231 lines
14 KiB
Plaintext
231 lines
14 KiB
Plaintext
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%% Houston Blinkie Letter %%
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%%--------------------------------------------------------%%
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%% Issue Two, Number One November 6 %%
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%%--------------------------------------------------------%%
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%% An American Nihilist Underground Society Publication %%
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%% %%
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News
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----
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Well, blinkie running in Houston has suffered lately because of the
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weather, so we've had to turn to indoor entertainment to keep our psychotic
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little minds busy. Naturally, this means that we've developed new techniques
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for nifty things you've always dreamt about.
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As you read through this issue, you may notice various usages of words
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like "bingos", "dinks", "scam", "blinkie" and other things not commonly
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associated with the English language. However, just like that II+ you're
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taking to college, English needs a lot of modification before it can
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comfortably do some chores. A case in point would be saying "Night-time Safety
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Flasher" for "blinkie" in every one of our text files. Kind of redundant, si?
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Last Rites
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----------
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Given the fact that the Houston modeming community, especially for Apple
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users, was never that good, it comes as no surprise to many people that it is
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now totally dead. There are now two remaining Apple boards in Houston; one of
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them is a munchie haven ad the other is rapidly descending in that direction.
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With two boards recently pulling any decent transfers they had left off their
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hard drives or going down, it seems that the funeral of Apple II support over
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phone lines in Houston is close at hand. Too bad, and we didn't even ask to
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live here.
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Since modeming has tubed for the most part, with Houstonians receiving new
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software for download days or even weeks after the rest of the country, many of
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us are turning to new ways of acquisition. Sometimes this means phreaking or
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liberation of software, but more often, it means watching month-old betas crash
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out on your machine. What most people fail to realize is that many of us in
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Houston don't want to do a lot of long distance calling; our computer is not
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our life. We enjoy modeming or computing as a hobby, but don't want to
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dedicate too much time, money or effort to it.
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Naturally, this gap in the software acquisition game means that all of
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four people left in Houston haul out their Apple Cat and ragged copy of Phantom
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every other weekend and hit their favorite PBX or extender to gain some
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long-distance sustenance. Of course, every few months one or more has an out
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of body (out of anus) experience with the American "legal justice system."
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Slowly but surely, a John Sculley wet dream is coming true in Houston: Apple II
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support is collapsing.
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Three Ways to Get Free Disks
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As anyone who has ever owned any Apple knows, disks seem to disappear
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rapidly, especially when new software comes bounding in over the phone lines.
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To secure more of these precious objects, one must either a) buy them, or, the
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more favorable b) steal them. Shoplifting a whole box is a nice way to do it,
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but as more and more people explore this new way of gaining magnetic media,
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shopowners and exployees alike are taking precautions against unauthorized disk
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liberation.
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This situation leaves the average user in a hole. How to get disks
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without much risk or cost is a simple endeavor, given the nature of major
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bookstores.
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Apple people are unique in that the one or two magazines put out for the
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Apple don't come with a disk inside the magazine but instead force the user to
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subscribe or mail-order it. Amiga people, on the other hand, are prone to
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leaving magazines full of disks loaded with junk programs nestled among the
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others on the computer racks. Several of the more well-known magazines that
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carry disks are: Antic's Amiga Plus, Compute's Amiga Resource and AmigoTimes.
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These magazines all bear the prominent label "Disk Inside" followed by one or
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more exclamation points in bold type. If you open the magazine to the center
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of bulk, you will find a disk sealed in a plastic or paper-product envelope,
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hopefully safe from the casual thief. Wrong.
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Any major bookstore will carry one or more of these magazines, usually at
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one end of their computer section. Generally the salespeople ignore these
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magazines, since all sorts of funny-looking people come in to examine them.
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Also, most major bookstores are crawling with people doing strange things
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anyhow, and there are usually only two salespeople trying to cope with the
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masses wriggling their way through the store. As a result, lifting these disks
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becomes child's play in the hands of anyone even remotely professional. The
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needed skills are smoothness and some dexterity, but nothing a rhesus monkey
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couldn't handle.
