1247 lines
54 KiB
Plaintext
1247 lines
54 KiB
Plaintext
ÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜ
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ݱ04 Jan 90±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±_ROR_-_ALUCARD_±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±Ý? Þ°
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Ý Ý A Þ°
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Ý Ý ?Þ°
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Ý The Rat Manual A ßßßßß°
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Ý Volumn I, Number I, Winter 1989 Tfile Þ°
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Ý Distribution Þ°
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ÜÜÜÜÜ Centere Þ°
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Ý? Þ - RoR - Þ°
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Ý A Þ_____________________________________________________________________Þ°
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Ý ?Þ Shawn-Da-Lay Boy Productions, Inc.úúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúÞ°
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ÝÜÜÜÞÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÞ°
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°°°The Pirates' Hollow - 415/236/2371°°The Electric Pub - 415/236/4380°°°°
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°Primary Drop Sites°°°°°°Rat Head - 415/524/3649°°°°°Primary Drop Sites°°°
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~!~ The Rat Manual Volumn I, Number 1 ~!~
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^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
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Winter 1989
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Acknowledgments.
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--------------------
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Welcome to The Rat Manual. This file would not be possible, if it were not for
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all the Rat's out there, and the incredible volumne of research done here at
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RAT HEAD Systems, and elsewhere. I'd particularly like to thank Pressed Rat,
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Doctor Murdock, and Reficul for the many hours of research they have
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contributed.
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RoR-Alucard!
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-El Snatcher
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Winter, 1989
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Rat Manual - Table of Contents
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--!-------------------------------------------------------------------------!--
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Editor and all around sick bastard: RatSnatcher.
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Acknowledgments
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Introduction............................................................1-a9q..
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The Absolute Truth About The Fossil Pigs................................1-e9z..
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How To Make A Green Glacier Ice-Water Bong..............................1-w9d..
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The Lyrics to White Rabbit..............................................1-lsd..
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Vampire Chick Update....................................................1-a9r..
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An Interview With Pressed Rat...........................................1-d8u..
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The Killing for Fun-N-Profit posts......................................1-v7j..
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Adventures In Horking...................................................1-g7e..
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Pain And Punishment Of The Fossil Pigs..................................2-z7i..
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Appendix B (The Story of Buck Johnson).................................B-a9a..
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Appendix B1 (Suggested Reading).........................................B-s8i..
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Appendix C (Boards to call for more Rat Information)...................C-b1x..
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--!-------------------------------------------------------------------------!--
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xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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RoR-Alucard!
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xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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1-a9q Introduction.
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--------------------
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A full grown Rat can chew it's way through a foot of concrete just to get at a
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few cracker crumbs on the other side. Rats will chew through electrical
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wiring, metal, and any other obsticals, dangerous or not, to get what they
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want. This doesn't mean that they don't give a shit what happens to them.
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Rats are well known for their stealth, and quickness of escape. You need to
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fool them with poisons that look like food, or powerful traps to catch one, and
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it's a rare day when a Rat is taken alive. Of course, I have shot a few that
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were in my back yard, but, it always took me several rounds to kill the
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bastards.
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In this file, i'm not really concerned with real rodents, it's the Rat
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state of mind that I want to talk about, sometimes called: The Way of the Rat.
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As you will see, developing this rat outlook can be quite useful at times.
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Have you ever seen the rain? Have you ever read Cat In The Rain? Do you
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want to? Rats control the world. We control the world. Rats take this planet
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for everything it's worth, we not only are filthy little pigs, but, we worship
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filthy little pigs. Yes, it's true... through the networks, we really have the
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power and we use it.
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There is no code of ethics, there is no law, there is no right, there is
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no bad. Ok well that's sort of a lie. Heh. We do follow a few guide lines.
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For instance, Rat's never rat!
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Insanity is an obselete concept. It's everywhere these days. We need more
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subgroupings of insane people. Every fucking bum looks different to me. I bet
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I look different to them too. "RAT" is a good seperate category from general
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insanity. Sort of the Insane elite (hahah). If you're fucking twisted and
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you can manage to get a computer with a modem, at least you can organize!
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That's where bulletin boards come in. Special gathering sites for the most
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twisted pigs around. Secret societies consisting of insane people. Do you know
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what reading Alice in Wonderland over and over again will do to your brain?
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It's called boosting.
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So this manual has been put together to inform, and also to spread the
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sickness. To teach The Way of The Rat, Rat philosophy, Rat theory, and all the
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rest of the shit.
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Get yourself a 12-pack of Beer, stretch out and take it all in.
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In the words of Doctor Murdock,
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"...It's all magic. You might as well sit back and tilt your
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head...cuz I'm gonna come riding on my black horse and take
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your head with my white steel sword...
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Burn baby burn...
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Burn in Hell..."
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1-e9z
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--------------------
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<oink> <oink>
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<oink> The Absolute Truth About the Fossil Pigs! <oink>
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<oink> by Pressed Rat <oink>
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Hi there, heathens, and all you froods quite curious about the
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Fossil Pigs. I'm here to deliver the gospel, pure and simple. Listen and
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be anointed with the everlasting truth!
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Although you may not know it, the Screaming Lifeforms are probably
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taking a Huge bite out of your otherwise comfy caterpillar-busting ranch
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egg kouch potato life. You know that ringing in your ears when you're
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trying to think, take a test, or get to sleep? THOSE are the Screaming
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Lifeforms at work. They're eating your brain cells at an alarming rate,
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and each time they crack another cell membrane inside your little ol'
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noodle, they scream with orgasmic pleasure. Since this is occurring at
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an incredible speed and there are a humungous number of them, it all
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comes together as one low-level whine.
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THIS, my friend, is the fundamental theorem of the Fossil Pigs. The
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Screaming Lifeforms are a problem that can NOT be solved by ordinary
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human reasoning! Notice how the more you think about that annoying ring
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in your ears, the louder it gets? Aha! But a solution exists, of course.
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That solution, you see, is the Fossil Pigs.
