169 lines
10 KiB
Plaintext
169 lines
10 KiB
Plaintext
Newsgroups: alt.drugs.psychedelics
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This is a revised, detailed account of something some of you may have
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read before. Let me know if any of it hits home in your experience.
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Feel free to distribute/publish whatever, as long as it is left intact.
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the following words are as true as any I am capable of writing. The reader
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will take caution to remember that these are still metaphors, a pale
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gloss on what really occurred.
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With that in mind, here is the greatest true story I can muster:
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After reading the ARCHAIC REVIVAL, I was immediately impressed by Terrence
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McKenna and his incredible ideas, which to me rang so true. I
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rapidly sought out his other works, and THE INVISIBLE LANDSCAPE struck
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me as the most important. For those who have not read it, it is a
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description of an incredible "transcendental errand" performed by
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Terrence and his brother Dennis. The book also attempts to explain, in
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readable language, the mechanics behind their transdimensional doings.
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The basic premise of the experiment was that the brain is really a sort
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of tuning device capable of focusing on any information anywhere in the
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holographic universe. Certain molecular vibrations (namely psilocybin
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when combined with mao-inhibitors) allow the brain to discover
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information which is normally masked. Read this book, my description is
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woefully inadequate. Anyhow, I was interested enough to naively dabble in
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these realms myself.
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The McKenna experiment involved high doses of fresh, Amazonian specimens
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of Stropharia cubensis and an ayahuasca preparation. I decided not to
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deal with any MAO-inhibitors, but I did have a supply of nice Psilocybe
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cyanescens, which is by weight more potent than the common
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cubensis. I ate six grams of dried cyanescens. The setting was a dark
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house on the Chesapeake Bay, in the middle of a February snowstorm.
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The fire cackled as I awaited results. Within minutes of ingesting the
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mushrooms, I felt the first intimations of what was to come, huge waves
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of psychedelic energy manifesting themselves as "wind" flowing through my
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body. I vomited violently, and retreated to the nearly pitch-black bedroom
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to lie down. My companion in the experiment claimed "I'm scared!" and my
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own teeth started to vibrate horribly, in conjunction with the "wind"
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described above. A horrendous, joyous, and absolutely unbelievable set of
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events followed.
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The following events (to paraphrase FB Lamb in WIZARD OF THE UPPER
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AMAZON) are metaphor, it has taken me about 2 years to produce this
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reconstruction of what occurred on that fateful eve.
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I thought I was dead. I knew I had done it to myself, but could not
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for the life of me remember what I had taken, why I was dead, or how it
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happened. I simply knew that I had done it, and I was somehow in a
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galactic prison, or a purgatory perhaps. The visions were plentiful, yet
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solemn. At this point they were mostly in black and white. I could feel
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my ego being physically crushed, just like a can still full of liquid.
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As the pressure increased, the contents pushed "outward". Eventually
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this culminated in some sort of squashed feeling which I can only relate to
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the poor 2-D creatures of the sci-fi classic FLATLAND. I spent some time
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in this suffering, progressively more terrifying state.
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Eventually an entity came and delivered me unbidden personal
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attention. I was quite relieved to see another creature, for I suspected
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I was one myself (although not sure). At first I was captivated by its fluid
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motions and methodical actions. It was moving in rythyms, doing a dance
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of sorts. Eventually it occurred to me that the "dance" it was doing
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involved horrifying probes of my own form, and that it was moving faster
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than I could comprehend while doing so. I was paralyzed. I wasn't sure
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if I had a body or not, but this thing was doing something to ME, which
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was still intact. As I concentrated more and more upon its "physical"
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form (which is a term I use as loosely as possible), it occurred to me
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that it looked somewhat familiar. Not anything I had ever seen, but
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close. It was a giant preying mantis, although it had mental appendages
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and cartoon details about it. It also looked more squat than the
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terrestrial version of the insect, shorter and more robust. Its many
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arms worked up and down my existence, probing and testing every bit. It
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seemed to put no effort into comforting me, yet it did through some sort
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of telepathy imply that it would be easier for both of us if I stopped
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struggling. Eventually I did, and it left.
