85 lines
6.2 KiB
Plaintext
85 lines
6.2 KiB
Plaintext
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-=-=-= Well folks, here we are yet again. That text phile group =-=-=-
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-=-=-= that just keeps coming back. This time however, we have kinda =-=-=-
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-=-=-= decided (assuming that Red okays it) that instead of the same =-=-=-
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-=-=-= ol' bullshit about breaking and entering, blowing-up this and =-=-=-
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-=-=-= that, etc, we are going to bring a little Christmas cheer and =-=-=-
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-=-=-= stray for the SANctuary formula. Even though it is September =-=-=-
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-=-=-= right now, who gives a fuck.Read the phile, smile an' enjoy.. =-=-=-
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:-) (-:
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:-) SANctuary.... (-:
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:-) Originally written by Merv, (-:
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:-) (wherever in hell he got it from, I dunno) (-:
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:-) Edited by Havok Halcyon. (-:
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:-) (-:
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:-) Twas the Night Before Christmas... (-:
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:-) (-:
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:-) Twas the night before Christmas, and God it was neat. (-:
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:-) The kids were both gone, and my wife was in heat. (-:
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:-) The doors were all bolted, the phone off the hook, (-:
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:-) It was time for some nooky, by hook or by crook. (-:
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:-) Mamma in her teddy and I in the nude, (-:
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:-) Had just hit the bedroom and reached for the lube. (-:
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:-) When out on the lawn there arose such a cry, (-:
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:-) That I lost my boner, and Mama went dry. (-:
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:-) Up to the window I sprang like an elf, (-:
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:-) Tore back the shade while she played with herself. (-:
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:-) The moon on the crest of the snowman we'd built, (-:
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:-) Shoved a broom up his ass, clean up to the hilt. (-:
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:-) When what to my wondering eyes should appear, (-:
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:-) But a rusty old sleigh and eight mangy reindeer. (-:
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:-) With a fat little driver, half out of the sled, (-:
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:-) A sock in his ear and a bra on his head. (-:
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:-) Sure as I'm speaking, he was high as a kite, (-:
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:-) And he yelled to his team, but it didn't sound right. (-:
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:-) "Whoa Shithead, whoa Asshole, whoa Stupid, whoa Putz, (-:
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:-) Either slow down this rig or I'll cut off your nuts. (-:
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:-) Look out for the lamp post, and don't hit the tree, (-:
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:-) Quit shaking the sleigh, 'cause I gotta go pee." (-:
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:-) They cleared the old lamp post, the tree got a rub, (-:
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:-) Just as Santa leaned out and threw up on my shrub. (-:
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:-) And then from the roof we heard such a clatter, (-:
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:-) As each little reindeer now emptied his bladder. (-:
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:-) I was donning my jockeys, to cover my ass, (-:
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:-) When down the chimney came Santa with a boom and a crash. (-:
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:-) His suit was all smelly with perfume galore, (-:
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:-) He looked like a bum and he smelled like a whore. (-:
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:-) "That was some brothel," he said with a smile, (-:
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:-) "The reindeer are pooped, so I'll just stay a short while" (-:
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:-) He walked to the kitchen for himself poured a drink, (-:
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:-) Then whipped out his pecker and pissed in the sink. (-:
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:-) I started to laugh, my wife smiled with glee, (-:
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:-) The old boy was hung nearly down to his knee. (-:
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:-) Back in the den, Santa reached in his sack, (-:
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:-) But his toys were all gone, and some new things were packed. (-:
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:-) The first thing he found was a pair of false tits, (-:
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:-) The next was a handgun with a penis that spits. (-:
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:-) A box filled with condoms was Santa's next find, (-:
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:-) And six pair of panties, the edible kind. (-:
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:-) A bra without nipples, a penis extension, (-:
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:-) And several more things I shouldn't even mention. (-:
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:-) A fuck ring, a G-string, and all types of oil, (-:
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:-) And a dildo so long that it lay in a coil. (-:
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:-) "This stuff ain't for kids, Mrs. Santa will shit, (-:
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:-) So I'll leave 'em here, and then I'll just split." (-:
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:-) He filled every stocking and then took his leave, (-:
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:-) With one tiny butt plug stuck under his sleeve. (-:
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:-) He sprang to his sleigh, but his feet were like lead, (-:
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:-) Thus he fell on his ass and broke wind instead. (-:
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:-) In time he was seated, took reigns of his hitch, (-:
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:-) Saying, "Take me home, Rudolf. This night's been a bitch!" (-:
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:-) The sleigh was near gone when we heard Santa shout, (-:
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:-) "The best thing about pussy is you can't wear it out!!" (-:
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:-) (-:
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:-) (-:
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:-) Merry Chanukah (-:
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:-) (I'm Jewish and **I** can't even spell that fregin' word) (-:
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Hellfire Bulletin Board System The Hermitage BBS
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908.495.3926 614.297.0987
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SANctuary World Headquarters SANctuary Dist. Site
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