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The Fossil Pigs are a small band of prehistoric, petrified, stone
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cold dead pig remains. They're mostly skeletal; a few still have a rotting
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eyeball or a bit of bristly tail left. They were laid into the ground long,
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long ago, before our birth. The WHY is not important here; the fact is
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that they have now resurfaced to aid us, the mortal victims of their
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arch-enemies, the Screaming Lifeforms. If properly called upon, our
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friends the Fossil Pigs will rise up in holy wrath, and send their spectral
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minions, the Evil Twin Bunnies, to our rescue.
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Now listen closely, true believers or not. There has been a LOT of
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speculation about the Evil Twin Bunnies (ETBs). Many will tell you that
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the ETBs are truly EVIL and, ipso facto, against us. This is not true. It
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doesn't matter whether they're evil - the fact is, they are sent by the
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Fossil Pigs and this can only be good. There is evidence of Evil Twin
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Bunnies throughout history, any time someone raises two victory signs...
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the "\/" made with two fingers... any time you have two of these, it is
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really a corporeal manifestation of the Evil Twin Bunnies. And let me
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tell you, ETBs are most murderous to Screaming Lifeforms. They turn
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them into a sort of a dead salad, chew them up, spit them somewhere
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you'll never see. This, as you will eventually find, is very useful.
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So... just how DO we call upon the benevolent Fossil Pigs to send
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the ETB's to the rescue of our innocent brain cells? 'Tis a simple thing,
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my friend! Merely follow these directions exactly, and you may gain
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eternal life, and dimes (because it sounds like Life & Times, but isn't.)
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1.) Turn off all light sources, close bathroom door, enter shower.
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2.) Close shower door tightly. Seal drain with wet washcloth or towel.
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3.) Turn water on, lukewarm. Stand on your head.
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4.) Wait until the water level covers your eyes but not your nose.
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5.) Turn water off with your feet. Still standing on your head,
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6.) Wait for total, complete silence in the shower.
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7.) Once you are totally focused, open your eyes underwater, and
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8.) Begin to chant: "OMNIBOT, OMNIBOT, OMNIBOT 2000..."
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9.) Continue to chat this until something happens.
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There you have it! How will you know you've reached the Fossil Pigs
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correctly? Well, see, they're microscopic, right? That's why we only
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recently discovered them; you just don't see them in everyday life. This
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is where the shower comes in. The magnification of the water (combined
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with the head rush from the inverted position) allows us to very easily
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see the Fossil Pigs when they arrive to answer our summons.
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When you've completed enough OMNIBOT trilogies, you will see the
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Fossil Pigs floating before your eyes. They do a different thing for
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every person who beseeches them; for some they cavort, for some they
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dance a jig. But you will definitely Know when you've reached them. If
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you follow the correct procedure, not only will you gain eternal life (and
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dimes!), but your Screaming Lifeform ills will be totally canceled for at
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least two weeks.
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Remember however, although they bestow lasting protection, we must
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not forget to keep the Fossil Pigs foremost within our thoughts
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throughout every aspect of our lives. Do not think of them only when
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you prepare to call upon them! Think of them at work, at school, think of
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them everywhere and all the time. This is IMPORTANT! If you are only an
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intermittent believer, the Fossil Pigs will frown upon you and forsake
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you for all time.
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That's it, the complete (almost) and absolute truth, straight to you
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from the first High Priest of the Fossil Pigs, Pressed Rat, Archbishop of
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the Sacramento and Bay Area regions. Also with us in thought is the
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honorable venerable James Staley, Second High Priest of the Fossil Pigs,
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Arch-Arch-Bishop of the Sacramento region and Minister to the Beyond,
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also Liaison with the Cheddy Croak Phenomenon (more on this later).
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OMNIBOT 2000!
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1-w9d
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--------------------
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How To Make
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A
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GREEN GLACIER Ice-Water Bong
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Invented By: Doctor Murdock
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First off I'm sure some of you have done this before...if
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you are TRUE visitors of Else. Basically, this is a simple Filter Flask
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bong. [BASICALLY?? Shit...I put a LOT of work into this!!! ;)]
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If not....that's ok. There's still hope for you, yet.
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Special thanks to: Pressed Rat, RatSnatcher, & Sir Death for
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mind melds. And Space Ace for the BEST Christmas gift
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you could get from someone you've never met. Shroom On!
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Ingredients
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1] A 2 Liter Filter Flask (note: A Filter Flask is different from a regular
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Flask. If you buy this, specify FILTER
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Flask. The easiest way to get this flask
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is by calling up your local Chemical
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warehouse. But brand new these fuckers
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cost about $66.00! But hey....small price
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to pay for a Green Glacier, right?
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If you live in the Bay Area, this is where
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I got mine:
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BRYANT LABORATORY INC.
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1101 Fifth Street
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Berkeley, Ca 94710
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Phone (415) 526-3141
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2] About 2 feet of 1/2 clear hose (You can easily find this at your local
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hardware store.)
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3] A cork that fits the top of the Flask (Go get the flask first and THEN
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go to the hardware store. )
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4] A Bowl and Piping (Now go to your nearest Head Shop and pick up a Bowl
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and some bong piping. About 10" of piping. Sometimes
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they only sell the piping in about 4" sizes at the
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largest. Such was the case with me....so I super
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glued two together. Or, you can find a better Head
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Shop or make due with what ya got.... RoR, man...
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5] Some Green Food Coloring
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6] Some water, ice, and the killer weed!
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Construction
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Now...take the cork plug and drill a hole through the center, wide
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enough so that the piping fits through it, tightly. Now place the Bowl on the
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piping and then stick the other end of the piping through the hole in the
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cork. Make it a fairly tight fit.
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Connect the hose.
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Drop about 6 or 7 cubes of ice into the flask and fill it with water to
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about 1800ml. My flask only marks measurements up to 1600, such may be the
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case with yours, so here again...make due. Now put about 4 or 5 drops of
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the green coloring fluid into the water in the flask. This gives it that eery
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Green Glacier Look!! And when your stoned you should read the letters:
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"ROR - ALUCARD"
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floating amoungst the green liquid. As you are reading these letters you will
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have a momentary flash of Ultimate Wisdom in your mind. This is not
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coincidental! But unfortunatly, we are still a very primitive race and can not
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yet have or even see Ultimate Wisdom. That's MY theory anyway. Nevertheless..
