87 lines
5.1 KiB
Plaintext
87 lines
5.1 KiB
Plaintext
Õ029ÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ029¸
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³úúúÄ ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ p h o n e l o s e r s o f a m e r i c a ÄÄÄÄÄ Ä úú³
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³ Present ³
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³ Getting The Pay Channels For Phree - By )r. )r<> ³
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ÆÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ͵
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³ Written On April 25, 1995 ³
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ÆÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ͵
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³ For Informational Purposes Only. We're Not Responsible For Your Stupidity. ³
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Ô029ÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ029¾
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You know what I can't stand? It's when you have absoPHREAKINGlutely nothing
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to do. That's where TCI or your cable company comes in. Are you tired of
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BASIC service? Well go ahead and read on......
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First of all, take note of what channels you DON'T have. Try some like HBO,
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Cinemax, Showtime, Disney?, Encore, Movie Channel, etc., etc. These come in
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handy when you finally get them. Next, it is very important you do this when
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no one is outside, otherwise the entire plan will be ruined.
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Go outside. Find where you cable relay is. Not the one on your house, dork,
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but the one in your alley, telephone poll, backyard, frontyard, or near your
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house. The BOX type cable relay is usually green or gray. These are the
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easiest to break into. What you need is a hammer and a point (optional). What
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really works good is a geologist hammer. Anyways, enough on the history of
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hammers, hell just find a way to break the piss-ant lock on the cable box.
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Once you get the lock off (tough huh?) take a look at the cable relay. There
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is sometimes more than one cable line into the box. This is probably your
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neighbors cable. Find the one in the box that is on your side. Confusing?
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Here let me show you.
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ffffffffffff
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f /\ /-\ f f = frame of cable box
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f () | () | f | = Cable line
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f () | () | f () = Metallic tubes that block out channels
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f | | | | f g = Ground
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f | | | | f
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f | | | | f
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f | | | | f
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f | | | | |
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gggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg
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/^\ /^\
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<-Your house--- / \ --Neighbors house-->
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Ok James Bond, your operation is to remove the little silver looking tubes.
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These tubes block out channels like HBO and Showtime. Take off one of the
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little tubes. Close the box, go inside, turn on your T.V and flip through
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the pay channels to see which channels the Lucky Charm Elf left you. Ok, you
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keep removing them until you have every single pay channel imaginable.
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There is one problem with this plan, next time the cable man comes by and
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sees you have been ripping off over $50 worth the pay channels every month,
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he is going to be pretty pissed off. So he'll be thinking,"I'm gonna get them
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goddamned thieves!" He'll probably disconnect you cable. Just think about
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it. "Uhhh ohhhhh! this will be REEEEAAAALLLL HARD to reconnect." Just go out
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to the cable box and reconnect the disconnected wires. One way to get around
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this is to give everybody in your neighborhood free pay channels, that way
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he can't convict the culprit. If you keep doing this every month w/o being
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caught then you got it made. Otherwise they will permanently disconnect your
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cable and take you to small claims court for every dollar worth of cable
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you stole.
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For you pissholes whose cable relay is on a telephone pole, you are going
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to have to steal some pole climbing shoes or get one long fucking ladder. This
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gets to be a real bitch. Just find the cable wires leading into your house.
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Take ALL of the tubes off since you are sort-of in a hurry. Take your ladder
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down and go inside, make a glass of ice-tea and enjoy the cable.
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Since it is late at night, there will probably be some tit movies on Showtime
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or Cinemax. Make sure you record them with your stolen VCR from Best Buy. You
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can later sell these tapes to horny Indians at school like Raj, Rajan, Hashiv,
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Tubah, Crewntol, and Bustav. See, not only do you get $50 worth of free cable,
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but can make $10-$20 off of movies too. See? Being bored can be fun!
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ÕÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍContactÍTheÍPhoneÍLosersÍOfÍAmericaÍNearestÍYou!ÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ͸
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³ Voice: ³ Data: ³
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³ 512-370-4680 PLA Voicemail System ³ 618-797-2339 PLA BBS Illinois Line ³
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ÆÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ͵ 512-883-7543 PLA BBS Texas Line ³
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³ U.S. Mailing Address: ³ 512-851-8317 Sonic Youth Systems ³
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³ Phone Losers Of America ÆÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ͵
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³ P.O. Box 3642 ³ FTP Site: FTP.FC.NET ³
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³ Corpus Christi, TX 78463 ³ directory pub\deadkat\incoming\PLA ³
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³ ³ (Thanks to Disorder & Deadkat!) ³
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ÔÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÏÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ;
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