NUP: ORWELL WAS RIGHT =
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= Purple Hell 806.791.0747 Dist. =
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= Accounts NOT guaranteed on any F.U.C.K. distribution site. If you are =
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= interested in writing for, or in becoming a distribution site for =
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= F.U.C.K. call Immortal Hate, and apply for an account, or mail Dam =
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= at z3mar@ttacs.ttu.edu or on Immortal Hate. Knowledge is power... =
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