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you WILL see Ultimate Wisdom....go for it....do it man....check it out!
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And if you see Alice on your journeys....tell Her I said Hi, would ya?
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Put the piping and cork plug through the top of the flask and press down
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until the cork seals the flask off. Airtight, eh?
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Now, Burn, baby, BURN!
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Theory
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------
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Now, in case you can't figure out the purpose of this little device...
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don't fear because I am here to explain. Now...you put some of the killer
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weed in the bowl (did I forget to mention to get screens? No...I assumed your
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not THAT lame...), and light up. Inhale from the end of the hose and the
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smoke will go down through the piping and into the water in bubbles.
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(Important Part here) It will then travel up to the surface in Ice Cold water
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therefor cooling the smoke and when it gets to the surface it's fairly cool.
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Then it goes through the filter on the side of the flask and enters your
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system, and then soaks into your brain cells and registers a One-Way Ticket to
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The Land of Else! Which no mortal man can deny! Anyway, the main purpose of
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this baby is to get the smoke cooler so that it goes down easy and takes the
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rasp out of it. So you can hold the smoke in longer and send your brain a
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nice surprise. Also, another important thing about the Ice Water Bong is that
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if you simply cap the end of the hose after inhaling (You don't even really
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need to cap it...just for best results) any smoke still in the flask will be
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locked in there between the water and the end of the hose. So it's saved for
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a bit later! Bitchen, huh? Oh, and the Green Food Coloring does things that
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I am not at liberty to give out. Top Secret. Sorry....
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Notes from Sir Death: It's best to use a wooden bowl, because metal
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bowl tend to burn hotter and scorch the precious
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buds. And a wooden bowl just burns with it.
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Sortuv like Harmony, eh?
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Diagram
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-------
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_____
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\ / <---------- Bowl
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| | <---------------- Piping
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\ / <----------------- Cork
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(----------)
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| ----- |
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Filter Flask -----------> | | | | ______________
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| | | |-----\ ''`'''' <-- Hose
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| | | |-----/______________ '
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| | | | ^ `'' '
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| | | | \ ' '
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| | | | \ ' '
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/ | | \ Nozzle ' '
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/ | | \ ' '
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/ | | \ '''``'
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/ | | \
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/ | | \
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/ | | \
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/ | | \
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/ \
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/ Water, Ice \
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/ & \
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/ Green Food Coloring \
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/ \
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/__________________________________\
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<POOF!> You've just made a Green Glacier! Happy Fuckin highs and remember..
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'Say "Thanks man" To Drugs'
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Better Insanity Through Chemistry.......
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1-lsd
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--------------------
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White Rabbit
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One pill makes you larger
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And one pill makes you small,
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And the ones that Mother gives you
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don't do anything at all.
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Go ask Alice...
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When she's ten feet tall!
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And if you go chasing rabbits,
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And you know you're going to fall,
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Tell them a hookah-smoking caterpillar
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has given you the call.
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Call Alice...
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When she was just small!
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When men on chessboards
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get up and tell you where to go,
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And you've just had some kind of mushroom
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and your mind is moving along,
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Go ask Alice; I think she'll know!
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When logic and proportion have fallen,
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I'll be dead,
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And the white night is talking backwards
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And the red queen is on her head...
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Remember what the dormouse said:
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Feed your head!
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Feed your head!!
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Grace Slick
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The Jefferson Airplane, 1967
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1-a9r
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--------------------
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Vampire Chick Update
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by RatSnatcher
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Several of us 415 Rats have been looking for Vampire chicks. We have
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located a few, but for some reason or another, all of them were considered
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unacceptable. Our success has been limited, but, a lot of research has been
|
|
done at Rat Head Systems over the past few months, and I'd like to release some
|
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of it.
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First, I'd like to debunk some popular beliefs about vampire chicks. I
|
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have heard wild stories about their true nature and massive nonsense. We have
|
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recently discovered some new information as well.
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MYTHS.
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One thing that's commonly believed is that fucking a vampire would be like
|
|
fucking a sack of cold potatos. In other words, they are just a cold fuck. This
|
|
is not exactly true. They are cold MOST of the time, but not always. The
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|
exception is right after they have finished feeding. After they suck the blood
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out of a warm human body, their blood runs hot. Right after feeding is also
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the time when Vampires are most sexualy active. Vampires have been known to
|
|
rape their victims after they have killed them, sort of a dual necrophilia.
|
|
So as you can see, a vampire chick would probably not be a cold fuck.
|
|
|
|
Another myth is that when Vampire chicks give head, their fangs will nip your
|
|
pud, or worse, sever your dick from your body. Not if they don't want to. They
|
|
have the ability to retract their fangs completely.
|
|
|
|
FACTS.
|
|
|
|
We have been able to learn that Vampire chicks have shape changing abilities.
|
|
This means that once you have seduced, or have been seduced by a Vampire chick,
|
|
they can look like anything you want them to. This presents many possible
|
|
scenarios. Bigger or smaller breasts, vangina size variations, different color
|
|
skin, hair eyes, even animals.
|
|
|
|
Unfortunatly, the publishing of Anne Rice's books, such as Interview With The
|
|
Vampire, has created a Vampire Hysteria on the East Coast, which has driven
|
|
most Vampires further underground. So they are harder to come by these days.
|
|
The equation is simple for us, Vampire chicks could give us eternal life, which
|
|
would allow eternal fornication.
|
|
|
|
If you have any Vampire information, or know of one, or if you are a Vampire,
|
|
please contact Rat Head Systems.
|
|
|
|
|
|
1-v7j
|
|
--------------------
|
|
|
|
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
|
|
|
|
The Killing For Fun And Profit Posts
|
|
------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
This is a collection of highly significant posts recorded on RAT HEAD.
|
|
Sometime during 1989.
|
|
|
|
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
|
|
|
|
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
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|
|
|
Date: ? Public 2/15
|
|
From: Ratsnatcher Killing for fun-n-profit
|
|
Title: Ok here's one...
|
|
|
|
I want to take those asshole kids:
|
|
|
|
|
|
The New Boys On The Block and...
