114 lines
6.6 KiB
Groff
114 lines
6.6 KiB
Groff
From davet@hrc63.co.uk Mon Jun 12 17:01:36 1989
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From: davet@hrc63.co.uk (Dave Thorpe)
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Subject: Nigel The Hedgehog, chapter five
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The Saga of Nigel the Hedgehog
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Chapter V
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~~~~~~~~~
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Authors: Chapter I > Chapter II > Chapter III > Chapter IV >
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Chris > Pete > Gary > Kelvin > Chris > Davet > Gary&Kelvin
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Well, thought Nigel, I fight the forces of darkness once again, but that can
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wait until another day. He returned to his car, a heavily customised one, known
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throughout the world ( at least by NTH scholars ) as the hyperultramegareally-
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quitecoolgoesfastdaveandsophynotquitethesizeofavolkswagenbeetle car ( or the
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Hedge-mobile or Road-hog ! ). He got into it, as usual it didn't start, so he
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told it to hurry up, and it repiled ... Well actually it didn't reply, that is
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a stupid idea, and couldn't even make a TV series. So, as usual, he got out the
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starting handle and gave it a quick burst of speed. The car, as usual, tuned to
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perfection, roared into action. Nigel managed to catch hold of it as it flashed
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over his head, and got into the drivers seat just in time to swerve away from a
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lamppost ( incidentally not lit, despite the hour, you know what they're like )
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The car flashed along the road until ....
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He reached the location that was vital to his goal. The shop called
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"Second Skin", a leather wear and rubber clothes shop that would supply nigel
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with all the attire required for the first part of his mission (which he HAD
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chosen to accept). He entered the shop through the doors (another of his
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amazing abilities) and started to look around at the goods for sale.
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Rubber swimsuits, straps and thongs, buckles and studs, whips and handcuffs.
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Eventually a rather seductively half undressed lady sheep squeaked over to
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Nigel and said, "Can I interest you in anything sir?", rather suggestively.
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"Yes", our stiff upper lipped hero replied (getting stiff in other
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places as well),"I need a full rubber outfit as quickly as possible."
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She measured him up for the works, rubber trousers, leather jacket,
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rubber jack boots and a few tightly fitting straps. The jacket was very
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expensive as holes had to be cut for each of nigels spines. Fitted up in
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his vital gear nigel left the shop feeling fully equiped for his next
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trial. He creaked and squeaked back into his car and off he went ....
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screeeeech ..... Nigel slammed on the breaks. He had forgotten a piece
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of equipment which was vital to his goal ... the eggwhisk. Nigel headed
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back towards "Second Skin". As he entered the room the sexy ewe made a
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direct line towards him, knocking over various fetishtic stands in her
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way. Their eyes met. Nigel's throat dried, as he tried to ask the sexy
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dame the all too important question.
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"Do you sell eggwhisks ?", he spluttered. The sexy chick's eyes lit up,
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eggwhisks were her fetishism too.
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Quick wittedly she dribbled, "What size ? We have large, extra large,
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and super-hero large".
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"What do you think ?", Nigel boastfully quipped, as he pulled back his
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spines to reveal his thick, heavy laiden utility belt.
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Nigel followed as the leggy broad fingered Nigel behind a nearby curtain ...
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On the other side of the curtain, Mr. Benn found himself in a changing room
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with a mirror and a door at the opposite end. He admired his reflection in the
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mirror for a few seconds and then stepped through the door. Suddenly,
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everything changed and he found himself on the film set of a blue movie. He
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could tell this by the number of people huddled together in the blue light
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inserting as many parts of their anatomy into as many orifices of other
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peoples' bodies as was possible. As he got closer, a flatulent middle-
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aged man in a director's chair cried, "Quick, there's a hedgehog. Lets
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get him involved in the action." Before his superfast brain had a chance
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to react Nigel was flung into the midst of the activity.
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Nigel was certainly in the midst of the activity, time seemed, like the bodies,
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not so much to pass as to flow by. ' CUT ' shouted a voice. The people, en
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masse ( How else ? ) got up and walked off the set, leaving a much confused
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hedgehog behind. The director turned to him and said, 'I'll see you tomorrow,
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here are some keys for a hotel room'. Nigel thanked him dazedly, and headed
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off. He somehow found it 'hard' to sleep after the exertions, and merely
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drifted of into a haze of anticipation of the next day. He got up bright and
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early ( well, early anyway ), and headed for the set. He arrived at it and saw
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the familiar huddle of bodies, he recognised some limbs as belonging to the
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people of the previous day. The director said 'Go to the makeup room, Nigel'.
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Despite the fact that Nigel desperately wanted to get stuck in, Nigel complied.
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He went to the room, and stepped in. Inside the room stood a very sexy ewe, who
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he felt he had seen earlier. He turned, but the door was locked, and he
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realised, in a flash of knowledge, that he would not return. Looking to the
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ewe, he thought, he had to release that frustration somehow ...................
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..............................................................................
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............( where are those noises 'coming' from )..........................
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..............................................................
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But suddenly Nigel felt a rush of Morals coming on. He remembered his
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mother, sitting at home, rocking in her rocking chair. Suddenly he
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felt terribly guilty and began to wane a little bit. The sexy ewe remarked
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on his apperance - how soft his needles had suddenly gone (well do *you*
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know what happens?) - and how his steamy animal-like nature had suddenly
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disappeared. But nigel was saved. As he realised what a good time he was
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missing, with this dream-like ewe, a man he recognised from the shop
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appeared from no-where (Nigel was jealous - he couldn't do that!).
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Nigel reached into his utility belt, pulled out his car keys and gouged
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the man to death, then walked out casually (well as casually as you can
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wearing bondage), another of his superpowers being the ability to pass
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through locked doors. He now found himself back in the shop and
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hanging from his utility belt was the skimpy negligee he had skilfully
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removed from Nancy the nymphomaniac nurse in the 3D edition of
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"Confessions of a veterinary Nurse with a rubber and hedgehog fetish"
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that he had co-starred in. "Ahh, memories!", he sighed mournfully and
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stepped out knowing that he would never forget his time as the hedgehog
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world's first sex symbol.
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-=*=-
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Coming soon on a computer near you....Chapter six!
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Dave Thorpe (davet@uk.co.gec-rl-hrc)
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