97 lines
3.9 KiB
Plaintext
97 lines
3.9 KiB
Plaintext
******FUCKING A PLUNGER******
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*Auther: Annoying Nut Bug *
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*****************************
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Fucking your plunger
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There are many ways to have sex with a plunger. It doesn't matter if you are
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a
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girl or a guy, you too can have the fun of having a special relationship
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with
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your plunger.
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THE METHODS:
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A) Through The Anus
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Both men and women can enjoy this method. (Which, my dad taught me!) Now,
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make
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sure you have a bottle of vaseline. Ok, after you've purchased your bottle
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of
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vaseline, go to a private room and lock the door. (Or leave it unlocked if,
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for
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some reason, you want to be caught. freak.) Take off you pants and remove
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your
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undergarments (if any) and put on some nice mood music. I suggest Marvin
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Gaye
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or the Misfits, preferably the Misfits. After you've done that, take the
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vasel-
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ine and rub up and down and all around the handle of the plunger. (And
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anywhere
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else you want to rub it on.) Procede to lay on your back. Lift your legs up
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in
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the air or back by your head. Be sure to secure your knees when they are
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held
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or back because this next part is going to sting! (So i've been told.) Begin
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to
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let the handle of the plunger penetrate your rectum. You are going to have
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to
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feel through the pain. If you are a homosexual you may even think this
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tickles.
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Let the plunger go in as deep as you can handle it. Begin to push and pull
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the
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the handle back and forth. Ignore the squish sounds. They probably aren't
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healthy, but your sticking a motherfucking plunger in your ass so what the
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fuck
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were you expecting?!?! Now, while doing this begin stroking your cock or
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rubbing your vagina (or both!) until you get off and then dismount the
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handle
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and repeat until you are satisfied.
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B) In The Vagina:
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If your a girl, and you wish to insert the handle into your vagina, follow
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these instructions. Insert the the handle of the plunger into your vagina.
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Treat it like a penis. There is no need for vaseline. You see, when you
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start
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to stimulate your clitoris, girls, you will start to secrete vaginal fluids.
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You can use these fluids to make the insertion and desertion of the handle
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more
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smoothly. Let it poke your clitoris until you lose control of your emotion
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and
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then pull the handle out and start again when you feel like it. Be sure to
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wash the yucky pussy juices off the handle, because that's gross! (And
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fucking
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a plunger is not!)
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C) With Your Penis
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This one actually involves the plunging part of the plunger. Make sure your
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plunger is not a used one because that would be fucking gross. (As opposed
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to
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fucking a plunger to begin with!) Watch some pornography or think about a
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hot
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bitch with a loose pussy that snaps. (When a vagina "snaps," that means the
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muscle control in this vagina is so strong it can grab the scrotum and pull
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on
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it without her whole body moving. Now, let me tell you, these snapping
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vaginas
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are very rare and special. If you ever see one, (You know, outside cutting
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grass or catching small animals by their tails.) fuck it immediately! Well
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anyway, when you feel your aroused, take your plunger and being plunging on
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the
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whole groin area. Suction out all the air till is nice and tight on your
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balls.
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(Watch out, your meats can only take seven pounds of pressure before your
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sick
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perversion becomes a fucked up accident.) After you feel you have pulled
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enough
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air from the area begin humping it. (Like your mom.) If you break the seal,
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don't worry just repump the plunger. NOTE: If you have a penis over one
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inch.
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You will need to cut a whole on the end of the plunger small enough so there
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is
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no air that can escape. (If you make to whole too big, fill the excess with
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tissues.) Now, you have a tight suction on your balls and a tight hole to
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fuck.
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(kinda like popping a cherry with another bitch sucking your balls.!)
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Now let is be known I have never had sexual relations with my plunger. I sat
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down one day and decided to think how it could be possible to fuck a
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plunger.
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Enjoy and don't get caught or something!
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