93 lines
3.9 KiB
Plaintext
93 lines
3.9 KiB
Plaintext
<> <>
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<> The First Book <>
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<> Of <>
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<> Computer Phobias,Disorders,and Diseases <>
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<> <>
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Written and Concieved by:The Warriors
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This file is to point out the numerous ailments which strike millions of
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computer losers (I mean users) every year.Bear with us and enjoy!
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Overkill Syndrome: The act of a serious bozo who calls a board at least five
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times a day to check for k-rad mail.Usually these calls
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will be made within a twenty minute period of each other.
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If the patient is not helped,this syndrome can develop
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into another and much worse disorder known as AIDS (see
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below).
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AIDS : Also known as 'Asshole In Despair Syndrome' One inflicted with this
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much more terrible form of Overkill Syndrome will, in the long run, be
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ostracized from society.Most of these poor souls are considered as
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'Losers'.
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Loser : One who talks,types,and acts like a complete and undenied
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asshole.There is no known cure for this horrible disease.There is
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however great experimentation with a cure known as 'Loser Abuse
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Boards'.These seminars are supposed to make the inflicted to admit he
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has a problem.
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Logon Schitzto : One who owns at least four to five aliases on a said
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bulletin board.The inflicted will proceed to trade with
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himself,have 'wars' with himself, and in the case of a
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sysop being inflicted with this disease ,they will chat
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with themselves.This disease is very dangerous to the
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inflicted and also to the fellow users.The only known cure
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is a serious session with an ID editor by a caring sysop.
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To help a sysop inflicted with LS,crash his board until he
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decides to take it down.
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Download Junkie: Otherwise known as a leech.Sysops of Ae's, Cat-furs and
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other of the like know these people all too well.There is no
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cure other than to delete his pass or kill his term that has
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dowload capabilites.
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CCAS Victim : Chat Channel Assholism Syndrome.This disease is at its fullest
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while on a Diversi-Dial or a system like Datanet (215-563-9211)
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or any other system with multi-user chat.Symptoms are as
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follows:
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1. Expresses a feeling of sickness to all other users on the channel.
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2. Believes that you can go voice with other users in the channel.
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3. As a new user, starts to call the resident 'cool dudes' names such as 'You
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butt.', 'I hate you', 'You are an egghead', and others in the same asanine
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behvioral pattern.
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4. Has more than one account on a no time/call limit multi user system.
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5. Has the names, Bill Max, Terminator II
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6. They smell through the fone.
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7. When asked there fone they give it public rather through mail or a Private
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message.
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The afflicted will not be able to be spotted unless logged on to one of the
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above systems.If you have suspicions of someone, get them to log on and see what
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happens.
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This is hardly a conclusion to the saga of disorders, its just I'm bored with
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the topic. Any misspellings? I'm deeply sorry. And I'll try to do better next
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time.
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THE FIFTH PRECINCT
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[502] 245-8270
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---------------------------------------
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Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open
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