textfiles/humor/COMPUTER/lsd.man

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Article 76 of alt.drugs:
Subject: LSD 4.3
Summary: Better living thru Unix
Message-ID: <2709@bloom-beacon.MIT.EDU>
Date: 1 Feb 88 16:48:13 GMT
Reply-To: dryfoo@athena.mit.edu (Gary L. Dryfoos)
Organization: Massachusetts Institute of Technology
LSD(1) UNIX Programmer's Manual LSD(1)
NAME
lsd - turn off your mind, relax, and float downstream
SYNOPSIS
lsd [ -dsS ] brandname user ...
DESCRIPTION
Disturbs the given users according to dosage, set, and setting.
If more than one user is specified, each will be affected by the
others, according to the arguments they give to lsd on their
own terminals or machines. It is recommended that one of the users
in a group specify a dose of 0, and that at least one other user be
experienced in using lsd.
Brandname is usually a blotter pattern, but may be used to specify
a non-blotter form, such as "windowpane" or "pyramid."
There are a number of options, each of which can have a strange and
not completely predictable effect on the users:
-d Dosage. A dosage of 1 to 3 is recommended for first time
users, although strength varies with brandname and storage
conditions.
-s Set. Recommended values are "calm," "happy," and "groovy."
Sets like "angry," "frustrated," and "bummed" may cause file
system damage, and should be avoided. For these sets, other
utilities are available (see "valium").
-S Setting. Recommended are "familiar," "interesting," and
"comfortable." Hostile and challenging settings are reserved
for experienced users.
FILES
/etc/trips is a log of system-wide use of lsd since booting.
BUGS
When invoked with incorrect arguments, lsd will print out a random,
Unixy-sounding error message and remove this man page. This policy
prevents misuse by undergraduates and fundamentalist Christians.
User state should return to normal in twelve hours or less after
invoking lsd. With extreme parameters, however, this cannot always
be guaranteed.
The output device is assumed to be 80 columns wide.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
I don't know where it came from originally, so Please Use Carefully!
(Remember: Dosage, Set, and SETENV)
______________________________________________________________________________
Gary L. Dryfoos ARPA/Internet: dryfoo@athena.mit.edu
UUCP/Usenet: ...ihnp4!mit-eddie!athena.mit.edu!dryfoo
Phone: (617) 253-0184 / (617) 825-6115
USPS: E40-318, M.I.T., Cambridge, MA 02139
"So, you cannot resist, can you? No, no one can! When LeMott sings,
they dance! Ha-ha-ha! They all dance!"
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