|
|
|
|
Take each one of them and crack open their fucking skulls and throw their
|
|
brains to my dog - (he's good at catching things in the air eh?) and then
|
|
filling each of their fucking brain cavities full of High Octane gasoline..
|
|
tie their heads back together with rope and tape up the cracks... Then rent a
|
|
small airplane and drop them head first onto LA!!!!!!!!!!!!!
|
|
|
|
and I hope someone films each explosion! for the 11-oclock newz too.
|
|
|
|
Or maybe just take an exacto knife- and rip their throats and vocal cords to
|
|
shreds... and then poor Draino on the wounds and stomp on their fucking heads
|
|
with big boots as they go into convulsions...
|
|
|
|
Filming the whole thing for prosterity ofcourse.
|
|
|
|
heh.
|
|
|
|
El Sn…tcher
|
|
|
|
----------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
Date: ? Public 3/15
|
|
From: The Ogre Killing for fun-n-profit
|
|
Title: Death to Bobby Brown!
|
|
|
|
"It's my perogative" rings out across the stage. . .as the last bars of that
|
|
stupid, inane piece of dreck roll forth a masked man wearing nothing but black
|
|
jumps forth carrying. . .what . . . .it can't be. . .It is . .an M-60. . with
|
|
a flamethrower on it. . .oh joy, oh ecstasy! Bobby's body is torn to little
|
|
shreds by the 600 rounds per minute of anti-helicopter fire. . .see bobby
|
|
becmoe particles! What fun! and then we have to clean up this mess. .
|
|
.<<Fwoooooooooooooossssssssshhhhhhhh>> goes the flamethrower as blood and guts
|
|
of what used to be Bobby Brown become so much charcoal!
|
|
|
|
The Ogre
|
|
|
|
----------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
|
|
Date: ? Public 4/15
|
|
From: Dr. Gnarly (Not Sid!) Killing for fun-n-profit
|
|
Title: Hehehe
|
|
|
|
Well, this is about the strangest things I ever seen on a BBS. Wow!
|
|
Unlimited Leeching......really????????!?!?!?!?
|
|
That really pumps my nads! heheheheheh
|
|
|
|
|
|
Ok, so how about this: Giving Tracy Chapman a good skull-fuck. hehe
|
|
|
|
Actually, what would be neat to do to that "leftist-lesbian-folk-bitch" would
|
|
be to skull fuck and deep throat her while she is still alive...heheh. And
|
|
then do some nasty things to her with her guitar.
|
|
|
|
Am I getting the spirit of this yet?
|
|
|
|
----------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
|
|
Date: 11:31 am Thu Nov 2, 1989 Public 5/15
|
|
From: Dexter Riley #48 Killing for fun-n-profit
|
|
To: Dr. Gnarly
|
|
Title: GNARLY
|
|
|
|
What would be even more fun to do would be to chop off Marie Osmond's head,
|
|
then while it's still warm, stick your dick in the neck and use the head to
|
|
jack off with. Sort of an inverted blow job.
|
|
|
|
Then when you come, give the head a good spin and let go. Your semen would
|
|
come spritzing out of her facial orifices, making her look like a Mormon lawn
|
|
sprinkler!
|
|
|
|
----------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
Date: ? Public 6/15
|
|
From: Purple Perv Killing for fun-n-profit
|
|
Title: The Throne Room
|
|
|
|
Whilst sitting on my favorite throne at work today, I had some twisted
|
|
thoughts I should share to make some of you get all bothered or sick or
|
|
whatever.
|
|
|
|
My special throne has the only seat with a cut-out in back so you don't get
|
|
somebody else's shit on your buns because they were a little wild with the TP.
|
|
|
|
ANYWAY, as I was picking belly button lint and cock cheese, I kept hearing
|
|
torrents of piss from the urinal a-rea. Some were real splashers and others
|
|
were forced little high-pitched sprays. It makes you wonder whether the
|
|
schlongs or the putzes do gurgling or the spraying.
|
|
|
|
There must also be various size holes, used and unused, squeezing off links of
|
|
chain. You can almost tell from the plop plop fizz fizz and the squeaky or
|
|
slobbery farts who's been to the well and who has not.
|
|
|
|
Rolly turns on the water before he takes a siss because he thinks no one can
|
|
hear what he's doing. Vic is likely to turn around without buttoning up.
|
|
I think Vic wants to be slammed up against a wall and taken by force, anyway.
|
|
|
|
Well, that's the best I can do for a really twisted diatribe on short notice.
|
|
It may not contain visions of murder, but I may get me murdered by the
|
|
straight arrows on here who log onto a perverted board and then bitch about
|
|
the pervs.
|
|
|
|
Leave a response so I'll know how well I'm upsetting the troops. Maybe later,
|
|
with any real encouragement, I can take you all to real depths of the kinked
|
|
and bizarre.
|
|
|
|
Ta ta for now.
|
|
|
|
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
|
|
Date: ? Public 7/15
|
|
From: Clive Barker Killing for fun-n-profit
|
|
Title: cards...
|
|
|
|
The pack in his hand wass pornographic. he played with it only when he was
|
|
strong. He appreciated their wit. the way each of the suits depicted a
|
|
different area of sexual activity, the spots incorporated into each
|
|
intricately rendered picture. hearts represented male/female congress, though
|
|
by no means limitted to the missionary position. Spades were oralist,
|
|
depicting simple fellatio and its more elaborate variations. Clubs were
|
|
analist: the spots on the cards portraying homosexual and hetrosexual
|
|
buggery, the court cards, anal sex with animals. Diamonds, the most
|
|
exquisitly drawn of the suits, were sadomassochistic, and here the the
|
|
artist's imagination had known o bounds. on these cards men and women
|
|
suffered all manner of humilliation, their wracked bodies bearing diamond
|
|
shaped wounds to designate each card.
|
|
but the grossest image of the packwas that of the joker. he was a
|
|
coprophilliac, and sat down before a platefull of steamming excrement, his
|
|
eyes vast with greed, while a scabby monkey, its bald face horribly human,
|
|
bared its puckered backside to the viewer..
