254 lines
12 KiB
Plaintext
254 lines
12 KiB
Plaintext
JOINT CUSTODY : A SIMPLISTIC SOLUTION
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BY : Robert D. Felner & Lisa Terre
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The crux of the joint custody debate highlights the conflict
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between lawyers and mental health professionals and demonstrates
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what can happen when each pursues a narrow course of action with
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little consideration of the larger picture. For Lawyers, given
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the shift toward equal parenting rights and the courts'
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predisposition to grant custody to the parent who demonstrates
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the most cooperative stance, joint custody can be a potent
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settlement weapon. From the therapist's point of view, joint
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custody is at best a double-edged sword. Although it enhances the
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concept of equal parenting, it is not the King Solomon-type
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custody standard it has been touted to be. A look at its origins
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shows why.
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The shift to joint custody occurred in the context of
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several social movements which sought to :
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- establish equal parental rights;
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- recognize the importance of fathers in the parenting
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process;
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- ensure postdivorce paternal involvement with children;
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- increase the probability that parents would meet support
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obligations;
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- remove the burden of single parenting from mothers so that
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they could more fully pursue their own postdivorce lives; and
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- guarantee continued active involvement of two loving
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parents with their children.
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Initially, the research seemed to indicate that on all these
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levels, joint custody was a smashing success:
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- fathers were found to be highly involved with their
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offspring;
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- both parents were reported to be generally satisfied with
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the arrangement;
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- relitigation rates were lower than in traditional sole
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custody awards; and
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- children of joint custody households seemed to thrive
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better than the "typical" postdivorce child.
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Here at last was a good solution to divorce- or was it ?
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What is beginning to emerge is a picture of disaster,
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especially for children and vulnerable women.
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In reviewing the cases, one of the first things that becomes
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apparent is the different legal circumstances under which the
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initial joint custody arrangements were negotiated. In the early
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days, there was little joint custody pressure from the courts
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and, barring highly unusual circumstances, there was little
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maternal fear that failure to go along with joint custody would
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jeopardize a mother's chances to win sole custody or cause the
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court to impose joint custody against her will.
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In many early "successful" cases, parents reported that the
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courts resisted joint custody even when it was vigorously sought
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by both parties. Thus, initial joint custody families were highly
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motivated to make the arrangement work, had made the decision to
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seek joint custody on their own, and demonstrated a history of
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cooperation even in the face of divorce. Many even voluntarily
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pledged to live in the same town until the children finished
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secondary school.
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Clearly, all of the data on which the enthusiastic response
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to joint custody was based - with the exception of the
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relitigation issue - have been traced to these friendly, highly
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motivated, and generally a typical divorcing couples. The fact of
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the matter is that divorce is often fraught with conflict and
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hostility. Many couples are unable to put aside anger and hurt
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and work cooperatively in the interests of the children. Thus the
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adversarial nature of the legal system allows them to channel
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this hostility and anger into legal combat and other settlement
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issues. Rather than encouraging a parental truce, joint custody
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allows them to fuel the adversarial fires with a new and potent
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weapon - the threat of a custody battle.
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MISTAKEN DATA
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Current available data indicate that the early conclusions
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were wrong at least for the typical case. Relitigation rates are
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not lower but higher among families who enter into joint custody
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agreements when there is some clear threat that the courts may
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impose it anyway. The literature also fails to support the
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contention that joint custody will reduce the incidence of
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intraparental postdivorce conflict. Indeed, it appears to do just
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the opposite. Because a large number of divorcing couples
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continue to battle sporadically or continuously after the
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divorce, regular and continuing contact perpetuates the fighting.
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Most negative of a are the direct reports from children in
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joint-physical custody situations which reveal that the constant
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upheaval is far more unsettling and stressful than early reports
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indicated, especially when there are significant distances
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involved, wide discrepancies between quality of life in the two
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households or when there is continuing parental hostility and
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conflict.
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Likewise, for mothers in hostile joint custody situations,
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the demands of single parenting do not seem to have been reduced.
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The parent who assumes the roe of primary caretaker for the
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children now has to contend with less overall control and more
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frequent intrusions.
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Still, joint custody advocates may argue, despite these
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drawbacks, at least fathers' rights have been asserted, and
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children benefit from continued parental involvement. Aside from
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what we might like to believe, however, research shows that the
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overwhelming majority of fathers who sought custody did so for
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revenge or as leverage to obtain better financial settlement
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(i.e., pay less child support) rather than because they had a
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keen interest in parenting.
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Lawyers who allow their clients to turn the divorce process
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into a gladiatorial arena for revenge, exacerbate the problem.
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Likewise, using the courts' predisposition to give custody to the
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most cooperative parent as a tactic that puts an abusive parent
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in an advantageous custody position is unconscionable. Many
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therapists have encountered cases in which these new custody
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guidelines have been used to give sole or joint custody to a
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parent who has been either psychologically or physically abusive
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to the child, spouse, or both. If the parent has not been
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formally arrested and charged with abuse, the court may interpret
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the other parent's unwillingness to cooperate with joint custody
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as an unreasonable response. The nonabusive parent may be forced
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to accept an out-of-court settlement to avoid the possibility of
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losing custody and subjecting the chid to further abuse.
