textfiles/magazines/DAMMIT/dam5.txt

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                   Issue #5 - 501 Things I hate - Part 3
                               By: Sir Robin


Welp, This is issue #5. 501 things I hate, 345 to 501. If there are any
repeats, sorry, I guess I hate that more than anything else.... Heh.

345. Sequenced Numbers
346. Re-Mixes
347. Mixers
348. MTV's Lip Service (Yeah, I bet that host gives some lip service to D.
Money, or whatever that DJ's name is)
349. Pictures
350. Scissors
351. Bad radio stations
352. Jumping
353. The smell of stew
354. Antennas
355. Rashes
356. People who hate Pearl Jam
357. (Good gun, ay?) Anti-Gun peoples
358. Garfield
359. Johnson
360. Jefferson
361. Lincoln
362. Grant
363. Washington
364. And all other ugly dead people that are shown on U.S. money
365. The way America's money looks
366. The cost of concert tickets
367. The cost of Concert Shirts
368. The cost of CD's
369. The cost of food
370. Hell, the cost of EVERYTHING
371. The national debt
372. Those little holes on the sides of dot matrix printer paper
373. Bad answering message messages
374. Answering machines
375. Rodney Peete
376. Buttons
377. Rain Coats
378. Thinking
379. Rest
380. This new area code 810 thingy in Michigan
381. AT&T
382. MCI
383. Sprint
384. Randall Cunningham
385. Greece
386. Flame
387. Jimmy Stewart
388. Bryant Gumbel
389. Page Down
390. Your Favorite color
391. Your dog
392. Birthdays
393. Talk radio
394. Spikes in your hair
395. Nose rings
396. Guts
397. Computer Mice
398. Links
399. Super Mario brothers
400. Milestones
401. Feelings
402. Nothing more than feelings..
(Yes that was a duplicate, so)
402. The corner of my mind
403. Penny Marshall
404. Egghead Software
405. The weekly top 40
406. CD Singles
407. Technical Data
408. Wesley Crusher
409. Bad Jokes
410. Those who think AD&D is satanic
411. Cool Moe Dee
412. The Harlem Globetrotters
413. Bark
414. Non-Surround Sound Stereos (Including Mine....)
415. The Sun
416. Uranus
417. Yer Anus (I know, kiddish. SORRY)
418. Catalogs
419. Not having enough money
420. Impotency
(Did you know smoking can cause impotency?)
421. Sports Announcers
422. Delta Force 3
423. Some guy named Guido
424. Speaker Phones
425. Farmington Hills Nightlife
426. Travel BattleShip
427. HollyWood Squares
428. Mr. Big (Big what? I'd like to know!)
429. Relevancy
430. Sweating
431. Junk
432. Junk Mail
433. Styrofoam
434. Emotion
435. Painting Houses
436. War
437. Hating Things
438. That thing on Gorbachev's head
439. Tar
440. Dead fish
441. Headaches
442. Toothaches
443. Noise
444. Dyslexic Satanists
445. Fake wood
446. Speed Screws
447. Tipper Gore (Mayhaps a repeat, but the bitch deserves it.) <Editor's
Note: Tipsy is the leading Music censorship activist. Let's Let her know how
we all feel....)
448. Disk cases
449. That smell
450. Weird Names
451. (Only 50 to go) Raccoons
452. Typo's
453. Bottle caps
454. Carl Lewis
455. Latches
456. Badgers
457. Woodland Animals
458. Mr. Wizard
459. Cheap speakers
460. Tyco Building Blocks
461. Not remembering a dream
462. Heat
463. Assistant Principals
464. WaREz D00dZ
465. Blacking out
466. Tom Wu
467. Robert Tilton
468. Typing Blindly
469. Betrayal
470. TLC
471. The Oval Office
472. Death Valley (Nice name, but...)
473. Censorship
474. Businessmen
475. Being Tired
476. The general Populace
477. Papa Smurf
478. He-Man
479. She-Ra
480. She-Man
481. He-Ra
482. Mothra
483. Cobbler's shops
484. Losing in paintball
485. Questions
486. English class
487. Science
488. The end of summer
489. Weekdays
490. Vacations
491. Gardens
492. Dizziness
493. Windows
494. Itching
495. Jungle Rot
496. A.M. Radio
497. People who think Alternative music is Soft
(Listen to a little MiNiSTRY. Good Stuff!)
498. That Jane's Addiction broke up
499. People who skipped to the end (LIKE YOU)
500. The fact that I only have 1 more to go. I was having fun.
And now, number 501. To quote Dennis O'leary (The guy on those MTV commercial
thingys, and the Bo Jackson Commercials)
501. NAPS! End of list.

That's it. 501. Damn, I did it.

End with some stuff

Mr. Joke:
Breathing Heavily and covered with sweat, the woman opened her eyes and sat up
in bed. She sat in the dark for a moment until she calmed down. As she reached
for the light, she said, "Joe, I just had the weirdest, most perverted dream."
  Then the light came on, and she rolled over to see a German Shepherd
sleeping next to her.

A Madcap Quote:
"People think I'm sane - But I'll Show them!"

                                 <DAMMiT>
                           "What's that Smell?"

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