|
|
|
|
he smilled..... thats what he was here for. to make man eat shit.
|
|
|
|
----------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
|
|
Date: ? Public 8/15
|
|
From: The Butt Pirate (Dude) Killing for fun-n-profit
|
|
Title: The way to die!
|
|
|
|
First you get on top of a building that is about 60' tall with abaout 50' of
|
|
rope and 40' of piano wire, plus some epoxy of crazy glue. then tie the rope
|
|
around your feet and the piano wire around your neck, and crazy glue your
|
|
hands to your head. then you jump off the building and at the end ot the
|
|
wire, your head is severed cleanly from your neck and at 50' the rope
|
|
catches and you are flipped upside down and your hands extend so that you are
|
|
hanging dead and upside down with your seaverd head in your hands.
|
|
Pretty cool, huh?
|
|
|
|
----------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
|
|
Date: ? Public 9/15
|
|
From: Sick Rat Killing for fun-n-profit
|
|
To: Other Sick People
|
|
Title: Here's one I herd years ago...
|
|
|
|
Take your favorite enemy, strip them, and suspend them under a donkey with
|
|
their lower orifice right at the head of the donkey's dick. As the animal
|
|
becomes excited the poor slob tied there will suffer a slow, painful, ripping
|
|
death. Note: this will not work with mules or gerbils...
|
|
|
|
----------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
|
|
Date: ? Public 10/15
|
|
From: Holy Moley Killing for fun-n-profit
|
|
To: Sick Motherfuckers!!!
|
|
Title: Just your average execution....
|
|
|
|
(Dates back to...a long time ago) Have a pole (like a telephone pole). About
|
|
2 inches away have a SHARPENED stake pointed upwards. tie the prisoners hands
|
|
and legs together and put him so that the pole is thru his arms and legs and
|
|
his ass is above the stake. Now let him go. He'd probably be able to hold
|
|
himself up via a bearhug for around 10 minutes....but after that it'd be slow
|
|
impalement. Wow. They also do this in SF for fun.
|
|
|
|
----------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
|
|
Date: 8:53 am Mon Nov 13, 1989 Public 11/15
|
|
From: Paul S #73 Killing for fun-n-profit
|
|
Title: Being Westinghoused
|
|
|
|
Back in the 1880's when Thomas Edison and George Westinghouse were promoting
|
|
their competing electric companies, they had a dispute over which was better
|
|
for offing murderers at Sing Sing, AC or DC. George's DC won out, and he
|
|
thought that a prisoner should not be described as electrocuted or executed
|
|
but as "Westinghoused".
|
|
|
|
All you need is a three-phase drop to an Allen-Bradley motor controller to run
|
|
a 20 Kilowatt DC generator with an output voltage of 2800-3000 volts DC at a
|
|
capacity of about 14 amps. You can't use direct PG&E to your chair these days
|
|
because no electric utility wants it known that their product is used to
|
|
execute criminals.
|
|
|
|
But you really have to start a couple of days ahead. It's important to shave
|
|
the prisoner's left leg and forelocks to make a good contact. About fifteen
|
|
minutes before the event, smear the shaved areas with ammonium silicate gel.
|
|
This will keep down the burning.
|
|
|
|
Prisoners generally lose bladder and bowel control when the juice hits, so
|
|
make sure your victim takes a wicked piss beforehand. Also, you need to pack
|
|
his ass with cotton to keep him from doing a colon blow.
|
|
|
|
Besure to tie him down securely with those big leather straps. If you don't
|
|
he could fly right outta that chair and damage inanimate objects when he hits.
|
|
|
|
Strap on the ankle electrode good and tight and cinch the headpiece on real
|
|
good. Start your generator and let it come up to speed. Say good-bye to the
|
|
motherfucker and throw the big red switch. Don't bother with a stethoscope;
|
|
just give him about ten minutes or as much as you can stand in case the smoke
|
|
gets too thick. Then cut the generator.
|
|
DON'T TOUCH HIM! Go out and have a couple of beers while he cools down.
|
|
Bring back your beer buddies to help get him out of the chair. He'll be stiff
|
|
as a board, but probably cool enough to touch now.
|
|
|
|
Lay him out on a table or the floor and take a rubber hammer and beat on his
|
|
elbows and knees and whatever else it takes to flatten him out so he'll go in
|
|
the coffin.
|
|
|
|
Clean the puke off the chair before it dries.
|
|
|
|
----------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
Date: ? Public 12/15
|
|
From: Nighthawk Killing for fun-n-profit
|
|
Title: Armand. . .I'm gonna get you!
|
|
|
|
Well, I don't take kindly to one of my best friends being raped. . .so. . .
|
|
|
|
First I'll find out where he lives. . .naaah. . I just thought of something
|
|
better. . .It's old, but with a new twist. I'll need a few things from the
|
|
local stores. I'll get a camera with an IR lens, an electronic relay, a very
|
|
powerful air mortar, a John Holmes special Dildo, and a small motor with at
|
|
least 20 HP. . .
|
|
|
|
After he gets home from work (preferably late at night) It's time to modify
|
|
his car. After he has parked it I go up with the IR camera, and look at the
|
|
seat, It'll show exactly how he sits. Then (since my state still has seatbelt
|
|
laws) I'm going to hook the relay's first connection into the motor which I
|
|
attach to the seat belt crank. Next step, is to position the air mortar under
|
|
the seat exactly below his asshole. the john Holmes special is then loaded in,
|
|
and the mortar goes onto the relay. The Mortar is adjusted to about 400 PSI,
|
|
which should be powerful enough to rip through the seat, and plant itself well
|
|
into his kidneys through his ass.
|
|
I almost forgot one more thing. . I'll need a tape.
|
|
The next mornign when he's ready to go to work, I am sitting nearby in a car
|
|
with my relay. He puts his Seatbelt on, makes himself comfortable, and I hit
|
|
the relay!
