112 lines
6.2 KiB
Plaintext
112 lines
6.2 KiB
Plaintext
Bernzomatic Tricks
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A Bernzomatic is one of those little portable two-tank welding & soldering
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blowtorches. The mayhem applications of such a device are nearly innumerable.
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- Try any of my Krazy Glue tricks that stick metal together, with a
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Bernzomatic.
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- Solder that dick's bike's wheels, or handlebars, or brakes, stuck. These
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could not be done with Krazy Glue.
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- Weld locker doors shut. Works even better than with Krazy Glue 'coz there's
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no solvent for this.
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- If you see a bike chained to a fence, you can either weld the chain to both
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the fence and the bike, or solder the keyhole/combo knob stuck.
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- Make modern art out of school desks: Weld them all together in a pseudo
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random arrangement.
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- Take battery, spark plugs, starter motor, or whatever out of car so it won't
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start. Then weld hood on.
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- Deflate enemy tires; weld wheel nuts on so tire can't be removed. Krazy Glue
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the valve so it can't be refilled either.
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Be creative (destructive?)
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More pranks:
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- Have fun switching price tags in the local department store or labels in the
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supermarket.
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- Go to the trick and joke shop and get a BIG rubber spider. Go to the
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liquor store with this and put the spider in a bottle (twist off caps are
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best)
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- Place motor oil all over stairways and ramps.
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- Wipe boogers on buttons of elevators and other things (only if you are REAL
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gross)
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- Go to Radio Shack. You know how all the parts hang from hooks in little
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plastic bags stapled to a card? Krazy Glue a few thousand of those to
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the hooks they hang from. Do this to shelved stock as well; if you don't
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make yourself look suspicious you will appear to be "just looking".
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You can also do this in drugstores and other stores, but I have named
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Radio Shack 'coz I was thrown out of one once for knowing more about the
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TRS-80 on display than the manager...
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- If you live in an area with no cable TV, go up on your enemy's roof at a
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time when he is not there to hear your footsteps, and re-aim his
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antenna in a random direction. If he has a rotator, Krazy Glue its gears
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so it will not rotate the aerial.
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- Attach a bud box to your enemy's house. Then, blue-box thru it a lot
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and at a dangerous time. Watch him try to explain it to Bell!
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- If you can get access to your enemy's computer without him knowing, remove
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a few choice chips. Like ROM, the 6502, a few RAMS, or the Video chip.
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The Keyboard Rom is ideal - leave in other chips, and your enemy will have
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a working machine EXCEPT...
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(for comod0res: pull the kbd CIA chip)
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- Similarly, if you have the same machine as your school, you have a
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supply of spare parts for free! All you do is, when you have a blown
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chip, take it out of your machine, go to school, wait until you can have
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2 minutes ALONE in the computer room, and then swap your blown chip for the
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good one in one of your school's machines. ESPECIALLY EASY if your
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school has Apples, coz then you don't need to fuck with unscrewing
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anything. The school will NEVER ask questions, they will assume the chip
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blew from natural causes (which it actually did, but not in their
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machine) and they will PROMPTLY fix it themselves, so you will not even
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be without the use of a school computer for long! Also, if you are
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caught red-handed, just say you are trying to get the disk card to work
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or something; if they discover the blown chip right away they might
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think you "accidentally" blew it and may make you pay for it (at their
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reduced school rate!) but that is the VERY worst that can happen if you are
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REALLY stupid.
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- Remember the Hockey-puck Krazy Glue trick of my last file? Well, glue
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your enemy's records into one big long cylinder in the same manner.
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- Let's see how fast that rotary razor will run with the blades Krazy Glued
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to the screen!
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- Steal a box of your enemy's favorite disks. If he has any wares
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on it that you want, copy them. Then, open them all up, and, with RUBBER
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GLOVES ON so as not to fuck up his data, randomly place the actual disks
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in other jackets, so that the labels on his disks are completely wrong.
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Krazy Glue the jackets shut so he won't get suspicious.
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Now, at your earliest convenience, return his disks (stick them under a
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desk at school or something so he will think he lost them), and wait
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for him to try and boot up some! "Gee, I think I'll play Karateka....
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What? Applewriter? What the fuck..."
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- If your enemy has a Commodore 64, give him a disk of neat0 programs.
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Include a file called "auto-boot menu", which he will
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assume is exactly what its name implies.
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Now, the file with that name should be as follows:
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You may have heard of programs that
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can format 40 tracks on the 1541. You should also know that this knocks the
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drive head against the track 35 post. "Auto-boot menu" should
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repeatedly, non-stop, bang the head against this post in an attempt to
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format/read/write track FIFTY. This will totally FUCK his alignment to
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death, and if he is stupid and has never read comodore magazines,
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he will go to a computer store and pay a hundred bucks or so
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to get it fixed.
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(HINT: you cannot do this using DOS, you must program the stepper motor.)
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- Take your enemy's disk notcher. When you get home with it, take it apart.
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If it is the kind that resembles a one-hole punch, then remove the
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blade and return it to him. If it is the plastic Taihaho job, take off
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the 2 screws at the bottom. Take out the blade, which should be bevelled.
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Grind it so it is completely rectangular, then file the edge so it
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is dull. Put it back together and return it to your enemy. I guarantee
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you, he will never use it again.
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- Take a piece of square (1/2") mild steel stock about a foot long and,
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under heat, bend it into the shape of a horseshoe magnet. Paint it red.
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It should have no magnetic field at all, but surrepetitiously place it
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underneath all of your enemy's disks. You will do no damage but the look on
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his face...
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- If you REALLY hate your enemy then just go out and buy a real magnet,
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and do the same thing.
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- Krazy glue ALL the buttons in an elevator so they cannot be pushed.
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Great to do in REALLY tall buildings.
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Well I hope that gives you a few MORE ideas, have fun making thy foes
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miserable.
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