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Proper attire for this event are pants that are baggy but not overtly so,
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and accompanying casual but not cheap shirt and shoes. If you have an Polo or
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Izod shirt and some dockers or good khakis, wear them along with some
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comfortable dress shoes. Don't come in in your Metallica: Metal Up the Ass
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T-shirt and sandals, but do dress casual. This way, you don't merit a second
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glance in the eyes of most salespeople.
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Bring with you a small but sharp pocket knife and a friend. As you go
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into the shop, take notice of your surroundings, especially any security
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cameras or funny-looking mirrors. Also, get a visual count of salespeople, and
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how many people are in the store. If the salespeople appear to be almost
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constantly busy and more customers are coming in, go to work. Amble leisurely
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over to the magazine rack, and start reading something like Road and Track or a
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similar car magazine. Instantly, you've become the antithesis of a threat in
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your average salesperson's eyes, and he ventures off to help someone else. As
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soon as the visual contact from all salespeople is diverted, pick up a stack of
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Amiga magazines and hand it to your friend. Do the same with every magazine
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that has a disk in it, taking all but one, and replacing them with a
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similar-size magazine from another stack, leaving one magazine on top. Sneak
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the magazines to behind one of the bookshelves and let your friend keep watch.
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Quickly, open each to the page of the disk, and slit open the envelope. Yank
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out the disk and store it in the confines of your pocket. Once you've
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liberated each disk, stow the stack of now-useless magazines underneath some
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coffee-table books and leave the store.
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A crafty person can come out of an average bookstore with ten to fifteen
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disks, but it's best not to overdo it, so only take 3-5 from each store at
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maximum. If you hit three or four stores, you can easily equal the take from
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one big store without blatantly alerting them to the holes in their security.
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The mentality runs like this: they expect a certain percentage lost, so if
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five magazines disappear from the racks, they don't worry, even if it happens
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month after month. But if one day fifteen of such magazines turn up gutted,
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they will react in some unpleasant way. It's always best to hit chains, since
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they're the slowest to react since most policy is made at the regional
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headquarters office and not at the store. Also, chains take the loss much
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better than a Mom and Pop place.
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Of course, you could always liberate five magazines, but it's much safer
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to walk out of the store with a pocketful of disks instead of a bagful of
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magazines. At many stores, most notably B. Dalton's, security is so lax that
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it would be incredibly easy to liberate multiple media, but be careful not to
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overdo it, as it can alert the shopkeepers to a potentially serious problem.
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Another way to get easy and free disks is to hit demonstration computers.
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Radio Shack is the best for this, since they always have out one of their
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Mickey Mouse compatibles, usually with a drive loaded with a one megabyte 3.5"
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floppy all ready to go, and often with more copies of useless Tandy utilities
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scattered on the desk. Salespeople are usualy off helping someone find some
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microscopic resistor in the bargain bin, and if not, friends of yours can
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appear wanting to discuss the intricacies of VCR's, stereos, TV's and talking
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dolls if necessary.
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The stores have only one disadvantage: the security dome mounted on the
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ceiling of most stores. Often, these things are not in operation, but it's
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really impossible to know. Also, there is often a one-way window mounted at
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the back of the store, but this is usually not actively manned, and cannot see
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most of what goes in toward the front of the store due to poor visibility and
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obstructions in the line of sight.
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Generally, every store has one of two configurations: the bowling lane or
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the jungle. The bowling lane is the kind that most often lacks security
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cameras, but always has the magic window. A store that is one long strip, with
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displays on either side leading to the back of the store would be classified as
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a bowling alley store. On the other hand, a store where displays are clumped
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toward the front in no particular order, other than to sometimes channel people
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toward the expensive and worthless Tandy computers, is usually known as a
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jungle setup. Either one is easy to hit for small stuff, because pillars,
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bookshelves and computer setups obscure vision from most areas. Also, the fact
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that Radio Shack attracts lots of people who are interested in small,
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complicated and hard-to-locate gadgets is your ally. Salespeople are most often
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busy locating and describing some electronic device and don't pay attention to
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innocuous people in average clothes.
