46 lines
1.4 KiB
Plaintext
46 lines
1.4 KiB
Plaintext
The following are "Data Processing Definitions":
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Assumed Decimal Point - Located two positions to the right of
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a programmer's current salary in estimating his own
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worth.
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Bit - The increment by which programmers slowly go mad.
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Chaining - A method of attaching programmers to desks to speed
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up output.
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Checkpoint - The location from which a programmer must forget
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in order to be successful.
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Core Storage - A receptacle for the center section of apples.
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Counter - A device over which martinis are served.
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Disassembler - An unattended five year old child.
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Error - What someone else has made when he disagrees with your
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computer output.
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External Storage - A wastebasket.
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Fixed Word Length - Four-letter words used by programmers in a
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state of confusion.
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Floating Control - A characteristic exhibited when you have to
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go to the restroom but cannot leave the computer.
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Floating Point - The absolute limit before floating control
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is lost.
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Flow Chart - A graphic representation of the fastest route to
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the restroom.
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Input - Food, whiskey, beer, aspirin, etc.
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Macro - The last half of an expression of surprise: "Holy Macro".
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Memory Dump - Amnesia.
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Programmer - A red-eyed, mumbling mammal capable of conversing
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with inanimate objects.
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