156 lines
8.8 KiB
Plaintext
156 lines
8.8 KiB
Plaintext
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| -- General Destruction Volume 002 -- |
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| After a week up away from Michigan |
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| I've returned with a few little trix |
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| on how to mess up any hotel(s) which |
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| you may stay at while on vacation. |
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|______________________________________|
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______________________________________________________________________________
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About this file: This tfile, originally written by The Unknown Witness,
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has been re-edited, re-phrased, and re-styled, so that it appears to you in 80
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columns, in lowercase, and in the "traditional" DOA format. The file is being
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restyled because we felt that it should be rereleased upon the instatement of
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the Unknown Witness into DeadMan Operations and Activities. So, we proudly
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present to you a retyped issue of his infamous "General Destruction" series -
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the second in the series - Volume Two.
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______________________________________________________________________________
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Elevators: (A PRIME source of entertainment!) Get ahold of some
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opaque, (nontransparent), tape, and find the photosensor on the elevator door.
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Cover this with the tape, and it will prevent the door from moving at all! Do
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like so...
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--- Elevator ---
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|| ||
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|| <- Door -> ||
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|* *|
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|| ||
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|| ||
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----------------
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Tape up one or both of the asterisks, (which usually emit some noticable
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light from one side, visible if you place your hand or something inbetween.)
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Elevators Part Two: You will need as many guys as elevators 4 this...
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Go to the top floor and hold the door open, (with the door open button, not
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the door switch). Get all of the guys to get all the elevators together at
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the same floor as you also, and then tell them to press all the buttons on it.
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Take the stairs down to the lobby and sit and watch what happens on the ground
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floor... Gets to be quite humorous watching everybody trek up the stairway...
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Elevators Part Three: Go to the very top floor of the building, and
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press the stop button. Leave, and try to stop up as many elevators as you can
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before the management gets suspicious.
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levators Part Four: For this, you will need a lockpick, with some
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knowledge of picking skill.. Find the keyswitch which reads as follows, "Fire-
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Man's Priority," and do your best to pick the case. If you can get it open
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somehow, you will be able to control where and when the elevator stops. (At
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last, you won't have to be constantly interrupted by walkons.) But, you
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should get off within 7 minutes of your "trip," lest you be detected and over-
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ridden by the keyswitch found at the main lobby.
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Elevators Part Five: Go to the top floor, and jam a tennis ball into
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the railing where the doors travel. If you are lucky, the door will remain
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open and will prevent any use of that elevator.. I advise you to do this to
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all of the elevators, so they cannot use one to go up and repair it.. Use the
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stairs and go down a floor or two to avoid unwanted detection.
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Escalators: Press the emergency stop button and stop the thing..heh..
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really makes an "impact" on the older, more unbalanced passengers! Also, try
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the following: As the step in front of you is raising brace your foot to
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support it. At the end of the ride, the escalator won't be able to lower the
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step, and it will act as an elevator jam! Another way to accomplish this is
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by bracing your foot against the right or left sides of the escalator, so as
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to misalign the alignment grooves. Another "nonchalant emergency stop..."
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HousePhones: Prank everybody in the hotel, tell them that, "there
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is a problem with the database," and they should, "come down and reregister at
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the front desk."
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Cable Descrambler: The cable boxes which use a key that you can
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purchase from the front desk are easily picked with a paperclip and some time.
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Also, with these kind of boxes, it is very recommended to get a maid's key,
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which is available in many locked laundryclosets. "But how do I get in if its
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locked?" you ask. No, you don't have to pick it, just wait. Sooner or later,
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one will be left open, just walk around the hotel, and when the maids are
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relocating sheets, they will leave them open for the simple reason that it
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makes life easier without having to unlock-open-close-lock it everytime they
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make another trip. A few seconds are all you need to get a key, and get into
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a room, and "borrow" somebody else's cablekey.
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Another kind of cable unit frequently used in hotelrooms is the kind that
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bills you automatically once you select a channel. Get this open, and try to
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find the set of dipswitches in the rear of the unit which tells the front
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desk which room to bill, and have phun at a fellow occupant's expense!
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Room Service: Since in most hotels, the switchboard cannot trace, you
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can order room service to every room in the hotel.. Also, you can order your
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food to another room while the occupant of that room is out. (Remember, you
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have that maid's "master" key!) Accept the food, and don't forget to tell him
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to add a generous tip onto the bill. Nobody will know anything's amiss until
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they try to check out...ahem.
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The Sauna: A quick, easy, but always entertaining way of clearing out
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the sauna is by pissing into a bottle or tub, and quickly dumping it onto the
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rocks. The heat becomes unbearable, and the smell...ooh...
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General Planning: (Should have come at the beginning, eh?) Well,
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always have some sort of a backup person/alibi/excuse to get you out of
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trouble if you're caught or pursued. While I'm on the subject..
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When running from security people, use the elevator as much as possible,
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because you can throw them off by riding a floor down, running two up, etc..
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Also, always make sure that you aren't seen running from your last prank, this
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is sure to make people notice that it's you who is causing the havoc - always
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remain cool, calm, and collected. Remember, if you're ever caught, pleading
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stupidity is a clear way to freedom -- the customer is always right!
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The lobby is NOT the place to mess around in. Use the top floors, it
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takes security a lot longer to figure out what's going on up there. Also, do
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not mess with fire alarms, it's a federal offense, and isn't humorous, (xcept,
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of course, at 3:35AM..)
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Use the courtesy and lobby phones to your advantage, they're free, and
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can come in handy when having to locate somebody. Also, if you can get access
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to more places to explore, try the service elevator, it's usually not far from
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the regular elevators, most often near the kitchen for room service delivery.
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Ignorance is a good excuse here, again, "I really thought it was a public
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elevator, sir..." Also, this elevator usually has access to floors that the
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normal "peasant" elevator doesn't, they're always phun to phuck with. The
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roof, basement, and machinery room are a few x-amples of "phun locations"
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which are usually accessable thru the service elevator. If you can get to any
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of these locations, search for the backup diesel generator. Activate it and
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the combined power from the prime and secondary generators will provide you
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with a rather impressive fireworx display...
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______________________________________________________________________________
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That's about it...if you have any questions/complaints/hallucinations/
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comments/pangs/attractions on anything in this file, you can get in touch with
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me at the Kangaroo HQ AE line, the number as listed below. Also, tell what's-
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his-face that I sent ya, and tell him that the new name sux and that it is
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corny, and he should change it back to "Beyond Reality..!"
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- Unknown Witness
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______________________________________________________________________________
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"General Destruction" is a TradeMark of DeadMan Operations and Activities, Inc
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- Watch for more G.D. volumes from the Unknown Observer! -
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(K)opyWrong 1986 All Rights Phucked!
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______________________________________________________________________________
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_| This file was Written by: The Unknown Observer |_
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| Edited by: Riff Raff |
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| Inspired by: Acid Reign |
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______________________________________________________________________________
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<*> This Has Been A Guest-Authored D.O.A. TextFile Presentation - (K)1986! <*>
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