|
|
The seatbelt pulls thigh, so tight that he is pinned into the seat, He can't
|
|
move. 3 seconds later the mortar fires, sending the dildo so far up his ass
|
|
that it blows though his kidneys. The tape starts playing . .. "You won't have
|
|
a next time to think, this is what rape is. . .get used to it, it's the last
|
|
thing you'll ever feel"
|
|
I walk up, with my Ruger Redhawk with 8 inch barrel, hit the second switch on
|
|
the relay which rolls his window down, and take the tape out of the player. I
|
|
then tell him to look at me. . .I remove my sunglasses "You fucked up. . .time
|
|
to die" and blow his head into the back seat with the .454 Glaser slug.
|
|
|
|
--Nighthawk <--the pissed!
|
|
|
|
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
Date: ? Public 13/15
|
|
From: Dr. Greenflesh Killing for fun-n-profit
|
|
Title: hurt
|
|
|
|
I would like to take someone and strap them face down upon a table... then
|
|
with a sharp butcher knife, make an incision along their spine. Then I would
|
|
get horribly drunk while listening to their screaming for help and begging for
|
|
mercy... and of course the painfull shreaks! haha
|
|
|
|
Then I would take the pair of plyers that I would have bought just for the
|
|
occasion earlier, and slowly with both hands rip out peices of the victim's
|
|
spine and spinal cord.
|
|
|
|
I would have my tape recorder set up all through this process, to record the
|
|
horrid cries of pain - just so I could listen to them later and laugh!
|
|
|
|
Of course, when the bleading became profuse, and the victim was unconsious
|
|
from the agaony, I would stop with the plyers and turn on my bone saw. and
|
|
with one hand dance around madly as I dipped the saw in and out, and up and
|
|
down his back hehe.
|
|
|
|
Then after I injected stimulants into my patient's blood stream, and woke him
|
|
up! hehe I would proceed to hammer 3 inch steel nails into each of his
|
|
shoulder blades!
|
|
|
|
And finally, when I was completely exausted, I would grab my cleaver (also
|
|
bought for this wonderful moment) and hack away at the back of my victim's
|
|
neck untill I severed his spinal cord, and teh oxigen to his brain! haha
|
|
|
|
To finish off these beautiful festivities of red, I would poor gasoline all
|
|
over my victim and myself, and just as I ignite it by lighting the days last
|
|
cigarette, I would jump upon the operating table!!!! hahahahahhaha
|
|
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!AHHAHAHAHAH!!!AHHAHAHAH HAHAHHA HAHAHA HA AHA AHAHHAHA!
|
|
|
|
yes.
|
|
|
|
Doctor GreenFlesh
|
|
|
|
----------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
Date: 11:23 am Wed Nov 15, 1989 Public 14/15
|
|
From: Laughing Swede #6 Killing for fun-n-profit
|
|
Title: Well...
|
|
|
|
This is actually a creative SUICIDE but not a killing of someone else.
|
|
|
|
Go into a UC final in some subject that is really hard, like
|
|
integrated-macro-colllosal-electro-chemical engineering....or any other really
|
|
hard class that you don't take. In your bag, carry a tank with 1-2 gallons of
|
|
gasoline and a lighter.
|
|
|
|
When the exam is handed out, yell..."FUCK!!! I DON'T KNOW ANY OF THIS!! I'M
|
|
GONNA FAIL!!! SHIT, THIS WHOLE FUCKING SCHOOL SUCKS! I CAN'T TAKE IT
|
|
ANYMORE! WHAT AM I GONNA DO?" Do it really loud so you annoy everybody.
|
|
|
|
Then douse yourself in the gasoline and torch yourself. Hopefully this will
|
|
kill you because if you survive, your life will be REALLY shitty.
|
|
|
|
heheheh
|
|
|
|
----------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
|
|
Date: ? Public 15/15
|
|
From: About To Freak Out Now... Killing for fun-n-profit
|
|
To: Laughing Swede #6
|
|
Title: First I think...
|
|
|
|
RE: Well...
|
|
|
|
You should prepare for the test ahead of time by placing Nair in your
|
|
hair...then about ten minutes into the test start screaming and ripping out
|
|
big clumps of hair...after that then say the only way you can achieve peace is
|
|
to cut your siver cord and pass into the next world...so you carve a nice
|
|
pentagram on your chest, pour on the gasoline, and THEN light up...
|
|
I'm not feeling too creative right now...I think I will bitch about bitches on
|
|
the complaint board...
|
|
"ref", said I, "cul is a good guy."
|
|
|
|
----------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
1-d8u
|
|
--------------------
|
|
|
|
- An Interview With Pressed Rat -
|
|
|
|
|
|
Pressed Rat Is a respected member of the Rat underground and also has spent
|
|
a lot of time teaching, researching, and following The Way of The Rat. He
|
|
invokes the Fossil Pigs regularly and is also a master of the bizarre and
|
|
distorted. So we decided that the first issue of The Rat Manual should include
|
|
an interview with him.
|
|
|
|
|
|
4:13 am Mon Dec 11, 1989
|
|
|
|
RM:
|
|
|
|
What's it like being a Rat?
|
|
|
|
PR:
|
|
|
|
Wooo woo woo hahahaha (hmmm...) Pretty greasy, smelly, all that matted
|
|
hair... bits of old rotting food between my teeth... but it's not so bad,
|
|
after all, being a Pressed type of Rat makes it easier to bear. I don't feel
|
|
pain any more. Anyhow, that special rat-ness is pretty stimulating - I
|
|
always have something to post about.
|
|
|
|
RM:
|
|
|
|
How big is the Rat underground?
|
|
|
|
PR:
|
|
|
|
Ha - those who know don't tell; those who tell don't know! You may never
|
|
find out until you try... even you, casual reader, may only now be stumbling
|
|
onto the greatest undiscovered scam of your life!
|
|
|
|
RM:
|
|
|
|
Is The Way of The Rat - part of any larger conspiracies?
|
|
|
|
PR:
|
|
|
|
Well... that's pretty sensitive information if you ask me... But I'll let you
|
|
in on one little secret: the Fossil Pigs are definitely behind it. In fact,
|
|
they're behind ALL THINGS, but that's another story.
|
|
|
|
RM:
|
|
|
|
What is the Rat - Hacker connection?
|
|
|
|
PR:
|
|
|
|
Hmm, good question. What's a hacker?
