164 lines
5.9 KiB
Plaintext
164 lines
5.9 KiB
Plaintext
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+ +
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+ REAL PIRATES GUIDE VOLUME III V.2 +
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+ -WRITTEN BY THE WHIP- +
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+ +
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The following is a list of what
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pirate is or isn't. In many cases,
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you will find similar experiences in
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your own pirate life. As you see,
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this text is formatted in 40 columns
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which brings us to the first instance
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REAL PIRATES do not care what the
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width of a text was formatted in. They
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can handle anything. Therefore all of
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you 80 column owners, bare with it.
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The Apple II/II+ will be around for
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long time.
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Real pirates realize that piracy
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is not a crime; it is the only
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solution. Real pirates do not get
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paranoid of Sierra On-line's copy
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violation warning: $50,000 fine and/or
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imprisonment.
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Real pirates don't worship hires
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pictures. Real pirates can't afford
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Hayes modem because they know it's not
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worth the money. Real pirates never
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made the mistake of buying a Hayes
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modem. Real pirates don't try to use
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Disk-fer with their Hayes modem. Real
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pirates don't pick 'answer' mode in
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Disk-fer simply because they know they
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they will get their disk first.
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Real pirates can send without
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recieving. (Give without taking.)
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Real pirates don't get I/O errors on
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half their disks. Real pirates don't
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use generic disks. Real pirates don't
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use their apples for testing plant
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growth and temperatures. Real pirates
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don't replace their fish tank with
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"Fishies."
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Real pirates know what they have
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in their library. Real pirates don't
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delete something for everything they
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get. Real pirates don't buy software
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so they can be the first to crack it.
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Real pirates don't waste their
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money on software because they know
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it's not worth it. Real pirates know
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that Pole Position for the Apple will
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never come out. Real pirates don't
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make prank phone calls. Real pirates
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don't advertise their bbs/ae/catsend
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lines without keeping them up. Real
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pirates run a bbs/ae/catsend line 24
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hours a day or they don't run one at
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all. Real pirates have two phone
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lines. Real pirates realize that they
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asked for it when they get a call for
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their bbs/ae/catsend line at the wrong
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time of the day. Real pirates know
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that the South Pole is located in the
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U.S.A.
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Real pirates don't put their name
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and numbers on other pirate's wares.
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Real pirates don't put their friends
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names on a crack just to make
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him/her/it well-known. Real pirates
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not pollute their wares with numerous
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names, groups and numbers.Real pirates
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do not update their whole system and
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collection to Prodos. Real pirates
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never run out of disk space. Real
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pirates don't trade their Apple
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II/II+/IIe in for a IIc. Real pirate
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don't bug other pirates for "new
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wares."
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Real pirates don't freak out when
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they meet a female pirate. Real
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pirates are not conceited. Real
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pirates don't make mommy buy the blank
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disks. Real pirates know how to spell.
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Real pirates don't play Stickybear
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ABC. Real pirates are not racists.
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Real pirates do not hang out on
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homo-sexual based bbs's. Real pirate
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can find in their collection what they
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know they have. Real pirates are not
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in a hurry to collect all of the
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Trillium shit. Real pirates have
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alternate ways of copying Time Zone
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other than by modem. Real pirates
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don't turn a file into a full disk so
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they can slap their tacky title page
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on to it.
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Real pirates don't join groups so
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they can become well-known. Real
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pirates don't need a reason to have
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access to a certain board or bbs. Real
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pirates do not brag to computer
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illiterates that they can break into
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banks, etc. now with their new modem
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when they know they can't. Real
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pirates don't waste their time and
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money driving miles to see other
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pirates. Real pirates do not brag of
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their alcohol/drug use; sexual desire
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and experiences; and or suicide
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attempts.
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Real pirates do not know how many
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disks they have, and do not care to
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hear the notion of how many disks that
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another pirate has. Real pirates don't
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make obnoxious noises, sounds, moans,
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groans, and tones while on a
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conference line. Real pirates don't
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get other pirates in trouble. Real
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pirates don't bill other pirates.
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(Unless he/she/it has done the same to
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you.) Real pirates don't spend their
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life typing in text-files. (Which is
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why this one is almost done.) Real
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pirates do not have to read files like
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this one, they know what they are
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already.
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And finally, Real Pirates are no
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pirates at all; They don't kill for
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their reputation...they earn it.
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-------------------------------------
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Hope you are not offended by anything
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writen in this text file, otherwise it
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your cue to retire pirating, coz real
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pirates are not offended by things
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writen in text files.
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-------------------------------------
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X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X
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Another file downloaded from: NIRVANAnet(tm)
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& the Temple of the Screaming Electron Jeff Hunter 510-935-5845
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Rat Head Ratsnatcher 510-524-3649
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Burn This Flag Zardoz 408-363-9766
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realitycheck Poindexter Fortran 415-567-7043
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Lies Unlimited Mick Freen 415-583-4102
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Specializing in conversations, obscure information, high explosives,
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arcane knowledge, political extremism, diversive sexuality,
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insane speculation, and wild rumours. ALL-TEXT BBS SYSTEMS.
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Full access for first-time callers. We don't want to know who you are,
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where you live, or what your phone number is. We are not Big Brother.
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"Raw Data for Raw Nerves"
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X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X
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