52 lines
2.9 KiB
Plaintext
52 lines
2.9 KiB
Plaintext
File: HOW TO SHOPLIFT
|
||
|
||
New Economic Policy
|
||
By the Stainless Steal Rat.
|
||
TAP # 80 12-82
|
||
|
||
Tired of all that bullshit the government has been giving about how to reduce
|
||
inflation? Well here is the real way to cut your bills:
|
||
|
||
I. Super-Markets
|
||
|
||
The next time you visit your local rippoff center that claims to have the
|
||
lowest prices in town, you can make sure that they keep that promise.
|
||
When you catch an employee loafing on the job borrow (permanently) his or her
|
||
little price tag gun. After several minutes of examination and trial you can
|
||
stamp your own prices just like the pro. Need I go further? Of couse. Just
|
||
for good relations take all those funny little rolls of stickers that are used
|
||
to show when there is a special and all the blank rolls for the tag gun. Beware
|
||
Make sure that the product you stamp with your gun is the same as the tag is.
|
||
Some tags are pre labled: Grocery, candy, milk, etc. Make sure the tag matches
|
||
the item. Never remark items that are common. Many times the cashiers know
|
||
the price. Also, with your "special" strikers be careful. Many times they are
|
||
distributed by the manufacturer of the product. If you are in a hurry just
|
||
take the price tag off the cheapest bargin brand and put it on the best quality
|
||
brand. This can be tricky if not impossible becausee some places have price
|
||
tags that are pre-cut, so they fall apart if you try that.
|
||
|
||
II. Counter Espionage and other Tricks for all of you that shoplift (or are
|
||
about to begin) here are some tips:
|
||
-Stay away from large Malls and Shopping centers, it's like narc city. The
|
||
Narcs like it there because they can bust little kids for shoplifting candy.
|
||
-Keep your eyes open for mirrors, two way mirrors, cameras and nosey clerks.
|
||
-If you are with a partner keep your mouth shut. They have hidden mics in
|
||
those tall columns that seem to hold up the roof.
|
||
-Avoid all large silvered objects. In on place I know, they put small
|
||
cameras in large christmas balls (Merry Christmas Huh?)
|
||
-Look for people that you always see in the same store and for people who
|
||
walk around like zombies and pay more attention to the people in the store than
|
||
the products.
|
||
-Avoid all people with 2-way radios. They are most definitly no hams with
|
||
their 2 meter.
|
||
If you decide to shoplift (naughty you), remember all you have to do is
|
||
remove the item from its package and take off all store marking and tags and
|
||
they cannot prove the item is not yours. Use display models if possible, be-
|
||
cause you can fiddle with them without suspicion. If you think the risk of
|
||
getting caught is too great or you cannot get it because of its size (I know a
|
||
guy who shoplifted a 20" crock pot) you can still get it at a greatly reduced
|
||
price. Many places use felt tip markers or pens to show reductions. When a
|
||
store has a closout, merely bring along a pen and mark your own prices.
|
||
|
||
-----END
|
||
|