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The easiest way to snag is to walk in with a small bag containing, say, a
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magazine or paperback, and sit down at a Tandy generic computer. After the
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salesman has either queried you about your desires or ignored you due to
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business needs, punch the button on the disk drive and grab the disk when it
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pops out. Slide it into your bag. If you are in a direct line of sight with a
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security camera, have a friend bend over the computer and shield you. Grab
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disks until you've exhausted all of the exhibits, but remember to look around
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you, since often whole boxes of them, filled to the brim with useless
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TandyWare, are left near a demonstration model. Grab these, too.
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Tandy disks are of good quality, especially the 3.5"'s, and if you cover
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them with a mail-order disk label, aren't bad aesthetically, either.
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One of the easier ways to shoplift disks is to avoid taking them out in
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the box, a common error made by many tyros to the task. Wear a bulky jacket or
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loose pants to a store and casually peruse the 3.5" disks. When no one is
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actively watching you, carefully slip the box of disks into your pants or
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jacket. Next, walk to a secluded corner of the store and take out the disks.
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With your handy pocket knife, slice open the box of disks and empty equal
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amounts into pockets. Drop the trashed disk box on a shelf someplace and get
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out of the store. This defeats any hidden security mechanisms in the wrapper,
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UPC symbol, ID sticker, etc. and is safer than walking out with a whole box
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crammed in your crotch anyway.
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Blinkie News
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Although recent runs have slowed, we still haven't neglected our civic
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duty to steal blinkies. Unfortunately, it seems that the City of Houston's
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irregular buying pattern has complicated things unnecessarily. More new and
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heinous designs of bolts created to complicate our thefts have appeared. They
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have been divided into three categories: variations on the 19mm bolt, roundhead
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bolts and forget it bolts. The third category is named because it is not worth
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messing with - the tools required are too specialized and would take up too
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much time.
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The 19mm bolt comes in a standard sheathed version, a version with one
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corner sheared off and a "figure eight" version. The standard version can be
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cranked off with a blinkie tool, and the "figure eight" bolt can be removed by
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inserting needle-nose pliers into the two indentations and twisting. As for
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the sheared bolt, we don't have much information on it at this time.
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Right now, Houston is experiencing a blinkie lull - not many blinkies are
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appearing on the streets now due to lack of construction sites to put them on.
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However, Houston is gearing up for numerous construction projects in 1990,
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starting in the first few months and stretching well into summer. Judging by
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the speed at which construction progresses in Houston, they may even stray on
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well into the next year as well.
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ANUS members are preparing for the next onslaught of blinkies, keeping in
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mind that the mayoral election will decide much of what will occur in the world
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of blinkie running in the future. If contender Fred Hofheinz wins, it is
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likely that more corruption will break loose in the construction ranks, leading
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to cheesier blinkies more like the "Flasher Flare." These blinkies will be
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easier to steal, but won't be worth keeping. It is probable that if incumbent
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Whitmire takes the race, Houston will continue to have a steady supply of
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decent quality blinkies worth stealing. Hopefully, whoever wins will decide to
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put more money into driver protection, especially in the wake of recent
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accidents in which drivers have gone off roads and into ditches around
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construction sites.
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Conclusion
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This issue of HBL has contained what we hope are useful data to all of you
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out there. If you've enjoyed this file, or have any
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suggestions/ideas/corrections, let us know. You can find most ANUS members on
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Houston's remaining Apple II boards.
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Quotes
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------
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"Bend over and cough"
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-- John Sculley
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"MUNCH!"
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-- Houston's "Sysops For Responsible Modem Use"
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"M - Change Handle"
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-- From the main menu of the Rooftop Hideaway, another great Houston
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Apple board
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"What?"
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-- J. Danforth Quayle
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11/6/89 -- CC/CD/RF/MO
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