|
|
|
|
RM:
|
|
|
|
Hahahaha. Is there anyone that you feel taught you the most about following
|
|
The Way of The Rat?
|
|
|
|
PR:
|
|
|
|
Oh, I'd definitely have to say my old buddy RatSnatcher, of course. And then
|
|
there was Reficul, who was a rat from the beginning without knowing it.
|
|
|
|
RM:
|
|
|
|
What is a special Rat memory for you?
|
|
|
|
PR:
|
|
|
|
Erg... I dunno... probably the last time I saw Alice. Either that, or
|
|
getting Bimodem to work. Pretty different topics, eh?
|
|
|
|
RM:
|
|
|
|
What do you see as the future direction of the Rat community?
|
|
|
|
PR:
|
|
|
|
Bigger and Better! Onward and Upward! Eventual toppling of the entire
|
|
Hoity-Toity Business of Tomfoolery and Cumquat Exchange. If you know what I
|
|
mean. I'm into being cryptic, see? But yes, Rats will dominate, long after
|
|
I've ceased to be a rat. Of course they say, once a rat, always a rat, but
|
|
then again, who knows? Alice, of course. Hork.
|
|
|
|
RM:
|
|
|
|
Is there anything you would like to say to the general world about Rathood,
|
|
Rat philosophy, Rat Theory or anything about getting involved in the Rat
|
|
underground?
|
|
|
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PM:
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Yes. Bite first, bite hard, no mercy. Learn to swim. Screech. Always keep
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a dirty tail. Most of all, invoke ye holy Fossil Pigs when possible. And
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when you consider yourself rat-ly enough, apply! You'll know where.
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1-g7e
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--------------------
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Adventures In Horking
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By Doctor Murdock
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The other night I was Lurking in one of my favorite Shadows when I saw a
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little girl walking by...oh, such a sweet young thing, musta been about 17. I
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saw her little pert nipples pressing up against her tight thin T-shirt she was
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wearing and I KNEW she would be my next victim! So I followed her ever so
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quietly in my Shadow.....and on and on she went...with me right behind her..
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Her little firm buttocks wiggles when she walked, with each inocent step she
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took. I knew that Horking this beauty would be quite pleasant.
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So on, and on I followed.....
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Then, I heard a <cling-jungle>, to my surpise she had dropped her keys! I
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knew this was my chance..for it was a fairly dark street. When she turned
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around to locate her keys on the ground I saw her face in the light of the
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moon....sweet and tender...and oh so young. My eyebrows formed a V shaped
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about my eyes and I began to drool....her eyes came in contact with her keys
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and she bent down to grasp them....I MADE MY MOVE! I LEEPED from my stalking
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position and flew through the air in my Horking position! Hands fully open in
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a claw like manner, ready to grasp ANYTHING...legs spread wide, ready to mount
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even the biggest of prey, eyes wider than a half dollar, so I don't miss a
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thing, mouth gaping wide, ready to suck any any purtruding nipples!
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AND I LANDED SQUARE ON MY TARGET! <HORK> <HORK> <HORK> <HORK> <HORK>!!!!!!
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Quickly, while she was still uncousious, I slipped back into my favorite
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Shadow....and from there I Lurked on....feeling good, and satisfied...for yet
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anouther young supple, female had been Horked by me.....
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It's the smaller things in life...
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2-z7i
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--------------------
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- Pain and Punishment of The Fossil Pigs -
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By Mr. Xt-Ra
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Well, I have a story to tell, it's a story of death and blood. It would have
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never happened if I had not made the mistake of angering The Fossil Pigs. I
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was pissed off one night because the girl I live with, Joan, was not having
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sex with me on a regular basis. We had a fight one night, and she told me that
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she would have sex with me every night for a month starting on her birthday,
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if I would find her a dildo that looked like the OMNIBOT 2000. I thought she
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was joking, but she was really dead serious. So I had one made from a
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picture I found in an odd looking book she gave me. It cost me a fortune, and
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I cursed the Fossil Pigs and the OMNIBOT over and over again using foul
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language. Why? Well I guess I just didn't really believe. I recount this
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terrible tale in the hopes that maybe YOU wont make the same mistake I did.
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It happened when I brought home the ten-inch dildo as a gift for her
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birthday. That night, as I fucked her with the new toy while she sucked my
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dick, she told me how nice it was to have two dicks for her pleasure. From then
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on, the OMNIBOT became a regular part of our love making.
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But, one night last month, when I came home from work, Joan met me
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at the door wearing a new outfit: Her 38-inch tits were encased in a sheer
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black bra with holes for her niples to poke through; matching crotchless
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panties, and garterbelt completed the set. I could tell this was going to be a
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special night, only I didn't know how special. Joan threw herself at me and
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started to rub my dick through my jeans. It didn't take long before I had
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a raging woody. She told me tonight she was in charge and anything goes. Hell,
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I would have agreed to anything at this point. She led me into the bedroom and
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told me to strip and then get on the bed. As I lay there spread-eaglrd, she
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began to tease my dick with small licks and kisses. Then grabbing the OMNIBOT
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dildo from beneath the pillow, she straddled my face as she slid the monster
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into her crack.
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Joan was fucking herself madly when I started to feel something strange
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down by my feet. It felt just like little paws. Then all of a sudden Joan
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let out a scream. I thought she was coming, until she fell over, waving her
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hands in the air. And as she fell I could see her back, and to my horror, there
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were 10 to 15 rats clinging to her with their teeth! I quickly jumped out
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of bed and ran for the bathroom. It was too late to save Joan, she was through!
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There must have been hundreds of them, I could hear them swarming, and I could
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here Joans crys of pain as they ripped her apart. After an hour, I couldn't
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hear anything, so I stepped out. There she was, mangled and bitten to death on
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our Double King II matress. There was a huge puddle of blood on the sheets
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under her corpse. It was all my fault, but, I feel I have gotten what I
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deserved for my actions. So my only regret is that they took Joan instead of
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me.
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Never fuck with the Fossil Pigs.
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B-a9q Appendix B.