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I lost almost all physical awareness, and felt my mind drifting
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through something resembling outer space. I saw stars, celestial bodies, etc,
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but was not sure if they were as such, or molecules. The difference
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seemed irrelevent at that point. I knew I had a brain, and a pair of
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lungs. I thought that was all. Imagining myself, I saw the brain
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connected to the lungs behind it, and realized that these two organs in
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this array must have influenced the design of that dreaded spaceship ""The
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ENTERPRISE". As I charted the cosmos, I became aware that through a bit
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of imagining, or some similar process, I could arrange them to my own
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satisfaction. I found that different arrangements produced different
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mental states, some I had known while others were wildly strange. Upon
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reflection, the impression that I had was that I was re-arranging
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molecules which were fundamental in neuro-transmitting tasks. One
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arrangement of the "stars" felt similar to LSD, one to 2CB, and so forth.
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I was not aware of this at the time, however. I simply moved the stars
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according to whim, and felt pleased with the immediate physical results.
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I'm not sure if it was intentional or not, but I eventually slipped
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into another "room". This was the typical round room deep psychedelics take
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me to. However, this time it was much larger than normal. Around the
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perimeter flowed the forms of creatures who looked more like cartoon
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drawings of dogs than anything else. They seemed Mayan, in as far as
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they all had dragging tongues and eyes which looked only backwards.
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They seemed to give me a grinning, sarcastic sneer as they drifted past me.
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Meanwhile, in the middle of the "sphere", I had other entities to deal
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with. I cannot come up with any words to describe most of them,
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although the frivolous doodles which cover the margins of my school
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lecture notes come closer than anything at approximating their forms. The
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only clear example I can present is one interesting specimen: I saw a
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Mexican man, dressed in traditional Huichole garb, kneeling and vomiting
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on himself. He looked up at me with a knowing glance, and continued his
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vomiting. I wondered later if I really met him or not. I also wondered
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what entheogen or technique took us to the same place. It occurred to me
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a month or so later to wonder if he had seen a college honkey, stoned to
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the gills on mushrooms, floating through his own sacred space.
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I finally relaxed, enjoying the inevitability of it all. instantly,
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flowers looking like opium poppies surrounded me and the "machine-elves" of
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DMT fame came to visit. They assured me that I was safe, and really a
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nice guy to boot. In their high pitched collective voice, they sang a song
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revealing to me not only my own nature, but that of all creatures as well.
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They assured me that my DNA was not only similar to their own, but part of
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as well as *encompassing* their own "code". They stressed the
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simultaneousness of this seemingly contradictory statement. I started
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to laugh out loud, mostly at the absurdity of it all. My laughing became
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uncontrollable. It should be added that at this point I was so immersed that
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it did not matter if my eyes were open or closed. However, this laughing
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was the first event in what seemed like months which reminded me of my
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personal form and body. And I laughed... I could not stop!
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The laughing at one point "locked on" to a particular vocal
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frequency, and I could not get it to budge. Indeed, I was aware that I
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was releasing a monotonal hum. Even breathing did not seem to interfere
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with its clarity. I found it satisfying, and started to explore. By
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going with the sound, instead of trying to stop it, it grew louder and
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louder. Eventually it culminated in what McKenna correctly describes as
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a metallic buzzing sound. Very much like the sound of a cicada, but with
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many other elements added. I did feel as a bug making the sound, and I
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had an intuitive understanding of metamorphosis. As this sound
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continued, I noticed it was affecting my visions. Before, the
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elves were rapidly and almost violently competing for my attention, each
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trying to show me a better toy than the last. But this incredible sound
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caused them to order themselves into intricate yet subtle patterns of
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the greatest coherency. By slightly altering the pitch of the growl, or
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modulating it, the patterns changed. After some time, I could actually
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sculpt three dimensional objects. I did not attempt to make a chair, or
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a dog, or anything like that, but rather sculptures of pure light and
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revolving spheres, towers of emerald surrounded by throbbing orbs of
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sound and love. These were the toys I presented back to the
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machine-elves. This ability continued for what I would (with no way of
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ever knowing) say was roughly a half hour. This was the most satisfying,
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absurd, and enjoyable feeling I have ever had in my life. All
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frustrations associated with inability to express myself were flattened.
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It was as if I were vomiting my soul right into the air, where it loved
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to dance and play.
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So now I am left with a ridiculous set of goals in life. I have done
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this again with another person who claimed the ability, and indeed the
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visions are seen by both parties. Like mental sex of untold richness.
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The possibilities of this "language" with no danger of misinterpretation
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are so staggering I can't conceive of pursuing any other future for us
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monkies. To my amazement, and despite my wide sampling of the
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psychedelic community across the U.S., this phenomenon is almost
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unknown. I don't know what triggers it, only that if I eat enough
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mushrooms it will come. Strangely, I have not been able to have much
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success with the vocalizations on DMT, where this supposedly manifests
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itself more readily.
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There you have it.
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