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The Presence of a joint custody option or presumption may
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also have a profound effect on other settlement issues. For
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example, the presumption of parental equality on the issue of
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custody increases the risks associated with custody litigation.
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Therefore, the threat of litigation may be used to persuade the
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mother to settle for less support if she wants to retain custody,
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and the child may actually end up with a lower standard of
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living. Indeed, recent reports indicate to some extent joint
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custody has resulted in an increasing number of children living
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below the poverty level. Therapists report hearing fathers say,
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"If you don't take these conditions we'll go to court, and if we
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do I'll also fight for custody."
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In an idealized world, joint custody looks like the perfect
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solution to a difficult problem. But the reality of the situation
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is that there is no perfect blueprint for divorce. Solutions must
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be tailored to the parties and their problems, and professionals
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who assist divorcing couples must keep the welfare of the
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children in mind and not be limited by the client's pettiness or
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narrow vision.
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********* Read on......
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MEN INTERNATIONAL'S ANSWER TO PROPAGANDA ON JOINT CUSTODY
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Some fanatics in our movement see us as "enemies" of joint
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custody. A subject that does not merit a reply. The above article
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begins on a reasonable premise. There are serious flaws in joint
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custody laws based on the error riddled "California Model".
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Indeed joint custody has often been misapplied, but NOT in
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the manner suggested by this "Family Advocate" from the ABA
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Family Law section. The article rapidly degenerates into
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worthless drivel of political propaganda. The article is riddled
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with statements such as ; "The Literature also fails" , "Some
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Therapists report that", and other anecdotal references. What
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literature ? Which therapists ?
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Most revealing of this article is the obvious intellectual
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bias against equal custody rights for fathers and enforceable
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access rights. The articles offer many conclusory statements not
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one of which is supported by direct reference.
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It is hard to miss the veiled references to the two latest
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screeching feminist diatribes "The Divorce Revolution" by Lenorre
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Weitzman and "Mothers on Trial" by Phyllis Chesler. Her sources
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are obvious as they are fatally flawed. That is one of the
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problems when you quote the "Literature" as opposed to the facts.
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The article offers no solutions. It suggests however that we
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should return to the "maternal presumption" to determine custody
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cases. It decidedly opposes equal footing for fathers. It also
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opposes access by fathers that is enforceable . The article uses
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highly prejudicial conclusions about fathers motives for seeking
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custody. This in the face of a body of work by major universities
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such as Harvard which clearly refutes their convenient
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conclusions .
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The early studies on joint custody were clearly flawed, and
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this criticism has basis. The conclusions that are spiralled off
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of that are highly erroneous.
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Joint custody is no panacea as the fanatic supporters claim
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it to be. But it is hardly the horror the authors of this article
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paint it to be either when you compare it to the alternative they
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suggest ( sole mother custody in ALL cases without practical
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exception). There is an over abundance of evidence on how
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dismally sole mother custody has failed.
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This article is a perfect example of throwing the baby out
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with the bath water. Because the mechanical process for
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implementing joint custody ( keeping both parents in a child's
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life) that does NOT mean that the concept should be abandoned. In
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this case there are solutions that further remove this process
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from the adversarial system into a therapeutic one.
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The article is conceptually flawed in many regards. While
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the "California model" joint custody law is a half-baked
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simplistic solution to a hoary problem, what the authors propose
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is that we return to the neanderthal era. Joint custody has
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failed to live up to the promises made for it, but that hardly
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means that it is the horrendous failure painted in the article.
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Fathers advocates must be wiling to look at these failings
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and make improvements in the environment in which joint custody
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will be implemented. Threats or tactics that misuse joint custody
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to gain financial advantage are inappropriate to the spirit of
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the concept. However, need I point out that under "traditional"
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custody arrangements ( exclusive sole custody to women) that
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there is a much more precisely documented history of horrendous
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abuses including granting custody to mothers who were provable
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homicidal maniacs. The number of children who have been maimed,
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lost their precious little lives, or who have been sent off to
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mental wards across America is far worse per capita than the
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problems we have seen with joint custody.
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Sure, joint custody is a bad solution, but who has a better
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one ? It will have to suffice until legislatures are willing to
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tackle the tough job and junk the adversarial process for divorce
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entirely and those who for profit or political agendas strive to
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turn the clock backward are blown away.
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This article in the summer 1986 issue of "Family Advocate"
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is sheer propaganda from radical feminism and it offers
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absolutely no enlightenment on this important subject. It is
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filled with emotional argumentation and it offers no tangible
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evidence or support for ANY of its conclusions.
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While the authors decry the POTENTIAL abuses by fathers
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under joint custody laws, they ignore how mothers have an
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unrefutable track record of using children as bludgeons to get
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MORE money and of paying "hide-and-seek" with visitation under
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sole mother custody laws. The article leaves much to be desired
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in accuracy on this subject. |