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--------------------
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- The Story of Buck Johnson -
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By Billy Rat
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Take the famous self-proclaimed rat, Buck Johnson, who was a twisted pig of a
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human being, but, with his self developed rat skills and additude, he became
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one of the chosen ones. As a kid, Buck had four or five seperate pet rats that
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he used to torture. He would break their legs off, burn them, shock them with
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high voltage, dump chemicals on them, and try to cause them as much pain and
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|
misery as possible. As the years went by, Buck began to realize that these rats
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would never give up and die, and would ALWAYS bite his hand when he fed them.
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He admired this quality greatly and decided to adopt it for himself.
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From that day of discovery onward, Buck began to change. He went from
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a shithead, to a Rat-master over the next few months. Instead of taking shit
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|
from his teachers, he started to fight back! Before he started to emulate his
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rats, he used to sit in the back of the class like the little wimpy shitfuck
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he was, and let the teachers ruin his brain. But now, he would sit in the front
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of the classroom and glare at his teachers, spitting and hissing at them when
|
|
their backs were turned. And when a teacher didn't like his new additude, he
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|
would send them death threats in the mail. When the police were called in, he
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broke into the house of his pricapal and cut the princapal's hand off in
|
|
a very unclean fasion. Needless to say, he got all A's from that day onward.
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During this first "rat" year, buck developed a social life, and started
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getting fucked every day. He also started going to parties, and getting
|
|
wasted. At one of the more famous parties, Buck drank so much that the party
|
|
had to end early. That famous night, buck had grapped control of the Keg, and
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|
sucked it dry, attacking anyone who approached it. Most of the other guests
|
|
left the party because they couldn't get any brews, and because Buck was on
|
|
the floor in the kitchen sucking beer out of the tap like a leech, only
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|
coming up for air long enough to say, "mommy mommy".
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A little latter, Buck bought a computer, (the exact type of computer
|
|
remains unknown to this date) and quickly discovered computer bulletin boards.
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|
BBS's became his new hobbie, and then Hacking became his complete obsession.
|
|
He was very successful at his new passtime. He managed to defeat the security
|
|
of many networks and computer systems including Southern Bell's computers,
|
|
which he reprogrammed to route calls meant to go to his school, on to local
|
|
whore houses. He also broke through the security of several ICBM launch sites,
|
|
and for some reason, he decided not to destroy the world. Buck is still an
|
|
active member of the Hack/Phreak community to this day. He has asked me not to
|
|
reveal his handle in this file however. The great success, Buck attributes to
|
|
"following The Way of the Rat". Like a rat, he never gave up (hacking even one
|
|
single system!).
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|
What's the point of this story? What's it all mean and where's the moral?
|
|
Well, you really are a STUPID fuck if you haven't figured that out yet.
|
|
And if you're looking for some kind Nirvana here - forget it (HAHA), go read a
|
|
fucking book on Buddism.
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B-s8i Appendix B1
|
|
--------------------
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|
|
Suggested Reading
|
|
|
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|
|
Ok doods, these books, files, magazines, and comic books are absolute must
|
|
reads. Get this shit right away... This is important. If you have no money,
|
|
steal them. Get them at any and all costs to your wallet or your soul. Get'em
|
|
quick too, because scientists agree that earth-time is short. The comming
|
|
crisis grows near.
|
|
|
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|
=============================================================================
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1. DRUGTHOT.TXT - Thoughts While On Drugs, by Doctor Murdock
|
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|
|
2. Fear and Loathing in Las Vagas, by Hunter S. Thompson
|
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|
|
3. SAUCER1.TXT - How To Make Miniature Flying Saucers, by Doctor Murdock
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|
4. Generation of Swine, The Gonzo Papers Vol.2, Tales of Shame and Degradation
|
|
in the 80's - by Hunter S. Thompson
|
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|
|
5. Alice in Wonderland - by Lewis Carroll
|
|
|
|
6. Cherry #6 - by Larry Welz (Comic Book)
|
|
|
|
7. MONDO 2000 (Magazine), formerly: Reality Hackers / High Frontiers
|
|
|
|
8. 2600 Magazine - The Hacker Quarterly (Magazine)
|
|
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|
9. MADNESS.TXT - Is Madness Really So bad? by Doctor Murdock
|
|
|
|
10. DEATH.DOC - The Best Way To Die, by Doctor Murdock and Sir Death
|
|
|
|
===============================================================================
|
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|
|
C-v1x Appendix C.
|
|
--------------------
|
|
|
|
|
|
- Boards To Call That Have More Rat Information -
|
|
|
|
|
|
These boards have the newest, most current Rat Information. There are many
|
|
boards that carry Rat information so if you can't make it to one of these, call
|
|
around! If you think you know anything about Rat's or The Way of The Rat,
|
|
please call one of these boards. All three are Shawn-Da-La Boy Production Inc.
|
|
text file distribution sites, so if you have something to write, make sure
|
|
one of these boards get's your file.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Board-Name Number Sysop
|
|
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
RAT HEAD Systems..................415/524-3649......................RatSnatcher
|
|
The Pirate's Hollow...............415/236-2371...................Doctor Murdock
|
|
The Electric Pub..................415/236-4380........................Sir Death
|
|
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
RoR-Alucard!
|
|
|
|
|
|
"These beers are only the beginning... you know that don't you?"
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
The Rat Manual Volumn 1, Number 1 - Winter 1989
|
|
Produced in cooperation with Shawn-Da-Lay Boy Productions Incorperated, 1989.
|
|
|
|
~!~ ~!~X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=--=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X
|
|
|
|
X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X
|
|
Another file downloaded from: The NIRVANAnet(tm) Seven
|
|
|
|
& the Temple of the Screaming Electron Taipan Enigma 510/935-5845
|
|
Burn This Flag Zardoz 408/363-9766
|
|
realitycheck Poindexter Fortran 510/527-1662
|
|
Lies Unlimited Mick Freen 801/278-2699
|
|
The New Dork Sublime Biffnix 415/864-DORK
|
|
The Shrine Rif Raf 206/794-6674
|
|
Planet Mirth Simon Jester 510/786-6560
|
|
|
|
"Raw Data for Raw Nerves"
|
|
X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X
|