58 lines
3.2 KiB
Plaintext
58 lines
3.2 KiB
Plaintext
Subject: sad but true....
|
|
|
|
{ed Looks like this was collected from the various discussions of
|
|
this in comp.misc a long while ago.}
|
|
|
|
Computer Stories from a Field Service Engineer
|
|
---------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
When I worked for a company that had a contract with 3M, 3M had asked me
|
|
to write them a memo describing why we were having problems with diskette
|
|
failures. I said in the memo that the disks were failing due to head
|
|
crashes. "If the customers would just clean their heads periodically, we
|
|
wouldn't have these problems," I said in the memo. One customer responded
|
|
with "What kind of shampoo do you recommend?"
|
|
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
An end-user hotline received a call about a bad software disk. They asked
|
|
the customer to make a copy of the disk and mail it in to the hotline.
|
|
A few days later, they received a letter with a mimeographed copy of
|
|
the disk. Since it was a double-sided disk, both sides of the disk
|
|
had been xeroxed.
|
|
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
A Computer Operator says as she is lifting an RP06 disk pack from the drive:
|
|
"Gee, how much does one of these weigh?"
|
|
Me: "It depends on how much data is on the disk....
|
|
The operator believed it.
|
|
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
I had a similar experience while working as a student operator at
|
|
Michigan Tech. One particularly trying afternoon, the computer was merrily
|
|
crashing for a number of reasons. After about four such spectacles, we
|
|
broadcast that the computer would be down for the remainder of the afternoon.
|
|
There was a resigned groan from the users and they began to file out of the
|
|
Center, except for one comely young woman with wide blue eyes who wandered up
|
|
to the counter and queried:
|
|
"What's wrong with the computer?"
|
|
Too tired and irritated to give her a straight answer, I looked her straight
|
|
in the eye and replied: "Broken muffler belt."
|
|
A look of deep concern wafted into her expression as she asked:
|
|
"Oh, that's bad. Can you call Midas?"
|
|
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
I work for University Computing Services answering questions about any and all
|
|
aspects of computing here, and as a result I run into some truly astonishing
|
|
mental densities... A few excerpts from the Helpdesk:
|
|
Caller: "What's the name for when you're entering data into the computer?"
|
|
HD: "Data Entry."
|
|
Caller: "Thank you!"
|
|
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
Overheard in a student computer lab:
|
|
Client (raising hand and waving frantically): "The computer says 'Enter your
|
|
name and press RETURN.' What do I do??"
|
|
Lab Assistant: "Enter your name and press RETURN."
|
|
Client (as if a revelation has struck): "Oh!"
|
|
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
Another friend of mine in a similar situation reports having a student in the
|
|
lab one day, who had to abort out of the SET PASSWORD sequence because he
|
|
couldn't think of a six-letter word.
|
|
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
--
|